Life in a small town
by Huds2n
Summary: A story about how Janet and Eddie found each other once again after the season 2 finale of October Road.
1. Chapter 1

Ok October Road fan fiction fans – I am very new to this so please bare with me – I did not create any of these characters I just love them – I am dedicating this story to my friends, The Happy Donut and Hookedonfanfic's for encouraging me to write this story – I hope you like it. This is my take on how Janet and Eddie found their way back to each other.

(This story begins during the season finale of season 2 of October Road where Eddie and Janet are together in his hospital room and she has just confessed to her night with Rooster. Eddie has just screamed at Janet to find some place to rot and that he is rejecting her. She goes to Hannah's engagement party and tries to pretend that everything is ok but deep down she knows that it is not and never will be again. )

Janet finds herself at home after leaving Hannah's party and feeling as though she has made a complete mess of her life. She told Hannah that Eddie had forgiven her but that was not true. Instead he was so upset and enraged that he told her to rot and he was most definitely rejecting her. She could not believe what a mess her life had become. How do you go from so completely happy to so completely devastated in one night? She knew one thing was for sure that she could not remain in Knight's Ridge. She could not face Eddie being so angry and hurt by what she had done and she most definitely could not deal with Rooster and the ultimate betrayal of their friendship. How could he have taken advantage of her during such an emotional and drunken state, she thought?

Any way she tried to rationalize it there was just no way she could go back to the life she had before Eddie. As she started to pack her things, she thought of all the fun times she had with Eddie and how their relationship had grown. As she packed her suitcase and fumbled through her dresser drawers she came across that most favored football jersey that made Eddie infamous in Knight's Ridge. She knew that she should give it back but she just couldn't bring herself to do so. As if it was an involuntary action, she threw it in her bag and finished packing all the things she felt she needed. She decided she would not tell anyone that she was leaving except Sully. She packed her Jeep, covered her furniture and secured everything in the house as she knew she would be gone for a very long time.

As she looked back at her house she didn't quite know what the future held for her or when she would be able to return to her house but she knew deep down she was doing the right thing. She headed down the road and made the very familiar turns to the one place that had always brought her some happiness, Sully's. She knew that she had to have the most difficult conversation with Sully that she had ever had and she wasn't sure if he would understand but she had grown to love Sully and was very upset that she was going to be leaving him so out of the blue. There was hardly anyone in Sully's except a few regulars. Janet walked in and saw him right away. As usual he turned around and flashed her that famous smile.

"Hey Sully."

"Janet…good to see you…how that's boy of yours…is he getting better?"

"Yeah about that…Eddie and I are no longer together…"

"What? What happened? This doesn't have anything to do with Rory…"

"No, Sully it has to do with us…Eddie and me…but that is why I came in here tonight…I need to let you know that I am moving out of the Ridge…I won't be able to work here anymore…"

"When are you leaving? I just don't understand what is happening Janet…"

"I am leaving tonight Sully and I know that you are going to be upset with me and I am sure I am not making any sense right now but I just can't stay here…I can't explain it now but know I just need to get away from here and figure out what went wrong in my life and try to figure out what to do with the rest of it…I screwed up big time and right now I just feel…..lost"

"I just don't understand Janet. You and Eddie were so happy I just don't understand what could possibly have happened…you are my best bartender I don't know if this town can survive without you but if you are sure that this is what you have to do then you know I'll support you…I may not like it but you do what you need to do and remember that you will always have a place here at Sully's when you decide to come home."

"Thanks Sully…you have always been so good to me…I feel terrible leaving you like this but I just can't stay here…not now."

"Where will you go Janet?"

"I don't exactly know I haven't figured that out just yet but I will keep in touch Sully I promise."

With that, Janet gave Sully a hug and walked out the front door. She turned around in the parking lot and looked back at the bar, smiled to herself and got into her Jeep. She headed out of Knight's Ridge and as she looked in the rearview mirror tears began to stream down her face. The one place she knew would give her some clarity as to what to do next was the one place where there were people who loved her no matter what mistakes she's made…so she settled in for the long drive to Providence to visit her grandparents.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two:

Janet arrived in Providence hours later and felt exhausted. She decided to go to the hotel that was near the nursing home to get some sleep. Since she stayed there often when she visited the desk clerk recognized her right away and soon she was in her room, resting and reviewing her day.

What was she going to do? Where was she going to live? How was she going to tell Hannah? She felt overwhelmed by all the uncertainty that was facing her. She had never done anything like this…ever in her life. What was she thinking?

She pulled the one thing out of her bag that had always brought her comfort and that was Eddie's football jersey. She pulled it over her head and decided that tomorrow she would figure out all of life's questions but for tonight she would just try to forget everything accept for the smell of Eddie that lingered on his jersey and remember all the times that he had brought a smile to her face. This was her last thought before she drifted off to sleep.

Bright and early in the morning, Janet headed for the nursing home to see her grandparents. They would certainly have the answers she was seeking and be able to give her the advice she craved as they always had.

Janet was so happy to see her grandparents and they felt the same although her grandma knew right away that something was not right. Janet spent several hours just visiting with her grandparents and finding out what they had been up to since she last visited…the last visit that included her boyfriend Eddie.

Finally her grandma could not take it anymore once her and Janet were alone, "what is really going on here Janet…I can tell something is just not right with you, please tell me what is going on."

Janet replied, "I have made a very large mistake…well several mistakes but the big one cost me my relationship with Eddie…we broke up Grandma and I don't think he will ever forgive me for what I did…I am so confused Grandma…how could I have been so wrong about so many things?"

"Well sweetheart, we all make mistakes but until you tell me what happened, I don't know if I can help you."

"I thought everything was going really well with me and Eddie but his ex girlfriend came back to town, recently divorced and gorgeous. She broke Eddie's heart like 10 years ago and some say he never really got over her. Everyone started to tell me about their relationship in high school and how in love they were. I guess I started to feel insecure but when I tried to call Eddie he tried to get off the phone with me so quickly saying he would call me back, but he didn't. Then she came into Sully's, her name is Rory and she is beyond beautiful. She started to ask me questions like "do you know Eddie?" as if I didn't know who he was. I kept thinking to myself why would she ask me that question. Then she asked me a question that I was totally unprepared for. She asked if I knew why he was so sad. Can you believe that? At first I was like what is she talking about but then it started me thinking…was he sad…had his feelings changed for me…does he feel sad being in a relationship with me instead of happy…does he want out…does he want to be with Rory again…so many questions went through my mind but the biggest one was why was he not trying to get in touch with me."

Janet continued, "a little while later, he came into the bar and acted as if nothing was wrong…he never mentioned seeing Rory or like the day was different in any way…I was so confused. So I asked him if anyone had come into the shop "out of the ordinary" to which he replied, "Nick's lawyer…wants to take him to New York or something."

"I was so shocked because he did not mention anything about Rory. When he finished his lunch he just left…no talk to you later, no thanks for lunch, no nothing…I felt like I could have been anyone not his girlfriend. He never acted like that before when he came in for lunch…he always hugged me or said talk to ya later or see ya tonight or something…I felt as though someone had just kicked me in the stomach. Not only that but I had Rooster in my ear all day talking about the great love between Eddie and Rory in high school – like it was legendary or something."

"After spending all day wondering what was going on and getting nothing but Eddie's voice mail when I called I had to go see him and talk to him and tell him what I was thinking or just find out what he was thinking. I have never been so scared in my life until I got to his house…"

"What happened sweetie", grandma said

"He was on the front porch on the bench with Rory and they started to kiss each other…I couldn't believe my eyes…every possible fear I had became reality in that moment…I couldn't drive away fast enough. I got home and honestly the rest is such a blur. I tried to call Hannah but I couldn't get a hold of her so I called Rooster and told him to bring alcohol. I know Grandma it isn't the way I should have handled it but I was so upset and hurt and felt as though my world had just completely unraveled…I just wanted to make it all go away. Rooster came over but all he could find was moonshine or some home brewed version of alcohol that was horrible but I didn't care I just kept drinking one shot after another. I started to talk to Rooster and say how stupid I had been thinking that once Rory came back to town that I stood a chance…I mean Eddie loved her and she broke his heart now she is back and practically throwing herself at his feet. Eddie and I had been dating for a long time but he never told me he loved me so how was I to know that he did…how was I to know that in that moment when they kissed that he realized that I was the girl he wanted to be kissing…how was I suppose to know that my entire would have changed for the better had I had some faith in my relationship with Eddie and just waited to talk with him…instead no I completely destroyed my relationship by throwing myself at Rooster of all people…"

"Janet that just doesn't make any sense…why would you do such a thing…that doesn't even sound like something you would do…I have known you your whole life Janet I just can not believe what you are saying to me."

"I know Grandma, I know this whole situation is horrible. Anyway, I will skip to the part when I wake up and realize that I just made the biggest mistake of my life and trusted "my friend" to be there for me but instead he acted on his own feelings and slept with me when I was crying, drunk and an emotional mess…I have never been so upset in my life. I know that it is my fault for putting myself in that situation but why would he do that to me knowing how much I loved Eddie…I told him that, Rooster, that I was in love with Eddie but apparently he didn't care…he saw this as an opportunity to get what he wanted…ahh Grandma I could not have done anything worse."

Janet began to cry and her grandma took her in her arms, "it's ok Janet…what happened then…"

"I kept trying to call Eddie and got Nick on the phone. Nick told me that Eddie had been attacked outside of Best Friend Windows and that he was in the hospital. He was asking for me. I said to come to the hospital. When I got there, Grandma it was awful…he was so hurt and bruised and I just couldn't believe what I had done. The events of the day seemed to fade from my mind and all I could think of was him. He smiled at me as best he could and then told me about the previous day and Rory coming to town. He told me everything Grandma and said that he realized that the only person he wanted to be kissing was me. He told me that he realized that he made this big mistake and was only hoping that I could forgive him. Really? Me forgive him…I just felt so horrible that I just ran…I ran from the room because I couldn't face the reality of what just happened."

"Grandma I was so wrong about everything. There was nothing I could do but tell him the truth. So I went to his room the next day and told him everything…I felt so completely small and stupid…he was so angry Grandma the look in his eyes I will never forget…he told me to go find some place to rot…that he was rejecting me…I know I deserved that Grandma but how can I face him now? He will never forgive me ever and why should he?"

"and not only that but now I have Rooster thinking that WE are going to be together…I am so angry with him Grandma I just can't even look at him. At Hannah's engagement party he is just following me around and trying to touch me and all I want to do is crawl in a hole and disappear. I told Hannah that Eddie forgave me and everything was fine. I mean how could I have ruined her party with my behavior…I couldn't so I just got through the day and came home…that is when I decided to leave Knight's Ridge and try and figure out my life…and now you know everything…are you disappointed Grandma?"

"Janet you know that I love you more than anything and that I am here for you always regardless of the mistakes you make but I think your decision to leave was a good one. It seems to me that before you can give yourself to someone else sweetie you need to love who you are and it seems pretty clear to me that you don't feel that way about yourself do you?"

"I honestly don't know Grandma…I thought that I had gained so much being with Eddie but I think that his uncertainty with our relationship in the beginning has just stuck with me and I always feel like this person who is so unworthy or like at any point he would just realize that I am not the person he wants to be with…when Rory came into the bar clearly just leaving Eddie and didn't know about me I guess I started to feel like I did when Eddie first asked me out…I wish I could say that I was stronger than this but I'm not…I don't know Grandma how am I going to get over feeling like this and how do I get over loving someone who hates me right now so much."

"Janet if age has taught me anything else it is that time can heal all wounds and I am certain that Eddie does not hate you…he sounds hurt and angry but perhaps it is good for the two of you to have some distance for a while so you don't hurt each other any more and can figure out who you both are…you know I have some people I want you to meet…"

"ahhh Grandma do you think now is a good time for that?'

"Janet trust me, these people may be able to help you more than you know."

Confused, Janet just looked at her grandma and said, "ok I guess."

Soon Janet's grandma entered the room with Mr. and Mrs. Edwardson. This couple had recently entered the nursing home due to an illness in which they both needed closer monitoring for a while until their health improved. The doctors felt that living on their own was dangerous so coming to the nursing home for about 6 months would be in their best interest. Janet's grandparents had met them shortly after they arrived at the nursing home and the foursome had become quite close. Mrs. Edwardson had told Janet's grandma that they had wanted to find someone to stay in their home while they were at the nursing home just to look after the place and grounds, however none of their children were able to get away for that amount of time. Remembering this, Janet's grandma got an idea and thought these two should definitely meet her granddaughter, Janet.

A short few hours later, Janet had a place to live and at least a course of action for the next 6 months. She could not believe her luck in finding this couple needing someone to stay in their house. The Edwardson's loved Janet immediately and felt instantly comfortable in her presence…not to mention Janet's grandparents talked about her non stop – they felt as though they knew her already. Janet heard the story and immediately offered to stay in their home and look after everything. She was especially excited about the garden that Mrs. Edwardson described in their backyard that had an all season's porch located near it so she could enjoy all the flowers from the comfort of the porch. All and all it seemed like the perfect scenario. Now that Janet had a place to go she felt a little more at ease but this was only the start of the things that Janet needed to figure out.

Soon it was time for Janet to return to the hotel and she said her goodbyes. The Edwardson's gave Janet the keys and all the information she needed to get to their home along with numbers of neighbors and people who could help her with anything that came up. Janet hugged her grandma especially tight right before they parted ways and said, "thank you so much Grandma for listening to me and loving me regardless of the stupid things I do."

Grandma replied, "Janet I love you so much and nothing in this world could make me not love you…but you are human and someday you are going to have to forgive yourself and learn to love that beautiful girl that is inside of you…we have all made mistakes in our lives some big and some small but it is how you handle those mistakes – that is what makes you a strong person…I know deep down you are strong Janet but you need to find that strength and learn to love who you are – flaws and all – someone will accept you for who you are and love you unconditionally regardless of the mistakes you make – that person may or may not be Eddie – love always finds a way…the thing about first love's Janet is that sometimes they are meant to be forever and sometimes they are meant to be just at that time…if it runs its course and isn't meant to be than it is a lesson learned and you will be wiser when it comes again but if it is truly meant to be forever that love will find its way back to you and will unbreakable…that is what I want for you Janet and that is what you deserve…so I am hoping that you will be able to use this opportunity to look at yourself Janet and find the qualities that all of us already see…the only one that doesn't see them is you….we love you so much"

With that Janet, in tears, leaves her grandparents and heads back to the hotel. As she sits in her hotel room on the couch and reviews her day and talk with her grandma she feels like her head is spinning. Janet thinks to herself that her grandma has always been able to tell her like it is…that maybe she is right…well there is one way to find out, resigning herself to her new future she says out loud, "tomorrow I head to my new life in a small town." With that being her last thought, she lays down and goes to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

(quick note: hang in there this is going to be a long story but I guarantee you will like the ending)

Chapter 3:

As Janet awoke the next morning she was both excited and terrified of the new life she was embarking upon. She packed up her things and left to meet her grandparents for an early breakfast before heading out to the town she would then call her own, well at least for the next 6 months. She was hoping that 6 months would be enough time to repair all the damage she had caused to herself and those around her.

After a nice breakfast Janet hugged both of her grandparents and her new friends the Edwardson's and got any last minute details that the Edwardson's had thought of. Mrs. Edwardson had written down all the things she thought would be helpful to Janet as to where things were and people to contact in the event the house needed repair. She also told Janet that they had called the neighbors and a few friends in town to let them know that Janet would be looking after the house and to make her feel welcome in town. Mrs. Edwardson was just so grateful that she had someone to watch her home and keep everything safe while they were in the nursing home. She was sure that her and her husband would be able to relax more and concentrate on healing now that Janet was there to help them with the one thing they worried about the most.

Janet just smiled and thought to herself, "I should be the one who is grateful this is really helping me out more than you can possibly know."

Silently as Janet drove away, her grandma sent a little prayer up to the heavens in hopes that Janet would be able to truly find herself and begin to love herself for the wonderful person that she was. She couldn't help but wonder if Eddie and Janet would ever find their way back to one another but she was hopeful that Janet would find the one that truly loved her…if she hadn't already.

As Janet drove towards the town she would now call home, she began to wonder what she would tell Hannah. She left in such a hurry that she never had a chance to talk to Hannah about her plans. She suspected that Hannah would be upset and when she checked her messages on her cell phone she was now sure of it, Hannah sounded like she was in a panic.

(back in Knight's Ridge)

Hannah was pacing in her living room trying to figure out what to do. She thought to herself, "where could Janet be…was she really ok at my party…she said she was, she said that they worked it out…she said that things were good even…but did she look happy? Maybe she was just upset about Eddie's beating…she wouldn't have lied to me…ohhh Janet you didn't tell me the truth because it was my engagement party (as if a light bulb had just gone off in Hannah's head)…you didn't tell me that Eddie was upset but what happened…I have got to find her…but she isn't answering her cell phone and all I get is her answering machine at home. Well there is only one way to find out…"

Hannah drove over to Janet's house and sure enough Janet's Jeep was gone. She thought, "well she gave me a key for emergencies and this is an emergency."

She let herself into the house and could not believe her eyes, everything was covered and when she went into Janet's bedroom and looked around everything was practically gone the same went for the bathroom as well…tears immediately fell down her face. She felt terrible. Janet was obviously covering her true feelings of what happened that day at the hospital at the party to protect Hannah. Janet was her best friend how could she have not seen it.

Her next stop was Sully's. She thought, "well if she went somewhere she would have to tell Sully right? He would certainly know where she is"

Hannah walked into Sully's and found him behind the bar as usual. She called out to him, "hey Sully what goes on?"

Sully replied, "well for starters I am missing my favorite bartender."

"Yeah that is actually why I stopped by I was hoping you knew where to find her. She must have taken some vacation time or something right. She isn't answering her phone and that isn't like Janet."

"She actually quit. She came in here late one night, I think it was the night of your party and said she needed to leave town…that her and Eddie were over and she needed to leave right away…she didn't say much else…she didn't know where she was going but the one thing she did say is that she felt she had to. I don't know Hannah Jane…the whole thing makes me sad…she was my best bartender and to be honest I looked at her as my daughter really…she was pretty upset."

"Thanks Sully, if I hear anything from her I'll let you know I am sure she would like to hear your missing her."

As Hannah walked out of the bar she felt this rage inside of her as if someone had just taken away her most prized possession. She needed to find out what made Janet feel as though she needed to leave…there was only one person who could answer that question and this time he couldn't go anywhere.

Eddie was laying in his bed in the hospital hoping at some point his head would stop pounding and the tears would stop coming. He kept replaying that day in his head over and over…the things he said to Janet – how could he say those things. He knew that they would hurt her…that's why he said them…at that moment he wanted to hurt her as much as he felt hurt. As he remembered that day that feeling of anger and hurt would boil right back up to the surface and the tears would start again. He was so angry with her he just could not understand how she could have done that…she slept with Rooster. How could she have done that to him…he just couldn't deal with it…how could he have come to the conclusion that she was truly the one he wanted to be with and have it fall apart right in front of his eyes hours later…how is that possible…why didn't she trust me…how could his Janet have done such a thing…what am I going to do? How do I tell people that we aren't together anymore? What do I say – I wish Owen were here…he is always good with the advice…who else could I trust with this…That was when Hannah Jane entered his hospital room…and rather angrily said,

"Eddie what in the hell did you say to her?"

"You know Hannah you have a lot of nerve showing up here and fighting her battles…that has got to be a new low even for you!"

"Fighting her battles!…what the hell are you talking about? I don't even know where she is…the last time I saw her she said she had talked to you and everything was "good" – that was the last time I saw her…no one knows where she is right now…she quit her job at Sully's and told him she felt as though she had to leave town…that she couldn't stay here anymore…why would she say that Eddie? I have a feeling something happened in this very room that gave her that idea…"

Shocked, Eddie says, "What! She is gone…where – you mean she went to visit her grandparents or something?" Trying to down play the situation…after all he was the victim right?

"No…Eddie…I mean she is gone…no one knows where she is…she covered her furniture…took everything from her bedroom and bathroom…quit her job at Sully's…gone."

Eddie just stared at Hannah as if he could not speak…he didn't know how he felt about this…he was so angry with Janet but yet the thought of her being gone was just not something he was prepared to deal with…Hannah didn't give him much time before she started in again on him…

"Eddie I am going to ask you again what did you say to her? Did you tell her to leave town or go away or what…why would she think she had to leave?"

"Hannah I was angry…I mean she just told me that she slept with Rooster…she actually had sex with another man…and Rooster…I just snapped…"

"and why do you think she did that Eddie…lets think back to that day, the day you chose to blow her off for the entire day and why did you do that Eddie, because, Rory your ex girlfriend, supposed love of your life who broke your heart in high school that prompted the following 10 years of your life to include being the town womanizer who now happens to be standing in your office looking like a Victoria secret supermodel newly divorced and apparently looking to see if she has any chance of rekindling an old flame…how did you chose to handle this situation well for starters you decided it wasn't important to call Janet back and proceeded to shut your phone off apparently so you had no further interruptions, you also decided it wasn't important for Rory to know that you were in a relationship with anyone but especially with Janet since Rory made a beeline for Sully's actually asking Janet if she KNEW who you were…really Eddie, than asked Janet why you seemed so sad…I am sure that was a great moment for Janet…than you finally decide to show up for lunch surprisingly…meanwhile all Janet has heard about all day is the infamous relationship of Rory and Eddie and how you used to do all these nice things for her and how much you loved her…I can only imagine what Janet is thinking at this point…I know I wouldn't feel very confident in that situation…but she is still trying to give you the benefit of the doubt so she asks you – comes right out and asks you if anyone unusual had been in your office…you really didn't pick up on that…but what was your response…Nick's lawyer from New York…you didn't seem to think that Rory's return was important enough to mention to your GIRLFRIEND…so now Janet is really letting those voices get to her the ones that are telling her that her relationship is in jeopardy…how can she compete with the love of your life…the history of the great Eddie and Rory…and lets face it most girls would be insecure around someone like Rory…but no Janet still tries to stay strong with all these odds against her and decides you know what I am just going to go over there and talk to him in person and just ask him what is really going on…but when she gets there, there you are kissing Rory on your front porch for everyone to see…how could you do that Eddie? Did you really care about Janet, ever in your relationship because I have to tell you that she was in love with you…she was going to tell you but Rory decided to make her appearance instead…and you instead of respecting your girlfriend you let Rory walk in and destroy Janet well with your help of course. That moment Eddie the moment she saw you two kissing…in that moment she knew that your relationship was over, she knew that there was no way around it because if you have truly cared about her you would have told her Rory was here and that you two were together but you did none of those things…so Janet called upon a friend to help her with understanding and alcohol…not the best choice but she was devastated…unfortunately Janet trusted the wrong friend and he took advantage of a very drunk, very emotional girl who had just lost the love of her life to someone who was the one thing Janet would never be…Rooster said all the right things…the things that YOU should have been saying to YOUR GIRLFRIEND but no you were too busy kissing Rory to care what was happening with Janet…did you even think of Janet…did you wonder what someone would think if they saw you two kissing on your front porch…did you think about Janet finding out before you told her what that would do to her…did you think about the fact that she may have been wondering why your phone was off when it is never off or about why you turned your phone off or even in this very small town that someone may have mentioned Rory being back in town to Janet…she does work at the only bar in town after all…to top it all off you turn around and blame it all on her…I mean that has got to be the lowest of the low Eddie…You have a lot of nerve– what you thought after coming clean in the hospital of all the things you did that she was just suppose to say ok Eddie that's fine…the second she saw you two kissing she thought that your relationship was over …she was upset, very drunk and unfortunately in the hands of someone who wasn't acting as her friend but rather of his own selfishness…he should have comforted her not taken advantage of her emotional state…but no you can't see that can you all you see is poor Eddie…oh how he was wronged, well I am here to tell you that what you did was far worse than anything she could have done…and on top of that she told you right away she was honest and regardless of the consequences she told you the truth…lets face it you haven't been that honest with her have you…"

"That is not fair Hannah Jane…I tried to get you to talk about it with both of them…that is not my fault!"

"I have made a lot of mistakes in my life Eddie but that is one I don't have to live with…Janet knew about our little drunken evening 10 years ago after Nick left…I told her when you first started dating I thought she had a right to know…she was upset at first but came to realize that it happened a long time ago and that it shouldn't matter now in your relationship that we all make mistakes it is how we react and handle those mistakes that count…she thought that at some point you would tell her as you began dating but you never did yet another secret you kept from her…I mistakenly thought that in this situation you would have remembered your own mistakes of the past and shown her some compassion and maybe even forgiveness when she told you what she had done since you found yourself at one point having slept with your best friends girlfriend on a night of drunken stupidity on both our parts when Rory dumped you and you were so upset and drunk and I was convinced that Nick was never coming home – that we were both just looking for someone to comfort us but that is obviously not what happened was it Eddie…"

Eddie just sat there and stared at Hannah. He couldn't even argue that point…it seemed like a lifetime ago but she was right…he had made a very similar mistake being drunk and upset he just needed someone to make the pain go away and Hannah was there feeling the same way – it wasn't love just two people reacting to their own broken hearts the difference is Nick never returned until 10 years later so Eddie never had to take responsibility for his actions…but Janet did – she didn't hide it she admitted it right away.

"I told her to go find some place to rot that the captain of the football team is rejecting her and then I told her to get out…well more like screamed it multiple times." he said much softer.

Hannah just looked at Eddie as if someone had just stolen all the air from her lungs as she raised her hand to her mouth. There was nothing more to say. As the tears started to fall from Hannah's eyes, she just shook her head and turned to leave the room. Eddie said, "Hannah if you talk to her…" "No Eddie the best thing that Janet can do for herself is to heal…there is no way I will not let you ever hurt her again…I hope wherever she is that she won't ever have to encounter someone like you again because if I know her it will take her a lifetime to recover from what you have done." With that Hannah left.

Eddie hung his head in shame. Once again the tears came fast and furious however this time it wasn't his own pain that brought them on it was Janet's…and the realization that he is responsible for that pain – that not only had Janet made mistakes but Eddie had too and perhaps his mistakes lead her into another mans arms – a thought that was almost to much to bare…he wasn't alone in his betrayal of Janet and at some point Rooster would have to come to the same realization.

When Hannah reached her car she just sat in the driver's seat for what seemed like hours. She thought, "how could Eddie have said that to her…how could he have used her insecurities against her like that – did he even love her? How could I have possibly sent her into that situation with any kind of hope thinking that he would remember what he had done all those years ago and show any signs of compassion …what she must have felt…"finding some place to rot" what a bastard he is…what is life going to be like without Janet?"

She looked in her purse for her keys and saw that she had a call on her phone. She opened it and listened to the message, "hey Hannah it's me Janet…I know you must be pretty upset with me right now as you are probably aware that I have left the Ridge. I am sorry that I didn't call you to let you know and I am also sorry that I lied to you at the party but I just didn't want to bring you down on your day. I am ok but I need to figure some things out in my life and I realized that I needed to move on from Knight's Ridge in order to do that. I lucked out and am house sitting for this lovely older couple I met when visiting my grandparents. I hope you can respect my wishes because I am not telling anyone where I am. I need to just be by myself for a while…and before the thought enters your mind my grandparents aren't going to say anything as they support my decision. I will check in with you from time to time but my phone will be off the rest of the time but you can leave messages any time you want. I know that I am asking a lot but I hope you can understand and support me – I have just made a complete mess of my life - how did I get so lost…anyway, don't worry about the wedding I will be back for the events and wedding so you will still have your maid of honor by your side…I would never let you down. I love ya Hannah but I think I need to learn how to love myself. Take care, bye"

Hannah closed her phone and said, "love you too my friend" and she headed for home.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

Janet had just arrived in the Edwardson's home town of Hope, MA. It was about an hour away from the nursing home and was absolutely beautiful she thought. It was a town full of historic looking homes and several bed and breakfasts, perfect for the out of town vacationers it seemed. She couldn't help but think that there was some higher power working in this situation as the name of the town was Hope. She hoped that this six months would help her to understand herself better and help her to understand what went so wrong with her relationship with Eddie.

She pulled up to the address that Mrs. Edwardson had written down and could not believe her eyes. The house that stood before her was the most beautiful Victorian house she had ever seen. The yard was landscaped so beautifully with lots of flowers and the greenest shrubs and trees. The house had a porch that seemed to go all the way around. She parked her Jeep in the driveway and walked up to the house. The porch had the most inviting wicker chairs and couches. She could picture herself relaxing on one of the couches reading her favorite book, sipping on an ice tea or better yet her favorite beer. It was as if something lead her to this place.

As she walked through the door the inside of the house was even more spectacular than the outside. The kitchen was huge with marble counters and oak cabinets going all the way to the ceiling but the most eye catching room was the all season room in the back of the house that over looked the garden that Mrs. Edwardson told her about. It also had comfortable chairs and plants. It just felt like she was home. The gardens were so much more beautiful than Mrs. Edwardson could possibly describe. She just couldn't wait to get out there and do some work. She made it her sole mission to make sure that this house and everything that surrounded it would be taken care of to the best of Janet's ability.

Later on in the evening, she sat in the all season's room thinking over her day. She unloaded her Jeep and found an amazing bedroom to call her own. She unpacked her clothes and got the bathroom set up just the way she liked it. It was a busy day and thankfully so as it kept her from thinking about what was really on her mind but now that she was relaxing with a nice hot cup of coffee her mind drifted back to one thing that she couldn't run from, Eddie.

Her heart ached for the loss of her relationship with Eddie. She missed his phone calls and silly text messages. She missed when he would show up after work and spent the evening just hanging out with her at Sully's. She missed when he looked at her and smiled but most of all she missed his arms around her making her feel so safe and secure. The more these thoughts entered into her head, it was as if they were connected to the tears that immediately began to fall from her eyes. How could things have gone so wrong? Why didn't he talk to me that day? Why couldn't he tell me Rory was back? Why did he shut his phone off? Was he unhappy with me? How could I feel so in love with him and not know how he felt about me? More importantly, how could I love him so much and not trust him? Something is just not right with me and it can't just be insecurities…there just has to be more to it…but what?

Janet thought, "I guess this is what grandma was talking about and what I am here to find out…what inside of me always seems to think the worst or maybe it is that I can't trust completely that someone could truly love me…for me."

"I wonder how Eddie is doing…if he is out of the hospital…if he is healing…if he is still angry…how is he going to feel when he finds out that I am gone…is he going to care or maybe he is relieved…he was so angry with me and why wouldn't he be I SLEPT with Rooster…I just don't think I could have faced him again…I will never forget that look in his eyes for the rest of my life…maybe in time I could go back…I just feel so lost…tomorrow is a new day so that is where I need to start."

A few weeks had gone by and Janet felt that she had spent plenty of time in the house getting to know where everything was and had even ventured out into the yard to do some work out there. She really did love this house. She felt more at ease being here in Hope, more at ease than she had felt in a long time if she was being honest with herself. She had met some of the neighbors that came by to meet her after receiving phone calls from the Edwardson's that she would be looking after their house. She felt so welcomed by them and really by every interaction she had with the people she met at the grocery store or the gas station. Oddly enough, she didn't feel like an outsider at all in this very small community she felt more like a welcomed guest. She decided it was time to get out and meet some more people.

She decided to go to the local bar, Big Jim's to have a bite to eat and perhaps a beer. She walked in and found it eerily similar to Sully's, of course the bar was a bit bigger and had a different look to it, it pretty much was the same. She looked around and spotted the regulars that were talking to the bartenders and the others eating and talking with each other. It made her miss Sully that much more. She had struggled with how she left Sully in such a hurry and how he was so understanding but yet looked more sad than angry. She truly felt like that Sully was a part of her family but he was also a part of Eddie's and with all that she had taken from him she felt she couldn't take that too.

She sat on a bar stool and immediately one of the bartenders, well the biggest one, Jim came over and said "let me guess you must be Janet Meadows." Janet was shocked.

"How did you know that?"

"Well for one I am Big Jim I own this place and pretty know most of what happens here in Hope but I also happen to be Mrs. Edwardson's or as we like to call her June's brother. She called to tell us that you would be looking after things at her place and wanted us to make ya feel welcome…I just thought you woulda made it down here sooner than this" Jim said with a big smile.

Janet smiled and laughed, "yeah I have been meaning to get out a bit more but that house is so amazing that I just couldn't leave…and her garden is so beautiful…"

Jim laughed and said, "now I understand why they chose you…I didn't think anyone could love that garden more than my sister but apparently she found someone who could appreciate it just as much. What'll ya have…it is on the house."

"Seriously? Are the people in this town really this nice or will this wear off after a while…I really am enjoying the town of Hope." Janet said.

"Seriously…we take care of our people and you truly seem to be one of us…at least as far as I am concerned…now what would ya like?

Janet ordered a burger and fries and her favorite bottled beer. Her and Jim became the fastest of friends and sat and chatted throughout her meal. She had no idea that she actually spent several hours there because time just flew by. She told Jim that she had worked in a bar in her home town named Sully's so if he ever found himself needing a helping hand to give her a call. Jim simply said, "well I know where to find ya." With that Janet said her goodbyes and headed back to her "new" home.

It wasn't too late when she arrived back so she decided to call Hannah. Hannah nearly screamed when she saw Janet's name come up on the caller ID of her cell phone.

"Oh My God is that really you Janet! I have missed you so much…where are you…what are you doing? Are you ok? Why didn't you tell me what really happened with Eddie? I know I am firing so many questions at you…I'll stop…really Janet how are you…"

"I am ok Hannah. I am sorry that I didn't tell you but it was your engagement party and we were supposed to be celebrating love not crying over something stupid I did…I just couldn't stay there Hannah…I couldn't face him…he was so angry and said the most hurtful things…"

"yeah I know"

"how do you know?' Janet replied a little surprised

"when I hadn't heard from you, I went to your house and saw everything covered and completely panicked so then I went to talk with Sully and he said you quit…he said you told him that you felt like you had to leave…I couldn't understand why you would feel like that…I knew that there was something that I was missing so I went to the one person who could answer that question, Eddie."

"YOU DID WHAT? Hannah, he is already so angry with me…what did you say?"

"Janet, I had a very long talk with Eddie…well it was more of me speaking my mind and telling him exactly what I thought and then he told me what he said to you…I was shocked and stunned…I couldn't even speak…I shook my head and started to cry…I couldn't believe he said those things to you…he seemed a bit surprised by my reaction…I left after that…well I left after saying that you were gone…"

"You told Eddie that I left town? Did he seem…did he care?" Janet replied hesitantly

"You know what Janet…I don't really know what he looked like because after hearing the words I couldn't look at him…I am sure that he cared but Janet I understand why you left and I think that maybe it is a good idea…maybe Eddie is just not the right person for you…you deserve someone who knows what an awesome person you really are and appreciates you…I don't know if Eddie ever really did…I don't know if Eddie is capable of appreciating anything…I think Eddie may have just as many insecurities if not more than you do…maybe some time away from one another would be a good thing…"

"No Hannah I don't think Eddie loved me…I loved him, I love him you know that Hannah but neither one of us was willing to talk about our feelings…I didn't because I was afraid that he would be freaked out and run and he probably didn't because he didn't feel the same way and couldn't tell me…regardless I made the mistake…and you know he will never forgive what I did…look at how he treated Ikey?"

"Janet, I don't think that is it at all…and just for the record Ikey is the one that saved him that nice and broke up the fight or the beating of Eddie and called the ambulance so they are actually speaking again. See so there is hope but I am more concerned about you than Eddie." Hannah replied sadly.

"Hannah I know that you are looking out for me but trust me when I tell you that I am in a very good place, I am safe and I will have lots of time to think about this and hopefully make some sense out of my messed up existence"

"you never did say where you were…"

"I am not planning on it. I know this may sound weird but I feel like I just need to be off the map for a while. I am not telling anyone where I am. I will only have my phone on when I make a call so you will just have to leave messages and I'll return them when I can…I think I just need to take some time away from all of it and figure it out. But I haven't forgotten about you and your wedding so I will continue to work with Emily and will return for the bachelorette party and rehearsal dinner and of course the wedding so please don't think that I am leavin ya hanging because I would never do that."

"I know that Janet and please know that I am here for you if you need me. I really hope you find what you are looking for there so someday you can come back to the Ridge…I don't know if I can live my own life without my best friend being in an undisclosed area…" Hannah smiled.

"I promise you Hannah that I'll always be your best friend but I don't know if I will come back to the Ridge…everything is so confusing and emotional…I just need some time, K?"

"K"

"Well I better get going…take care of yourself Janet…and stay in touch from your off the map location…love ya."

"love ya right back…bye" With that Janet hung up the phone and shut it off. Once again the tears began to fall. "Am I ever going to feel better again…am I doing the right thing…why does this hurt so bad." Janet began to shut off all the lights and headed to her bedroom.

As she has done every night since that horrible day in the hospital, she put Eddie's favorite football Jersey on and curled up in bed, drifting off to sleep with the happy memories of Eddie in her mind. She thought, "tomorrow is another day in this little town called Hope."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

Eddie was sitting on his hospital bed waiting for the doctor to come in and discharge him. He had been in the hospital now for several weeks and was going stir crazy. He was not one just to lay around for any length of time but the doctors told him due to the extensive injuries he had no choice but to lay around until he healed enough to be released to minimal activities. As he sat there he looked out the hospital window and his mind began to wander back to that faithful day when Janet told him of her infidelity. The thought of that day still made him cringe but as it turns out his body wasn't the only thing that was healing. His anger seemed to have lessoned the longer he was in that hospital room. He was unmistakably hurt but now it seemed that part of that hurt came from him and what he said to her that day. As he remembered his conversation with Hannah or rather her speech to him about how he treated Janet that day it became clear to him that he had made some major mistakes that may have caused his girlfriend to fall into the arms of another man. That thought was more than he could bear. He sat and thought about how she must have felt when she was adding up all the things he had done that day and he was starting to see how she could feel like their relationship was in question. How could she not, he thought, "I shut my phone off…I basically blew her off for Rory…and why…why would I do that…I must be some kind of idiot. " But there was one thought that returned to his mind that did make his blood boil and that was Rooster Russo.

"How could he have done that to his so called friend…if he really was her friend he would have comforted her not taken advantage of her and taken her to bed…that he is did selfishly because he has had the hots for her the entire time…any fool could see that…how could he bring her moonshine of all things and listen to her cry over ME and then think to himself hmmm now would be a good time to get her into bed…yeah we have unresolved issues Russo you and I…you had best be aware", he thought.

Eddie hadn't really said anything to anyone really about what happened between him and Janet but it was inevitably when she left town everyone wonders what happened. Owen was the first to bring it up one day when he stopped by the hospital to visit Eddie.

"What goes on Eddie? How are ya feeling?" Owen said.

"Well I'm alright...doc says I'll be better in no time…but no time is taking forever" Eddie smirked

"What goes on with you and Janet? It has been a while since I seen her in Sully's and I heard the other day that she left town…is that true? Why didn't you say something…"

"Well O, how does one say that they told their girlfriend to find someplace to rot after they confessed to sleeping with another man…" the last part Eddie said quieter than the first.

"Come again? There is no way that Janet slept with anyone else…there is just no way…"

"It is a long story O but I made some pretty major mistakes when Rory came to town…Janet saw us kissing and thought we were over and I guess got drunk and ended up sleeping with someone else."

"You kissed Rory…WHAT! You know Eddie you are my best friend but what the hell were you thinking? I don't understand why you would do that…I don't understand why Janet would do that…this is one messed up situation…so where is Janet?" Owen asked

"She moved away…she was so upset by what she did and what I said to her that she felt as though she couldn't stay here in the Ridge…I have no idea where she is, what she is doing or if she is coming back…I have completely screwed up my life O I just don't know what to think or feel anymore. At first I was so pissed, angry, furious and than just sad…I have never cried before in my life like this…I break into tears just thinking of her…I mean when have you ever known me to do that…never!"

"That's because big guy…you were in love with her…because you can only be hurt like that by someone you love…just like me and Allison." As Owen looked down

"What am I going to do O? I never told Janet that…I don't think I realized that I felt that way about her until Rory showed up and when we kissed all I could think of was Janet and how it was her I wanted to be kissing at that very moment…and then when she told me of what she did I completely lost it…it hurt as if I had gotten beaten again…it was then I knew that I loved her…that's great right…good timing for that realization as I am screaming at her to go rot and to go out of my room." Eddie replied sadly

"The one thing I've learned through out this thing with Ikey and Allison is that you have to tell the people you love how you feel…you can't take your relationship for granted…" owen looked away as if in thought and replied suddenly a minute later….

"Who in the hell did she sleep with? No one would have touched her knowing how you would react except for maybe…ahhhhh" suddenly realizing who it would be without Eddie having to answer…"what are you going to go about it."

"I don't know O, I just don't know…"

"Just know Eddie that we got your back…whatever you need…I just hope that if it is at all possible to work it out with Janet that you give it a try because I have never seen you more happy and settled as you were with her…she was your meant to be Eddie I am sure of it." With that Owen patted him on the back, gently.

"Yeah O, I think your right but now I may never have the chance to make things right and that is my fault…why would I tell her to rot – I am such an idiot O."

"Maybe so Eddie, Maybe so" Owen said with a smile

The doctor finally made his way to Eddie's room and signed the discharge papers and sent home a list of strict instructions most of which included more of the same only at home instead of the hospital. That is all Eddie needed was more time to think. Owen dropped Eddie off at 32 Gelson and helped him with all the stuff he had accumulated at the hospital. Phil was so happy to have Eddie home but was surprised that Owen was the one dropping him off. He mouthed to Owen "where's Janet?" to which Owen mouthed back "long story – later". Phil nodded his head in acknowledgement and went inside. Eddie went right up to his room and layed down to take a nap. Oddly enough the trip home did take a toll on him but that was the most activity he had had in almost a month. When he walked into his room, it was pretty much how he had left it. One thing of particular interest was Janet's favorite shirt of his that she always slept in when she stayed at his house. It was laying on his bed where she had left it. A picture of them was on his bedside table and his bathroom was full of her stuff...she insisted one day that she needed her own shampoo, conditioner and all that girlie crap she had at her house…he smiled at the thought…that was a fun night…most nights with Janet were fun if he was being honest. He decided he would lay down for a bit and rest. For some reason he found himself changing his shirt and putting on the shirt that Janet always wore…it stilled smelled like her, he thought. With that he dosed off, thinking of her once again.

When Eddie woke up it was the next day…he thought to himself, "wow those are some drugs…I must have been more tired than I thought." He got up and wondered downstairs to find "the gang" in his house for band practice, he thought "dorks."

Owen was the first to speak, "hey Eddie how you feeling? You look like hell" he smiled.

"Thanks O" Eddie smiled too.

"So we were thinking about maybe going to Sully's for a bit…you in? Feel like getting out of the house?"

"You know what, yeah…I am getting sick of sleeping all the time."

"ok then"

Several hours later, Ikey, Owen, Nick and Eddie were sitting at Sully's in one of the booths. Sully was thrilled to see Eddie back in his bar and showed his appreciation. Eddie on the other hand was happy to be back in the bar but couldn't help but feel like something was missing…something was different…it just didn't bring him to comfort that it once had. He couldn't help but that he would forever feel like something was missing in his life and nothing would feel the same him after her.

As Eddie appeared lost in thought, something snapped him out of it in a hurry and that was the sight of Rooster Russo. His blood began to boil and he became angry instantly. He had some unresolved issues that needed to be addressed and there was one person that needed to be dealt with.

Owen immediately knew exactly what Eddie was thinking as his stare followed Russo's every move. No one else really knew what had happened that night or in the hospital room. Owen was the only one that knew the truth. Nick and Ikey knew better than to pry into Eddie's personal business unless he put it out there. They knew that he was no longer with Janet and that Janet had moved out of Knight's Ridge due to the vast rumor mill that was the Ridge. But neither really knew why.

Owen simply said to Eddie, "you sure now is the time?"

To which Eddie replied "yeah I think so."

Ikey and Nick looked at each other and mouthed "what is going on?"

Owen said "ok I got your back."

Eddie got up and headed right for Russo. Russo saw him right away and didn't know what to do. He figured Eddie wouldn't do much physically because he was still healing from the beating he took and he was bruised in some places still as well as moving slower than he usually did but that didn't mean the look on Eddie's face didn't mean business.

Eddie approached Russo and said "now is a good time for a break don't you like Russo? I'll meet you out back…we have some things to talk about you and me."

Russo started to say no but Eddie shot him a look and he said "ok I'll be right out."

Eddie walked out the front door followed by Owen, who motioned to Nick and Ikey to wait. He made it around back and waited for Russo to come out the back door. He wasn't a stranger to this place as he had met Janet in this very spot so many times to help her "relax" during her breaks.

Russo reluctantly came out the door but didn't move very far away from the door, "what do you want Latekka? I don't have anything to say to you…"

"I bet you don't do you…your such a hypocrite you know that…you were constantly talking in Janet's ear about how bad I was and how I would hurt her…turns out you ended up hurting her the worst…"

"Oh I doubt that…it wasn't me kissing my ex while my girlfriend looked on was it Latekka!"

"No your right about that…but you are the person that Janet trusted…the person that Janet called when she was upset because she needed A FRIEND not someone who would betray her trust, bring her MOONSHINE for God's sake and take advantage of her when she was at her most vulnerable. Tell me this Russo, did you honestly think as she is crying over ME that this would be a great time to get her into bed…yeah that will make HER feel better…yeah that is what friends do right…tell me something else how happy did she look after you rolled off of her…were you happy then…to be the one person to destroyed her chance at happiness with the person she WANTED to be with…were you happy when you found out that she had to quit because she felt that she couldn't stay here in the Ridge…and before you say it it wasn't all about me affecting her decision to leave…did you even think about her at all Russo? "

Rooster just stood there wanting to say something, wanting for that last statement to be totally untrue…"had she really left because of me", he thought.

There were many times in Rooster's life that he if could take back something or change something in his life he would – it would have been that night. Before tonight, it would have been the day that Eddie had asked Janet out. He realized than that he missed his chance with her. Then when Eddie kissed Janet in the middle of Sully's during homecoming weekend in front of everyone he knew with absolute certainty that Janet was head over heels for Eddie and that there was nothing he could do at that point to change her mind about Eddie. Thinking back to that faithful night, he thought that when she called him over after seeing Eddie kiss Rory, he thought this was his one chance to prove to Janet how much he loved her. Somewhere deep inside of him told him that this is not the right time, but when she started to ask him why he loved her and he started to explain he got so caught up in his feelings for her that when she kissed him he couldn't stop himself. He couldn't pull himself away from her because he didn't want to…he really wasn't thinking of her at that point he was only thinking of himself. He justified his actions by saying that he thought they could be together now but he knew deep down she would never have done that if she hadn't been so devastated and drunk as she was that night. When she barely looked at him after they had sex and then how she reacted the next day and even at Hannah's party, he knew he not only ruined their friendship but he had hurt her worse than Eddie ever could because he was responsible for the loss of that relationship – or at least that is how Janet would see it.

As Eddie sat and stared at Rooster as he processed all these things in his head, Eddie knew that not much else needed to be said…he had made his point and judging by Rooster's face he knew there was nothing that he could do to Russo physically that could hurt him more than him realizing how much he had hurt the woman that he was in love with that would not only never return those feelings but now would never return to their friendship and now Russo was…alone.

Rooster was so deep in thought that Eddie just walked away. As if suddenly "coming to" Rooster looked around not realizing that Eddie had gone. Rooster just began to sob. He cried for what he had done, he cried for hurting the one person who had never done anything to him but be his friend and care about him and he cried for the loss of the Ridge as no one would ever see Janet's smile at Sully's or her amazing spirit or heartwarming demeanor. Most of all he cried because Janet felt so betrayed and hurt she could no longer stay in the one place that she called home with the person that she was in love with. He had been the one that had taken all of this away from her. Eddie was right, no beating in the world would match how Rooster felt at this very minute. In fact he would have preferred the beating because those injuries would heal. He feared that how he felt at this very moment – what he had caused his best friend - would never go away.


	6. Chapter 6

(I will be introducing a new character Dwayne, the kick boxing instructor…I envisioned him to be Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson just so you have a visual)

Chapter 6:

Back in the small town of Hope…

Janet was enjoying yet another day working in the yard and in the beautiful garden full of the most vivid and amazing flowers she had ever seen. Mrs. Edwardson tried to tell Janet about the garden and how she had grown all the flowers from little seeds – how these flowers were her pride and joy and one of the hardest things she would have to give up going to the nursing home. To say that Mrs. Edwardson was happy when she found out how much Janet like to work in the garden was an understatement. She screamed so loudly even the hardest of hearing in the nursing home heard her. Janet sat back for a bit and smiled at the memory.

She really did like living in Hope and had made some really nice friends but her mind still went back to the Ridge over and over again. She had moved past the endless nights of crying over that faithful night that Rory returned and she slept with Rooster and then the day that she told Eddie of her betrayal. She still didn't really understand it herself why she would do such a thing. Every time she replayed the scene in her mind she couldn't understand why Rooster let her do that knowing how hurt, upset and drunk she was. "He couldn't possibly have thought that I would have gotten over Eddie that quickly…could he?" She thought. How could he be so cruel as to completely dismiss her feelings for Eddie and take advantage of her emotional state just because he had developed feelings for her that she didn't know existed until the night he kissed her during the "dry run". How could he be my friend and hurt me so badly. How could Eddie dismiss me so easily. Why would he shut his phone off and spend the whole day with her? Did he ever really love me? Was I just so stupid to see that he didn't feel the same way as me?

As she sat there in the sun in the midst of this "field of flowers" all she felt was anger. She was so angry at herself for her overreaction to Eddie's behavior. She was angry at Rooster for being so selfish and thinking only of himself and taking her pain and using it against her to get what he wanted and she was angry at Eddie for making her feel less than important to him – like she wasn't his girlfriend merely just a girl he dated that apparently no longer made him not sad anymore. She just wanted to lash out and hit something she was so angry. Than she remembered this flyer that had been on the bulletin board at Big Jim's for a kick boxing class in town. Janet wasn't necessarily a person who engaged in regular physical fitness but as she sat there and thought about the possibilities she thought that maybe this class would help her to get her aggression out in a productive way as opposed to knocking some random plant around. So it was decided, tomorrow she would check out the class.

Janet walked in to the studio where the class was held. It was a wide open space with several boxing bags hanging from the ceiling spaced out seemingly equally so several people could "box" at the same time. Soon a man came from out of a door to a back room. He said, "can I help you?"

Janet just stood there a second…not sure if she was going to be able to speak. She wasn't quite expecting who was standing in front of her. A tall, handsome, very well built man was in front of her, smiling. She suddenly snapped out of it and said, "ahhh yeah I mean yes I was wondering about the kick boxing class…I saw a flyer at Big Jim's and was wondering if you had any openings in the class."

He stated, "well I think we can squeeze you in…Hi by the way my name is Dwayne and I am the instructor here and owner of this studio."

Janet said, "it's nice to meet you…so what do I need to know about this class."

Before long Dwayne and Janet were going over all the paperwork and rules of the class. He gave her the run down of what to expect and what she would need to bring. He gave her a schedule and she paid the fee. She thought to herself…"this is crazy but I think I am going to like this class." She smiled and said "well I guess that I will see you tomorrow."

Dwayne replied, "ok glad to have you on board."

Janet returned home and there was a note taped to her front door. It was from Big Jim. He asked her to stop down at the bar as he had something to talk with her about and it was kind of important. Worried she went straight to Big Jim's.

When she walked in he saw her right away, "hey Janet thanks for coming down here so quickly. I was hoping to take you up on your offer you made weeks ago about helping me out around here…I had a bartender quit today kind of last minute and I could really use a hand while I look for someone else…what do ya say?"

Janet smiled a big smile and said, "when do I start?"

Big Jim could not have been more pleased…he said, "is tomorrow to soon? Can ya come in in the afternoon around 3 and we'll work out a schedule and you can help me with the dinnertime rush…sound good?"

Janet thought "that will perfect cause my class is at 10 in the morning so I should be able to do both" so she said to Jim, "absolutely I'll see ya at 3 than." With that she headed home once again.

As she said in the all seasons porch on seriously the most comfortable couch she had ever sat in she thought over the events of her day drinking a cup of coffee. She thought, "here I went from having all this free time to a kick boxing in the morning and working at Big Jim's…funny how life works sometimes."

She decided to call Hannah and tell her all about her day and all the new stuff that was happening around her. She finally felt like things were coming together for her a bit and she was feeling a little more in control over her life. Her and Hannah talked for about an hour and Hannah sounded so excited to hear from her. Hannah filled her in on recent wedding updates and things at the Vet's office as well as updates on Sam. He missed his "aunt" Janet very much. They finished their phone call and Janet decided that it was time to watch some TV and for the first time since she arrived in the town of Hope when she went to bed she slept in her PJ's and there was no tears to be seen.

The next morning Janet was a ball of nerves waiting for her class to start. She didn't know if she would be able to do all the things that she would need to but she thought "well how bad could it be really…you kick a bag…I have kicked boxes of alcohol plenty of times at Sully's" and laughed to herself.

Surprisingly there were not a lot of people in the class which put Janet a little more at ease. The class lasted an hour and Janet was surprised at how well she was able to keep up. If she was being honest, she really got into the kicking and punching the bag. Every time she would kick or punch she would think about something that angered her like her insecurities, Rooster, Rory, Eddie, her choices…everything that she felt had gone wrong in her life. By the end of class she felt amazing. Almost as if she could take on anything. Dwayne told her that she had done really well for her first class but would probably be sore so to take it easy for the evening. Janet replied, "no can do…I am helping out at Big Jim's for a while until Jim can hire someone else…I have to be there at 3."

Dwayne just smiled and said, "well maybe see how you feel but most of the time with that level of activity that your muscles aren't used to can cause some soreness…just be aware and take care of yourself."

With that Janet was off.

Janet arrived at Big Jim's at 3pm and was actually feeling pretty good still. She was excited for her place behind the bar once again. It took literally 30 minutes for Jim to explain where everything was located and Janet was off and running. He didn't even need to show her how to use the cash register. He couldn't help but think that where ever she worked before she came to Hope must be missing her something fierce. She was one hell of a bartender.

A few hours into her shift and the dinner crowd was gradually filling into Big Jim's she was in her element. She had everyone's drinks refilled, orders placed and even had a chance to talk to the some of the regulars. She was so efficient that Big Jim actually got to walk around and talk to the patrons, something he rarely got to do. Jim thought to himself, "maybe I'll take my time looking for that replacement."

Janet had a very good evening. As the bar slowed down and Jim was just getting things put away and straightened up he said, "Janet I had no idea what an amazing bartender you were…I can not remember a time when this bar ran as smoothly as it did with you behind the bar. How would you feel if I was to hire you? You can pick your own hours and work as much as you want to…I just don't think I'll find anyone like you."

Janet was so flattered. She just smiled at Big Jim and said, "That would be great. I actually missed being behind the bar…I guess more than I thought…you just let me know what hours you need me for. The only time I need off really is I just signed up for a kick boxing class. It's at 10 am and it lasts about an hour but other than that I am open." Big Jim was thrilled. "We'll sit down and work out a schedule but why don't we call it a night for tonight…here's your tips by the way…turns out our town seems to be quite fond of your skills as well" as he handed Janet $250.

Janet just stood there and was dumbfounded. She couldn't believe that this town embraced her as much as they did in such a short amount of time. She headed home with a very big smile on her face.

The next morning, Janet woke up and Dwayne was right. Just about every muscle was sore. She was thankful that Jim didn't need her in today. She called the studio and told Dwayne not to expect her for class today because she was sore.

Dwayne answered the phone, "Good morning, oh hey Janet…ok, he chuckled, I'll just see ya than on Thursday." He hung up the phone and smiled. "I told ya" he thought.

Janet spent the morning taking a bath and resting. Although every muscle in her body hurt she never had felt better. She began to feel a sense of normalcy and control. She really enjoyed herself at the bar and in the class. She really felt that "kickin" out her aggressions seemed to help as she didn't feel nearly as angry as she did yesterday. She sat and thought "am I ever going to move past all the mistakes I've made. Am I ever going to feel the things my grandma talked about – confident and self assured? Will I ever get Eddie out of my heart?" Once again as so many times before she began to cry and deep down she knew that she could probably do all of the things she put her mind to but she feared the one thing she would never be able to do is stop loving Eddie.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

It had been nearly four months in the town of Hope. Janet was really enjoying her time there. She found herself loving her kicking boxing class as well as working at Big Jim's 4 days a week. She had gotten to know the people of this small town so well since she started bartending again and found that people were very accepting of her. This was evident every time she worked her tips were more than she deserved she thought.

One afternoon Janet decided that she would go visit her grandparents and see the Edwardson's and give them an update on how things were going in Hope.

She arrived within the hour and greeted her grandparents and Mrs. Edwardson at the nursing home. As they all gathered for lunch Janet noticed that Mr. Edwardson was not there. She also noticed that Mrs. Edwardson did not look well, worse in fact then when she saw her last a few months earlier.

Janet said, "I have to tell you Mrs. Edwardson your garden is absolutely beautiful. I have enjoyed spending time in amongst all the beautiful flowers you planted."

"Thank you Janet. It really puts my mind at ease that you are taking such great care of our home and our yard and especially my garden. I spoke to our neighbors and they just could not stop talking about how beautifully you have kept up my home. I just don't know what we would have done with out you being there…" She smiled but began to cough and couldn't finish what she wanted to say.

Janet's grandmother gently patted Mrs. Edwardson's back and seemed to look at her in a way of communicating through their eyes…with slight nods of both of their heads she continued for Mrs. Edwardson.

"Janet, Mrs. Edwardson is not healing quite as the doctors had hoped. Mr. Edwardson is not doing well at all. The doctor feels that they need more time here at the nursing home and may need to stay for quite some time if their symptoms don't improve…so what she wanted to know is if you would be willing to stay there for a longer period of time than just the 6 months." She peered into Janet's eyes not knowing how she would feel about that.

Janet just sat there in shock. She wasn't unhappy for the continued stay in Hope but rather was very worried about Mrs. Edwardson and her husband. Janet looked at both her grandmother and Mrs. Edwardson and said, "You know I would be honored to stay there. I have come to truly enjoy living in Hope. The people have been so great to me, so inviting, warm and friendly. But to be honest I am still working on the things that brought me to Hope in the first place so the extra time would do me good. Please don't worry Mrs. Edwardson I will take good care of everything until you are ready to bring your husband and your self home for good and healthy."

Mrs. Edwardson grabbed Janet's hand…she didn't say anything but tears were streaming down her face. Janet smiled as did Janet's grandmother and she said finally "well then let's eat some lunch."

Janet returned to Hope that evening in time for her shift to start at Big Jim's. The crowd was the usual, neighbors heading in the Big Jim's famous fish but tonight there was a new comer to Big Jim's – well at least since Janet started to work there.

She was about an hour into her shift when she turned around to scan the bar for anyone who needed a drink and there sat Dwayne, her kick boxing instructor. She headed down to where he had just sat down.

"Hey there Dwayne…welcome to Big Jim's…what brings you out tonight?" She said with her characteristic smile and charm.

He stated, "Well I have heard you talk about this place in class and I just had to try this AMAZING fish dinner out for myself." He smiled.

Janet started to laugh a bit and said, "ahhh you were listening to me in between all those orders…kick…punch…kick" as she made the motions with her hands and feet.

He laughed a little back, "yeah I do listen but telling you what to do well that is fun part of the job."

Janet just smiled and said "ok so the famous fish dinner coming right up."

Janet and Dwayne spent the next few hours carrying on a conversation in between her waiting on other customers and getting things cleaned up for Jim. He loved the nights that Janet worked because she was so efficient at her job that he was able to go out and greet his customers and he loved just walking around and talking to people. It seemed as though the townspeople liked that as well because every night that Janet worked seemed busier than the nights she didn't and by now just about everyone knew her schedule.

Dwayne got up to leave and said to Janet, "thanks for opening my eyes to the famous fish dinner from Big Jim's…you know I have lived in this town for nearly 5 years and never came in here…and now I know what I have been missing…that is some good fish!"

Janet smirked, "see I told ya."

Dwayne waved as he turned to leave and said, "now remember tomorrow when we are in class it is back to me telling ya what to do" he laughed and walked out the door. Janet should stood there and shook her head.

Janet got home around 10 pm and was tired. She decided to take a bath and relax a bit before going to bed. She grabbed a glass of wine and headed for the tub. It was so relaxing. Unfortunately that relaxation that she felt just let her mind wonder and it wondered right back to where it always had…Eddie Latekka.

As she lay there with her eyes closed she could see his face…his brown eyes, his sandy brown hair…that flannel shirt. She missed his arms being around her and she missed that feeling when he would walk into Sully's and smile at her…she just missed him. She began to wonder if she had made the right decision leaving the Ridge. Should she have at least tried to talk to him or would he have rejected her again. That she could not have taken. She knew she had made a terrible mistake and trusted someone who clearly did not have her best interest at heart. She knew that she would have never done some thing like that if Rooster had not had his own feelings and emotions working against her.

Rooster…yeah she was still so angry with him. How could she have trusted him? How could he say that he was her friend? But the more she thought of Rooster the more she thought of that day and Rory…the person who brought all of this upon her. The one person that she knew Eddie loved…maybe the only person that Eddie had ever loved. She knew that Eddie must have been feeling something for Rory that day because he wouldn't have kept her presence from her the way he did. She didn't know what he was feeling but she thought it must have been strong for him to turn off his phone and keep that secret from her.

Janet sat there and wondered what would have happened if Rory had not chosen to return to Knight's Ridge. Would she be in Eddie's arms right now? Would he love her? Would they be exactly the same as they were…not really knowing how each other felt? She was in love with Eddie. She wanted to tell him but she was so afraid. She didn't want to lose him but he had never really said anything to her about his feelings, about anything really but more importantly about her. She felt as though he cared but she didn't know anything more than that. How can one person just come back from the past and just completely ruin everything?

So many questions and thoughts…she was overwhelmed yet again. Would this ever get better? Would she ever get over these feelings? Would she ever be able to move on with her life? Would there come a time when she was truly happy with herself as she looked in the mirror or would her mistakes haunt her for the rest of her life?

She got out of the tub and got her most comfortable pajamas on. She went to bed and as she closed her eyes she felt the all too familiar tears form in her eyes.

When she awoke in the morning, she did not feel better as she usually did. She still felt like someone had taken away her will to live. She realized that she had slept later than normal and was going to be late for her kick boxing class if she didn't get moving.

Janet arrived at her class with minutes to spare. Dwayne could tell right away that something seemed off about Janet. She didn't have her sparkling smile as she usually had when she arrived and she didn't say hi as she normally did. During the class, Janet did all the motions and followed the usual instruction but it appeared at times as her heart wasn't in it and than at other times she would kick the bag so hard it almost tipped him over. He hadn't seen that from her before. It was as if she was trying to kick the anger right out of her. Dwayne didn't normally have to much of a relationship with his students other than the typical relationship between an instructor and a student but Janet was different. She was like the sunshine coming in through the window. It was hard not to smile and enjoy yourself in her presence. He decided he would wait until class was over to find out if she was ok because it certainly didn't appear that she was.

Janet was trying really hard to focus but all the emotions of the night before were coursing through her veins. One minute she was so sad and the next so angry. She could not figure out where all this emotion was coming from. It felt as though all of the sudden she was having a breakdown of some sort. She just couldn't figure out what was happening to her.

Just as he planned, after class Janet was finishing up packing up her things and everyone else had left. Dwayne stopped Janet just as she picked up her bag.

"Hey Janet do you have a minute?"

"Ahh Yeah what do you need?"

"I just wanted to talk to you for a minute…you seem to be having a hard day today…do you want to talk about it?" he asked

Janet looked at him a bit confused and then said, "is it that obvious that my life is a total mess?"

"No but it is obvious that you are upset about something and I just thought maybe you might want to talk to someone about it…it sometimes helps to get an outside perspective if you have a problem…"

Janet dropped her bad suddenly and burst into tears. She raised her hands to her face and tried to somehow hide but really couldn't. The tears just came harder and harder almost taking her ability to breathe away. Dwayne walked over to her and lead her to the small table and chair area in the back of the studio where he typically did his paperwork. He helped sit her in a chair and got up to lock the studio door and put the closed sign in the window. He realized that this might take a bit of time and he didn't want her to be interrupted when she so clearly was upset.

Janet looked up and apologized to Dwayne. "I'm sorry I shouldn't be unloading all of this on you…it was nice of you to ask but…"

"Janet, listen to me…I am your friend and you obviously need to talk about this. So lets hear it…come on." He said.

"There is more than one reason why I came to Hope…it wasn't just to watch over the Edwardson's house…that happened to be an opportunity I sort of fell into when I went to visit my grandparents at their nursing home. I lived in Knight's Ridge before I came here. I was dating a man named Eddie Latekka. It is such a long story but basically I misunderstood something that I saw and made a horrible mistake that basically ended my relationship with him. He said some pretty awful things to me when we broke up and I just felt like I couldn't stay there any longer. Trust me when I say I probably deserved everything he said but I just don't know what to do with all these feelings I have. I don't know what to do with what I did or how I handled the situation or how he handled the situation. You see I had never had a relationship with anyone else other than Eddie so I just felt so out of place ya know…"

Dwayne sat there for the next few hours and Janet poured her heart out. She told Dwayne the entire story from beginning to end and gave him all the details – even the ones that she was so not proud of and he sat and listened without judgment. If Janet was being honest with herself, she knew that she needed to talk to someone about it. She did feel better than she had when she walked in. Now she sat there and just waited…waited for Dwayne's response.

Dwayne sat there is awe and could not believe what he had just heard. Could this woman sitting in front of him truly not understand how absolutely amazing she really is. What was this Eddie thinking treating her the way he did. It was simply unbelievable that here she is sitting here in front of him not knowing any of the things that he knew within days of knowing her. What was this Knights Ridge like that they couldn't see Janet…really see her the way that all of the townspeople in Hope did. He remembered back to that night at Big Jim's when he came in to eat dinner. He saw how the people reacted to her and how she treated everyone that she came in contact with. It was clear that she was loved in the small town of Hope. How would he be able to get her to see…

Janet became very nervous as she had no idea why he just stared at his hands for what seemed like hours…though it really was only minutes. She thought to herself, "he probably thinks I am a horrible person for what I did…and why wouldn't he…I can't be trusted…just like Eddie thought" just as Janet was about to get up Dwayne turned to her and spoke.

"Janet I just don't know what to say…I know it will take you a while to believe what I am about to say as I am sure that you have been beating yourself up over this whole situation but Janet you are an amazing woman and in this situation you were put into some very difficult situations that I don't know if most people would have been able to handle better. I truly feel like this Eddie fellow has got to be the dumbest man on the planet for handling his ex girlfriend the way he did. I also think that Rooster was not your friend and in that situation he never should have been the person to comfort you that night knowing the feelings that he had for you. If he was truly your friend he would have found your friend Hannah and taken himself out of that situation because he never liked your relationship with Eddie and he was obviously in love with you himself. As for Rory well that woman knew you were with Eddie and that trip into Sully's was to see if she could rattle your cage so to speak. She knew you were with Eddie but I am guessing it wasn't Eddie that told her. I feel very sorry for Eddie because I can guarantee you Janet that with all this time he has had to think about this whole thing he is suffering right now. He has already realized that he compromised your relationship and I would bet that he is regretting every word he said to you that day in the hospital because deep down he knows he is the one that ruined your relationship. I am not saying this because I know you and consider you a friend, I am saying this because I truly believe it. From the very beginning of your relationship, Eddie has been struggling with what this relationship means and what to do with it. You say that you think Eddie was in love with Rory in high school and then after she left he was a serial womanizer until you came along. From my perspective, Eddie didn't have any more experience in a relationship than it sounds you did. He sure "dated" enough people but he never stayed with any of them so you both were in territory that was new. I don't know if he was the right person for you or not but Janet I think it is a shame that you can't see in yourself what myself and this whole town see's in you…perhaps if you can start to work on that – seeing yourself as being beautiful, wonderful, smart and charming, kind hearted and sincere – maybe than when the next lucky man comes along or if you ever work things out with Eddie – you will be able to see yourself as someone who is worthy of being loved…"

Janet sat there with tears running down her face. She could not believe that Dwayne just said all those things. Some things she always suspected but what he said about Eddie…it just struck a cord in her. Could he really have been just as unsure as she was…were the two of them just too scared to tell each other how they felt or was it just that Eddie had no idea or maybe the relationship with Janet was just more than what he wanted. Either way she found herself starting to feel as if a weight had been lifted from her. As if she had just found a way to forgive herself just a bit for the mistakes she made. She found herself thinking maybe I am worth more than what both Rooster and Eddie were giving me…maybe I am worth a fresh start.

Dwayne leaned down in front of Janet at that moment and took her hands in his and said, "Janet I am truly sorry for what you went through in Knight's Ridge but now you have the opportunity to make your life into what ever or how ever you want to live it…you are a wonderful person and don't ever let another person on this planet ever tell you otherwise…I know this town is better for having you in it…and I knew there was a reason why you were such a good bartender" with that Janet laughed…"now about that kicking you were doing today…I expect to see that again…" Janet laughed again and with that the deep conversation ended and Dwayne said, "Now how do you feel about getting some lunch I'm starving."

With that the once instructor and student became two friends leaving the studio to have a much deserved lunch together.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8:

Back in the Ridge…

Eddie had been out of the hospital for several months now and although his physical injuries seemed to be healed – there were no more signs of bruising or cuts – his injuries that you couldn't see were not healed at all.

Eddie was coming down the stairs of his house when Phil said, "Hey where are you off too?"

"Does it matter?" Eddie said blankly and headed out the front door.

"I guess not" Phil said sighing once again. Phil was so tired of the moods that Eddie seemed to be stuck in…he was either indifferent, sullen or angry. It had been months since he actually saw a smile on Eddie's face, in fact it was before Rory made her appearance back in the Ridge.

Phil decided it was time to call in the Knight's Brigade…just a mere 15 minutes later, Nick, Owen, Ikey and Phil were all sitting in the living room trying to figure out what to do with Eddie.

Nick started, "the way I see it there is nothing we can do…the only person that could help is no where to be found nor do I think that he would talk to her anyway just because of his damn pride."

Phil began, "we have got to do something…it is getting unbearable around here…all he does around here is sulk…hide in his room or make snide comments about relationships…Emily said she is going to stop coming over here if he doesn't snap out of it soon."

Owen thought about what had been said, "I know what your saying but Eddie has a lot on his mind…I don't think that there is anything that we can do…Eddie had his heart broken maybe for the first time and that is something every one has to deal with on their own in their own way."

Ikey looked at Owen like he was crazy, "what you talkin about…Eddie has had that before…remember Rory?"

Owen said, "yes I remember Rory, goofus you don't get it do you…he was in love with Janet and he is just realizing that now…he never really loved Rory that was more teenage hormones talking but what he felt for Janet was real and so was the hurt when they broke up…and now she is gone and he didn't get the chance to even try to work on their problems or fight or anything…he doesn't have any where to go with what he is feeling and that is part of the problem. He said some pretty harsh things to Janet when he was angry, harsh enough for her to feel like she had to leave…he carries that with him too…just give him time…they say time heals all wounds and maybe that is all he has right now."

They all just stared at each other and then at Owen. Nick said, "Since when did you figure all this out?"

Owen looked at Nick and then looked down at his hands and said, "When I felt what he is feeling right now. Just give him time, boys, just give him time." Phil, Nick and Ikey looked at each and Ikey looked down. He knew that part of what Owen was feeling was because of him. He was back with his friends but the sting of his betrayal would stay with him forever.

Eddie found himself back at the place he always seemed to escape too since his world came crashing down months ago. He couldn't stay home because Phil just looked at him with pity or asked him how he was doing, he couldn't go to Sully's because that place just didn't hold the happiness it once did for him and hiding out at BFW wasn't exactly great either so he would go to the one place where he had some of the best times, the happiest times in his life – the one place where he could escape and try to figure out where his life went so terribly wrong…Janet's house.

When Hannah had come to see Eddie in the hospital she told him that Janet was gone he just couldn't wrap his brain around that. He couldn't help but wonder if that was just a lie that Hannah told to make him feel bad or that maybe Janet just wanted to hide out or something. "She wouldn't just leave", he thought.

So when he got out of the hospital, one night he was upset and driving around the Ridge trying to figure out what to do with himself and he decided to test out his theory so he ventured over to her house to see for himself if it really were true. He still had the key that she had given him in his paper bag with the cookies she made for him that morning…the morning that started off so unbelievably amazing and ended with him losing everything. As he did most everyday, he went back to how he reacted that day to all the events that unfolded…why had he not opened that bag before Rory walked back into his life? A question he would never have the answer too. When he did find the key it was way too late, Janet had already slept with Rooster and he had already told her to find some place to rot. Those words still haunting him he decided to use the key to find out if she was really gone.

Nothing could have prepared him for what it felt like when he walked through her front door. It was dark, cold and so quiet. He turned on the lights and suddenly this chill ran throughout his body – what he found was covers on furniture and cob webs in the door frames. It all seemed so wrong…Janet's house was always so warm and inviting and clean…she would never have allowed a cob web to form…this was all just so wrong, he thought. He grabbed a kitchen towel and ran it in the door frames to get rid of the cob webs. He couldn't figure out why he felt the need to do that but somehow it made him feel closer to her. He took the cover off the couch and just sat there, tears forming in his eyes. He knew then that Hannah was right to be angry. Janet was really gone and he knew that what he said to her at the hospital had gone too far. What would he do now? He sat there for the longest time until he decided to go to the one place he never thought he would go to again, her bedroom.

He walked through the doorway and was stunned at how empty it was. The only thing that was there was the bed. At first he pictured the first night that they were together, the laughing, her smile and waking up feeling so happy, and just like that the imagine of Rooster being on top of her filled his mind and he had to close his eyes and turn away.

How could all this have happened? Why did Rory have to come back and completely ruin my life again? Why did I let it happen? Why couldn't she have turned to Hannah? If she had would we be sitting her in her house together instead of me standing here talking to myself? Why did she leave me? Didn't she want to stay and work things out? Would I want that if she stayed? Could I look at her knowing what she did? "AHHHHH" Eddie said out loud. Was he ever going to get over these feelings for her? Would she ever come back to the Ridge? What would I do if she did? His thoughts were just racing with no end in sight. He was so angry with her still but yet he wanted to see her and hear her speak. Even if it was to fight with him he still had this need for her to care about him. He knows that he doesn't deserve any of this with the way he treated her that day and in the hospital but yet after spending so much time thinking about it and about her there was not doubt in his mind that Eddie was in a place that he never wanted to be in again. Wanting something that he may never have, except this time was a million times worse because as it turns out Rory was never what he wanted really – it just took him 10 years to figure that out. It had nothing to do with what the person looked like or how many people were jealous of you or any of that bullshit that he thought before in his life before he realized that Janet was exactly the kind of girl that he wanted. That he deserved. "The one person who would love me for I really am - captain of the football team during homecoming weekend or as a landscaper whose business was ripped from him and lets not forget the bar room fights and womanizing but yet she was always there…no judgment just a drink and a smile…that smile – it would be impossible for anyone not to be happy around that smile. But yet when I wasn't being a great guy she called me on that too…how could I have missed all of this when it seems so clear to me now?" "I was a jackass – I should have told Rory that I was in love with Janet from the start and talked to her about it right away…what was I so afraid of that day? What did I think I was missing out on? Man, if there was ever a time for a do over…"

Eddie shut the lights off and turned to leave. He left the couch uncovered because he knew that this would be the place that he would return to. This would be the place that made him feel safe and would help him to sort out his thoughts and feelings. This would be the place that would hold his secrets because this is the place where he fell in love with Janet and as horrible of a thought as it was this may be the only place that he will ever be able to feel close to her because he knew the longer she was gone the more likely it was that she may never return. That was a place that Eddie dreaded the most.

.

Hannah was standing in her kitchen, baking some cookies for Sam's class, looking out her window at Sam and Dootie playing baseball in the yard. Her mind drifted a bit to Janet and missing her best friend. She had just talked to Janet a few hours earlier and it seemed as though there was something different in her voice this time. Hannah couldn't put her finger on it…she sounded happier than the last time they had spoke. She had been talking a lot lately about her friend, Dwayne who was the kick boxing instructor guy. "I wonder what is going on there" Hannah thought. "Could this be the start of a new romance for Janet? If so would she ever come back to the Ridge?"

If Hannah were being honest with herself she wanted the answer to that question to be yes. Yes to coming back to the Ridge. She missed Janet so much and she felt a bit selfish but she was getting married and it just didn't feel like it should, she thought. Hannah had always relied on Janet to be her voice of reason and lately that voice didn't have much to say. Hannah thought she was doing the right thing by marrying Big Cat but what if she wasn't? Why did she have so many reservations, now of all times with only months before the wedding?

Before she had time to even think about the questions she posed to herself she heard this loud crash and ran into the living room to see what had happened.

"Mom I am so sorry…me and Dootie were just playing ball and I guess I must of hit it to close…" Sam was almost in tears.

Hannah looked at her front window with a very large hole in it and simply looked at Sam and said, "Well it is a good thing we know a window guy…" With that she rubbed his head and started to clean up the glass.

A few hours later, Hannah was standing in front of Nick's desk at BFW. She was explaining what had happened earlier and with a chuckle Nick started to get the order form ready to order her a new window. Eddie was in the back doing inventory and didn't realize someone had come into the shop, let alone it being Hannah. That was until Nick and Hannah started talking…

"So how have you been Hannah Jane…you know expect for the world series of window breaking you had today." Nick said with a smile.

"I have been ok Nick. I'm not gonna lie it has been hard since Janet left. I am trying to be supportive of what she needs right now but it is so hard on all of us. Sam too. Janet was like his Aunt – you know the one that you really like. I just miss her so much and it is driving me crazy not knowing where she is or how to get in touch with her." Hannah replied with a frustrated sigh.

"What do you mean you don't know where she is? You mean to tell me that even you don't know where Janet is? Why can't you just call her…I don't get it?" Nick looked so confused.

"I can call her on her cell phone but it is always off so I leave a message. She calls me when she can but doesn't want anyone to know where she is. I think at first she didn't know where she was going so maybe that was the reason at first but now she is definitely living in a town somewhere. She working in a bar and has been taking kick boxing classes if you can believe that!" Hannah exclaimed.

Nick just looked at her like she was speaking in a foreign language. "What? Kick boxing…are we even talking about the same person?"

Hannah replied, "Oh yeah, I think Janet needed to figure some things out and this class she says helps her deal with her emotions…but if you ask me I think it has more to do with the instructor Dwayne."

This statement definitely caught Eddie's attention as he started listening to the conversation the minute Janet's name came up.

Nick said, "What she has a new boyfriend or something…already…again are we talking about the same Janet here?"

Hannah just looked at him, "Don't be so over dramatic Nick…yes we are talking about the same person and no he isn't her boyfriend, she just has been mentioning him a lot more in the recent conversations that we have had. Janet was devastated when she left the Ridge. Eddie really hurt her. I don't even think he understands quite how much his actions the day that Rory came back affected her. She has made her fair share of mistakes too…a pretty big one in fact after Rory showed up but I think she would have stayed and worked it out with Eddie had he not gotten so angry and basically told her to leave in the hospital. I think she just needed to find a place to go where she could repair the damage of what she caused and what he caused. I really think that she felt she had no choice. She literally only told Sully and left like in the middle of the night kind of move…most of the times I have spoken to her she sounded so alone and down…she likes where she is living now but there has always been a sadness in her voice…lately however that sadness is gone and she sounds I don't know more happy I guess."

Nick just looked at Hannah and really didn't know what to say. Eddie hadn't talked about what happened between Janet and him so he didn't know about any of the things Hannah was talking about. He did know one thing for sure. If Eddie was aware of Hannah's presence he was also listening to every word, so he chose his carefully.

"I don't know what went down with Eddie and Janet but I sure hope that she finds what she needs and comes back to the Ridge – for all our sakes."

Hannah looked at Nick a bit puzzled, "Eddie didn't tell you guys anything?" A little taken a back by this, she continued, "Well I guess Janet was right then, maybe Eddie just didn't care about her the way she did him. She was in love with him Nick but Eddie was just to selfish to see it. When Rory came back to town he practically hid from her. He wouldn't return her phone calls, in fact he shut his phone off all together. He didn't tell her about Rory's visit but Rory was quick to come to Sully's to see Janet. The night was capped off by Rory and Eddie kissing on his front porch for the whole world including Janet to see and that was all she wrote. Janet always knew that Rory was the one person that Eddie loved and just felt as though he was trying in his cowardly way to push her away so he could be with the one person who got away from him 10 years ago. He certainly wasn't doing anything to sway her mind the other way. I just hope that Eddie can find happiness with Rory if that is what he truly wants…."

Suddenly before Hannah could finish her sentence, Eddie came rushing out from the back room and yelling to Nick "I got to run some errands be back later." He dared not look at Hannah as then she would see the tears in his eyes.

Hannah just stood there shocked. She had just assumed Eddie was gone on a job or something. He must have heard the things she said. Not that she cared at all, most of which she had told him in the hospital that day but he didn't know about Dwayne. She wasn't sure if this is something she should tell Janet or what would it hurt for Eddie to know she has a friend. She decided to leave it be and turned to leave.

"Thanks Nick for the window and I ahh I guess I will just talk to ya later than." With that Hannah Jane was gone. Nick sat at the desk not really sure what to do. He knew Eddie was upset but he also knew that Eddie needed room, just like Owen said so that is what Nick decided to do was just give him some room.

Eddie once again ended up at Janet's house. He walked in and went and sat on the couch. He stared at the TV screen that was blank for what seemed like hours but it wasn't. She had met someone else. He was a friend…"well so was I when I started talking to Janet." Now Eddie started talking to himself.

"I can't believe that she has moved on! Does she really think that I didn't care about her? Does she think I am with Rory? If I never see her again it will be too soon!" Eddie remembered back to the last time he saw Rory. She came to see him in the hospital. She was so condescending. "So I heard that you got into some trouble from my visit? Does this mean that you are no longer seeing someone?" Rory said with a slight smile.

Eddie had all he could do to stop himself from leaping out of bed and physically remove her from his room. He said, "Why are you here Rory? Did you come back to ruin the rest of my life because the last 10 years weren't enough?" Rory just looked at him stunned. This was not the response she was expecting.

"What are you talking about Eddie? I didn't ruin anything for you. You chose to keep me a secret as it turns out and Janet a secret from me but you should know that small towns know everything…it didn't take me long to find out who you were seeing especially when you wouldn't tell me yourself…why was that by the way, did you think that I wouldn't believe you or something?" Rory was so confident in her sarcasm.

"You know what Rory you are right, I messed up my relationship with Janet. I was trying to protect her from you because I know how you are and clearly things haven't changed there in 10 years…apparently you learned nothing from your sham of a marriage." Eddie was now full out angry, "see the thing is Rory that I was in love with Janet and you coming back here made me see that…the problem was I didn't tell her that and now I may never get the chance to…so you can just turn right around and see yourself out because as far as I am concerned I don't need to see you for the next 50 years of my life."

Rory just stood there stunned. She did not think the conversation with Eddie today was heading in this direction at all. But in true Rory fashion she replied before she turned to leave, "You know Eddie I was foolish to return to this small town, I thought that maybe you had made something of yourself FINALLY and would be willing to move on but as it turns out you are perfectly happy living a mediocre life here in the Ridge. I guess Janet just fits the bill for that life now doesn't she."

Eddie was so angry he began throwing things around the room until the nurse came in and sedated him. Eddie cringed at that memory. As he sat on Janet's couch, he realized just what an ass he made of himself that day. He would give anything to see her right now. He would get in his car and drive to her if he knew where she was just to shake some sense in her. No matter how angry he was at her infidelity his love for her seemed to be stronger but inside he could feel her slipping away from him just as Hannah could, even though she wouldn't come right out and say it.

Hannah was right about one thing, Eddie thought. They both had made mistakes in their relationship but Janet always owned up to hers, if Eddie had she might still be here now but now he has to live with that regret for the rest of his life. He sat there and thought, "If I ever get the chance again with Janet, I swear to you God right now that I won't make those mistakes again. No more self doubt, no more uncertainty, no more wondering if this is really what I want…if she ever comes home I promise you she will know how I feel and I won't let her slip through my fingers again." He closed his eyes and let the tears fall yet again, in only place he felt safe to let it out.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9:

Janet was enjoying her day off. Dwayne had called earlier in the day and had to cancel class. He didn't exactly explain why but since Janet has gotten to know him a little better she took it on good faith that he had a good reason.

She didn't have to work in the bar so she decided to spend some time in the garden. She loved being in amongst all the flowers. She had to admit to herself that she was feeling better and better everyday. Dwayne had been right. Talking about what happened in the Ridge and talking it all out really did help. His perspective on the events that took place helped as well. Janet was a bit surprised and relieved to find that Dwayne had not judged her for what she did to Eddie. He didn't support the decision either but what he did do was offer a different look at what the bigger picture was. If she was being honest with herself, she had been harder on herself than anyone ever could. She knew at some point she would have to face her past mistakes and deal with the consequences of her actions, namely Eddie and Rooster at some point. His betrayal of their friendship seemed so much worse than she had originally thought and listening to Dwayne's version of how Rooster should have handled that situation definitely was further evidence of what she already knew, Rooster truly wasn't her friend and helped her make a devastating choice that she would not have made under other circumstances. She never saw herself as a cheater really but now that is all she saw well that was until Dwayne helped her see some things more clearly.

As she walked amongst the flowers, she thought about all the conversations that she had had with Dwayne since that day, the day of her "breakdown". It seemed to Janet that somehow he was brought into her life to help her find herself as strange as that seemed. His friendship had come to mean a lot to her. She had to admit to herself that she was starting to see herself differently as well. She truly felt more comfortable with herself and didn't seem to second guess herself very much at all living in Hope. If someone told her she looked nice or that it was good to see her, she never thought twice about it. In the Ridge she always wondered why they would say something like that. It made her start to wonder what went so wrong for her there that she felt so self conscious and insecure. Perhaps it was the same for Eddie, always having to live up to a standard that was set by one play in a football game when he was merely a teenager. Janet thought, Could they both have been living for others and not for themselves…could that have been the problem all along?

She definitely was feeling much stronger and more confident. If the time came that she needed to return to the Ridge she felt as though now she was much more prepared for her life there, but what would it be like living in the same town as Eddie. Although she made great strides in herself and how she felt about herself there was still that part of her heart that she thought would always belong to him. It was as her grandmother said, "the first love sometimes is just that, not meant to stay but meant to be experienced." Was that what Eddie was to her now, just her first love. Would she find it again? She often wondered how Eddie was doing now. Was he dating Rory? Was he happy? She had never brought herself to ask Hannah about him partly because she was afraid of the answer and partly because she didn't want to hear about how happy he was with someone else, especially Rory. Her heart seemed positive that he was with Rory although she didn't know that she just felt it.

Later that day, she was relaxing on the couch on the front porch, engrossed in her most recently acquired favorite book when someone had just come up the front steps. She looked up from her book to find Dwayne standing there with a big smile on his face.

He had never come over to her house before so she was a bit surprised.

"Hey there stranger, what brings you by? I was worried about you earlier when you called to cancel class", Janet said.

Dwayne looked down a bit and than said, "I know I am sorry about that…I had something come up that I wasn't expecting. I was heading in this direction and just thought I would stop by and see this amazing garden you talk about all the time…I hope you don't mind me just stopping by like this?"

Janet just looked at him and smiled, "Absolutely not! You are welcome here anytime and especially if I get the chance to show off my, well not so much mine as I am caring for, garden. I was just working on it earlier today. It is beautiful. Come on back I'll show ya." With that the two friends headed back to the garden and spent a few hours walking around the garden, the yard and toured the home.

Dwayne was absolutely amazed at the flowers in the garden. The variety and how well kept it was. He knew that was all Janet although she wouldn't admit it. The yard was immaculate and the house was the most amazing Victorian house he had seen in a while. He now understood why on certain days she would talk non stop about this home and the gardens. He could see it made her very happy to see the results of her hard work.

Janet asked Dwayne as they were sitting back on the front porch, "Hey would you like to stay for dinner? It has been a long time since I got to cook for someone else and I would love the excuse…not much fun cooking all day just for me."

Dwayne sat there and thought about what he would say. He would love to stay as he thought "she is probably as good of a cook as she is with everything else…" but is it a good idea. He had never gotten this close to another student of his ever and he was starting to question why. He started to think of all the times he spent with Janet, especially recently since their talk when he found out about Janet's past. He found himself enjoying himself more and more every time they hung out…be it at the bar or class or maybe going for a bike ride or whatever they did, he truly enjoyed himself. He knew this was dangerous territory for him to be in because he himself had a pretty big secret that kept him at arms length from most people. He never allowed himself to get to close to anyone really because he knew at some point this secret would come out and he just couldn't stand to hurt anyone else with it, especially Janet but why is it that he just couldn't say no to her.

Janet looked at Dwayne so obviously deep in thought, 'Hey if your busy that is ok, we can do that some other night…it is no big deal really."

Dwayne looked up quickly as if she had just snapped him out of his thoughts. "Sorry about that my mind wonders sometimes…apparently it happened again…I would love to stay…what are ya making?" And like many times before Dwayne decided to act as he always had and go back to being the person who she was used to.

Dinner was amazing just as he suspected and they were now sitting in the all season's porch with the garden lights on just looking out into the back yard. The evening was a bit cool but being in the all season's porch they were quite comfortable. Dwayne spoke first, "man how do you go anywhere living here…this place is just amazing and so comfortable…I may want to take this couch home with me" he chuckled a bit.

Janet just kept staring into the garden, "Yeah I know what you mean, but without contact with people I think I may turn into the town crazy lady" she motioned with her fingers circling her head and laughed.

"I don't think it is possible for you to be crazy…everyone here likes you way too much for that. I have never seen Big Jim's busier than the nights you work – you do realize that Jim will cry openly if you ever leave this town." Dwayne said smirking.

Janet said, "I don't know about that but I do enjoy working there. It has been amazing getting to know everyone here in town. I just wish people were more like this in the Ridge. I was just thinking today about where my life "went wrong" so to speak there and how I just don't feel those same things here. I think it is just strange how these total strangers have just accepted me without question or comments…just open arms…I guess I am just not used to that."

Dwayne thought for a second on what he wanted to say. He had known Janet now for nearly 7 months and he just couldn't figure out what these people were like in the Ridge – how is it possible for what she is saying to be true. He knew right then that he himself was feeling something more than he should for her. He promised himself that he would not involve himself with another person but she was just someone that he could not stop thinking about when he wasn't with her and when he was it felt more powerful than a friendship. He didn't want to risk losing her friendship but he knew that he wanted more and against his better judgment he was going to let her know.

He said, "Janet how would you feel about going out with me, on a date?"

Janet turned her head so fast she thought for sure she could have gotten whiplash. "umm what did you just say?" She thought for sure he hadn't heard him correctly.

"I know that this seems like it is coming out of left field but I just can't stop thinking about you when I am not with you. I have really enjoyed spending time with you but lately it seems as though my feelings are not ones of friendship. I want to be able to hold her hand, kiss you, hold you and I am pretty sure that friends don't do that so what do you think about that?" He was so nervous but not ready to give up.

Janet seriously thought she was mistaken but what she heard but then he says he wants to kiss her and she definitely heard that. Truth be told she had her moments as well thinking of him in ways that went beyond friendship but she had no idea he would feel the same way. She had never really seen him with anyone or heard him talk about anyone special so she just assumed he kept to himself and just wasn't a dating kind of person. Those familiar butterflies were going wild in her stomach and she realized that she hadn't answered him as of yet.

She stated, "Yes I would actually love to go out with you. I had no idea you felt that way, you are good at hiding it but trust me when I tell you that the feeling is mutual." She looked up slightly with that smile, raised eye brow and half cocked head. He loved that look. That was look that held all the possibilities in his mind.

Dwayne got up from where he was sitting and made his move towards her. He sat down very closely to her and said, "great" with that he closed in and kissed her on the lips ever so slightly. And that is how it started, a small kiss that turned into a bigger one that turned into an evening filled with kissing, touching and holding.

Dwayne left Janet's house a few hours later and she just stood in the doorway and watched him walk away. She was mesmerized by him. She was not very experienced that is for sure but she had never felt such confidence in someone's feelings for her before. When she began dating Eddie he was so ambivalent and unsure if she was what he really wanted. There was none of that here. Dwayne seemed to know exactly what he wanted and was not afraid to let her know it either. She wondered what tomorrow would bring as she had class in the morning. Would it be awkward or would he be just as he was tonight. The one thing she was sure of she was excited to find out.

Dwayne arrived home and couldn't help but smile. Being with Janet tonight, just moving their relationship to that next step that next level he could not be happier. He couldn't wait for the next day as he knew he would see her in class and could not wait to share how he felt with the rest of Hope. The one thing in the back of his mind was bugging him though. "At some point I am going to have to tell her the truth about me and I am not sure how she will react to that. I am being very unfair to her putting her in this position I know I am but yet I can't help how I feel. I just hope one day she will be able to forgive me" he thought.

The next morning Janet awoke and she was both excited and nervous. She couldn't wait to get to class to see Dwayne but what if he didn't react the same, "well I guess there is one way to find out" she thought as she left for class.

Dwayne had arrived at the studio early. He was so excited and nervous to see Janet. He just knew that he would not be able to restrain himself when he saw her. He thought he would wait until after class but knowing how he was feeling he didn't think he would be able to. He only hoped she got there early so he could spend some time with her before the other students got there, and his wish came true as Janet was the first to arrive.

Janet walked in and saw Dwayne right away. She smiled at him and as the door began to close behind her Dwayne was in front of her, grabbed her gently and kissed her with such passion, her knees almost buckled. She lost all thoughts that were in her head at that point and just enjoyed the feeling of his arms around her and his lips on hers. They stayed that way for a few minutes until either of them were able to breath any longer. Dwayne stepped back slightly only releasing his lips from hers not his grip on her body. He had the biggest smile on his face. "Morning, Janet. It is good to see you."

Janet had to get her bearings a bit still as she wasn't quite expecting that from him. She soon responded, "It is really good to see you too." They had a moment of eye contact that didn't really require words and then the other students began to filter into the studio. He didn't release her right away so the other students saw the exchange between them and started to make comments of course. She just smiled and he finally let her go to announce that class was starting.

That was the best class she had to date. She did well and there was just this feeling between them. They would look at each other and it was unlike anything she had ever experienced. He clearly didn't care who saw what he was doing or that he had any reservations as to what he was doing. She felt completely cherished by him in that class and every interaction they had after that.

Janet also had to work that night at Big Jim's so Dwayne decided to go to the bar and have some dinner so he could spend some time with the girl he was dating. He was fine with thinking of Janet as his girlfriend but since they had just started to "date" he thought perhaps that conversation would need to take place after actually going out for a while…well that is unless she is ok with that too. He decided to feel her out at dinner and see where her mind was at.

Janet had left the studio after much more kissing and hugging after class. She felt like a teenager with the way they were carrying on with each other. It was as if he could not get enough of her. He wasn't pushing her into anything more but the kissing was seriously amazing, she thought. She told him that she had to work later on that night and he told her he would see her later. She felt as though every one in town could see how happy she was as she was sure her smile was a mile wide.

She arrived at Big Jim's and was getting ready for her shift. Jim looked at her and said, "what is going on with you. You appear to be glowing there little lady." She once again smiled for like the 100th time that day.

Janet said, "Well it seems that Dwayne and I have decided to be a bit more than just friends and I gotta say I am just really happy about it."

"Yeah I can tell" Jim said with a smile " I think that is just great Janet but that is no surprise to me…I could tell that boy had something for you when he came in here the first time…that boy would not set foot in this place before you got here…something brought him in here and I am sure it wasn't the fish." Jim just shook his head.

Janet sat and thought for a second. He did say that he hadn't been there before but they were just friends than really. Not even close friends at the time. Jim was probably just reading into that more than he should, she thought.

A few hours later, Dwayne walked in and found his seat that had somehow become his seat when she was working. He had been in there many times over the course of their friendship to eat or just sit and chat with Janet. Truth be told, he knew even then it still wasn't the fish that brought him into Big Jim's.

"Hey" she said as she walked up to where he had just sat down.

Dwayne got up and walked around to the open section of the bar and gave Janet a rather memorable kiss and said, "hey yourself." Just as casually he returned to his seat and left Janet standing there with all eyes on her. Her mind was spinning. Was it possible to feel all she was feeling in a mere 24 hours? She could not believe that he had just kissed her in the middle of the bar during the busy evening dinner hour and just casually walked back to his seat as though he had done this before with her.

After a few seconds she came back to her senses, and dealt with a few comments by the regulars and walked over to Dwayne and said quietly, "you really are amazing you know that right?" she smiled the biggest smile that Dwayne knew that there was no where else in the world that he wanted to be right then right there.

Through their time talking in between her waiting on customers he would rub her hands or hold them for brief periods of time. He was always touching her in some way when they were together. She felt so cared for and for the first time, she felt what it must feel like to be desired by someone. She had felt that way with Eddie at times but not with such confidence and strength as she felt it with Dwayne. Eddie always felt like he was holding something back or that every situation was a choice for him. Dwayne was not like that at all. He clearly knew what he wanted and what he wanted was her.

Soon after they started dating, every one knew they were together. When they were together, Dwayne made it known that he was with Janet and happy about it. The townspeople just smiled when they saw the two of them because they could see the love that was forming between the two. It had been about a month after they started dating when they came back to Janet's house after having a nice dinner in a neighboring town.. They were relaxing on the couch in the all season's porch and looking off into the gardens as they often did. Dwayne was the first to speak.

"Janet there is something that I wanted to talk to you about…don't be alarmed it isn't a bad thing or at least I hope that you don't think it is but I was wondering if we could talk about us for a bit."

Janet turned quickly to look at him as if he was ready to burst the wonderful bubble she had been living in. "ok what did you want to talk about…is everything ok between us?" her look was one of worry.

Dwayne quickly put her mind at ease, smiled and said, "everything is great between us that is what I wanted to talk to you about…I was wondering if it is ok for me to think of and refer to you as my girlfriend. I know that we have only been together, well dating for about a month but I am sure that you are the one that I want to be with but I wanted to talk to you about it to see what your thoughts are."

Janet had stopped breathing and realized this fact so she quickly started breathing again and looked at him with tears in her eyes, "Yeah that would be nice." That was all that was said for the rest of the evening between Dwayne and Janet as they became a couple in mind, body and spirit that night.

Janet awoke the next morning and could not believe what had happened. Dwayne was lying beside her with his arms still around her wrapped tight. She smiled and snuggled in closer. As she moved, Dwayne awoke and the same smile crossed over his face. He opened his eyes and looked over at Janet. They smiled at each other at that moment and nothing more was said as they began to enjoy each yet again.

Dwayne laid there for a moment after they had finished waking up properly and felt as though he was the luckiest man alive but his secret was still looming over his head. He knew he would have to tell her soon but how could he do that to her. He knew she would be so upset and he couldn't blame her, he would have to leave her at some point – he had no choice – he would sell his soul to the devil if he could but that wasn't an option for him – there was no option for him. Was he being selfish for wanting to be happy before he was gone? Would she ever forgive him when he was gone? Right now he couldn't think about that. All he could think about was her and how happy he was being in her arms…for now that had to be enough as his reality would have to wait.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10:

Things in Janet's life were really good right now. She had this amazing new relationship that she never expected and was feeling so strong and so self confident she hardly recognized herself in the mirror. For her, she felt as though she had accomplished some of what she came to do, put the past behind her and begin to love herself for just the person that she was. Although she wasn't looking for it, she also found someone whom she was growing to love and that she was sure loved her in return. She decided to talk to Dwayne about returning to the Ridge for Hannah's wedding.

Janet had phoned Hannah and she picked up right away. "Oh my God I am so glad you called" Hannah practically shouted into the phone. Janet just laughed a bit and said "ok what is going on now? What crisis do I need to avert?" Hannah could hardly believe her ears. This was not the Janet she was used to, this was a new Janet.

"So tell me what is going on in that mystery place you live…I hardly recognize your voice you are so cheerful." Hannah smiled.

"I have quite a bit to be happy about but mostly I feel good Hannah. I can't wait to see ya but there is one thing I need to ask you first…can I bring someone with me to the wedding?" Janet was waiting for the obvious interrogation that would be next.

Hannah sat there not expecting this line of questioning at all, "Ahhh well yeah it is ok but are you going to tell me who this person is and why are you bringing this person to a wedding…I sense there is more to your happiness than feeling good Ms. Meadows…now talk."

"I will tell you every thing when I get there for the bachelorette party I promise but I need to ask Dwayne before I leave so can I please bring a date, please?" Janet was feeling uneasy. She knew that bringing Dwayne may be risky but she wasn't ready to face Eddie with Rory alone, if he chose to go at all. She was finally happy in her life again and Dwayne was a big part of that. She wanted to show him Knights Ridge.

"I have no problem with you bringing Dwayne at all but you told me he was your friend, what's with the "date" lingo…am I missing something?" Hannah was trying to find out what was really going on.

"Things have changed a bit from the last time I talked to you Hannah…Dwayne is my boyfriend. We have been dating for a few months now and I am happy. I promise you we will talk when I get back…he is only coming for the wedding so we will have plenty of time. I plan to arrive on Wednesday so I have all day to prepare for Thursday's bachelorette party, Fridays the rehearsal dinner and Saturday is the wedding so everything is covered. He will be coming on Saturday morning since he still has classes to teach during the week." Janet was nervous about returning but she was counting on being very busy.

"Ok Janet I will see you Wednesday night then. I will stop by the house and make sure everything is ready for you and Dwayne. Thanks for coming back Janet I know that this will be hard for you but I am so happy that you will be by my side." Hannah smiled at the thought of Janet but still had this nagging feeling that Saturday was not going to go as well as she had hoped.

That night Janet and Dwayne were cleaning up the dishes after dinner and Janet decided now was a great time to ask him if he would go to the wedding with her.

"So you remember that Hannah's wedding is coming up right? I am leaving on Wednesday night to get ready for her bachelorette party on Thursday, rehearsal dinner on Friday and then the wedding is on Saturday so I was thinking…."

"Would you like me to come with you to the wedding? Because if that is the question, you didn't even have to ask." Dwayne was smiling.

Janet just stood there and smiled. How is it possible to be dating someone who doesn't have to be convinced to go anywhere with her…he just seemed so happy just to be with her. Why did this relationship seem to good to be true?

Dwayne interrupted her thoughts, "that was what you were going to ask me wasn't it?"

"Yes, Yes it was…I'm sorry I am just so happy…how are you even possible?" Janet just shook her head and looked up to find Dwayne within inches of her lips.

"I am possible because of the woman that is standing in front of me." With that he began kissing Janet and the rest of the dishes would just have to wait until the morning.

The day had finally come and Janet was getting ready to head to Knight's Ridge…the first time in many, many months. Dwayne had sensed that she was apprehensive about the trip. He said to her, "I'll see you on Saturday bright and early. You have given me every thing I need so just go and have fun. I promise you every thing will be ok." Janet looked at Dwayne and said her goodbyes with the promise to see him on Saturday.

She arrived at her house in the Ridge in the early hours of the evening on Wednesday night. She walked into her house and couldn't believe how clean it was. Not all the furniture had been uncovered but some pieces were. She was grateful to Hannah for helping her out. She felt a little strange being there after all this time. Every thing was still in it's place but yet everything seemed out of place. She walked into her bedroom and it felt so strange to her…almost like she was walking into someone else's house. She barely remembered what had happened there last but the memories of Eddie were still very strong. She started putting her clothes away in the dresser and hanging up her dresses for the upcoming events and realized that some of Eddie's things were still there. She hadn't thought to return them and he obviously never used the key that she had given him that faithful day. They seemed so out of place now. Maybe she was the one who was out of place now. She wasn't sure but she knew that this would be a busy weekend so she got herself settled in and went to sleep for the night.

Eddie hadn't realized that Hannah's wedding was this coming weekend. Why would he, it wasn't like he was planning on attending the event. He couldn't stand Big Cat and Hannah was not so fond of him either these days. He made the trip to Janet's house as he had done so many times in the past except this time, her driveway wasn't empty and her lights were on. As he pulled up along side the road and stared at the house, he saw the shadow moving about and knew right away that it was Janet. He didn't know what to do. Should he go and talk to her, should he wait and run into her naturally – so many things were running through his mind. He felt hopeful for the first time in a long time. As he sat there, waiting to see her more clearly through a window, he thought maybe now wasn't the right time. They haven't seen each other in more than 7 months and she obviously had just gotten here. He decided to wait until tomorrow as he was sure if she was here in the Ridge Hannah's wedding must be this weekend. They would most likely be at Sully's tomorrow anyway. Just as he was about to pull away, that is when he saw her, through her kitchen window. She had dropped something in the sink it looked like and she just stopped and looked out the window. She looked like she was deep in thought. As she stared out the window and up at the sky she smiled. God, how he missed that smile. But just like that she turned and was gone from the window and shutting off the lights. Yup, tomorrow it would have to be. "Looks like I won't be getting much sleep tonight." He thought.

Hannah arrived at Janet's house early in the morning. She was so excited to see her best friend. Janet was awake and just finishing up getting ready when the door bell rang. She looked out the window and saw Hannah's car and practically ran to the door and flung it open. The two friends screamed and grabbed each other in a huge hug!

"Oh my god, Janet you look amazing! I have missed you so much!" Hannah was starting to get teary eyed.

"I have missed you too…are you ready for your big night? Emily and I have got some big surprises for you so I hope you are ready…Oh my God your getting married!" Both girls screamed again and settled into Janet's house for some old fashioned girls gossip.

Eddie was at home lying in his bed. He just wasn't sure how he felt today. Everything seemed different now that he knew Janet was back in the Ridge. He didn't seem to be as excited this morning with the possibility of seeing her as he was last night and could not figure out why. There was something in his stomach that was just unsettled and he really couldn't pin point it. He always thought that he would be so happy to see her that nothing else would matter but something was just not right. He would have to wait and see what happened tonight to help him to figure out what the problem was that he was sensing.

The girls all gathered at Hannah's house and there was a definite excitement in the air. Everyone was so happy to see Janet that this night could not have been more perfect. They started with a dinner out of town a bit to kick off the evening. Everyone seemed very focused on Janet and what had been happening in her life. There was definitely something different about her everyone could tell. She seemed so happy and confident. She beamed about her town and the people in it but most of all she talked about her new love Dwayne. Everyone sitting at that table could see on her face that she was in love and so happy but there was still this feeling that somehow the person she should be talking about was Eddie and not this Dwayne but everyone sitting there had been through most of the relationship issues with Janet and Eddie so no one questioned her new life or her new boyfriend Dwayne. They were mostly just happy for her.

As the girls made their way to Sully's, Eddie was a nervous wreck. He was at Sully's with Owen and could hardly take his eyes off the door. He knew that they all would come bursting through the door at any second and he would see Janet face to face for the first time in nearly 8 months. What would he say? What would she say? So many things running through his mind that he got lost for a second in his thoughts when this loud noise brought him back to the present. The loud noise was a group of slightly drunk women celebrating a friends marriage.

Janet, Emily, Allison, Aubrey, Hannah and several of Hannah's co workers from the Vet's office had just come through the door. Sully's being their last stop on an evening that was well underway. Sully was so happy to see Janet he nearly took her breath away he hugged her so hard. She was so happy to be in Sully's again. She looked around a bit and just took in the sights. She had missed this bar and the people in it. She was having such a good time. She worried a little about Eddie being there but so far she hadn't seen him and no one really mentioned him. She thought everyone was being nice and avoiding the topic because he was already with someone else, probably Rory and they didn't want to hurt her feelings. That is what she thought at least. She wondered what she would say to him if she saw him…would he be happy to see her? Would he yell at her again or be mean? She had hoped that time would heal all wounds but sometimes maybe there are just some things that can't be healed, she thought. Regardless of all of that, she was happy to be home.

Eddie was staring at her, once again mesmerized by her smile. It was as if he couldn't move any closer for risk that all of this wasn't really happening. He thought she looked amazing. There was just something a little different about her. Maybe it was the way she carried herself or maybe it was just that he had really missed her. Whatever it was she looked good to him. He was about to get up and finally go to talk with her when something captured the attention of the crowd and his gaze turned to see what it was.

Janet was standing with her back to the door in a circle of giggling, slightly intoxicated girls talking about boys when she felt these hands go around her waist…she couldn't figure out who would be doing that and she could see all the girls with huge looks of confusion and then big smiles go across their faces…

Dwayne decided to surprise Janet by coming to the Ridge a little earlier than scheduled. He walked into Sully's and since he was definitely a man out of place there and quite a large man at that, naturally people started to pay close attention. He spotted the huge group of girls and then Janet so he sneaked up behind Janet and winked at the girls with a "shhh" motion with his finger and then slowly wrapped his arms around her. He was considerably taller than her so his presence did not go unnoticed by anyone in the bar especially Eddie.

Janet turned around to find Dwayne and she literally screamed and jumped up into his arms. Dwayne set her back down and kissed her as if they had been apart for months. Janet sort of forgot all about everything else and only had Dwayne in her mind until they pulled apart from each other and looked into each others eyes just for a brief second before Hannah brought them back to reality.

"So this must be Dwayne…or at least I am hoping so." Hannah chuckled and the girls eyes were completely glued to Dwayne.

"Hi, you must be Hannah. Congratulations on your upcoming marriage. Who ever he is he is one lucky man." Dwayne said ever so charmingly.

Janet turned to face the girls again and Dwayne stood behind her with his arms wrapped around her tightly. Janet was beaming with happiness anyone could see that, everyone including Eddie. Owen began to worry as Eddie hadn't moved since Dwayne walked in and Eddie had this look on his face that Owen had never seen before, ever.

Eddie could not believe what he was seeing. Who was this guy? What is happening here? She has moved on with someone else? How is that possible? Look at her, she seems so…happy. This just can't be happening.

Eddie remained planted in the booth that he and Owen had been sitting in. He could continue to watch her but she didn't seem to know he was there. She remained at Dwayne's side unless going to the bathroom or dancing with the girls. Eddie felt as though someone had beaten him all over again. He had been waiting for this chance for so long but he never dreamed that Janet would find someone else. He felt like such an ass for thinking that all of a sudden. That type of thinking is what got him in this mess in the first place. He always underestimated Janet's ability to connect with other people and somehow thought she was just for him. How could he be so naïve to think someone else wouldn't see all the amazing things about her just as he had but clearly this guy knew exactly what he had and wasn't making any bones about it.

Once the evening began to wind down, Eddie made his way to the bar for one last drink after going to the bathroom. He waited until the girls were over in the corner attempting to play darts but really looked like a bunch of laughing girls just picking up sticks…no one was actually hitting the dart board at this point.

He approached the bar and found himself right next to this strange fellow. Dwayne turned slightly and saw Eddie approach. Janet had described Eddie once to him back in the beginning of their friendship when she suffered her "breakdown" so to speak so he recognized Eddie right away. He could tell that Eddie was intrigued by him and knew nothing of him really. Dwayne thought about what to say. Deep down he knew that when he was gone, his hope was that Janet could find her way back to this man who he was sure still loved her even though Janet never knew if he ever had.

Dwayne decided to speak first. "You must be Eddie, I'm Dwayne" with that he extended his hand for a handshake.

Eddie was clearly taken aback. "ahh yeah how exactly do you know that" apprehensively shaking this guys hand.

"Janet has told me a lot about you" Dwayne said cautiously.

"oh, so how do you know Janet?" Eddie was going to figure this guy out.

"Her and I met about 8 months ago, I teach kick boxing classes and she started out as one of my students." Dwayne didn't want to give too much away.

Eddie suddenly remembered Hannah's talk with Nick and she had mentioned this friend of Janet's named Dwayne. It was all making sense now. The story sounded familiar to him. He befriended Janet and when he got to know her he knew that she was worth so much more than a mere friendship could provide. Eddie suddenly just felt sad. He felt sad for letting this amazing person slip through his fingers when he knew what it was like to be just as happy as this guy because he had the one thing Eddie wanted but clearly was never going to have again.

Dwayne recognized that look and knew he had been right about Eddie and his feelings for Janet. He said, "It was nice to meet you Eddie. Janet is an amazing woman although I am pretty sure I don't have to tell you that. I know that this may sound strange coming from me but don't loose sight of how you feel about her, you never know when something feels so lost, in the end it really isn't." He patted Eddie on the back a bit and walked away towards Janet.

Eddie was just speechless. He didn't know what to say. What did he mean by that? All of this was just too much for him. He couldn't see Janet now. He couldn't stand being there anymore. He just turned and left abruptly. Owen tried to follow after him but Eddie was gone before Owen got to the door. He didn't know what had happened between those two but the look on Eddie's face said that it wasn't good.

The next few days went by so quickly. The morning of the wedding was beautiful. The sun was shining and the birds were chirping outside of Hannah's window. Everything was perfect except for the bride. As Janet helped Hannah get ready, she couldn't help but notice this look in Hannah's eyes. Suddenly Hannah said to Janet, "I can't do this, I just can't do this. What am I doing? This is all wrong Janet it is just all wrong."

Janet stood there in shock and didn't know what to say. Hannah got up and ran out of the room. Janet just stood there as if frozen, speechless when Big Cat came running into the room and said, "Where is Hannah going Janet?" She couldn't even answer she just looked at him. And just like that, the wedding was off.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11:

(you may need some tissues for this one…for all of you Jeddie fans, hold tight…it's coming…)

After Janet had returned to Hope, she recalled her last few days in the Ridge. Hannah had successfully escaped from marrying the wrong man as it turns out and seemed to be ok with her decision. Big Cat was not so OK with the decision but did what Big Cat always does and that is make a jack ass out of himself.

Deep down Janet knew Hannah had made the right decision but she needed to get there on her own. Janet was happy for Hannah in the end and Hannah seemed to be getting there too, now she was just dealing with her very angry mother.

Dwayne had been great while they were in the Ridge and seemed to enjoy himself a lot . She was so happy at this point in her life that she didn't think anything could make her feel any different. Unfortunately for Janet that feeling was about to change.

Dwayne decided that he couldn't keep his secret from Janet any longer. They had such an amazing time in Knight's Ridge that he just felt like he was betraying her keeping this secret from her but he knew she would be devastated. This was a conversation he had spent his whole life trying to avoid but when he decided to pursue the relationship with Janet he knew that this would have to happen.

A week after they returned from the Ridge Dwayne and Janet had a nice dinner at home and were sitting in the all to familiar all season's porch, snuggling into each other as they often did. Dwayne looked at Janet and she immediately knew something was wrong.

Dwayne began, "Janet there is something that I need to tell you. I know that you are going to be upset with me and I don't blame you but I just can't keep it from you any longer."

Janet's eyes filled with tears, "Are you breaking up with me?"

"No! No! Janet if I could you your forever I would without hesitation but all I can give you is mine." Dwayne's eyes began to fill with tears, this was much harder than he ever thought possible.

Janet looked at him and knew instantly that something was very wrong. "I don't understand Dwayne what does that mean, my forever…you are scaring me."

"Janet I have Lou Gehrig's disease. I have known about it for a long time and my body is beginning to show signs that I will be gone within months. I know that this is difficult to understand but do you remember when I said that I don't normally get to know anyone or why you have never seen me with anyone? That is because I never wanted to hurt anyone with my illness. Janet you are so special to me…I know asking you out was so selfish but I just couldn't live the rest of my life without you being a part of it. I want you to know that I love you with every fiber of my being and I wish I could give you forever but that forever will be mine instead of yours."

Janet just sat there with tears running down her face. "Did he just say months…he will only be alive for the next few months?" Her mind was screaming.

Dwayne sat there waiting for her to slap him or storm off or whatever else she wanted to do because he knew he deserved every bit of it. He was surprised to say the least with her response.

Janet looked into his eyes, "I love you too Dwayne more than you can even imagine. No matter what happens, no matter how sick you become, I want you to know that I will be there by your side, handing your hand. My face will be the last one you see and you will know that even though your time on this earth was cut way to short that you are loved and that you will be missed more than you could possibly know." Janet placed her hand on his cheek and gently wiped the tears away from his face.

Dwayne had never expected this response. He felt so incredibly guilty but yet so amazing at the same time. How could he have gotten so lucky for this incredible woman to come into his life. There were times that he was so scared of what was happening to him. He covered everything so well, no one had ever suspected he was so sick but things were starting to deteriorate this much he knew. The doctors appointments were getting more frequent and he was starting to show signs of the damage to his nerves. His doctors had talked to him about the stages and the paralysis that was likely coming within the next few months. He knew once the paralysis occurred that the end would not be too far away and he couldn't risk Janet finding out any other way. He owed her that much, she deserved that much. She deserved a man to grow old with and have a full life with and that was just not something he could give her although he really wanted too.

As all these things were in his mind, all he felt was love coming from this beautiful woman now holding him against her chest. A place he had grown to love and feel so safe in. How could he possibly be able to say goodbye to her. He decided to cherish every moment they had together and make the most of their time, what little there was left of it.

As the days, weeks and months went by, Dwayne became weak so quickly. It was as if God was waiting for him to tell her his secret because shortly after that day he began to show signs of paralysis in first his right knee, than traveling to his foot and then onto the other leg. Over the course of merely 8 weeks, Dwayne found himself in the hospital barely able to control what was left of his body.

One day, Janet was sitting by his bed side as she had promised him all these weeks ago and he thought it was time to talk to her about her future and about Eddie. He had heard that The Edwardson's were getting better and it would just be a matter of time before they were ready to come home. The doctors were thinking maybe in 6 months time or sooner depending on their recent improvements, Janet would need to make some decisions and he knew that he would no longer be the reason she would stay in Hope because by that time he would be gone.

Dwayne squeezed Janet's hand and as always she came right up to him from the chair she was sitting in and gently kissed his lips. He loved her so much and loved it when she kissed him that way. It would be one of the many things he would miss about her. He began, "Janet can we talk for a bit?"

"Sure babe what do you want to talk about?" Janet said stroking his head and smiling her biggest smile.

Dwayne could not believe how strong she had been throughout all of this. Other than the day he told her, he never once saw her cry or get angry. She went to all of his doctors appointments with him and suggested that he move in with her. She didn't want to waste a single second that they had left together. He had agreed happily. It wouldn't have been how he really wanted it to be but he wanted the same for himself. His relationship with Janet brought him the biggest amount of happiness that he had ever felt in his life and although sometimes he became angry that God was taking it away, Janet would just reassure him and say that is why he brought us together Dwayne. No one he had ever met made him feel the way she had and he was the luckiest man to have found her, but he needed her to think of her future and open herself up to the possibilities of someone else, the one other man who loved her just as much as he did, the one that deserved another chance at making her happy – the one that could give her forever – Eddie.

Dwayne knew she would resist this conversation but he needed to have it while he was still able to since everyday it seemed he was losing more and more ground.

"I want to talk about you and what you are planning on doing when I am gone. I know, I know that you don't want to talk in terms like that but I need to know that you are going to be ok. I need to know that you are going to go back to the Ridge and face the one thing you have been avoiding all this time. I need to know that – in fact I need you to promise me that you will open yourself up again to possibility of love. I need to know that you will be taken care of and some day be a momma and live your life not in my memory but for you…I need for you to promise me that you will do that Janet, will you do that for me Janet?" Dwayne had tears in his eyes and could see the tears falling down Janet's face.

Dwayne went on, "Janet I know that you are not going to understand this right now or maybe you just aren't going to want to hear it but there is a man in the Ridge who is in love with you…just as I know somewhere in that heart of yours you still love him…he was the first man to love you Janet truly and completely and I know that you both made mistakes but don't dwell on the past Janet…give him the chance to make it right with you…give him the chance to love you just as you gave me. I need you to promise me that you will give him the chance because I know that he feels the same about you as I do but he can give you your forever…"

Janet was beyond words listening to him talk about Eddie. He was right she never dealt with her relationship with Eddie. She never asked about him or talked to him since their break up over a year ago. It seemed inconceivable now to even entertain that thought be how could she not give Dwayne what he wanted. But how could she promise something that she didn't even know was a possibility for her. She was certain Eddie had moved on, it wouldn't be like he was waiting for her, that was certainly something Eddie would never do. But she could never say no to Dwayne so she did as he asked.

"I promise you that when I return to the Ridge I will talk with Eddie and resolve our relationship to whatever natural conclusion it comes too. It has been a long time Dwayne and I am sure Eddie has certainly moved on with his life but you are right. I need to have that talk with him that I have been avoiding over this past year. I can not promise you that I will fall in love again with another man Dwayne but I won't close my heart to the possibility, OK?" She ran her hand over his cheek and kissed him so gently on the lips he barely felt it. "I love you Dwayne so much."

Days later Dwayne was gone. Janet was at his bedside, holding his hand, looking him in the eyes telling him just how much she loved him and would miss him just as she promised not three months earlier. Janet's face was the last thing that Dwayne saw before he closed his eyes and left the earth for heaven. Janet sat there holding his hand, crying softly until the doctors told her it was time to let him go.

Janet found herself at home however she can't remember how she got there. She felt so lost she didn't know what to do. She knew that she couldn't be alone so she called the one person who she knew would be there…

"Janet hey what goes on?" Hannah answered seeing Janet's name on the display

Silence was all she heard followed by some muffled cries, "Janet are you ok honey what is going on?"

"Hannah, I need you can you come here, can you come to Hope?" Janet could barely be heard.

"I am on my way, sweetie just give me the address?"

With that Janet gave the address of The Edwardson's home and Hannah hung up the phone and made one more phone call before getting in her car to go.

"Nick? Hi It's Hannah"

"What goes on Hannah?" Nick somewhat puzzled asks

"I need a favor I have to go out of town, Janet's in trouble and I need someone to look after Sam, do you think you could do that for me, please?" Hannah said in a hurried voice.

"Sure Hannah of course what is wrong with Janet?"

"I don't know exactly, she just called and is upset, crying I don't know I have never heard her that way…I just know that she needs me and I need to go."

"Let me know if there is anything I can do Ok, I'll be by later to pick up Sam just go to Janet, do whatcha gotta do."

"Thanks Nick."

With that Hannah was gone.

Nick thought a bit and tried to decide if he should tell Eddie. Seeing Janet with Dwayne certainly had a negative affect on Eddie. It was as if someone had taken his will to live when he left Sully's that night.

Eddie tried to move on with his life after that night but he found he just couldn't get her out of his mind. He had gone on a few dates but they went no where because he just found himself comparing everyone to Janet. He would get angry because it seemed so easy for her to move on but then after meeting Dwayne he knew why. How could he be angry with her? Eddie knew he had been a fool to treat Janet the way he had. He had insecurities too he had never really had a relationship like this before…not even with Rory – that was teenage lust basically and what he had been doing before Janet well that was just "dating" no he was no more experienced than Janet but he could never let her see that…now he wished he had…so many mistakes, so many regrets. He knew he would never have another chance with Janet that was clear but what was he suppose to do now that no one else seemed to make him happy either. Eddie resigned himself to a life without love and poured himself into work.

Nick decided to wait a bit first and see what the problem was. Janet was upset that is what Hannah said so maybe something happened with her grandparents or maybe her and this guy broke up or something. Until he knew more, Nick would keep it in the vault.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12:

As Janet sat in her house on the very couch that she shared so often with Dwayne she couldn't believe that he was gone. How was she going to be able to deal with this? The pain was so great she just burst into tears yet again and buried her face in a pillow until she heard a knock on the door.

Janet got up and walked to the front door and opened it. There stood Hannah with her arms open. She didn't understand what was going on but looking at Janet's face she knew that some thing was terribly wrong.

Janet walked into her arms and they stood there for what seemed like hours but really was only minutes and then Janet broke away and said, "here let me grab your bag and you can come in." There was no emotion in her voice it sounded almost mechanical. Janet lead Hannah in and set her one bag just inside the door. She closed the door and walked back in the direction of the the couch that she had just left.

Hannah looked around a bit and was taken aback at the amazing house she was standing in. She said to Janet, "so this is where you have been living all this time, no wonder you didn't want to come home."

She walked over to Janet and sat next to her on the couch. "Now tell me Janet what is going on…why are you so upset? Did something happen with your grandparents?" Hannah had no idea what she was about to hear.

"No Hannah my grands are just fine…it is Dwayne…he passed away this morning." With that a new batch of tears started and Hannah just reached for Janet and hugged her as tightly as she could. She was absolutely stunned at this news. Never in a million years did she think this had to do with Dwayne dying. She just didn't know what to say.

There wasn't much conversation that first few hours only Hannah comforting Janet's sobs on and off through out the late afternoon and into the evening. Janet didn't want to eat anything and eventually fell asleep on the couch so Hannah covered her up and made her way to the kitchen.

"This house is absolutely gorgeous…I wonder if this house was Dwayne's?" Hannah thought. She made herself a sandwich and found herself walking around the house and made her way outside. She decided to give Nick a call and check on Sam since Janet was sleeping and Sam would be getting ready for bed at this time back in the Ridge.

"Hey Nick it's Hannah…just wanted to know how Sam was doing?" Nick answered the phone to hear Hannah's voice.

"He is fine Hannah you just left a few hours ago…how is Janet? What was wrong?" Nick asked

"It's bad, Nick, my heart is just broken for her. Dwayne died this morning. I have never seen her like this. I don't know what happened because she spent the better part of day crying but I get the feeling that it wasn't a shock to her. Something must have happened after the wedding because she would have told me if he was sick or something. I don't know – all I know is I will be here for a while." Hannah just stared off into the yard.

Nick sat there, stunned. He was definitely not expecting that response. He finally responded, "well you take all the time you need. Do you think I should tell Eddie?"

"No Nick I don't. They haven't spoken in over a year now is not the time for them to hammer out their issues. I know that Eddie still cares about her but I just think she has got a lot right now and that would be too much for her, ya know?" Hannah wasn't sure at all if she was right but with what she just saw of Janet Eddie showing up would not be a good thing.

"Ok Hannah I'll keep it close but at some point we need to let Eddie know. You know he loves her and would be upset to know she was upset and he couldn't be there regardless of what has happened between them they were friends at one point. This could change a lot of things for both of them, ya know…just think about it is all I'm saying, ok?" Nick knew that Eddie would be upset knowing that she was hurt and he couldn't be there especially now that his impossibility could be a possibility again.

"I know what your saying Nick but she is just so hurt and devastated right now I just don't think now is the time, that is all I'm saying…well give Sam a hug for me and I'll call him tomorrow, k?" Hannah said thinking that she should go and check on Janet.

"We'll do Hannah Jane." With that that call ended.

Hannah returned to the house and walked in the all seasons porch to find Janet awake and staring out at the garden of flowers in the back yard. "Those flowers are so beautiful Janet." Hannah was trying to make small talk to see if Janet wanted to talk.

"Yeah they really are. Dwayne and I used to sit on this couch and look out over those flowers in the evening sometimes. How am I going to live with out him Hannah?" Janet was beginning to tear up again.

"Can you tell me what happened to Dwayne?" Hannah cautiously asked.

"He had Lou Gehrig's disease. He told me when we got back from your wedding weekend but by that time his symptoms were steadily getting worse and he knew that his symptoms were only going to get worse and eventually take his life. I just didn't think it would happen so quickly…it seemed like after he told me it was a blink of an eye and he was gone." Janet looked down at her hands.

"Oh Janet I am so sorry. Why didn't you tell me that he was sick?" Hannah knew that this disease was fatal and once the symptoms got to a certain point the disease progressed quickly and were fatal.

"I didn't know what to say and I didn't want the rest of his life to be about sickness. It was hard enough for him to be sick and worse having to tell me. I wanted to be able to enjoy being with him – it just wasn't long enough. "Janet buried herself in the pillow once again.

Hannah moved back to her spot on the couch. She put the pillow on her lap and Janet laid down on it and cried softy as Hannah stroked her hair and that is how they spent the rest of the evening.

The next morning the hospital called and talked to Janet. Apparently Dwayne had listed Janet as her emergency contact and they wanted to know what funeral home to send his remains to. Janet was stunned as she hadn't really talked to Dwayne about his final wishes. All she knew is that he wanted to be cremated but she didn't know if he had family or anything. She chose one of the two they had in town and got off the phone. She looked at Hannah and said, "he never told me about his family or what he wanted but he listed me on all of his paperwork…what am I going to do?" Janet looked like she was beginning to panic so she took over. "It's ok Janet we'll just look through his papers, I am sure that he took care of all of this we just have to find it, OK?" Hannah tried to keep a level head but on the inside she was praying that what she just said was true.

Just then the phone rang again. This time is was an attorney, Mr. James Bailey. He asked for Janet. Janet once again answered the phone more nervous than she was before. He asked if it was her and she indicated it was. He went on "Hello Ms. Meadows. I understand that Mr. Johnson passed away yesterday. I am very sorry for your loss. He had met with me and I was handling his estate and funeral planning. I have his requests and information on how to contact his family. He also left his entire estate to you Ms. Meadows so I will need you to come to my office in the next few weeks to handle that paperwork. Can you tell me what funeral home his remains will be sent to? I can call them and complete all further planning with them directly since I am sure this is a difficult time for you. If you need anything further please feel free to contact me and I look forward to meeting you in the upcoming weeks."

Janet hung up the phone and just stood there as if she was unable to move. Hannah came over to her and said, "Who was that?"

As if snapping out it, Janet replied, "That was Dwayne's attorney. He apparently planned for all of his funeral arrangements and made out a will….he made me the beneficiary…" Janet just stared off in space.

Hannah just looked at her for a second not knowing exactly what to say…before she could respond Janet began talking,...

"He planned his own funeral…he planned for me to get every thing he had…he planned everything…(she was yelling now) did he plan on how I would feel when he was gone…did he plan on leaving me alone…did he plan on how I was suppose to be ok with all of this…how could he do this to me!" Janet was half yelling half crying at this point.

Hannah saw what was coming now. She did the best thing she could for Janet, just let her vent her sadness and anger as she knew that Janet needed to let it go…

"Hannah how could he have done this to me…how could he have made me fall in love with him knowing he was going to die…how could he do that to me? How could he say that he loved me and than go away…how could he make me promise him that I would talk to Eddie and find love again…how could he do that!" Janet was walking around flailing her arms in the air…

Hannah was taken a back by what Janet just said, "What did you say? He made you promise to talk to Eddie? What do you mean, why would he say that?"

"He told me that Eddie was still in love with me and Dwayne made me promise when I went back to the Ridge that I would talk to him but you know as well as I do it has been a year Hannah Eddie has probably moved on by now, probably with Rory, right?" Janet looked to Hannah for the answer

Hannah just looked at Janet not knowing if this was the right time to tell her or not. "Did Dwayne know Eddie or something? Why would he think Eddie is still in love with you?" (Clearly stalling to find out more information.)

"I don't know Hannah, he just said that because I have never talked to Eddie. I never saw him when I went back to the Ridge and I really feel like Eddie has nothing to say to me, it has been too long. I told Dwayne that I would talk to him to resolve our issues but I just don't see the point now. I don't see the point of anything now. Dwayne is gone…the one person who I truly believe loved me…now I am more alone than when I left the Ridge." Janet walked back to the couch as if her recent anger outburst hadn't happened and sank into the cushions and began to once again stare out the window at the flowers in the garden.

Hannah just stood there not knowing what to do. Janet clearly thought Eddie had moved on with his life but he hadn't. He certainly wasn't with Rory and as much as Hannah had been upset with Eddie over how he had treated Janet over the course of the last year she saw how Eddie had changed and knew that Eddie was suffering inside more than anyone truly realized. Hannah knew this because when Janet came back for her wedding she was suppose to go and get Janet's house ready for her return but she had gotten busy and just hadn't gotten over there but Janet thanked her for keeping her house so clean and getting it ready. Hannah knew in that moment that someone was keeping it up for Janet and it wasn't her. Nick would often talk about Eddie disappearing for periods of time and no one knew where he would go but Hannah knew after Janet came back that Eddie had most likely been going to Janet's house and spending time in the one place that was the closest he could get to her.

Hannah decided to drop it for now and just try and help Janet threw the next few weeks as she knew the funeral would be coming and the reading of the will. Janet would need lots of help in that time and Hannah knew her friend needed her.

Later that night, Hannah called Nick after Janet had fallen asleep once again on the couch in the all season's porch.

"Hey Nick it's me. How is Sam doing ?" Hannah asked physically exhausted from the emotional day.

"He is doing good. You missed him though he was tired so he went to bed already. How is Janet holding up?" Nick asked concerned

"She is ok but not good. She goes from being so sad to so angry…I don't know if she knows how she feels. He had apparently pre planned his funeral and left everything to her…he even made her promise to talk to Eddie when she came back to the Ridge…that he was still in love with her. It has really been messing with her mind because she thinks that Eddie has moved on with his life, with Rory no less…I don't know if I should tell her or not…why do you think that Dwayne would have said that…it's not like he knew Eddie or anything." Hannah said clearly trying to work it out in her head.

Nick thought back to one of the few conversations he had had with Eddie and he remembered Eddie talking about a comment that Dwayne had made about not losing sight of how he felt about her that something that felt lost really isn't or something like that. Eddie was so confused by that comment it haunted him for weeks after that. Nick started to put things together in his mind that Dwayne was letting Eddie know in his own way that Janet would come back to him if he didn't give up on her. "oh my god Hannah, Dwayne made a comment to Eddie at Sully's that night of your bachelorette party…" "what? They talked at Sully's when did that happen, I don't remember Janet mentioning that?" Hannah was so confused.

"That is because Janet didn't know about it Hannah obviously Dwayne wanted it that way. You realize we have to tell Eddie now. Dwayne wanted Eddie to know and be there for Janet. That must have been what he meant that night." Nick was talking rapidly now as if the wheels in his head were turning so quickly he couldn't keep up.

Hannah just sat there on the phone trying to process everything that Nick was saying. It made sense but how would Janet react to all of this. Her emotions were all over the place. She didn't know if Eddie showing up right now would be a good idea.

"I don't know Nick, right now Janet is all over the place with her emotions. I agree with what you are saying but Eddie tends to react in these situations…I just don't know if right now is a good time for him to just show up. Janet loved Dwayne Nick and this is going to be very difficulty for her, having Eddie return and having to deal with all of that too might be too much for her. Use your judgment with Eddie, Nick and I'll be here for Janet. I have a feeling though that Dwayne may be working his magic even from heaven to help Janet through this and bring her home to us." Hannah began to tear up now realizing just how amazing Dwayne was and why Janet loved him so much. Hannah knew in that very moment that Dwayne loved Janet so much that he was trying to reunite her with the first man she ever really loved even though he knew he wasn't the only man Janet loved. How selfless is that kind of love.

Hannah thought, "No Janet you are wrong, Dwayne didn't want to hurt you, he didn't want you to feel alone after he was gone, he wanted to spend the rest of his life with the woman he loved more than his own life. He wanted you to have his heart forever but was willing to leave this earth with the hope that you would give your heart back to the man that was truly hurting realizing he had lost the love of his life…he left this earth knowing that eventually you would realize that Eddie was the man you were meant to spend your life with and have children with and though Dwayne will always hold that special place within your heart…your heart truly belonged to Eddie long before Dwayne found you and this is how it was meant to be." Hannah walked over to Janet still sleeping on her couch and brushed her hair back a bit. "No Janet, he loved you enough to let you go and in time you will be able to do the same just as you promised him."

In the days that followed, Janet struggled to keep herself together. The funeral arrangements had been taken care of by Mr. Bailey just as he promised. The funeral home called Janet and let her know all the details of when and where everything would take place. As it turns out Dwayne did not have much family left but he did have a few family members attending. She didn't know how she felt about all of this. She was so overwhelmed but was grateful to have Hannah by her side.

The funeral was beautiful and simple just as Dwayne would have wanted. Nearly the entire town of Hope attended and offered their support to Janet. His death was just as much of a surprise to them as it was to Hannah. They all felt so terribly for Janet but life sometimes can be cruel. Janet met some of Dwayne's distant relatives, the only ones that were able to attend. They seemed to know about her and were very kind. Janet realized that Dwayne must have known for such a long time that this illness would reunite him with the rest of his family that had suffered similar fates. She thought about him carrying that secret around and keeping people at arms length to protect them from what this felt like. She knew in that thought that it must have been difficult for Dwayne to remain so isolated and somehow felt so honored and privileged that he chose her to share what was left of his life. Even though his loss would be difficult for her to accept she knew that at least in the end of his life he knew love and comfort as she would have been very sad if he would have died alone. She could feel her anger dissipate a little but she was left with sadness at the loss of the man she loved. She couldn't help but think of the conversation she had with her grandma about loves in your life and how some are meant to be short and powerful and some long and passionate. Some loves return if they are lost and some are not meant to return at all. Those loves she always said were sent to us as a gift to be cherished and understood as a life lesson learned.

Janet just then noticed the door open to see her grands walk into the funeral home. She had never been so happy to see them in her life. She ran to her grandma's arms and they embraced for several minutes. Her grandma looked Janet in the eyes and simply said, "this too shall pass my sweet."

Janet was grateful for the evening to be done. He was cremated and the ashes were placed in this beautiful Urn that Dwayne obviously selected. The funeral director gave it to Janet and said, "Dwayne wanted you to have his remains. He left a note to be given to you when you received them." He placed a small envelope in her hand and shook her hand slightly. With that the service was over.

Janet and Hannah said goodbye to Janets Grands and headed home. Janet put the small envelope in her purse as she didn't think she had the strength to read it now. As she lay in bed later that night, alone, all she could think about was that letter. So she got up and went to her purse to get it. She opened the small envelope to find a letter obviously written by Dwayne. Tears instantly formed in her eyes. She opened the letter and it read:

"Janet, how do I say good bye to you? I don't think that I can. I want you to know that your support and love have meant the world to me. I fully expected that you would be angry when you found out about my illness but you weren't. You just loved me, Janet and I could not have asked for a better gift. I no longer felt alone or afraid of what was ahead of me. I knew that when the time came that I had to say goodbye that I didn't really need to because you would know exactly what to do. I want you to know that in the months that we spent together both as friends and lovers I cherished every moment. The best decision I made in my life was to open my heart to you. I hope that you don't mind keeping me around for a while after I am gone but there is one place that I would like to be settled. Some day Janet I want you to grow a beautiful garden of flowers just like the one that Mrs. Edwardson has and when you do I want you to place my ashes in amongst those beautiful flowers. Those times we spent just looking at the flowers on that couch were the happiest moments of my life. It is where we first kissed and fell in love. That way I know that when you look over those flowers I can be apart of what makes you smile. I love your smile and I will miss it so much along with the rest of you. I love you so much Janet Meadows and I will look over you always. You made me a promise so please Janet take care of yourself and remember that first loves are sometimes meant to last a lifetime. Your first love, Janet was meant to last until the end of your life just as mine did, because Janet you were my first love and I want you to know the same feeling when you are ready to leave this earth that he will be by your side as well because he loves you just as I do. The words I didn't want to say it is unfortunately time for so until we meet again my love, Good bye Janet.

You will always have my heart – you were my forever Janet"

Love you always,

Dwayne

Janet put the letter down in her lap and began to cry harder than she did when Dwayne passed away. How would she be able to keep her promise when her heart hurt so badly? Why had he never told her that she was his first love? Had he closed himself off so completely that he was willing to go through his whole life without anyone to love before she moved to Hope? The journey ahead of her seemed so far away right now but she knew that she would eventually have to move on with the rest of her life. She had no idea why Dwayne kept bringing up Eddie as a possibility for her. He seemed so sure of Eddie's feelings yet Janet was so unsure. So much time had passed would it be possible to go back to that story. The story of Janet and Eddie, where neither one was sure of what they wanted or who or how they felt. After all wasn't that the reason for the end of that story? The one thing that Janet was sure of was that she could no longer live with uncertainty.

Janet made a promise to herself in that moment that from that moment on when she thought of Dwayne she would smile her biggest smile so he could see it in heaven, and when she returned home, she would plant her own flower garden and someday when the garden was filled with beautiful flowers she would place his ashes amongst the flowers so he could feel her love for him and finally when she moved back to Knight's Ridge that she would try and talk to Eddie. She was unsure of a lot of things when it came to Eddie but she was sure of one thing, she made a promise so that promise she would keep.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13:

Nick had been pacing around the office for what seemed like hours. He decided since Dwayne's funeral was over, it was time to tell Eddie the truth. He was not sure how this was going to go. Eddie hadn't really talked much to anyone about how he felt or anything since he got out of the hospital but something drastically changed in him after seeing Dwayne that night at Sully's. He did start to go out with women again but he never seemed interested and he certainly didn't go back to the Eddie he was before he met Janet. No one night stands no call backs…no NOTHING. It just seemed to all those close to Eddie that something in him died that night. Nick was hoping that this news would help bring him back.

Eddie walked into BFW and found Nick talking to himself. He thought, "nothing strange about that but why does he look so nervous…what's with the pacing."

"What goes on Nick?" Eddie finally asked.

Nick just stood there frozen…"how to start…what am I going to say? AHHHH." Nick thought.

"Eddie I have something I need to tell you but I think perhaps you should sit down first." Eddie was looking at Nick like he had lost his mind but sat down anyway.

Nick began, "Before I start I need you to listen to me until I am finished…I don't want you bolting out of here the minute you hear the first sentence because this is complicated and upsetting and well hard for me to say."

Eddie completely baffled at this point, said, "What is going on Nick? Are you leaving again or something just spit it out already."

"Ok, Hannah called me about two weeks ago and asked if I could watch Sam for her because Janet had called and was upset." Nick waited to see the reaction on Eddie's face and he definitely had his attention now.

"Janet called Hannah because she was upset and hurting. Eddie, I am just going to come right out and say it but I need for you not to leave until I tell you everything ok can you just promise me that."

Eddie was starting to freak out a bit…he knew that it was important that was why Nick was falling all over himself with words but what was he so worried about that Eddie was jump up…unless maybe Janet's Grands died or something…otherwise why would he need to do anything where Janet was concerned.

"Yeah Nicky I get it just finish what you need to tell me." Eddie sounded somewhat irritated.

"Eddie, Dwayne is gone. He passed away about two weeks ago. He had Lou Gehrig's disease and apparently the illness had progressed quickly after he was here for Hannah's wedding." Nick looked up to see Eddie's face completely drain to white.

"Hannah went to Janet's house – well at least the house that she has been living in and she is a mess. Dwayne's funeral was last week. It looks as though she will be returning to Knight's Ridge in a few months. There is something else…do you remember the comment that Dwayne made to you in the bar that night – the night of Hannah's bachelorette party?" Eddie simply nodded.

"I think he was trying to let you know in his own way to help Janet through this…that sometimes things that we think are lost are not…she is not lost to you Eddie."

The last statement seemed to spark something in Eddie. He looked up at Nicky and his color started to return. "How is she Nicky?"

"According to Hannah, she is getting a little better but really upset. She only knew about his illness a few months before he died. She was with him when he passed away."

He had so many conflicting feelings at this very moment. He sat there in silence for what seemed like hours to Nick because he just couldn't tell where Eddie was at. He wasn't bolting for the door so that was a good sign but he didn't seem to react the way Nick had suspected he would. Was it really over for Eddie? Had he gotten so accustomed to Janet being gone and with another man that he just gave up? Nick thought for sure that somewhere in this tragedy there would be some hope of a future between Eddie and Janet but the way Eddie was reacting maybe he had been wrong.

Eddie sat there and tried to figure out what to do with what he was feeling. Was it ok to feel what he was feeling? What would he do? He looked up at Nick and said, "Would you mind if I took off for the rest of the day. I think there is someone that I need to see."

"Eddie, you don't even know where she is?" Nick said hurriedly

"I am not going to see her Nicky." With that Eddie was gone.

Nick didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. "Who could he be going to see anyway if it wasn't Janet." Nick thought

Eddie got home and went to his room to pack a bag. He was done in minutes and told Phil as he hurried out the door that he would be back in a few days. Phil was sitting on the couch and said, "oh ok, Eddie…" "What was that all about" phil thought.

It was about 3pm when Eddie reached his destination. He checked into the hotel and made a call. Confirming his dinner plans he set out to meet the nicest woman he had ever met, Janet's grandma.

"Eddie! It is so good to see you. I was so surprised to get your call. How are you doing son?" Janet's grandma was so sweet and kind and always had a soft spot for Eddie.

"Hey Edith. I came here to talk to you about Janet."

"I kind of suspected. You know Eddie I once told Janet that love is a funny thing. Sometimes love stays with us for short periods of time and sometimes it stays with us for a lifetime. Love can be very hard sometimes to remember and sometimes very hard to forget, but when it is true it can withstand anything – betrayal, distance, time, wars, mistakes, nonsense, even other kinds of love…but Eddie when it's real it never really goes away does it." She looked into Eddie's eyes and grabbed his wrist.

"No I guess it doesn't." Eddie said so softly

"Eddie, Janet is hurting…she feels very lost. I know the two of you have much that needs to be said and resolved between you too. She loved Dwayne but in her heart there has always been another love that she could not let go of, not completely…some love is meant to be forever Eddie… give her some time what she needs right now is support, kindness and love. Her heart will find it's way back to that love…just give her some time." Edith always had a way with words but she didn't want Eddie to lose sight of what was important. Janet loved Dwayne but her heart never got over Eddie and judging by this young man with the sad eyes sitting in front of her he hadn't either.

"I don't know what to do. I want to go to her but we haven't spoken in over a year and the last things I said to her…" Eddie had tears in his eyes.

"Eddie, the past is the past. She needs her friends right now around her helping her to heal, you started off being friends right? Find a place Eddie to help her find herself again and let the heart do the rest."

Eddie sat there and thought for a second. She was right. They started off as friends and all the times that he screwed up in the beginning she never lost faith in their friendship. Now it was his turn to do the same.

"I have a little story that you might enjoy hearing. Do you know where Janet was living?"

"No she didn't tell anyone where she was at until she called Hannah the day Dwayne passed away." Eddie said.

"She is living in Hope, MA – it is about an hour from here. She is house sitting for Mr. and Mrs. Edwardson. They are staying here at the nursing home to recuperating from some pretty serious illnesses. My Janet was very lost when she came to visit us after the two of you broke up. She needed direction and they needed someone to take care of their home. But not just their home, see Mrs. Edwardson has this beautiful garden of flowers. This garden began as the tiniest of seeds that her husband would bring back from all his time on the road for his job. He would tell her that in every city he went he saw a flower that reminded him of her so he would find out what that flower was and buy the seed for her to plant in her garden. Mrs. Edwardson loves to garden and would spend hours taking care of each and every flower that she planted, making sure that they would grow into the beautiful flowers so when her husband would come home from his trips the flowers would remind him of her. It helped him when he needed to be away from her so much in the beginning of their marriage. Over the years as he stopped traveling as much he didn't buy her so many flowers because every year she would get a bigger and brighter flower for each seed that she had planted. Every year when her garden would come in she would see the love that her husband had for her even though they were apart most of the time in the beginning of their marriage. As the years went on and he didn't travel as much, they both got to enjoy that garden together. Janet helped to preserve that love Eddie even though she doesn't know any of this. She helped keep those flowers safe and growing so when Mrs. Edwardson goes home in a month or two she will be able to see those flowers and be reminded of how much her husband loved her because Eddie he isn't going home with Mrs. Edwardson. Mr. Edwardson passed away a few months ago. Janet will never know how much her time in Hope saved Mrs. Edwardson because without those flowers she may not have been going home either. Love is a powerful thing Eddie. Don't ever lose sight of what it can do…even though it has been a long time since you and Janet have been talking or together as a couple – the heart never forgets that first love, that powerful love that exists with the person that is meant to be with you forever. Mrs. Edwardson gave me this ring to give to Janet as a thank you for taking such great care of her house. Mr. Edwardson gave her this ring when they celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary. It has all the colors of each of the flowers that bloom in that garden. Each color represents how much his love for her grew over the years. I want you to take this ring and give it to Janet. You decide in your heart when it is time to give it to her. You're a good man Eddie, forgive yourself for what you hold onto…I know you'll know what to do when the time comes." With that she gently placed his cheek in her hand.

Eddie was not an openly emotional person but tears were in his eyes. Truth be told he hadn't ever forgiven himself for the words he said to Janet that day in the hospital or how he treated her the day Rory returned. When he met Dwayne he knew that this man was everything that Janet needed and that Eddie wasn't. As he sat there, he decided that it was about time to be the man that she needed and the man that he was inside. He made a promise to God that if he ever got the chance again with Janet he would not let her slip through his fingers. He was going to keep that promise.

Eddie took the ring from Janet's grandma Edith and put it in his pocket. "Thanks gram's…I promise you that I will take good care of her." Eddie reached over and squeezed Edith's hand.

"Now about that lunch you promised me, I hear the pudding cups are fabulous here." Eddie now grinning and with that the three enjoyed a nice conversation over lunch.

Eddie made his way back to the hotel later on that afternoon and tried to decide what to do. He decided to call the one person that may be able to help him, but will she want to.

"Hello?"

"Hey Hannah it's Eddie."

"How did I know I would be hearing from you…where are you anyway? Nick said you left rather suddenly and didn't say where you were going?" Hannah wanted to find out what he was up to

"Listen Hannah. I need your help. You were right about me. I was all wrong with Janet and for Janet in so many ways when we were together but I know now that Janet is the woman I want to be with. I love her Hannah and I know that she doesn't feel the same right now but I want to be there for her and help her through this." Eddie felt like he was begging for his life.

"Eddie, I know that I was hard on you and I do think you deserved it at that time but I can see that you are a different person now and she needs you to be. Dwayne was an amazing man, more than you can possibly know. Be her friend Eddie. Talk to her and support her. Let her cry over Dwayne and listen to her stories about him. She needs time to heal and not pressure to get back together or anything. Let it happen when the time is right Eddie. Can you do that? Can you be that man?"

"Yeah Hannah I can." Eddie was beginning right now with his assuredness.

"Ok than how soon can ya get here?" Hannah smiled


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14:

The day had finally come and Eddie was nervous to the say the least. As he drove towards the little town of Hope, he tried to think about what he would say, what she would say. Would she be happy to see him? Would she slam the door in his face? So many questions…he just never really thought he would ever get this chance again after seeing Dwayne that night at Sully's. He must admit to himself that Dwayne must have been one hell of a guy because even then he was thinking of Janet saying what he did to Eddie. He knew that he would not be around to really give her the life she deserved. Eddie thought, "you got to respect the man for that."

As he arrived in Hope his heart was pounding so steadily he thought perhaps he may have a heart attack. He knew he couldn't got to her now when he was so clearly freaking out so when he turned the corner and saw Big Jim's he figured a beer might help to calm him a bit. He pulled into the parking lot and made his way into the bar.

He sat at a stool up at the bar and Jim himself came over. "Well hello there, welcome to Big Jim's what can I get ya?"

"Some liquid courage (Eddie laughed a bit)…a pint please." Eddie looked like he was going to pass out.

Jim returned with his pint and asked, "here ya go…so what brings you to our little town today?"

Eddie looked at Big Jim. He kind of reminded him of Sully in a way. He said, "I came to talk to an old friend. She just lost someone. I haven't seen her in a long time."

"Oh you must be talking about Janet Meadows." Jim said shaking his head.

Eddie was a bit taken a back, "ahh Yeah how did you know?"

"Well Janet is a town favorite. She actually was working here up until Dwayne got sick. Such a tragedy. Everyone loves Janet and it was heart breaking to see her lose Dwayne so soon after they found one another. Such a shame really. We are all gonna miss her when she goes back home." Jim almost looked like he was starting to tear up.

Eddie just sat there and stared at Jim. This should not be a surprise to him that she was working at a bar. It got him thinking though as to how it was that so many people could be cruel to her in the Ridge yet these people who have known her for such a short amount of time loved her instantly. It further confirmed for him that there were so many things that Janet had to deal with in the Ridge and Eddie just couldn't see it then but he can now and things were definitely going to change.

"Yeah Janet is a special person that is for sure. We will be happy to have her back in the Ridge but that is sort of why I am here…Dwayne was quite a man, it is a shame what happened to him." Eddie would have said that it was a shame that they lost each other so soon but he knew he wouldn't have meant it. He would be man enough to help her get over her feelings for Dwayne but he didn't even want to think about what his life would have been like without her in it.

Jim just stared at Eddie, wondering what his relationship was with Janet. He seemed to care a lot about her to just be a friend and why is he in here drinking if he is here to take care of her. Jim sensed that there was more this story than it seemed but out of respect for Janet he let it be. He only hoped that this guy was going to be a good thing for Janet because she deserved to be happy.

Eddie finished his drink and said, "Thanks…I think it is time to head over there. I'll let her know you are thinking of her."

Jim smiled and said, "Give her a big hug from me and let her know that we all miss her here. If she needs anything have her give us a call anytime. It was nice to meet ya."

"We'll do" Eddie said turning and heading out the door.

Eddie made the short drive to the address that Hannah gave him. He could hardly believe the house in front of him. What an amazing yard. Of course he would notice the landscaping first. As he parked his truck, he noticed her Jeep in the driveway. Hannah must have left already to return to the Ridge.

He approached the door and his hands were shaking. He had waited so long for this moment. He thought, "Ok this is it…remember strength Eddie, be the man she needs you to be….everything else will follow."

He knocked on the door and within seconds the door opened and there stood Janet. He was taken aback when he saw her. She was dressed in sweats and her hair was everywhere. Her eyes were puffy and her nose was red. He had never seen her look more unhappy in all the years he had known her.

Janet looked up to find Eddie standing at her front door. Shock wasn't even a good description of what she felt at that moment. She stood there frozen as if she could not move a limb. Eddie was the last person she ever thought she would see at her door in Hope.

Eddie smiled at Janet and said, "Hi Janet"

Janet just looked at him and as if involuntarily she stepped forward and his arms opened and they embraced. They stayed frozen that way for what seemed like hours though it was only minutes. There was something between the two of them that both of them could feel. What that was remained undetermined.

If Janet was being honest with herself, somewhere in her heart she was so happy to see him. She thought, "I can't believe that he is here. He came here for me. He came here because…" Just then she pulled back and said, "Why are you here Eddie?" Her eyes seemed to pierce his soul.

"Can I come in at least." Eddie said feeling a little weird just standing on the porch.

"Oh yeah sure sorry" Janet stepped aside. She closed the door behind him and walked back to the room she spent most of her time in.

As she approached the all season's porch, Eddie was walking behind her he stopped when he saw the beautiful garden so clearly in his view. This was the garden that Janet's grandma, Edith talked about the day before. He instantly reached for the ring that was in his pocket to make sure it was still there. The beauty of those flowers along with the story that he was told made him pause just for a second, he knew right then that he would give his Janet, his love the same beautiful garden one day just so she would never forget how much he loved her and how he held onto that love until she returned to him.

"Ahh Eddie are you ok?" Janet saw him stare out the window and had no idea what he was doing.

"Yeah, I'm sorry but those flowers, that garden are just so beautiful…you remember I was a landscaper once right?" Eddie tried to lighten the mood a bit.

"Yeah I remember Eddie, so what are you doing here? How did you know where to find me?" Janet was just confused as to why he was there.

"Janet, I am so sorry to hear about Dwayne. I know that you and I have not spoken for a long time but when I found out about his death I know you needed a friend. I know that deep down you are hurting and no matter what has happened between us I would never let you go through something like this alone. I am here for you, Janet, what ever you need." Eddie was so direct and looked into her eyes.

Janet was stunned by what Eddie just said, it sounded so heartfelt. It was as if their relationship hadn't happened, it was as if the last words that they spoke to each other were not harsh or angry…it was as if Eddie really cared about her feelings…what did all of this mean? Janet's mind was spinning. Suddenly she said, "do you want some thing to drink or anything? Or to sit…here." She pointed to the couch, the one across from the one she was clearly sitting in before he arrived.

"No I'm fine" Eddie said as he went to sit on the opposite couch.

"Janet, I know that we have a lot of talking to do but right now I am more concerned about you and how you are doing. We will have plenty of time to deal with all that later right now I would like to hear about Dwayne. You know I met him at Sully's the night of Hannah's bachelorette party. He really seemed like a nice guy." Eddie tried to sound sincere hoping that she would start talking a bit more.

"I didn't know you were there that night at Sully's or that you too had met." Janet stated really softly to herself "but it explains a lot.'

"I'm sorry Eddie, this just seems so weird… I mean I haven't seen you in a year and you are asking me about my boyfriend who just died…does this seem weird to you?" Janet just had to get it out there.

Eddie thought, "Yep this is the Janet I am used too, always pointing out the reality in the situation."

"Look I know that this probably does seem weird to you and your right it is difficult to sit here and listen to you talk about the man you are in love with when that man isn't me but Janet you and I go way back and even though our relationship didn't last – we both made mistakes Janet but we were friends before all of that and I can't pretend like we weren't…I can't pretend like it is ok to know that you are here hurting and I am doing nothing about it. I can't pretend that I don't care Janet because I do so will you please let me help you? Will you please remember that our friendship was important and that is what friends do is support each other when things go wrong. I know that we have other things that need to be talked about but right now this is more important to me…making sure that you are ok. Do you understand?" Eddie had to make it clear.

Janet just stared at him across the room and the tears began to fall from her eyes. He was right. She did need him…she needed her friends to help her through this…she needed to feel like she wasn't totally alone because right now that is how she feels…He was her friend for many years before they started dating so maybe right now they don't have to deal with all of that…maybe it would be ok if she got her friend back.

Janet got up from the couch she was sitting on and went over to Eddie who was sitting on the edge of his seat by this time. She sat down next to him and fell into his arms and cried. Eddie wrapped her as tightly as he could and let her cry her heart ache into his chest. He knew in that moment that there is no where in the world he would rather be and that is where they remained for the next several hours.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15:

As Eddie sat on the couch realizing that Janet had fallen asleep after her rather long cry, he looked out of the window of this amazing porch that they were sitting in. He thought to himself that this has got to be the most beautiful home he had ever been in. His mind wandered back to his conversation with Janet's grandma about Mrs. Edwardson and how she would be returning here with out her husband and how difficult that would be. He couldn't begin to think of what that would feel like…well if it was even a little like living a year without Janet in his life…it would be unbearable. They say that time heals all wounds but he wasn't so sure that was true as it hadn't healed his longing for Janet, especially when he found out that Janet had fallen in love with Dwayne.

He knew that the road that they would travel to find one another again would be long and really up to Janet when she felt like she was ready to move on from the loss of Dwayne but at the same time he felt encouraged at this moment. Janet seemed to accept his friendship and that was a good start, but he wasn't foolish enough to think that it would be that easy. He was determined though to help her through this time in her life and when he felt she was ready he would tell her exactly how he felt. No hesitation or uncertainty just strength and confidence in his love for her. No this time she is going to know each and every day just how lucky he is to have her back in his life.

Janet slept for several hours and awoke sometime in the middle of the night still curled into Eddie's shoulder and chest. She couldn't believe that she had slept so long or for that matter fallen asleep at all. She hadn't slept well since Dwayne had passed away so she wasn't sure why exactly she slept so well now. Maybe Dwayne was right. Maybe there was still a place in her heart that never really got over Eddie. She never got the chance to see where this relationship could go but could we go back, she wondered? Is that was Eddie wants? Janet sat there still in his arms trying to figure out what the future could possibly hold for her and Eddie. She made the promise to Dwayne to figure it out and she was determined to keep her promise.

Janet could tell by his breathing that he was sleeping and she struggled with waking him up or just trying to go back to sleep. Just then she felt Eddie move and as if he had done this a hundred times his legs and feet moved up onto the couch and he moved Janet right along with him. She was able to catch a glimpse of him in the process and realized that he was totally asleep. Since she was in a position that if she tried to get up she would wake him she decided to just try and lay down and get some rest. She knew she needed it. So she laid her head on his chest along with her hand and curled into this shoulder once again. His arm tightened ever so slightly and she drifted back into sleep easily.

They both awoke the next morning or rather early afternoon around 11 am. Both of them were shocked that they slept so long. It was a little awkward at first because it was an all too familiar place for them to be but yet so unfamiliar at the same time. Janet was the first one to rise.

"Hey" she said somewhat shyly

"Hey yourself" Eddie said with a smile

He didn't really care about sleeping on the couch or the position he held, it was the best night's sleep he had gotten in over a year.

"You must be pretty hungry do you want something to eat?"

"Yeah I am pretty hungry" Eddie said

"Would you like to go and get something to eat or I could make you something?" Janet asked not real sure that she wanted to go out yet.

"How about you point me in the direction of a place with really good take out and I'll go get it so you can relax or take a shower or whatever you would like to do. I am guessing that going out in this town right now may still be a little difficult for you, what do you think?" Eddie said thinking back to the conversation with Jim about how the townspeople loved her they may want to help and overwhelm her.

Janet thought, "a shower does sound nice...he is right though maybe going out isn't the best either…I know everyone means well but I don't want to talk about it yet…Eddie is being so thoughtful – it seems some things have changed since I have been gone."

"You know what that sounds great. There is a place in town that has carry out and has really good burgers…not quite like Sully's but pretty close…I'll call there and order and you can go pick it up…I'll give ya the directions…it is a bar that I used to work in, it's called Big Jim's…" Janet said walking to get the phone

"Oh I know where that is already. Jim sends his hugs and well wishes by the way." Eddie had gotten caught up yesterday and forgotten to relay the message.

"You know Jim? How?" Janet was surprised

"I stopped there just before I came here and met the owner Jim…he told me that you worked there… he asked me to let you know that everyone was thinking of you and sending you hugs and their love." Eddie said looking at Janet now a little more intently.

"This is such a great town, Eddie. Maybe after lunch I tell ya more about how I came to end up here…that is if you want to hear about it because you totally don't have…" Eddie cut her off 

"Yes Janet I want to know…I came here because I want to know about your life and what you have been doing this past year. I know that I am the reason that you left the Ridge and I can't change that but one of the reasons I came aside from trying to help you through this time is I want to be a part of your life Janet in whatever way you feel comfortable with. I have missed you Janet. So yes I want to hear all about your life here including you telling me about Dwayne when your ready, Ok?" Eddie had to try and get her to understand that he was serious.

Janet sat there for a moment and looked at Eddie. She was still a little shocked by all of this, she had always envisioned her first meeting with Eddie to be awkward and angry and uncomfortable, but this is nothing like how she thought it would be. Eddie seemed so confident and he didn't appear angry at all. She started to feel hopeful again that maybe there was a chance that she could at least have her friendship with Eddie back and for now that was enough. Something inside of her realized that she needed to return to the Ridge and begin to get back to the reality of living her life. That is what Dwayne wanted of her and that is what she needed to do for herself. She needed to stop hiding or running away from her mistakes. Dwayne taught her a valuable lesson and that was to hold your head up high and realize that you worth all the good things that life gives to you and even though right now she doesn't feel that life was being very fair she did realize that Dwayne was a gift to her and she wouldn't take that gift for granted. He was brought into her life for a reason and she would return to the Ridge with a confidence she had never known before. So she decided she would start with repairing her friendship with Eddie. Who knows what the future will hold for them but for now his friendship sounded pretty nice to her.

"Ok Eddie and just so you know you aren't the only reason why I left the Ridge." Janet smiled slightly and touched the top of his hand. Somehow Janet felt as though he needed to know it wasn't his fault. "I will tell you all about Hope but first let's start with those burgers."

While Eddie was gone getting the burgers, Janet decided to take a shower. She hadn't in days and she really thought it may help her to feel better.

She finished in the shower and got dressed in a new set of sweat pants and a t shirt. She still wanted to feel comfortable and knew that she wouldn't be going anywhere any time soon.

Just as she was walking into the kitchen the telephone rang and Janet picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Hey sweetheart it Grandma."

"Hey grandma, how are you doing? Is everything ok?" Janet could sense a sadness in her voice.

"Yes dear everything is ok. I just called to talk to you about Mrs. Edwardson and her plans to return to the house. I know that you are probably not ready to move out just yet because of Dwayne and all but it looks like she will be able to come home within the next few weeks." Edith was apprehensive knowing that this wasn't the part of the conversation that would be hardest.

"Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Edwardson are doing better. Well that is good news. You know what Grandma, I think I may be ready to go home. Some things have changed so I will have everything ready for them to return home when ever they are ready." Janet smiled a bit somewhat excited at the idea of going home now.

"Janet, there is something that I need to tell you. I wish I didn't have to share this with you right now but I don't want this to be a shock to you when Mrs. Edwardson comes home."

Janet now very concerned said, "Grandma just tell me…are you and grandpa ok?"

"Yes Janet we are just fine but Mr. Edwardson did not recover from his illness. He passed away Janet a little over a month ago. When Mrs. Edwardson returns home she will be on her own – well not entirely her daughter is planning to stay with her for a while but I didn't want you to find out any other way." Edith knew Janet would take it hard especially due to Dwayne's recent death.

Janet sat on the phone and didn't say a word. She could not conceive that Mrs. Edwardson would be returning home with out her husband, without the love of her life. She didn't know what to do. Her tears began to fall rapidly as if she had no control. Her mind drifted back to Dwayne and how badly she missed him and they hadn't been together for nearly a fraction of the time that Mrs. Edwardson had been with her husband. In that moment she realized just how precious life was and how quickly you can lose the one you love. As she sat there contemplating this revelation, the door opened and in walked Eddie with their lunch. He smiled at her but quickly his expression changed when he saw her face.

Janet then said, "Grandma I just don't know what to say. My heart breaks for her I can only imagine what she must be going through. But I want you to know that I will be ok Grandma, please don't worry about me. Please let Mrs. Edwardson know that I am truly sorry for her loss and whatever she needs I will be here and have her home ready for her return, OK?" Janet was hoping that her Grandma would just let it go for now.

"Janet are you ok? I don't like that you are there alone and going through all of this by yourself." Edith was worried about Janet.

Janet looked at Eddie who was now in the kitchen putting the food out on the table. Should she tell her grandma that he is there? How would he feel about that? As if Eddie could sense her questions, he walked over and took the phone from Janet.

"Hey Edith, it's Eddie." Eddie knew that Edith needed to know that Janet was being taken care of and she also needed to know that he had gone to Janet after their talk.

"Eddie, Oh I am so glad you are there. I just told her about Mr. Edwardson. How is she doing really? Oh I suppose you can't talk much just make sure my dear grand daughter is ok, promise me Eddie that you will remember our talk and take care of my Janet." Edith felt like she was begging but she really just wanted her Janet to be taken care of by the one person she knew in her heart was meant for Janet.

"Yeah I came here yesterday to check on Janet and don't worry I will make sure she is eating and taking care of herself." Just then he looked at Janet and winked.

He continued, "I will help her get the house ready for Mrs. Edwardson to return and help Janet move back to the Ridge. What are friends for right?" Eddie knew that Janet's grandma had not said a word on the other end and was having this conversation for Janet's ears and also to let Edith know that he would take good care of her grand daughter. She already knew that Eddie loved her and would do anything to make sure she was ok but he also knew that he and Janet had a lot of things to talk about and there needed to be time for them to find their way back to the love they once shared. He was convinced to see this through because for the first time in his life he was sure that Janet was the one person he wanted forever with.

"Ok, Edith well I just brought in lunch so Janet will give you a call a little later and get more details about Mrs. Edwardson's return. It was good to talk to you also. Take care, Edith." With that Eddie hung up the phone. Edith put the phone down on the other end and turned to speak to Janet's grandpa.

"Eddie is with Janet. I have a feeling that our grand daughter is going to be just fine sweetie. That boy loves her I am sure of it now." Edith had a few tears in her eyes but they were very happy tears. She knew in time that Janet would be truly happy again and be with the one she was meant to be with. "Now let's go check on Mrs. Edwardson."

Back in Hope, Janet looked at Eddie who had just hung up the phone and walked back into the kitchen like he just had a conversation with Nick.

Eddie looked at Janet realizing that maybe she had some questions judging by the look on her face.

"I'm sorry did you want to talk with her again. I think she was just concerned about you but I wanted her to know that I was here to help. She seemed ok I think." Eddie didn't want to give too much away.

"But she knows that I haven't talked to you in over a year did she sound surprised?" Janet was surprised that he took the phone in the first place. She wasn't even sure if Eddie wanted her to tell her grandma about him being there but now apparently he was so comfortable with her grandma he talked to her as if they have been friends for years. Janet just sat there once again like "who is this guy". What had happened to the guy that once refused to go see her grandparents because he didn't want to hang out with old people or be inconvenienced in any way. She began to wonder what had happened in that year that she was away. She was starting to wonder if what she had thought was happening with Eddie had actually happened. Maybe she had been wrong all along, maybe he hadn't moved on from her, maybe there was no other relationship, maybe there was so much more to Eddie then she realized and maybe now he realized it too.

She thought to herself, "Yeah we are going to talk, You and I, Eddie and not only are you going to hear about what has been going on with me but I am most definitely going to find out about what you have been doing all this time. "

Eddie began to worry a little because she was looking at him in such an intense way it made him a bit nervous. He thought, "Did she pick up on something? Would she suspect that I had just come from her grandparent's nursing home? Don't worry Janet we will have time to talk about all of it – I won't keep secrets from you ever again – but right now I need to make sure you are taken care of and keep the promise I made to your grandparent – which is what I intend to do."

"Ok so let's eat." Eddie finally said to try and break that intense stare.

Janet decided that she would let it go for now because those burgers did smell good and she really couldn't remember the last time she had eaten. Suddenly she looked at Eddie and said so sincerely… 

"Thanks Eddie. Thanks for coming and giving me your friendship. I know this may not have been the best situation but I don't feel so alone any more so thank you for that."

Eddie looked at Janet and smiled. "Where else would I be Janet?" With that they sat at the table in the kitchen and began to eat. Each feeling hopeful for their futures for the first time in a long time, for the first time in a year they both felt that maybe just maybe the great love story of Janet and Eddie may just have a sequel.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16:

As the days went by Janet started to feel more and more like herself. The pain of her loss was slowly starting to lesson and she knew as the day approached when Mrs. Edwardson would return to her home that Janet would need to return to her home as well, in the Ridge.

Janet thought as she sat on the front porch enjoying the early morning sun rise in Hope how much she would miss the people in this town but yet she was feeling more hopeful about her life in the Ridge. Eddie was a big part of that feeling. She didn't know how she would have gotten through all of this without him being there. She never would have dreamt that he would just show up as he did and be such a support. But there he was, no more anger, no more hurt in his eyes no there was nothing but caring and concern in his eyes. She really had missed him and everyday that he spent with her it became even more apparent that he had missed her too.

Just then Eddie came out the door and looked over to see Janet sitting in the spot that he was growing to understand as her second favorite place to relax…the first being the all season's porch over looked the garden.

"Hey, what are ya doing up so early?" Eddie said smiling

"I just wanted to see the sun rise…I won't be able to do this after Friday when Mrs. Edwardson comes home." Janet said only slightly smiling

Eddie looked at her trying to figure out what she was thinking.

"So what are your plans…are you going to leave before she gets home or wait until she is settled in first." Eddie was trying to decide how to approach what he really wants to say.

"I think Mrs. Edwardson's daughter is coming here before she goes to pick her mother up at the nursing home so I was just planning on leaving before she got here. I would feel like I was intruding if I stayed." Janet said distantly

"So that means you want to leave on Wednesday then?"

"Yeah I think that would be best. What are your plans? Don't you need to go back to the Ridge and work? You have been here for two weeks Eddie. I really appreciate you being here and can not thank you enough for coming but I don't want to get in the way of your life, especially since…" Janet paused slightly to think of what she wanted to say but Eddie began talking…

"Janet I meant what I said to you when I got here. I am here for you and there are no time limits on that. I don't know if you remember but I happen to own the company that I work in so I have a little say in how long I get to be off, besides Nick is doing a great job with the contracts and Ikey is handling the installations so everything is just fine. But I have been thinking…" Eddie wants so badly to talk about their relationship but doesn't know if she is ready.

"I didn't know that Ikey is working for you…does that mean that you have forgiven him?" Janet suddenly felt optimistic that maybe there was a chance for her too.

"After I was attacked by Big Cat's goons, Ikey was the one who interrupted the attack and called the ambulance. He sat in the hospital with me…I guess through it all I realized that we all make mistakes and Ikey and I have a lot of history. It took some time but all things given enough time Janet can be forgiven. Owen and Allison worked through everything, it took some time but they were able to forgive each other…even Owen and Ikey have been able to move past all of it. Life is hard Janet without the ones you love around you. That is a lesson I learned very well when you left." Eddie said the last sentence more softly but he wanted her know.

Janet sat there and stared at Eddie. Was she ready to have this conversation? She had just lost Dwayne only months ago but yet Eddie held that place in her heart…could it be possible that he had forgiven her too? She decided that now was probably a good time to find out.

"Eddie maybe we should talk about how things were left when I left." Janet looked at Eddie

He said, "I don't want to push you Janet if you're not ready but if you are ready than I would really like to talk about it but first there is something that I need to say. I'm sorry Janet for how I treated you that day in the hospital. It was so out of line and I have regretted those words since they left my mouth…I hope you know that I would never want you to go away. When I found out you were gone it was like a feeling worse than the beating I took. Janet I know that we can't go back and change anything that happened but I want you to know that I have forgiven you, a long time ago actually, for what happened with Rooster and I am hoping that you have forgiven me for how I treated you the day Rory came back to the Ridge." Eddie looked at Janet at that moment to see if he could read her face.

Janet looked at Eddie and could not believe what she had just heard. He had forgiven her and wanted her forgiveness? That she was not expecting. She hadn't really thought about Eddie needing forgiveness because what she did she saw as being the most devastating mistake and betrayal. What would she say? The tears began to form in her eyes.

"Eddie I never thought about you needing forgiveness because what I did was so awful. I feel horrible about what I did and I…" Janet just didn't know what to say

"Janet what I did to you that day…it was just as bad. I never should have kept her visit from you and I never should have kept my relationship with you to myself. I should have let her know right away that I was in love with you and the kiss would never have happened…the kiss that you saw that ended our relationship." Eddie would have continued but Janet spoke up

"You were in love with me?" Janet said it so quietly as if she was afraid of what he would say.

"No Janet, … I am in love with you…I knew it then but I didn't know what to do…partly because I had never felt that way about anyone and it scared me…I didn't know what to think or where it would go but Janet living with out you is something that I just can't do. There is no one else I would rather be with then you. That is what I learned while you were gone that I was a complete failure at making sure that you knew how important you were and are to me. If I hadn't been such a jerk, always unsure about everything then we would not have wasted this last year being apart. I don't mean to diminish your relationship with Dwayne…I mean I know that you loved him and I didn't mean that I didn't want that to happen…(Eddie was stumbling a bit)…ahh geez Janet this is just not coming out right." Eddie puts his head in his hands.

Janet gets up and goes to sit next to Eddie. She grabbed his hand and took it in hers. He looked up and turned to face her with tears in his eyes. She smiled and said, 

"Eddie I know what you meant. I did love Dwayne but he knew that we would never have the relationship that we deserved because he knew his time on this earth was limited. When I told him about you and I back when we were just friends he knew than that there was something between us that was special but that both of us may not have been ready for it. He made me promise to talk with you and give us a chance to have the possibility of forever. So, Eddie I know what you meant but maybe this was all suppose to be the way it was. Maybe Eddie I needed to come here to find myself and Dwayne was a part of that and you were meant to be with out me so you could find yourself in a way too. Maybe we needed to be apart to understand how to be together." Janet looked at Eddie for his reaction

Eddie squeezed her hand and said, "So do you think maybe when you are ready that we can start over. Do you think that we have that chance to be with each other, truly with each other this time, no hesitation, no uncertainty, no reservations – just you and me?" Eddie looked like his whole life depended on her answer, in some ways it did.

"I think I can manage that, Eddie." With that the two leaned towards one another and kissed ever so gently.

They both leaned into one another's arms. Right now they just wanted to be close and for now that was enough. That is how they remained until Eddie stomach started to growl and he looked and Janet with a big grin. Janet said, "Well I guess some things haven't changed. Let's go get something to eat." With that the two headed into the house.

Several hours later, Janet and Eddie were in the back yard, Eddie was moving the lawn and Janet was in the garden doing some weeding. She didn't want Mrs. Edwardson to return to a garden full of flowers and weeds and Eddie just couldn't stand the length of the grass knowing that Mrs. Edwardson would have enough of a transition coming home without her husband that the last thing she needed to worry about was the lawn. Eddie liked the feeling of being outside and working on the lawn with Janet in the garden. He looked over to Janet in the garden and thought to himself, "this is how it is supposed to be…this is what I want for the rest of my life…one day Janet you will have your own garden full of flowers to remind you of how much I love you…this I promise you."

Janet looked over the flowers and got lost her own thoughts, "I made a promise to you Dwayne to keep you in my heart and I will forever but you were right. Eddie wasn't lost to me…he didn't move on with his life as I thought…he was in love with me and you knew that all along didn't you…you will always be a part of me Dwayne and I will never regret spending the time we did together but I think I am ready to open that part of my heart that belonged to Eddie... I think you always knew that this is how it was supposed to be - you helped me see that and so much more about myself. The one thing you were wrong about was my forever because you gave me my forever Dwayne because you made it possible for Eddie to come back into my life…because you believed in me and made me believe in myself…you gave us our forever" as she looked over to Eddie to find him looking at her smiling she couldn't help but smile back. She looked up to the sky and kissed her palm and raised it to the sky with a big smile on her face just for Dwayne.

As they made their way back into the house to clean up and get ready for dinner, they both had this feeling of ease and comfort knowing that their relationship was on the mend. They both felt as though the future wasn't so scary anymore because they knew above all else that they would have each other.

Hours later, after they had both showered, made and ate supper and everything was cleaned up they just sat together for a bit and snuggled. They knew that it would take time to move their relationship forward but just being with each other in this simplest way felt so amazing.

"Can I ask you something?" Eddie said cautiously

"Sure you can ask me anything…" Janet saw the look on his face and was concerned

"I was thinking about our conversation earlier this morning and I just wanted to ask you something. I know that you agreed to give our relationship another chance and I am ok with going slowly and for us to get to know each other again but the best night sleep I have had since you left a year ago was when we slept on the couch together the first night I was here. Not that I am saying we should sleep on the couch but being without you for the last year I just don't know that I can go through that again. I guess what I am getting at is how would you feel about sleeping in each other arms every night…I am not talking about sex or anything like that…I mean not until your ready…but just being with each other…that is what I want." Eddie was wondering if it was too soon to ask her this but if there was even a small chance that she would agree he had to take the chance.

Janet sat there and looked at him. She didn't really need time to think about what he had said. The thought of being near him again just cuddling and knowing that they were both committed to building a stronger relationship than they had before well that sounded perfect to her.

Janet stood up and held out her hand. She said, "I am pretty tired so what do ya say we say good night." She smiled.

Eddie would have broken something if he had gotten up any faster. His smile was so big he couldn't contain his emotions.

They got ready for bed and both got in on their respective sides, some things hadn't changed. It seemed a little awkward at first but just then Eddie opened his arms and Janet snuggled in. Eddie kissed the top of her head and said, "good night." With that they fell sound asleep. Neither one had dreams that night because everything that they had ever wanted was right there in each other's arms.

In the morning they both woke in the same position they drifted off to sleep in. Once again having had an amazing night of sleep they were both ready for the challenge of the day, that was packing all of Janet's things to get ready for her return to the Ridge.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17:

They packed the last box into Janet's Jeep and returned to the house to look around one last time. The day had finally arrived that Janet would return to Knight's Ridge. It had been quite a journey for her coming to Hope and meeting all the people who changed her life for the better, especially Dwayne. She would take with her both good memories and sad ones. The memory of saying good bye to Dwayne being the worst but having to say good bye to her friends she had made was almost as bad.

The night before Janet was scheduled to leave she returned to Big Jim's for one last meal. She hadn't worked there since Dwayne had gotten so sick. Jim was so sad for her and what she was going through but yet he was also sad to give up the best bartender he had ever had. The regulars were just as sad as they so enjoyed Janet being there. Janet took Eddie to Big Jim's for some burgers and for her to say goodbye. She knew that this was something she had to do but dreaded it.

Everyone was so happy to see her. It was like a non stop parade of people coming over to her and Eddie while they sat by the bar and attempted to eat their burgers. Eddie just smiled at how much love this town had for her. It was obvious that she had made quite an impact on these people in her time here. He only wished that the Ridge would be that way as he knew that the people in the Ridge could often times be cruel and he never really understood why because Janet was such an amazing person. If only they could see what he and all these people clearly saw in her perhaps she wouldn't have been so quick to leave in the first place.

Janet introduced Eddie to her friends as her "friend from the Ridge". Eddie knew why she had done that but it still felt somewhat like being punched in the stomach. He needed to remind himself of the discussion about time frames and when she was ready. Maybe she wasn't as ready for their relationship to advance as he was. He tried not to think about it much because they would return to the Ridge and he would be able to talk to her some more about it. He was just happy being with her even if she thought of them as friends for now, she was back in his life and he couldn't be happier about it.

After what seemed like a thousand hugs, and that was just from Big Jim, they were able to go home. Janet was exhausted and emotionally drained from all the heart felt well wishes she had received. As they lay in bed together that night Janet was so thankful for their sleeping arrangement. She felt so comfortable in Eddie's arms and so safe. She knew things would be different when they returned to the Ridge and she was hoping for the opportunity to talk to Eddie about how their relationship would or could progress. She was very happy that Eddie was back in her life and looked forward to seeing where it would go. Eddie seemed so different to her and she liked the changes very much but she also needed to continue the changes she made within herself as well. No more self doubts and feelings of unworthiness. She would return to her life in the Ridge with confidence and self assuredness because she was worthy of all the good things that were happening to her…Dwayne always said that and now she believed it to be true.

She snuggled into Eddie's arms as she did every night since their talk and was just about to drift off to sleep when Eddie began to talk.

"Are you sleepy or can we talk for a minute." Eddie asked

"Sure if you want to talk…" Janet said with a yawn

"I know that you are tired so I will make it quick but I was thinking that maybe when we head out tomorrow we could stop and see your grands before we head back. Your grandma seemed to be worried about ya and I think a visit would help put her mind at ease…what do ya think?" Eddie knew that this was an easy sell but really felt like Edith would want to see them and Eddie wanted her to see that he kept his word.

Janet smiled loving the idea of visiting her grands and their way home but also that Eddie suggested it. "That sounds like a great idea Eddie. Thanks for thinking of it. I would love to see my grands before we head home."

With that Eddie simply replied, "ok it is settled then" He kissed the top of her head as he had done every night since they began sharing a bed and both fell asleep quickly.

When they arose, everything seemed different. Eddie was so excited he nearly leapt out of bed. This was not so normal for him but he appeared to be very happy to be going home. Janet on the other hand was a bit more apprehensive about getting up. This day was going to mean a lot to her. Closing a chapter in her life, saying good bye to Dwayne for the final time and leaving behind all the pain that she came to Hope with.

Janet just looked at Eddie as he began to throw his clothes back in his back and run around the house as if he was a kid on Christmas morning. She couldn't blame him he had been gone from the Ridge for nearly a month staying with her. Even Hannah was shocked at his dedication to help her through this time. Everyone seemed to notice the change in Eddie and definitely were in favor of it. Knowing how miserable he was before when Janet was gone – his friends could not have been happier for him knowing that his relationship with Janet was on the mend. Truth be told, many people in Knight's Ridge were happy that she was returning. It turns out that more than just Eddie missed their favorite bartender named Janet. Janet didn't know it yet but things were going to be different when she came home to the Ridge.

Janet stood in the all season's porch and looked around at the flowers out the window and the couch that she had shared so much with Dwayne. She knew the time had come to say goodbye but it wouldn't be forever. She still had his ashes and she would do with them exactly as he asked of her so he would be with her always that much she was sure but it was time for her to move on with the rest of her life. A life she truly hoped that would include Eddie, children, a home and a beautiful garden of her own one day.

She looked at Eddie as he walked up to her and put his arms around her from behind. He said, "Are you ready to go?"

"Yeah, it's time for me to go home." With that she turned to Eddie and kissed him ever so gently on the lips and walked away leaving Eddie definitely wanting more. Eddie thought to himself, "I can not wait to get home…soon we are going to talk about this relationship Janet and when you are ready not only are there going to be changes made but the first one on my list is your last name." With that they both walked out of the house, got in their respective vehicles and drove off to Providence to see Janet's Grands.

The visit with Janet's grandparents went really well. Edith was so happy to see Eddie and Janet walk in, hand in hand. She knew by the look on Eddie's face that their relationship had changed and for the better. She didn't press for details of Janet but she knew in her heart that it wouldn't be long before her grand daughter would find the happiness she so longed for when she showed up a year earlier. Mrs. Edwardson was so grateful for what Janet had done for her she just couldn't stop hugging her. Janet just smiled knowing that her trip to Hope was just as much of a gift to her as anything Mrs. Edwardson tried to give Janet for staying in her home.

Eddie and Janet left the nursing home and headed back towards the Ridge. Eddie so much wished that they had been able to be in the same vehicle because he had so much to say but he thought that there would be plenty of time for that.

They arrived at Janet's house hours later and both were pretty tired. Eddie and Janet started the process of unloading all the boxes and bags that Janet had brought. Janet tried to send Eddie home to get some sleep but he wouldn't budge. He was serious when he told her that he didn't want to spend another night without her and that included once they returned to the Ridge. Janet didn't want to assume that he would just stay there but she did certainly hope that he would want to stay and when he refused to go home she knew that maybe he would want to stay. She had grown very used to him being with her and she wasn't sure that she wanted to sleep alone any longer either.

After all the boxes were unloaded and just placed in the dining room, Janet said, "I will unpack all of this in the morning. I don't know about you but I am so tired. I am going to change the bedding and get everything ready so I can go to bed."

Eddie stood there not knowing how to say that he wanted for her to invite him to stay. He was trying to think of what he wanted to say when Janet spoke, "you are probably really tired as well, maybe it would be a good idea that you stay here tonight and get a good night's sleep…" Janet looked at him as if trying to figure out if she had gone too far.

Eddie smiled a big smile, "that sounds great. I'll just go get my bag and I'll be back in to help ya with the sheets." He ran out the door and came back in with his bag so quickly, it was as if he didn't want her to change her mind.

Janet had just gotten to the bedroom and began stripping the bed. Suddenly imagines of Rooster and her filled her mind. She hadn't thought of all of that in so long so just burst into tears. Eddie came walking into her room and saw her tears and could not understand what he missed. He then walked up to her and said, "Hey, hey babe what is wrong? Talk to me and tell me what is making you so upset." He was genuinely concerned.

Janet just looked at him with tear filled eyes. She thought, "If I say something is he going to leave? Now that we are home can we really go back…I just don't know." She could feel her confidence waiver just a bit. Suddenly Eddie grabbed the sheets out of her hands, pulled her into his chest and kissed her with such a passion she nearly forgot what she was so upset about. They had not kissed quite like this since he arrived on her door step in Hope so she was a bit taken off guard.

Eddie stopped and pulled a way from Janet just a bit, "Listen to me Janet. I know that being back in this place that holds such good and bad memories is overwhelming for you right now. You haven't been here for a year but I don't want you to worry about what happened here OK. I told you I made peace with it a long time ago so maybe now you should. We can't change the past Janet but we are here to begin our future so please let's not start them with tears." Eddie was being so sincere.

Janet just looked at him trying to understand how it was possible for Eddie to have understood what she was feeling and then say all the right things in that very moment. She felt as though she fell in love with him all over again in that moment.

"Ok Eddie…now hand me those sheets from over there and lets get ready for bed, I am exhausted." Janet said trying to wipe her face and calm herself down more.

"I second that." Eddie said with a rise of his eyebrows and a smirk

In a matter of minutes the new sheets were on, the bed was remade and all the lights had been turned off in the house and doors locked. Janet was already in bed and Eddie was just getting in. Janet said, "Thanks Eddie for all that you have done for me. I'll get there Eddie I promise you I'll get there."

Eddie just smiled and snuggled into Janet so tightly. "I know you will Janet and I'll be right here when you do." With that the two fell asleep knowing that the days ahead would be filled with challenges but the one thing they would have to face each challenge was each other.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18:

Eddie awoke in the morning and thought that he should at least go into work for a while to catch up on what had been going on while he was gone. They were home now and he would have to resume his life as it was before only this time he would have her to come home too each night, or at least that was his plan.

He got up and took a shower and got ready for the day. When he was ready to go, Janet was still sleeping. After all she didn't have anywhere to go so why wake her but he couldn't help but want to kiss her good bye. He leaned down and gently kissed her lips. She stirred a bit but didn't fully wake up so he just smiled and let a little note. He left that morning feeling happier than he had in a while.

Eddie got to BFW and Nick and Ikey were already there. They were a bit surprised to see him and especially surprised to see the smile on his face as they hadn't seen that in over a year.

"Well Well look who is back…when did you get back to the Ridge?" Nick asked smiling

"We got back last night. I thought I would come in for a bit and see what you dorks have been up to since the boss was gone." Eddie was chuckling and smiling

"We didn't screw anything up if that is what you mean…what's with the "we" Ikey said clearly digging for information

"Ummm Janet and me, who else would I mean?" Eddie just shook his head

"Well it is good to have ya back. So anything that you want to talk about in regards to Janet…have you two crazy kids worked things out." Nick was so hoping that was the case because it had been hard to see his best friend so down these past 12 months.

"You know Nicky, things are good…they aren't exactly where I want them to be just yet but I am hopeful that before long they will be. She is home though so yeah I am good." Eddie just couldn't help himself with the smiling.

"Ok then lets get you all caught up on what needs to be done" and with that the three friends and co workers went over the business end of BFW.

Janet woke up several hours later than Eddie had and felt a little disoriented at first. She looked around the room and saw a different picture than she had the day before. It took her a second to realize that she was home, back in the Ridge, and she was alone. She looked over at where Eddie was the last time she saw him and there was a note on the pillow. She just smiled before realizing that it wasn't a dream earlier when she felt like Eddie kissed her that he must have before he left for work. She leaned over and looked at the note:

"Good morning sunshine. I decided to head into work for a few hours to get caught up on things so I thought I would let you sleep some. You looked so peaceful I didn't have the heart to wake you up but I did steal a kiss. Keep your evening open as I plan to take you out to dinner. I am so happy that we are home Janet and so looking forward to what comes next for us. Talk to you later. Love you, Eddie."

Janet just stared at the piece of paper with this big ridiculous smile. There was something about seeing the words "love you" from him that just made her so happy. She had only dreamt of that when they were together before. He never wrote her notes like this before. She realized that things had changed while she was gone but definitely for the better.

She decided to get up and work on unpacking all the boxes that were stacked in the dining room. She got dressed in some sweats and headed to the kitchen to make some coffee when the door bell went off. She walked over to the door and opened it. Standing there was Hannah with two big coffee's smiling. "Good morning Janet I am so glad you are home." She walked in and hugged Janet still holding the coffees in her hands.

Janet happily hugged her back and took the coffee. Hannah than said, "oh by the way these are directly from Sully's and he told me to tell you that he is more than happy that you are back home and you can start today if you like." Hannah laughed knowing that Sully was only kidding but he did really want her to come back and work there. Everyone had missed her so much including Sully himself.

Janet just laughed and took a sip of her coffee. "That Sully. I really should go in there and say hi. I do plan on going back but I have to get all these stuff unpacked and put away. I just want a little more time to get settled you know?" Janet said motioned to all the boxes and everything around her.

Hannah said, "I am sure he knows that Janet he just seemed very happy to hear that you were back in the Ridge. This place just hasn't been the same with out you!"

Just then Janet said, "Oh and thank you Hannah for taking such good care of my house. There is hardly any dust anywhere and the furniture actually looks like it has been getting some use. I can't thank you enough for that. I thought I would come back here and have to clean the several inches of dust and cobwebs off of everything." Janet was genuinely appreciative of Hannah's thoughtfulness.

Hannah sat there for a bit and said, "I am sorry honey but that wasn't me." She looked at Janet's confused expression.

"It seems as though you had someone else who had been coming here and keeping up the place. As it turns out when Eddie got overwhelmed by his feelings, whatever they were, he would come here to deal with them. He never told anyone about it but I figured it out when you came home for my wedding and you thanked me for getting your house ready – I didn't get the chance to come over here so I knew someone else had done it. When Eddie called me before he showed up in Hope I confronted him about it and he admitted to coming here several times while you were gone. He said it was the only place that he felt close to you as he couldn't go to Sully's and he just wanted to be near you in some way."

Janet once again had tears in her eyes. How could she have been so wrong about him. She had always thought that he had moved on with his life and started dating Rory or someone else but she never imagined that he would be feeling lost because she wasn't there. She never thought that they would ever be able to talk again or be friends or anything really. She had completely closed down the thought that there was any chance to reconcile because of what she had done. She truly thought that he hated her. Now she knew that it was exactly the opposite and really started to feel badly that she had once again hurt him by leaving.

Hannah looked at her friend and could see that she was struggling with something. She grabbed Janet's hand and said, "Hey what is with the tears? You are home now and you are talking at least to Eddie so everything else will work itself out. I have no doubt Janet that he loves you. You shouldn't either because he drove all the way to Hope to be with you. He is not the same Eddie that you left a year ago."

Janet got up and went to her room and shortly thereafter came back with a note in her hand. She gave it to Hannah and said, "I know that now…so what do I do?" Janet looked at Hannah as if begging her for some advice.

Hannah was surprised by what Eddie had written in the letter. She had never known him to write things like that before. She looked at Janet and said finally, "Janet he loves you…it says so right here so don't worry about what to do…it'll all work out when you are both ready just let it happen naturally. I have no doubt in my mind that you will be walking down that isle – maybe sooner than me." Hannah giggled a little.

Janet looked at Hannah like she was insane. "I don't know about that but I would like to see where this relationship is headed. I am feeling better everyday Hannah and I think I may be ready for us to have that talk that Eddie keeps bringing up. I know that he is waiting for me to tell him that I am over my relationship with Dwayne. I loved Dwayne Hannah but I know that this is what he wanted me to do and he wouldn't want me to wollow in my sadness. I need to move on with my life and I want to do that with Eddie. That much I am sure. There is just one more thing I have to do first before I do that." Janet looked at Hannah with that intense look.

"What is that?" Hannah still had no clue

"Do you remember like a week after Dwayne died I had to go see that lawyer, Mr. Bailey to settle his estate?"

"Oh yeah I do remember that…I had forgotten all about that…what did the lawyer say?" Hannah was curious

"He gave me an envelope and told me that that envelope was the remainder of his estate and that it was willed to me. I haven't been able to open that envelope yet. I feel like I need to before I can totally commit myself to beginning a more serious relationship with Eddie. Does that make sense?" Janet looked to Hannah

Hannah said, "Yeah it does make sense but why haven't you opened it yet? What do you think it is?"

"I don't know I never talked to Dwayne about that stuff. We dated only a short time before he really got sick and when he wanted to talk about stuff like that I just changed the subject. I didn't really think that he would leave everything to me." Janet was talking with her hands at this point obviously uncomfortable about this subject still.

"So why don't you open it now and see what it says." Hannah said rather simply

Janet got up and went to the box that was listed Dwayne. She had put all of his things that she had including the envelope, the letter he wrote her and his urn. She was so apprehensive about this and couldn't figure out why.

Janet walked back over by Hannah and sat down next to her. "Ok here goes." Hannah sat there intently watching as she opened the envelope and watched as Janet scanned it for its contents. It had a box about the size of a ring and some other pieces of jewelry just sitting in the bottom. A necklace that obviously was Dwayne's, she remembered him wearing it and some gold bracelets. She opened the box and in it she found the most beautiful sapphire and diamond ring. It wasn't an engagement ring , it looked more like a cocktail ring or an anniversary ring.

Janet found yet another letter from Dwayne.

"Hey babe, I know that by now you are probably wondering why I left everything that was important to me to you. The answer is very simple. You were the person who brought me to life when God was taking it away. I merely existed before you came along. I don't have much family left as you probably figured out at the funeral. I want you to use what I left you on something that will make you happy. You talked about so many things in our time together so I want you to have all the things you want but most of all I want you to be happy. The ring belonged to my mother and since I was an only child it is my birth stone. My father bought it for her when I was born. She gave it to me to give to someone who meant as much to me as I did to her. She died of the same illness that I have. My father passed away a few years later so it was just me. I wanted you to have it. I hope that when you look at it you remember only the good memories of our time together and that you were the love of my life. I truly hope that you find that love for yourself and live your life to the fullest. Live the life I couldn't Janet and enjoy all the moments. I will be forever grateful that you came into my life when you did. I look forward to seeing that smile every day when you create the garden of your dreams with your true love just as Mrs. Edwardson did with hers. All my love, Dwayne

P.S No more tears Janet – only happy memories remember. It is time for you to live…."

Janet didn't cry this time. She did have tears in her eyes but they didn't get any further. She smiled and looked up to the sky. She would never be able to give back to him all that he had given her but she decided she would wear that ring as a reminder to live her life and be happy always as that is what Dwayne wanted most of her.

Hannah looked at her and said "so what is in there." Janet opened the box and took the ring out. She placed it on her right hand ring finger and it was a perfect fit. Hannah almost fell off the couch it was the most beautiful ring she had ever seen. It was princess cut Sapphire ring with diamonds on either side of it as well as in the silver band that the stones were placed in. It had an antique feel to it but it was a perfect fit to Janet's personality. Simple yet stunning.

Hannah just stared at it then spoke, "Wow that is really a gorgeous ring Janet. See that wasn't so bad."

Janet just then took the envelope out that was in the bigger envelope and opened it up. She found a check in the envelope and immediately she began to cry. She could not even stop her bodies reaction to the gift that Dwayne had given her.

Hannah just looked at Janet and then took the envelope out of her hand and looked at the check inside. Dwayne had left Janet all of his life's savings and life insurance policy that his parents had taken out on him when he was a baby far before he was diagnosed with Lou Gehrig's disease. Truth be told Dwayne's mother suspected that he had a chance of getting the illness that she had so she wanted the family that he may have one day to be taken care of. She knew once he was diagnosed he would never be able to get life insurance. Dwayne had never settled down or had children because he didn't want them to have to face the illness that would cut his own life short and potentially any child he had.

In the envelope, the check was written out to Janet Meadows for $150,000. She had no idea what to say or do. Hannah was struggling with that herself. Both of them could not conceive of such a dollar amount of money. Janet decided that this check would return to the envelope and be put away until she was really ready to deal with it. She also thought of Eddie and what he would say seeing something like that. He was a proud man and she felt that he would be very upset by that amount of money being given to her by her former boyfriend who happened to be in love with her. She just didn't know what to do about it.

"What am I going to do with this Hannah? Eddie is not going to like it at all. I don't want to push him away now that we are getting back on track with our relationship or the possibility of a relationship." Janet was just baffled.

Hannah said, "You are going to have to tell him at some point but I don't see why it is important for you to do it right now. You will know when the time in right. I do think though you should at least put it in your account so it can draw interest. Maybe one day you and Eddie can buy a house or something together or honestly do anything with it. What an amazing gift he gave you Janet." Hannah was genuinely impressed with the generosity of Dwayne and what this could mean for her future.

"I am going to have to tell him Hannah and if history has taught me anything it is to face things head on, this is not something to spring on the man." Janet said honestly.

Janet thought, "For better or worse he has to know. How he reacts well that remains to be seen. I guess we will see just how much he has changed."

"Now, can you help me with the rest of this stuff?" Janet asked Hannah trying to get her mind off of the huge elephant now in the room

Eddie was finishing up reviewing all the window contracts for the upcoming month and got the schedule worked out with Ikey on what jobs they would work on next and got their schedule set. It felt good to get back to work and find some normalcy in his life again. He didn't realize how much he missed being at work and feeling like he had accomplished something. But if he was being honest he really wanted to finish up because he had the added bonus of being able to see Janet and that was the high light of his day.

Eddie picked up his cell phone and decided to check on his favorite person.

"Hey there beautiful. What are you up too today?" Eddie said smiling into the phone.

"Hi. How is work going for you? Sorry I didn't wake up when you left. I must have been out cold. I did get your note though." Janet returned the smile.

"We just finished up here so I was hoping that I could talk you into going out for dinner tonight…what do ya say." Eddie was so hoping she would accept.

"Yeah I think I could manage dinner with you (she giggled). I have been trying to get through these boxes today so I am pretty dirty right now. Can you give me an hour to clean up a bit first?" Janet was hoping that he wouldn't be too upset.

"Absolutely, I'll be over in around an hour or so. You can pick anywhere you want to go – even that French restaurant if you want." Eddie said being so charming.

"You know where I would really like to go is Sully's…how do you feel about that? I missed that place." Janet wasn't really in the mood for a fancy French restaurant.

"You know what that sounds perfect to me. See you soon Janet." With that Eddie shut his phone and headed out of BFW.

It didn't take Janet long to take a shower and get cleaned up. She had gotten most of the boxes emptied and her things put away. Hannah had helped her for several hours and taken most of the empty boxes away when she had left.

Janet started thinking about what Hannah had said earlier about how Eddie was the one that had taken care of her home when she was gone. She thought about what it would be like to live in a different home than this one. It held so much history for her but what if she wanted new memories not history. What if she and Eddie were able to begin again without all this history – one that didn't include her past mistake with Rooster and his past mistake with Rory. A place where the slate was clean and they could make their own good memories without the bad ones. A future filled with possibilities…a home that they created not decided upon. Maybe now was a great time for Janet to move on from her past and start to live her life the way she really wanted to. Maybe an old Victorian house with an all season porch and a big garden…who knows, her possibilities seemed endless now.

Janet thought, "Well maybe I should start with the possibility that is currently knocking on the door." Janet chuckled to herself as she was brought out of her thoughts by the person standing at the door, the person who was at the heart of her possibilities.


	19. Chapter 19

(This chapter is dedicated to all of you Jeddie fans…I hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it!)

Chapter 19:

Eddie stood outside of Janet's doorway waiting for her to open the door. He had become so used to just going into her house and it being cold and dark that he was excited with the prospect of her finally being home.

Janet opened the door and kind of looked at Eddie in an awkward way. "You know you could just come in, you really don't have to knock." Janet said and smiled at Eddie

Eddie thought, "That smile…man how I missed that smile." Eddie walked through the door and took Janet into his arms. He kissed her just as he had the evening before. This time though the kiss lasted a little longer than before. Eddie noticed that Janet didn't seem to want to pull away and was just as involved in the kiss as he was. This lasted for several minutes until they both were out of breath.

Janet stepped back just a bit and looked up into Eddie's eyes. Eddie smiled at her with the biggest smile he had all day and the two just looked at each other for a brief second, than Janet spoke.

"Well that was quite a how was your day?" she giggled a bit

"No it was more like a I missed you so much today" Eddie said a bit more seriously.

"I missed you too Eddie."

"So are you ready to go to Sully's?" Eddie said knowing that if this conversation went any further they may never leave for dinner and there were still some things he wanted to feel out with her.

"Yep I sure am." Janet smiled and grabbed her purse. Eddie took her hand and they headed for his truck and then straight to Sully's.

It was as if the whole town knew she would be coming back tonight because the place was packed. Janet walked in and it was as if everyone stopped what they were doing and began to make their way over to her to say hi. Janet was a bit overwhelmed by the reaction as she never felt like the townspeople in the Ridge felt that way about her. Eddie just smiled and took a little step back so everyone could give her their hugs and say hi. He made his way to a booth that was somewhat in the corner and signaled to Janet when she was ready where he was. He just sat there staring at what was happening. Janet was finally able to see just how much people missed her and cared about her. She was no longer Janet the planet but Janet their favorite bartender and care taker to the regulars of Sully's, but more importantly to him she was Janet the woman he loved. Tonight he was hoping to have that conversation that he had been wanting to have all along. Perhaps tonight she would be so much more.

Janet made her way to the bar and saw Sully. She walked behind the bar and gave him a big hug. He was so happy to see her he hugged her back just as big. He let her go and said, "It is so good to see ya back here Janet. The place hasn't been the same…at least that is what these people have been saying since they found out you moved away. So are ya home for good?" That was Sully always getting to the point.

"Yeah Sully I am home for good. I have missed this place." Janet said as she looked around and quickly glanced at Eddie giving him a wink.

"Well you know that you are welcome to come back anytime you want their darlin." Sully could not have been more serious.

"You know what, if you can give me some time to get adjusted in my house I will be more than happy to come back…I would love it in fact." Janet said touching the top of his arm.

"You got it…just let me know when you are ready." With that Sully left to go tend the bar himself.

Janet grabbed a couple of beers and headed to the table. Eddie scooted over as to have her sit next to him. She caught on and sat right beside him. He put his arm around her and grabbed the quickest of hugs. He had something on his mind and he really needed to talk to Janet about it.

"So how was your day today? Did you get everything worked out at work?" Janet asked as she casually drank from her beer.

"Yeah we got our schedules worked out for the month. So I was thinking today that maybe after we eat you and I could talk some. I have some things I wanted to tell ya and some things I wanted to ask ya but I don't really want to do it here…I think we would get interrupted way to much." Eddie said rather cautiously but with intent.

"Sure we can do that later. You make it sound so important…please tell me nothing is wrong because I am not sure if I can take that again." She was somewhat kidding yet sensed that he had a serious discussion on his mind.

"Janet you don't have to worry about me but how are you doing with all of that? With Dwayne?" Ok he didn't really want to get into it here but it seemed to just come out.

Janet looked at him and knew instantly what he was looking for. She placed her hand on his cheek and said, "I am ok Eddie. I made my peace with Dwayne's passing before we left Hope. I did love him Eddie and always will but he is a part of my past and not my future. He wanted me to be happy and live my life and that is exactly what I intend on doing. Do you understand?" Janet looked at Eddie as if to judge what he was thinking.

Eddie sat there and listened to every word she said. With each word he became more and more excited. He was so hoping that she would say even a fraction of what she just had. He knew that tonight would be the night that he told her what he really wanted but it would have to wait until they returned to her home.

"I completely understand Janet and you have no idea how happy I am." Just as Eddie said that their food had arrived. "and how happy I am that our food is here I am starving." Eddie smiled and grabbed his burger. Janet just shook her head and began to eat her burger as well.

A few hours later, Janet and Eddie arrived back to her house and were sitting on the couch. Janet was laying on a pillow on Eddie's lap and Eddie was playing with her hair slightly. He thought now is the time to tell her exactly how he feels.

"Janet, I was hoping we could pick up our conversation from before." Eddie looked at her with so much emotion.

"Of course" Janet said wondering what he was going to say. Just then she decided to sit up and look at him.

Eddie adjusted his position slightly so he was turned towards her. He decided he just needed to say what he was thinking.

"Janet I know that you and I have been through so much this past year. I have had a lot of time to think about what happened in our relationship and where we both went wrong. I know that I have been very difficult to read at times mostly because I was never sure of what I wanted or what to do. The one thing I was sure of was you, it was always you. I was just never sure of me. I know it may be hard to believe but I had my own insecurities about this relationship but it wasn't really about what others would think of us like you thought….it was about what to do with the feelings that I had for you. Rory was not the first person I loved in my life. She was the girl who a teenage boy lusted after but that lust didn't hold up in the real world. After she left I thought that all I wanted was to be with a girl for a short amount of time and move on to the next…no connection – no complications but as I got older it just wasn't enough. Then I started to think about you. I started to think about our conversations at Sully's and how much I started to look forward to them. I started to wonder if what I was really looking for was someone who would except me for who I really was, good or bad, right or wrong, football hero or just plain landscaper, hot headed or cool – I needed for that person to see me – really see me and that is exactly what you did. You never put up with anything from me and always said it like it was. I had a hard time at first because it scared me a little to change the way I had lived my life and I just couldn't see how it would end up – I always knew how it would end up but it was always different with you. The thing that upset me the most when you told me about seeing my kiss Rory was that you didn't do anything. You just gave up…I was so angry because I knew that when you did that it was clear that I had everything to do with that. I couldn't believe that after all this time you would just give up on me, give up on us so easily but after some time I realized that it wasn't you that gave up it was me. Janet I know what I did that day was so incredibly wrong and I didn't see that right away. Unfortunately by the time I did see it, you had already slept with Rooster and everything seemed so out of control. But life is a series of choices – to forgive, to love, to live, to find the one that you can not live without. Janet I can't go back and change any of the events that lead to our relationship's end but I what I can tell you is that you are the first person I ever loved. You are the only person I have ever truly loved and you are the person that I can not live without. You are the person that at the end of the day, I know will be here for me in good times, in bad times, in my stupidity and any other time that you can think of. I want to be that person for you too Janet. I want to be the one that you can count on in any situation, the one that you can trust and the one that has your heart forever without any doubts of how I feel." Eddie had been talking for a bit so he stopped briefly to see how Janet was taking all of this.

Janet was listening intently to what Eddie was saying. She could not believe some of the things that he was saying. The part about Rooster was hard but yet he made some sense of it even for her. She knew that she could not take back the past nor could he and she knew that if their relationship was going to work they had to concentrate on moving forward and not dwelling on what they did wrong. She did have a few tears that occasionally would fall down her face but for the most part they were happy tears. She still wasn't quite sure where he was going…but soon she would know.

Eddie continued, "Janet what I want is for us to build a life together. I have had a year to think about how I want my life to be and when I thought that it would not include you I thought that filling my life with work and friends would be enough but I know that it is not. I made a promise that if I ever had the chance to get you back in my life I would not let you slip through my fingers again. (Eddie took her hands in his) Janet what I want is for you to be my wife. I want you to grow old with me and be the mother to my children. I want to be able to tell you that I love you everyday of my life so you never have to wonder what I am thinking or how I feel. Now I just want to know if you could possibly feel the same way about me?" Eddie had put everything out there and waited for her to respond.

Janet was so completely shocked by what Eddie just said. She was expecting him to suggest that they get back together but marriage…she didn't know what to do. She sat there and thought about everything that was said. It was clear to her that Eddie loved her and she felt that in the way that he looked at her as well as what he said, but was that enough. She thought back to what her grands had said about your first love. Her grandma told her that sometimes your first love is just that a first love – not meant to last but if it comes back to you then you should grab a hold of it and never let it go because if it comes back to you then it was meant to be your forever. Dwayne taught Janet what it was like to love so completely and whole heartedly that now she understood how to tell the difference between a fleeting love and a love meant to be. She looked at Eddie and could see the longer she was silent the worse he was feeling. He began to tear up because he thought that she didn't feel the same way.

Eddie sat there and realized that Janet didn't feel the same as him and that she was just trying to figure out how to tell him. His heart was breaking all over again. He began to pull his hands away from her. He just needed to get out of there as soon as possible as he knew he would break down soon.

Janet felt him pull away and she knew he was getting the wrong idea from her silence.

"Eddie" Janet said it so quietly

Eddie just couldn't handle her rejection, "You know Janet maybe this was too soon. I really need to…" Eddie was about to get up when Janet placed her hands on his face ever so gently.

"Eddie I love you too." It was all she had to say because the way that she was looking at him, he knew she felt the same.

Eddie started to smile and leaned forward to kiss her. The kiss was so passionate that there was no mistaking how much love was between these two people. This time Eddie was prepared to show her just exactly how much he loved her. He stopped suddenly and stood. He held out his hand and said, "Shall we?"

Janet smiled remembering the first time they had been together, when she was the one who had said those very words. She stood and took his hand. There was no more conversation that night just Janet and Eddie telling each other how they felt with their bodies. This memory would be the one that Janet would always remember as the day that she began to live her life, truly live her life the way she wanted with the man she had held in her heart for so long. This memory would be the one that Eddie would always return to as the day he did exactly what his heart told him to do and he began to live his life, truly live his life the way he should have all along. This was the memory of the day that Janet and Eddie began their lives living for each other and no matter what happened from this day forward they would face it together. This was the true beginning of the love story between Janet and Eddie.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20:

Eddie just laid there staring at the ceiling. He should be sleeping this he knew but he couldn't bring himself to close his eyes. Janet layed on his chest and was sound sleep. They had been awake most of the night making love to one another. It was as if they were trying to make up for the year that they were apart. All he knew was that this is the happiest he has been in a long time.

The one thing that did seem to creep into his head and was keeping him awake now was that she did not say anything about being his wife. She told him that she loved him and at the time he felt like that was more than enough. Now it was the question that was left hanging in the air. He didn't know if he was rushing her into something she wasn't ready for but he did know that he wanted his life to start and he did not feel the need to "date" her any longer. He knew exactly what he wanted and this time he wasn't going to step around it – he would face it head on.

Janet began to stir a bit and realized where she was and she had to smile a bit. She knew that they would need to have another heart to heart talk especially now because he had mentioned that he wanted to her to be his wife and she wasn't sure if that was him asking or just telling her what he wanted but either way she would have to talk to him about the money that Dwayne left her. She didn't want there to be any secrets between them and she was hoping that the money would not change Eddie's mind. She knew that Eddie was a proud man and may not be accepting of that amount of money especially knowing where it came from. But she had to know how he felt about it before she would even think about becoming his wife.

Eddie felt her move just slightly and lifted her face towards his. Janet just smiled at him and they kissed ever so gently. Janet said so quietly, "Why are you still awake? You have got to be tired." She smiled during the last comment.

Eddie looked at her and tried to decide what he would say. It seemed wrong to avoid anything after the night they just shared so he said earnestly, "I was thinking about you and the fact that you didn't really answer my question."

Janet looked at him more seriously now, "I didn't know if you were asking me just then or just telling me what you would like for the future, I'm sorry." She said truthfully.

"Janet I want you to be my wife. I don't need to think about it and I don't need to spend any more time trying to figure anything out. You are the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with so I am asking you Janet Meadows, will you marry me?" Eddie looked at her so sweetly.

Janet thought for a second before answering. She knew that they had to talk about the money so she decided to talk about it now. "Before I answer your question Eddie there is something that I need to talk to you about and it may change your mind about our future so can we talk about that first?" Janet looked like she was about to be sick in that moment.

Eddie looked at her like she had just lost her mind. "What could we possibly have to talk about that would change my mind…What is going on here?" he thought.

"Ok Janet lets talk then." Eddie was a bit on edge and didn't want it to sound that way but it did.

Janet knew he was now upset and it would definitely work against her but she had to be honest.

"Eddie it has to do with Dwayne." Janet said looking him in the eyes.

Eddie closed his eyes and felt as though someone had just punched him right in the stomach. "Why is she bringing him up right now? What could he possibly have to do with us getting married? When am I going to stop hearing about this guy?" He thought

Janet spoke quickly, "Eddie it isn't what you are thinking I am sure but if you and I are going to have a future than you need to know something about my past with Dwayne. Do you think that you can listen to me with an open mind or are you just going to get upset and overreact in which case maybe now is not the right time to talk about it but I won't answer your question until we do." Janet decided she needed to be firm. She fully expected the Eddie that she knew to return.

Eddie said, "Ok Janet I will listen to what you have to say but quite frankly you are scaring the shit out of me right now and I don't really know what to think. How could anything having to do with Dwayne affect our future?" Eddie was just confused and starting to become hurt again over Janet's ability to have moved on from him when he clearly couldn't move on from her.

"When Dwayne died, he had no family left. His mother died of the same illness that he had and his father died a few years later. He never had a family of his own because of his illness. He didn't want to pass it on to a child of his as that is the fate he had from his mother. What I am about to tell you may upset you but you need to understand the position he was in. I am not trying to hurt your feelings but I feel as though it may. I can't be your wife unless you are ok with what I am about to tell you." Janet kept looking at Eddie to gauge his reaction.

Eddie was sitting there looking at Janet screaming in his head "what could possibly be the reason you can't marry me – what did the two of you do while you were together?" His thoughts were going crazy at this time.

"Eddie, Dwayne left everything he had to me. He gave me his mother's ring that contains his birthstone because she gave it to him and wanted him to give it to someone he loved." Janet paused just a bit.

Eddie thought "Ok that is really nice but that would not make me upset…it is a ring…it's not an engagement ring…what is she getting at?"

Eddie said to Janet, "I don't care that you got a ring from Dwayne…why would I be upset about that?"

"Eddie it isn't all he gave to me." Janet paused trying to find the words. She knew there was no way to say this so she decided to tell him the truth outright. "He left me his savings and life insurance policy that his parents had established for him when he was a baby and it is a lot of money Eddie, it is $150,000 in fact."

"There I said it" she thought. Now how would he react…

Eddie just sat there a second and suddenly got out of bed. Janet thought, "There it is, the Eddie I remember." She felt so sad. She knew in that moment that her relationship would never work with Eddie if she kept that money. She would never be able to honor Dwayne's wishes and make Eddie happy in the present. She was so hopeful that all the changes that she had since in Eddie would have been real but maybe they weren't. This is way she couldn't accept his proposal because she knew he would want to take it back after finding out the truth.

Eddie got up and walked out to the living room. He had grabbed his boxers in the meantime and put them on. He paced back and forth in the living room trying to make sense of what she just said. "How am I supposed to compete with a ghost? That is a lot of money to leave a person you barely know" he thought. So many things were going through his head he couldn't keep up. He knew that at some point he would need to come to terms with this but right now he just couldn't. He walked back into the bedroom and just stared at Janet sitting up in bed waiting for him to speak. She looked like she was about to cry but he just couldn't help it. He grabbed his clothes and turned to leave. His heart broke for what he was about to do to her but he thought it would be better than saying anything right now.

When Janet heard the door close behind Eddie she broke out into tears. She knew that this was too much for him to handle. Janet saw so much potential in that check. She saw all the things that she always wanted in her life and for her future. She thought about the possibility of getting a house that her and Eddie picked out together and would create together as husband and wife. She saw children running around the yard and her working in the garden. She saw security in knowing that they would be taken care of for many years so Eddie's business could continue to grow. She saw only possibilities and Eddie only saw it attached to another man. He couldn't see that this man lost his life and all he had was this to give to the woman he loved. He couldn't see that this man had to face the fact that someone else would get to live their life with Janet and not him. He just couldn't see beyond himself and that has really always been the problem between them. Eddie is happy when things are going his way but when things shift just a bit he can't deal with it. If he wanted to share his life with her how could he just leave like that?

Janet just laid back down onto her pillow as quiet slow tears ran down her face. She never even heard the door open and close.

Eddie got to his truck and thought to himself "what are you doing? You are going to let money from a dead guy ruin your life? You are going to let money stand in the way of being with the one person who you just you loved more than anything? You are a moron." He got out of his truck and walked back into the house and headed for her bedroom.

Eddie got to the door frame of her room and saw her resting with her head on the pillow, eyes closed and tearing running down her face. He hurt her that much he knew. "How am I going to make this right?" he thought.

Eddie walked over to her, sat down on the edge of the bed. With this shift, Janet opened her eyes to find Eddie's staring back at hers. In that instant, Eddie leaned down and scooped Janet up in his arms. Janet was stunned. She had not heard him return and certainly didn't think he would. She wrapped her arms around him and they swayed a bit with each other for what seemed like hours but really was only about 5 minutes.

Eddie was the first to lean back. He looked into her eyes and spoke, "Janet I'm sorry for the way I reacted. I just wasn't expecting that. I should never have left before we talked about what you just said." Eddie said looking genuinely like he was sorry.

Janet just stared at him. As she sat there she couldn't help but think how much he had changed. In the past he would have taken off and she wouldn't have seen him for days. She spoke, "Eddie I understand why you are not happy with this but I had no control over what he did and I certainly didn't know it would be a large sum of money like that but one thing you need to remember is that his life was cut way too short and he had no one else. Eddie imagine what you would feel like if you wanted to have a life with someone and because of something completely beyond your control you would not only not have that life but you knew that they would go on to have a life with someone else…imagine how you would feel."

Eddie didn't have to imagine that because he knew exactly what that felt like. "Janet I don't have to imagine that. When you left and began a relationship with Dwayne that was exactly how I felt."

Janet realized in that moment what had said and how it paralleled the situation they were in. "I'm sorry Eddie for moving on with my life and for doing that with Dwayne. I thought my life here was over and I wasn't looking for that relationship with Dwayne it just sort of happened. I never thought you were here wanting to be with me – I actually thought you had moved on with someone else." She said trying to be sincere yet truthful.

"Why did you think that I had moved on? Hannah would have told you the truth…didn't you even ask?" Suddenly feeling hurt all over again

"No Eddie I didn't ever ask Hannah about you. It would have hurt too much to know that you got back together with Rory or someone else and I just couldn't handle it. It took me a long time just be ok on a daily basis after I got to Hope. I hadn't even met Dwayne until I had been in Hope for several months and even then we were just friends – he was teaching me kick boxing. I hadn't started dating Dwayne until just before Hannah's wedding. I never even dreamed that you would stay single. I just couldn't get what you said to me out of my head. I never thought there would ever be a chance for us to be sitting where we are now." Janet said hoping he would understand.

Eddie sat and thought about what she had just said. "Why would she think I would ever get back together with Rory? Why did I say those things to her? Of course she thought I would have moved on – I practiced told her I would never care about her again telling her to go rot…NICE Latekka" he thought.

Eddie reached out his hand and touched her cheek. "Janet I am sorry for what I said to you. I never should have treated you the way that I did when Rory came back. You never had to worry about Rory then or after you left. She came around shortly after you had moved away and we exchanged words. I doubt you or I will ever see the likes of her again. You think I was meant to you…well I was twice as bad towards her but in her case I meant every word."

Janet sat there a bit shocked. "He told Rory off? How is that possible?" she thought

Eddie continued, "I shouldn't be upset with you because some other man saw all the great qualities in you as I should have. I can't blame the man for falling in love with you – I should only be blaming myself for letting you go in the first place. Why didn't you mention the money when we were in Hope?" he was curious.

"I only opened the envelope yesterday. I would never have kept that from you this long, I just wasn't ready to open it until yesterday and I felt as though I needed to put closure to all things Dwayne before you and I could move forward. Does that make sense?" Janet said hoping that he would understand.

"So what do you plan to do with it?" Eddie didn't like it one bit but he need to ask

"I have thought about it a lot actually. You and I have a lot of history together, some of it good and some of it really bad. What if we were to create a new history? What if we were to walk away from the memories of before yesterday and start our lives with a clean slate? No more front porch where you kissed Rory or bedroom where I slept with Rooster but a place that you and I create all the memories together, as husband and wife, bring our children home to the place we created out of what we feel for each other. What if we could create the home that we would grow old in and welcome our grand kids in? What would you say to that?" She thought maybe now was a good time to address his question.

"I would say when do we start?" he said smiling.

"I know that this is difficult Eddie for you to understand but Dwayne gave me that money because he wanted me to have all the possibilities that he would never have. He knew that I would be sharing those possibilities with someone else but he made me promise that I would live my life and be happy. I am choosing to share my life with you Eddie. This money could give us that possibility to create our own memories – happy memories not of mistakes we made but of love we created. Eddie, please understand that I know this is hard for you but think about our future. Is it worth losing each other again over someone's wish for me to be happy?" Janet was going to pull out all the stops.

Eddie couldn't resist her logic. She was right about one thing. He would not lose her over money plain and simple, regardless of where it came from. Maybe this money could give them the new start that they both wanted but he knew deep down that he would be the one who got to hold Janet in his arms everyday. He knew that he would be the one that got to come home at night to her and in the evenings make love to her. He knew he would be the one that would give her children that they would both raise and enjoy through out their lives. He knew he would be the one who grew old with Janet. He knew that Dwayne would have given anything to have that life with her because that is what it was like to be with Janet. So now, he had a choice but really in the end there was no choice. He would chose Janet and carry on the dreams of the one man who lost everything to the man who spent a year dreaming of another chance to have his possibility again.

"No Janet it is not. So I ask you again, Janet Meadows, will you marry me? Will you spend the rest of your life with me and all the possibilities that we can create together?" Eddie was hoping that this would be the last time he would have to ask.

"Yes, Eddie, yes I will because you have always been my possibility but now I want my forever to be with you." Janet said and leaned forward to kiss Eddie.

With that the newly engaged couple fell back into the bed and began the afternoon the same way they had the evening before, showing each other just how much they loved one another and their possibilities for the future.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21:

It was early evening and Janet and Eddie had spent the better part of the day in bed. They couldn't ignore the growls of their stomachs any longer so they decided it was time to get up and get something to eat.

Eddie said as he was pulling on his jeans and flannel shirt, "Hey what do you think about me going to get some subs at Murph's? I know you don't feel like cooking nor do I see any food in your fridge."

Janet just smiled knowing that what he really meant was beer and knew he was right. "Sure that sounds great… my usual?"

"Of course, I'll be back" He kissed her quickly and headed out the door.

Janet layed in bed for a few minutes just thinking over the last 24 hours. She couldn't believe that she was actually engaged to Eddie and that he was finally ok with the money that Dwayne had left her. She was more surprised by how he handled it. She felt so confident about her future because she felt so secure in Eddie's feelings for her for the first time in their entire relationship. She felt so lucky to have Eddie back in her life and also to have known and loved Dwayne as he was a big part of how she felt about herself now. She looked up and smiled. Her life was finally coming together.

She decided she should probably get up and get dressed. She put on a t shirt and a pair of shorts. She didn't feel the need to get fully dressed as they would only be hanging around the house tonight and then be going back to bed. It got her to thinking about how that was going to work now that they were engaged. Would he just live here until they could find their own house or just keep going back forth between the two? She figured they had time to talk about that along with when he was thinking about actually getting married. She would have to plan a wedding but she wasn't really all about the huge production that would have been Hannah's wedding. She sat down on the couch and thought "I don't have to figure any of this out tonight, I don't even have a ring yet so I suppose I don't really have to tell anyone for a while…but I should probably tell Hannah and Sully and of course my Grands." It seemed Janet's mind was on overdrive.

Janet got up and walked to the kitchen to get plates and stuff ready for their dinner because she knew that Eddie would be starving when he returned. When she got everything all ready she went back to the couch, sat down and turned on the TV. She was aimlessly flipping through the channels when her cell phone rang.

"Hello?" Janet said just opening it and now actually looking at who it was.

"Hey Janet, whatcha doing?" Hannah said rather cheerfully

"Hey, just flipping through the channels waiting for Eddie to bring back dinner I am starving." Janet said realizing it was true.

"So I haven't heard from you in a few days am I too assume that things are going pretty good with Eddie. Did you decide to tell him about the money or not?" Hannah was curious to see what was going on between them.

"Actually I did tell him and he was upset at first just as I thought he would be but Hannah it was amazing. He left but got no farther than the driveway and came back and talked to me about it. I know deep down that he is not happy about it but he does understand where Dwayne was coming from and he is smart enough to know that Dwayne isn't a threat to him in any way so he agreed to use the money for starting our life together, you know after we get married." Janet said that last part a little softer just adding to the surprise that she was sure Hannah would get from learning that last part.

Hannah sat there for a second before she said, "Did I just hear you right? You are getting married…to Eddie…OH MY GOD!" Hannah then started to scream.

"Yeah and you are first person I have told. I will tell you all about it I promise but I think Eddie just pulled up in the driveway so I'll talk to ya later, K?" Janet said quickly and then shut her phone. She got uneasy suddenly about saying anything but she wasn't really sure why.

Hannah just smiled and said, "yes we will! Love ya." With that Hannah hung up as well.

Eddie bounded up the stairs with subs from Murphs and a couple of grocery bags including chips, Janet's favorite cheesy puffs, popcorn and of course his favorite beer along with some other necessities for their existence.

Just as Janet suspected Eddie was starving so they sat down to eat immediately on the couch and Eddie seemed to be sitting as close to Janet as possible. She kept thinking to herself that this is just not happening. He just seems so different then he was before. She just couldn't help but smile at the thought.

"So what's with all the smiles there beautiful?" Eddie said with a smile of his own

"Just happy…You're pretty terrific…you know that right?" Janet said was a sassy grin

"Yeah I am…aren't I." Eddie joked playing along. He was so happy at this very minute he couldn't contain it. He had given up on this dream of being with Janet again so long ago that he felt like pinching himself to make sure it was real but there was one thing that he still had to do and was going to wait until after they ate to do it.

Janet laughed and snuggled into Eddie just a bit while they finished their subs.

As they sat there shortly after they finished eating just watching some TV and snuggling, Eddie suddenly said, "So when were you thinking you would want to get married?"

Janet looked at him like he was sick or something, "I hadn't really thought about it since you asked me like 5 hours ago."

"Well actually it was yesterday but the last time I asked you it was 5 hours ago and don't you girls have this stuff figured out when you're like 5?" Eddie laughed.

"Not all of us but after helping Hannah with her "almost wedding" I don't think I want to do all of that." Janet slowly drifted off into her thoughts.

Eddie moved Janet slightly on the couch so she was sitting with her back against his chest and his arms were around her waist. "Why didn't you like the idea of a big wedding?"

Janet thought for a minute and said, "No I just think for me I would like something a bit smaller scale. It was a big headache and looked where it got her."

Just then Eddie put his hands on top of Janet's and appeared to be wanting to hold them but instead Janet felt something slide onto her left hand ring finger. Janet looked down to find a gorgeous diamond antique engagement ring on her finger.

When Eddie had gone to visit with Janet's grands he told Edith of his plan to marry her if she would have him. He knew then that Janet was the one for him and if ever given the chance he would make her his wife. Edith of course was over the moon and knew that it may take some time but she felt in her heart that Eddie was Janet's true love and they would find their way back to one another. She told Eddie about this tiny jewelry store that she and Janet had gone to when Edith's wedding ring needed some repair. They had gorgeous antique looking sets that Janet seemed to be drawn too. There were two ring set that Janet actually pointed out to her grandma that must have caught her eye. Those are the ones that Edith described to Eddie. He stopped in at the jewelry store before heading to Hope in part to look around and see what they had but also to see if he could find the ones that Edith had described. He didn't really have a plan to buy one but when he saw one of the rings he was sure Edith described he knew that was the ring so he bought it instantly. He wasn't sure when he would need it but it felt good to have it none the less. When he went out to Murph's he made a quick trip to his house to grab it since he didn't have it when he proposed. By the look on Janet's face he knew she loved it.

Janet looked at the ring and was stunned. How could he possibly have known about this ring. She had seen it once when she was with her Grands and she absolutely fell in love with it. It was a white gold setting with diamonds in the band going down either side and it had one large diamond in the center surrounded by a circle of diamonds and just outside that outer circle were two more smaller diamonds one on each side of the larger stone just above the where the band began. It was so beautiful and unique. "There was no way that he could have known about this ring…unless" she thought

"Eddie this is the most beautiful ring…where did you get this?" Janet was peering into his eyes as if she knew exactly what had happened.

Eddie thought it was best to tell the truth. "Your grands told me about the rings you liked at that little jewelry store in Providence so when I left the nursing home before coming to Hope I stopped in there. I wasn't planning on buying anything but then I saw this ring sitting there and it looked just like the ring that Edith described so I knew it had to be yours." Eddie was looking at Janet to see what she was thinking.

Janet sat there for a second trying to absorb all of what he was saying. He bought her an engagement ring before he came to see her in Hope. He went to visit her Grands before he came to Hope. They hadn't talked in over a year yet he was so sure that she was the one that he went to talk with her Grands and bought a ring….ahhhh (as if a light bulb had gone off in her head) that was what that phone call was all about when Grands called about – she already knew Eddie was there. "Those two are so sneaky" she thought.

Janet looked at the ring again and turned to face Eddie. She took his face in her hands and kissed him deeply. In that moment she knew she would never doubt how Eddie felt about her ever again.

After they spent several minutes kissing, Eddie leaned back and looked at Janet, "I am glad you like it. I told you Janet that if I ever had the chance to have you back in my life that that was what I wanted. You have no idea how lonely I was when you were gone. I used to come here and just sit for hours because I felt as though you were still a part of me when I was here. I had resigned myself to a live without love because no matter what I did or who I spent time with they weren't you. I poured myself into my work and filled my evenings with working late or hanging with the guys. But I gotta tell ya this is sooo much better." Eddie pulled Janet back into the position they had been in with her back against his chest.

Janet felt badly hearing about how he was living his life. She would never have left knowing that there was a chance for them to work it out. She always thought that what she had done would be unforgiveable to Eddie. She never thought for a second that he would ever want to be with her again. But she couldn't help but think that her time in Hope was good for her too because she was able to love herself again just as her grandma said and she needed to do that before she had any future with Eddie, she had to forgive herself.

Janet didn't move but she spoke softly, "You will never have to spend another day sitting on this couch alone in an empty house because I am here Eddie and I will never leave you again. That I promise you."

Eddie squeezed her so tightly after hearing that. She never turned but if she had she would have seen the one tear that fell down Eddie's face. She would never know exactly how much that statement meant to Eddie in that moment.

That is how they spent the rest of the evening, snuggling on the couch, eating popcorn or cheese puffs that Janet reluctantly shared with Eddie. It was a simple evening but one that both would remember always as the day they agreed to spend their lives together, no matter what life had to offer they would have each other.

The next day Eddie woke up first and was thankful that it was Sunday and he could sleep in since they both hadn't really gotten a lot of sleep over the last 4 days. It was late in the morning and Janet was still snuggled into him but he could tell she wasn't sleeping soundly since she had this enormous smile on her face.

"Hey there sleepy head, what do you want to today?" Eddie said wrapping his arms around his fiancée'.

"I was hoping that we could talk about where we are going to live? What are you thinking about that because I remember you distinctly saying that you wanted to sleep with me every night which would imply a certain living arrangement, wouldn't you agree?" Janet rolled over and smiled at Eddie.

Eddie smiled and kissed her, "You thought right. I was thinking about this and since you and I decided that we would like to find a new place for us to "create our own memories" I believe is how you put it that I could move in here until that time and then we'll move there and sell or rent out this place. Phil and Emily are living together now anyway so I am sure they aren't going to mind one less roommate. What do you think." Eddie felt pretty proud of himself.

Janet shook her head and laughed, "Well you have just thought of everything haven't you. In that case let's get a movin' – I've always wanted a roommate!" Janet said with a quick eyebrow raise. She tried to move but Eddie just grabbed her and kissed her. Clearly he had another plan. "We'll get to that in about an hour or so." And that was the last thing Eddie said.

They arrived at 32 Gelson a few hours later with boxes ready to tackle Eddie's room. Phil and Emily were on the couch watching TV. They knew that Eddie had reconciled with Janet, at least on friendly terms but had no idea about what they were about to witness when Janet and Eddie walked through the front door.

Eddie and Janet came in through the front door giggling and touching each other. Phil and Emily turned around and just stared at the pair. Eddie was the first one to speak.

"Phil buddy how is it going?" Eddie said almost giddy.

Phil hadn't seen Eddie smile in like a year let alone be giddy so he knew something had changed.

"Hey Eddie, hey Janet welcome home." Phil and Emily both got up and went to give Janet a hug.

"Hey guys, it is good to be home." Janet hugged them both.

"So what are you two up to today?" Phil asked.

"Well it looks like I'll be out of your hair after today." Eddie said happily and put his arm around Janet

"Are you moving into Janet's house? That's great Eddie." Phil was truly happy for his friend.

"No I am moving into my fiancées house." Eddie looked at Janet and gave her a kiss

"What? You are engaged? Oh My God!" Emily was screeching

"Yes we are getting married there pippy long stockings" Eddie said chuckling

"Let me see that rock" Phil suddenly saw the ring

Janet held out her left hand and showed Phil and Emily. Eddie was just standing there smiling.

"That is just great. I am happy for you both." Phil said genuinely happy

"Thanks Buddy but we got lots of packing to do today so we'll be upstairs if you need us." Eddie said and grabbed Janet's hand and they headed up the steps.

They reached Eddie's bedroom and Janet stopped just short of the door. Eddie felt her hesitate and he said, "What are ya doing?"

"I don't know…it has been so long since I've been here." Janet wasn't quite sure why she felt so apprehensive.

"Hey, listen no matter what's happened between us Janet, it's in the past. Our future starts today remember now lets get movin' – I got a hot new roommate waiting for me." Eddie winked at Janet and walked into his room

Janet just stood there and watched as Eddie began to fill the boxes with his clothes, the dirty ones on the floor and the others just thrown everywhere else…this was Eddie's room after all…but only for a few more hours. "Yes" Janet thought "this is really happening." With that Janet stepped forward and joined her fiancée in his room and they worked for the rest of the afternoon packing up his old life so they could begin their new life.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22:

Eddie and Janet spent the whole day packing up Eddie's room and random stuff around the house that he wanted to bring with him. They actually had a pretty fun time packing in between all the kissing and silliness that they were engaging in.

It was hours later and they had just finished putting the last box in Janet's house. They shut the front door and locked it. They both made a beeline for the couch and sunk into it as if someone pushed each of them directly into the couch. They looked at each other and smiled.

Janet said, "Well we got it all in here…I can't believe we were able to get it all over here between your truck and my jeep, but it's here."

Eddie smiled at that thought of all of his things being here, in Janet's home, well actually in their home now. The times that he spent here on his own just months earlier seemed like a lifetime away. Eddie felt so relaxed at that moment even though he was completely worn out.

Janet looked over at Eddie who looked at that moment as if he would sleep right there at any point. Janet said, "Hey babe why don't we call it a day and take care of this stuff tomorrow, ok?" Janet leaned over and touched Eddie's cheek with her hand.

Eddie just looked over at Janet and said, "sounds good." Eddie got up and took Janet's hand and for the first time ever they went to bed in their bed, in their home.

The next morning Eddie was slow to get up to go to work. He decided since their Sunday was so busy that he could go into work a little late. He texted Nick and said he would be in later and went back to sleep.

Around 11am Janet began to stir and realized that Eddie was still sleeping. She completely freaked out thinking that they had overslept. She started to get up in a hurry when Eddie grabbed her around the waist and pulled her back into the bed. Just then he opened his eyes and said, "It's ok, I told Nick I would be coming in later today, owner remember?" Janet physically relaxed.

Eddie and Janet rolled over to face each other and were so darned happy. Each of them hadn't realized just how nice it was to have the other there when they woke up. Eddie was the first one to speak.

"So what are your plans? Are you going to go back to work at Sully's or just hang around here for a while and try and find us a home?"

Janet looked at him and said after thinking for a second, "Sully said I could come back whenever I wanted and I told him once I got settled I would most definitely do that but I think now I have quite the project on my hands" as she pointed to the dining room full of boxes that were packed with Eddie's belongings.

"Ya know that you don't have to do all that alone. I could help you when I get home from work but if you want to work on it be my guest!" Eddie said with a grin.

"I think that you and I will be putting some of that stuff away together but some of it I can do myself…like actually wash your clothes before putting them away – I don't think you even know if any of that stuff you threw into the boxes was actually clean or not." Janet was partly laughing now.

"Hey, it's organized just maybe a little differently than you organize stuff." Eddie knew that when Janet was gone he didn't care much about anything and his room was the farthest from his mind.

"Ok whatever you say Eddie but I am still going to wash it and organize it my way then – which means no more clothes on the floor, on the chair…" Janet was listing places off her fingers when Eddie grabbed her hands and started to kiss and tickle her.

"I get it, I get it…you organize it anyway you want. But I really should get into work sometime today." Eddie kissed her one last time and headed for the shower.

Janet got up and put some sweats on. The two actually slept all night for once but she only had a t shirt on when she went to bed. They were both so tired that neither of them had the energy to shower that night.

She went into the kitchen and made some coffee and started to make some breakfast or actually lunch for Eddie since it was so late. She sat at the kitchen table and looked at all the boxes and thought "Well I guess I better get started at some point."

Eddie got ready, ate the lunch that Janet had made him and headed out the door but not before he kissed his fiancée and said, "You have a fun day unloading those boxes, I love you." He patted her behind a little and left for the day.

Janet got through all the boxes that had clothes in them and started washing his clothes. He was able to put them away in small amounts as they came out of the dryer and got her closest organized in the process to make room for his shirts. She was surprised at how easily Eddie's life fit into her own. She knew that they would be in this house for a while but she couldn't help but day dream a little about a home of their own some day. She thought about growing a garden and putting Dwayne's ashes in it just as she promised. She couldn't help but smile knowing that Dwayne would be happy for her happiness. She came to know that Dwayne knew this would be her life all along. Just then she looked down at her engagement ring and started to day dream a little about getting married. She thought that maybe they should talk about a date. She then realized that she hadn't called her Grands yet to tell them the good news.

"Hello?" Edith said

"Hey Gran, how are you guys doing today?" Janet said just as cheerful as can be.

"Well Janet it is so good to hear from you. Is everything ok?" Edith was concerned that she would be calling her so soon after returning to home.

Janet chuckled a bit, "Everything is great Gran, that is why I am calling actually. I wanted to tell you something. Eddie asked me to marry him and I said Yes!" Janet said so excited.

Edith just smiled into the phone. She turned around and told Janet's grandpa the good news.

"Oh Janet that is just so wonderful. We couldn't be happier for you both." Tears actually fell from Edith's eyes.

"Thanks Gran. We haven't set a date yet but I don't think it will be too far off. Eddie moved in with me yesterday but I think that we are going to find a home together, you know one that we pick out together." Janet loved the sound of everything that she was saying.

"Well that is just great Janet. You know that your grandpa and I only want what's best for you. You sound so happy. That makes us just so happy too." Edith could hear the happiness in her voice.

"Do you think that Grandpa could walk me down the isle?" Janet wanted them to be there more than anything as they were her only family.

"You didn't even need to ask, of course. You just let us know when and where and we will be there."

"Ok Grans, well I better get going I have to work on unpacking Eddie's things but as soon as we pick a date I will give you a call. I love you both oh and thanks for telling Eddie about that jewelry store he picked the most beautiful ring. You are a sneaky one you know that." Janet said chuckling and shaking her head.

Edith smiled and thought,"that's my boy" and then said, "I can't wait to see it and I don't know what you mean, (she laughed) We love you Janet, talk to you soon." With that Edith hung up the phone.

"Bye Gran." Janet smiled and hung up the phone.

Janet turned around to looked at the rest of the boxes and thought, "Well your not going to unpack yourselves."

Many hours later, Janet had gotten through almost all the boxes. She put his things in places throughout the house. The things that she didn't really know what to do with she kept on the dining room table. She was sitting on the couch watching some TV as it was later on in the evening just waiting for Eddie to come home.

Her mind started to wander to her wedding day and when she wanted that to be. It was the start of spring and the flowers were just starting to bloom. She thought about where she would want to be married. She didn't really know if she wanted to be married in a church. The one thing that they shared was a love of the outdoors. She thought back to the day when they were both in Hope and working in the yard. Eddie was moving the lawn and she was working in the garden. That beautiful garden…she was imagining how amazing it was looking right now. That is when the idea came to her. How would Eddie feel about getting married in a garden. There was a beautiful garden just outside of the Ridge. It had walkways and rows of beautiful flowers. They would be absolutely beautiful in July or August. She thought, "Would that be too soon?" As Janet was lost in her thoughts Eddie arrived home. He walked in the door and saw Janet staring at the TV but she clearly wasn't watching it. He wonders what she was so lost in thought about.

"Hey sweetie, whatcha thinking about." Eddie asked as he went to sit next to Janet.

She didn't respond right away. Suddenly she looked at him as if she hadn't heard a word he said. "Hey when did you get home." Janet looked as though she just woke up.

"I have been here just for a few minutes…what were you thinking about so intently?" Eddie leaned over and kissed her.

"I was actually thinking about our wedding. I was thinking about the date. Have you thought about when you want to get married?" Janet was hoping that he would say soon.

"I do like the sound of that but no I hadn't thought about we would actually do it. Whenever you want to get married I will be there." Eddie smiled. He layed his head down in her lap and looked up at her.

She just smiled and started to run her fingers through his hair. She said, "I called my Grands and told them that we were getting married and asked my grandpa if he would walk me down the isle. It got me thinking about when and where. How would you feel about getting married at that garden place just outside the Ridge…I think it's called the Paine gardens." She looked at him hopefully.

"Yeah I know the place…great landscaping there. Sounds good to me so you are thinking the summer than huh?" Eddie smiled at the prospect. He was prepared to wait until she was ready but if it were up to him they would go to the court house.

"Actually I was thinking about July or August. The flowers would be in bloom then and it would be so beautiful there. I was thinking about the day when we were outside in the yard in Hope and I guess I thought getting married outside would kind of be a great start to our life together. I know that probably sounds silly." Janet looked away

Eddie sat up and looked in Janet's eyes. He said, "It doesn't sound silly at all. I can't wait to be married to you so if that is what you want then it sounds perfect to me. So let's look at the calendar and pick a date."

With that Janet and Eddie looked at the calendar and decided on a few dates. Janet would call in the morning to see what dates would be available. They ate their dinner and got ready for bed. As they laid there in the dark facing each other before drifting off to sleep, Eddie said, "if I haven't said this already thanks for getting all my stuff put away and making me feel like I am home…I love you so much and I can't wait to stop calling you Meadows…Latekka sounds so much better." Eddie kissed her gently and closed his eyes.

Janet had a tear run down her cheek. She said, "I love you too Latekka." With that they both began to drift off to sleep.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23:

After a few calls, Janet was able to set the date for their wedding. It would be the first Saturday in August. She thought that would be perfect. She called Eddie right away.

"Hey beautiful. What goes on?" Eddie said so happy to see her name on his phone

"Hey I don't mean to bother you but I thought I would let you know that I booked the Paine Gardens for the first Saturday in August for our wedding. How does that sound?" Janet couldn't help but smile she was so happy.

Eddie smiled and said, "That sounds great. So who are you thinking about asking to be in the wedding." Eddie needed to know just so he knew who to ask.

"Well Hannah of course will be my maid of honor and then I was thinking Allison and Emily probably why?" Janet was wondering why he was asking now.

"Ok that sounds good. I just wanted to know who of the guys to ask. No biggie I am sure we have plenty of time for all that stuff." Eddie was clueless as to how much really needed to be done with just a few months to the wedding.

"Actually Eddie our wedding is only a few months away, we have a lot to do but I won't bug you at work about it I promise." Janet actually just wanted him to know the date so he could schedule work around it.

"You're not bugging me but I will talk about it more with ya tonight. Love you." Eddie said with a smile.

"Ok babe, talk to ya tonight, love you too." Janet hung up the phone

Janet was sitting on the couch later on in the early afternoon began to think about Sully's. She thought that it was probably time to go talk with Sully about heading back to work. She had been home for weeks now and really didn't have much else to really organize at home. She was getting somewhat tired with not really having a purpose everyday. If she was being truthful she really did miss getting out and interacting with others. She really was holding off because she knew that when she went back to work she would have to deal with Rooster. He was still there and she hadn't spoken to him in well over a year and things weren't great when she left. She knew that the time had come to deal with it but she just wasn't looking forward to it. She also didn't know how Eddie was going to feel about it. She thought, "Well there is no time like the present. I guess I need to go and have a talk with Sully and see when I can come back to work. Rooster I'll have to deal with later on."

Janet walked into Sully's and the crowd was just starting to pick up. It wasn't quite 3pm and Sully was behind the bar talking to the regulars. Sully saw her walk in immediately walking from behind the bar up to her to give her a hug.

"Janet I sure hope you walking through my door means what I think it does." Sully was actually smiling.

Janet smiled and said, "Yep it is. I am just wondering when you want to start working again. I kinda missed the place."

"How bout tonight?" Sully was kidding but in some ways not really.

"Ahh, maybe not tonight but when are ya thinking?" Janet asked chuckling a bit.

"How about Saturday or is that too early?" Sully was so hoping that she would say yes.

"Ok Sully Saturday it is. Maybe Monday we can sit down and figure out a schedule. The only days I need off are the first weekend and probably week of August." Janet wanted that worked out right away.

"Sure thing but why do you need that time off?" Sully wondered

"Eddie and I are getting married that Saturday so I figured I would need Friday off for the rehearsal dinner and the week off for our honeymoon." Janet just smiled saying this outloud for the first time.

Sully hugged Janet again. He didn't even know that they were engaged but he was so happy about it. He finally spoke, "That is just great Janet. I am happy for you both."

"Thanks Sully. So when do you want me to come in on Saturday?" Janet said

The two got the details all worked out and got her schedule together for at least that week until they could sit down and talk on Monday about how it would work on a regular basis.

Just as Janet was leaving Rooster was coming in. The two just glanced at each other but Janet turned away and headed out the door. Rooster had heard that she was back in town but not much more than that. He wondered if her being at Sully's meant that she was coming back to work. He had never had a chance to talk to her after everything that had happened between them and he had a lot he wanted to say. After talking or rather listening to what Eddie had to say Rooster started to really think about what he had said. He realized after that night that Eddie was right. He didn't act like Janet's friend that night and should never have put himself or her in that position. He realized that night that he had ruined his friendship with Janet and didn't really deserve to get it back but he didn't think she would ever come back either.

"Hey Sully is Janet coming back to work?" Rooster asked Sully needing to know

"Yeah she is. She starts on Saturday and I want you to keep your distance from her. I don't really understand all of what happened with all of you but she is happy and getting married and I don't want you to upset her like that ever again." Sully was serious.

Rooster just stared at Sully. He couldn't even formulate what to say. He thought, "Did he just say that she is getting married? To who?"

"Ok Sully I'll keep my distance but I am going to have to talk to her at some time. By the way, who is she marrying anyway?" He really had no clue.

"Eddie you idiot…who else would it be?" Sully thought he was an idiot for not figuring that out.

Rooster stood there and felt as though someone had punched him in the stomach. He didn't think that Eddie would ever get her back. He wasn't sure why he thought that but he just felt that their time was over. Maybe he had misjudged Eddie. Maybe he had misjudged everything.

"Oh" is all that Rooster said for the rest of the night.

Janet was back at home, making dinner when Eddie came home from work. Eddie came right into the kitchen and grabbed Janet around the waist. He turned her around and kissed her deeply.

Eddie and Janet stopped kissing when their breathe had run out.

"Welcome home…what was that for?" Janet smiled wondering why Eddie was so affectionate.

"I just missed you today that's all." Eddie smiled and Janet suddenly didn't care why any more.

Janet smiled and said, "Dinner almost ready why don't you go clean up and I'll get the table ready, K?"

"Ok" With that Eddie turned and headed for their bedroom

Minutes later they were sitting at the table eating dinner when Janet decided to talk about going back to work.

"So I went and saw Sully today?" Janet looked at him

"Oh yeah why is that?" Eddie asked with food in his mouth

"I am going to start working there again on Saturday" she said.

"When did you decide to do that?" Eddie was a little taken a back that she decided without talking to him first.

"This afternoon I guess. I was just sitting around her and thought that it was probably time for me to go back." Janet said nonchalantly

"Don't you think that I might have an opinion about that?" Eddie was getting a bit upset although he wasn't exactly sure why

"I am talking to you about it now. Besides you asked me not that long ago if I was going back. Are you upset or something?" Janet was confused by his reaction

"I just think that if we are getting married Janet that you making a decision to go back to work would affect me too so I should at least be a part of the discussion or maybe the decision." Eddie was trying not to get upset

"Eddie why would it be a problem for me to go back to Sully's…you knew that I would go back…is this about Rooster?" Janet looking him in the eyes now.

"Rooster? Why would he have anything to do with this? Why would you even bring his name up?" Eddie was now angry. He had thought that he was past all of that with Rooster but the mere mention of his name upset him.

"Because he works there and I am going to have to see him and you said that you had forgiven me Eddie. It really seems like you haven't exactly done that." Janet said hurt and started to get up to walk away.

Eddie quickly followed her. "I have forgiven you Janet but I am not going to tell you that it doesn't bother me that you are going to be around him again." This wasn't like Eddie and he wasn't sure why he was reacting this way.

"Eddie either you have or you haven't. Me working around him isn't going to make a difference. I agreed to MARRY YOU that should be enough." Janet was almost in tears thinking that the happiness she was feeling was beginning to crumble.

"Janet I'm sorry. I know that you are committed to me and I trust you it's just that I don't like the fact that he will be there. He got into your head once…" Eddie just couldn't say any more.

"Eddie" Janet walked over to him and grabbed his hand and walked him over to the couch. "I love you and there is nothing that Rooster can say or do to change that. I have to deal with him at some point and you are going to have to let me do that in my own way. He isn't going to get into my head every again because I happen to know that there is no way that anyone can come in between us again, Ok so stop worrying about it." Janet wanted him to be reassured.

"I knew that you would eventually go back to Sully's but I thought that you would talk to me about it first before just going in there. We're together now Janet so we have to talk about this stuff." Eddie looked so disappointed

Janet knew that she had made a mistake in doing this before talking to him and was realizing exactly what being married would mean. She needed to start including Eddie in her decisions, well everything. She truly felt badly.

"I'm sorry Eddie. You're right I should have talked to you about it first. Are you ok with me working there with Rooster?" Janet looked to him

"Yeah I am Janet. I am not happy that you will be around Rooster but you both work there so you will have to deal with that on your own. I settled things with Rooster a long time ago so I guess you will have to do the same. Just don't leave me out of things Janet, ok?" Eddie smiled at Janet for the first time in this whole conversation. He reached out and took her in his arms.

"Ok Eddie, now should we go back and finish dinner?" Janet said trying to lighten the mood.

"No I don't think I am hungry any more. I am pretty beat from work today I think I am just going to head to bed." Eddie kissed her forehead and disappeared into their bedroom

Janet couldn't help but wonder what had just happened. Had she hurt him all over again? Is this really about going back to work or is something else going on? The one thing she did know is that this is the first night since they had been back together that it felt like there was a distance between them and she wasn't sure why. She thought since he wanted to go to bed early that he didn't want to talk about whatever it was tonight but tomorrow she would have to try and talk to him about it. Maybe in the morning he would be more like himself but her stomach told her that something was seriously wrong. She would just have to wait until then.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24:

Eddie went to work the next morning not in the best mood. He had gotten up before Janet and left for work before she ever got out of bed. He wasn't ready to talk to her just yet. He wasn't sure why he had gotten so upset over her return to Sully's but he knew that her making that decision without him was bothering him. He knew it couldn't have anything to do with Rooster because she was right, she agreed to marry him, she was committed to him this much he was sure but somehow these old feelings seemed to have crept back in his head.

Janet awoke to find Eddie already gone off to work. She was so disappointed and confused as he had not done that since they had been back together. He was obviously upset with her but why? Was this really about going back to work? Maybe working at Sully's was not a good idea? She loved working there but maybe Eddie didn't. How could they have gone from so happy to barely speaking in such a small amount of time? Janet just layed back down in her bed as the tears surfaced and ran down her face.

Eddie was at his desk when Nick arrived. He was shocked to see Eddie in so early.

"Since when do you get here so early?" Nick asked.

Eddie just looked at Nick. "What? Since when you do you care what time I get here?" Eddie was clearly in a bad mood.

"What goes on Eddie? You have clearly left Happytown with Janet so talk to me." Nick was concerned by Eddie's obvious edge.

"I don't know Nick. Janet told me last night that she is going to go back to work at Sully's. She didn't even talk to me about it she just decided at some point yesterday and made it happen." Eddie said frustrated.

Nick sat there and thought for a second. "What is the big deal with that? She worked at Sully's before…where is this coming from?"

"Ok and…" Nick said thinking that there was more to the story.

"And what…she didn't even talk to me about it to see how I would feel. We're suppose to be getting married and she is still making decisions without me just like when she decided to move away rather suddenly." Eddie said angrily.

"Oh, so this is about you then." Nick was starting to understand what was going on.

"What are you talking about Nick? It is not about me it is about her!" Eddie was very defensive.

Nick thought how he would say what he was thinking. He then said, "Eddie, I think what is happening here is that you have been on this emotional rollercoaster for a long time. You were so caught up in missing Janet that when she accepted you back in her life and then accepted you back into her home and finally agreed to marry you that you didn't deal with how you felt about her leaving in the first place. You have to talk to her and tell her how you feel. You need to deal with it Eddie or it won't end well, I promise you that."

"What do you mean it won't end well?" Eddie was not following what Nick was saying

Nick said, "Eddie, when you found out she was gone you were angry right?"

Eddie nodded

"Ok, so were you able to talk to her about that since you reunited or have you been so caught up with helping her first then telling her how you feel to get her back in your life that you haven't given yourself the chance to deal with the anger of her leaving. The anger that you felt when you talked to her or yelled whatever in the hospital. If you don't deal with it now than it will continue to come back when she does something that upsets you like going back to work at Sully's, do ya get it?" Nick was hoping he understood.

Eddie sat and thought about what Nick had said. He was right. Eddie had never told Janet how angry he was that she left. That she gave up on their relationship so quickly that she was able to have another relationship with another person when he couldn't. He realized in that moment that he needed to talk to her about all of it. He didn't want to risk losing her but now if he didn't talk to her about it he may end up losing her later on and that was a risk he wasn't willing to take.

Eddie said, "Hey can you manage on your own for a bit, I got some where I need to be."

Nick smiled, "sure thing buddy…but don't forget we got the Truman house this afternoon and Ikey can't do it alone ok so make that makeup session shorter than normal."

Eddie just glared. "I'll be back in plenty of time, dork….and hey thanks." He said with a much lighter expression.

"Anytime buddy." Nick said with a smile.

Janet was still laying in bed wondering what to do. Should she go to BFW and demand to talk to Eddie or maybe she should call Hannah and talk to her about it. Janet felt like that girl way back in the beginning trying to figure out what Eddie was thinking. She hated feeling so lost. How was she supposed to know that he didn't want her to go back to work? How is she suppose to know anything when he doesn't tell her what he is really thinking. As she layed there staring at the ceiling she heard the front door open and close.

"Janet are you here?" a voice came closer to the bedroom

Before Janet could even say a word, Eddie appeared in the doorway.

"Janet we have to talk. I have some things that I need to say and I need you to listen. I am sorry for how I reacted last night but I think I have some things that I need to get off my chest and they aren't going to be easy for you to hear but I think you need to hear them ok?" Eddie was almost rambling at this point.

Janet just looked at him and said, "Ok I'm listening." Janet sat up and was leaning on the head board at this time.

Eddie began to pace back and forth in front of their bed. "Janet I think why I got so angry last night is not so much about you going back to work at Sully's but it is more about you making that decision on your own. Your independence has always been something that I admired in you and your ability to keep me in line when I messed up but that same independence scares me too. When we got in that fight in the hospital and I said what I did to you I never thought that you would actually leave the Ridge. I was angry and hurt and yes I knew that there was a chance that you and I would not work it out but you left – I mean you didn't even give me the chance to talk to you or fight with you or anything. You just left and that was it for you. I was here stuck with no place to go other than your house to yell and scream because I couldn't talk to the one person that I needed too. I couldn't talk to the guys about it. When I realized that you weren't coming back, I tried to move on with my life. I tried to date other people but this feeling just wouldn't go away. It never got past a first date and that is when I realized that I couldn't, Janet, because I compared every girl to you. But then to find out that you had moved on and not only that but you fell in love with another man. I just don't get it Janet how could you have done that? Did I mean anything to you at all? Was it really that easy for you to just fall in bed with another man, again. You cheated on me with Rooster Janet – how did you think I would react. Did you think I would be ok with it? Did you stop and think that maybe I would need some time to calm down or even think about what had happened between the two of us…it was like you gave up on us, just like that." He stopped briefly just to catch his breath a little.

Janet sat there with tears running down her face. She could see the pain on his face and realized that they had never really dealt with her leaving or "had it out" so to speak with her betrayal because so much time had gone past and she was dealing with the loss of Dwayne when Eddie came back into her life. She should have known that that anger would resurface at some point. Going back to Sully's was obviously the trigger.

"Janet, I know that what I did that day with Rory was wrong. I was pushing you away further and further and I know that I made some big mistakes, but what you don't realize is that when Rory came back it was the day that I realized that I was in love with you. That I wanted to be with you and there was no longer any thing holding me back because I reconciled my past with Rory that day. The kiss was all wrong and I wished I would never have put you or I in that situation but I did. I have to live with that. I know that without all the decisions I made that day you would never have been with Rooster that night you would have been with me. I also know that Rooster should never have been there to help you that night because of how he felt about you and about our relationship and after our talk I think he realizes that now. I forgave you Janet because deep down I know why you did what you did. You were hurt. I understand that feeling now more than ever. It is what I felt when Hannah came to my hospital room and told me that you moved away and no one knew where you were. I just don't understand how you could just leave like that? How could you do that?" Eddie just looked down at his hands and then straight at Janet with tears in his eyes.

Janet looked at Eddie with tears of her own. Her heart broke all over again listening to him say the things he just said to her. She knew deep down he was right to be angry with her. She took the cowards way out, but she really hadn't thought there was a chance that he would forgive her and she couldn't bear to see him with Rory. She felt weak and insecure all over again. She couldn't take another run in with him and his angry eyes and felt since she was the one who made such a horrible mistake that he should be allowed to stay and she should go. She never dreamed that he would feel the way he did about her. Now was her only chance to tell him how she felt and try and make him understand.

Janet just then asked Eddie, "Eddie can you please come sit by me?"

Eddie got up reluctantly and sat next to Janet on the bed with eyes facing forward.

Janet turned slightly and took Eddie's hands in hers. Eddie still didn't look at her. She said, "Eddie, I am so sorry for all the hurt that I caused you. I know that leaving like I did wasn't the best way to handle the situation and was entirely selfish on my part but I never ever thought that you would forgive me for what I had done. The look in your eyes that day I will never forget and I just couldn't see that over and over again. I hated the person I had become so weak and insecure. I felt like I lost a part of who I was when we were together. At first it was easy to keep you accountable because you had hurt me in the beginning that I wouldn't let myself fall for you so easily. But as time went on I knew that I was in love with you. When you finally agreed to come to Providence to meet my grands I was over the moon, ya know and I thought that maybe you were starting to feel the same way but you never said anything about how you felt. We were together for almost 8 months Eddie and you never said a word about how you felt. That morning I can remember feeling so happy and in love and couldn't wait to tell you – that is why I put that key in the bag with the cookies but when Rory came back and you practically forgot about my existence I began to feel as though I felt more for you than you had for me. As the day went on and you didn't return my phone calls, you turned your phone off and didn't tell me she was even here – the longer it went on the more worried I became so I decided I would go and talk to you about it…that was the worst. When I saw you two kissing on the front porch I felt like my heart literally was broken. I tried to get a hold of Hannah but couldn't find her anywhere. I spent so many hours crying that my face felt like a punching bag. Rooster called and offered to come over. Why he brought moonshine I will never understand but I drank it nonetheless. I felt like a fool and he said all the right things. I couldn't think straight or see straight but I wanted to feel loved…I wanted you to love me but I really thought that you were with her. It wasn't until the next morning when I got the call and realized that you hadn't been. I thought that my relationship was over with you that night but when Nick called me and told me where you were I knew it was over before I even set foot in your room. What I had done it was unforgivable. When I told you the truth I knew you would be angry but the look on your face, it was just indescribable. I went to Hannah's engagement party and lied to her telling her that you forgave me and all was good. I couldn't tell her the truth. Rooster was there and clearly thinking that we could be together now and all I saw was hatred when I looked at him. He never liked you or our relationship and now he had done his part in destroying the one thing in my life that meant everything to me. I couldn't face any of it. I went home that night and knew that I needed to go. I couldn't stay at Sully's and I didn't know what else to do. So I packed up everything I needed, told Sully I was leaving and went to my Grands for advice. I cried so hard when I drove out of town Eddie because I knew my life would never be the same. But I didn't want to cause you any more pain than I already had. I honestly thought that I was making the right decision. That is how I came to go to Hope because Mrs. Edwardson needed a house sitter. It was only suppose to be for 6 months but they were more ill than the doctor had thought so it lasted longer. I loved living in Hope. I was a mess for several months after I go there. So many emotions I couldn't deal with them. So one day I saw this flyer for a kick boxing class so I joined. It really did help me to get my emotions out. It helped me feel stronger about myself and feel like I would somehow figure it all out eventually. I never asked about you to Hannah because in my heart I thought you were with Rory. That somehow you would be better off without me in your life. I couldn't bear to hear that you were with Rory and how happy you were so I just never asked. I resigned myself to the belief that you were gone forever and for me there would be no second chance. I met Dwayne through kick boxing. He was the instructor and we were friends for the longest time. One day I completely fell apart. He noticed how badly I was doing and offered to listen so I told him everything. He gave me some perspective on the situation but a part of me just didn't believe him. He said that you were most likely not with Rory and that you had realized how amazing I was and probably missed me as much as I missed you. I just didn't believe him because he hadn't seen that look in your eyes that day. He became one of my closest friends in Hope until the day that he told me that he wanted more. That was only a few months before Hannah's wedding. We really didn't date long before he told me the truth of his illness and it progressed so fast that we didn't really have a chance to look at the future – all he had was the present and even that was only weeks before he passed. He made me feel that I was worth so much more than I ever gave myself credit for. All of the people in Hope made me feel that way. It was the first time that I felt like someone other than "Janet the planet". Dwayne in the short time we were together loved me so openly and whole heartedly I had never experienced any thing like it. It was the one thing I never felt when you and I were together. I never had to question how Dwayne felt like I did with you so yeah I did fall in love with him. I will never forget what he did for me Eddie because he made me see how truly beautiful I am on the inside as well as the outside. It is one thing to say it Eddie but to feel it well it is pretty powerful. When I didn't see you for Hannah's wedding I just chalked that up to you had moved on with your life. I wanted you to be happy and I just didn't think that you felt that way when you were with me. I never meant to make you feel as though I didn't care about you or that I didn't love you because I did, I always have and I always will. You are the first man that I ever truly loved and that will never change. No matter what happens from this day on, you will always have that part of my heart that no one else could ever touch – not even Dwayne and he knew that. That is why he made me promise to find you when I came home and talk to you…you just found me first and I was hurting over losing Dwayne. I am so sorry Eddie…" with that Janet looked into Eddie's eyes and looked for some reaction. Eddie sat there still and silent. He wasn't grabbing her hands back and made no move to do so. When Janet felt nothing from Eddie she felt as though she had lost her chance and made a move to go. She couldn't handle sitting there and crying any longer she just needed to go. As she began to move Eddie tightened his grip on her hands. She felt this and turned to look at him. He was looking her in the eyes now with tears of his own on his face.

Eddie said so softly, "Make me a promise right here right now that you won't go anywhere again even if we fight or disagree…you promise me that no matter what happens in our lives that you stay and fight with me and you don't give up Janet because I love you and I won't let you go ever again not knowing how much I care…I promise you that no matter what happens that you will know how I feel…you will never wonder. I know that you are independent but I want to be a part of you Janet so please don't shut me out. We have made mistakes, both of us but I want to start over Janet and build a life together. Can you promise me, Janet?" Eddie felt her body movements to see if she would pull away again hoping that she wouldn't.

Janet looked into Eddie's eyes and said, "I promise you Eddie that I won't ever leave again. No matter what happens with you and me I will stay and work it out with you. I am sorry that I hurt you by leaving. I never meant to do that. I love you Eddie so much. You are the one…you have always been the one…I will never doubt you again Eddie and I am sorry for making the decision to return to Sully's without talking to you first. I won't do that again. I guess I am new to this fiancée thing but I know now that it is just you and me from now on, OK?" Janet was hoping that he would ease up and release the tension she could feel in his hands.

Ever so slightly the bed moved and it was Eddie leaning over and taking Janet in his arms. They sat their for what seemed like hours and held each other both knowing for the first time maybe that their life would be with each other. The past was slowly moving away and Eddie felt his anger move right along with it. He got all of his answers in what she had said and felt now that as long as they talked to each other and made their feelings known that they would be just fine.

Knowing that he would have to go back into work he couldn't really do what he wanted but a little making out wouldn't hurt. He leaned back and kissed Janet so passionately she thought for sure she knew where this was headed. But soon enough he had to say, "Janet I have to go back to work. We have the Truman house this afternoon and I need to help Ikey with it. I promise you though that tonight we will be picking up where this left off so don't make any plans, k?" Eddie said smiling as he began to sit up on the bed.

"I'll be at home…" Janet said so sweetly

Eddie just smiled, waved and walked out the door and out of the house. He thought to himself as he got in his truck, "I like the sound of that" With that Eddie headed back in to BFW.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25:

The day had been long but Eddie was looking forward to returning to his home and to Janet. His mood had definitely lightened up since the morning and Nick couldn't have been happier. He noticed a change in Eddie. He seemed to be tackling things head on now instead of avoiding them or pushing them aside as he had since Nick had returned home. He knew that Eddie and Janet would be ok because there was no doubt in his mind that they loved each other.

Eddie got home and was in desperate need for a shower. He walked in and the house was dark. He was confused because she said she would be home. He started to get upset until he reached the bedroom and found candles and a tub full of bubbles and his fiancée. He got the biggest smile on his face.

"I thought that maybe you would need to wash up when you got home and I thought I would help you with that." Janet said smiling

Eddie just looked at Janet. He could not have been happier in that moment. He began to remove his clothing all while looking in her eyes. Janet didn't turn away she held his eyes the entire time. He slipped into the tub just behind Janet and he wrapped his arms around her. They didn't need to really talk any more but they did need to be close. Janet sank into his embrace and they stayed that way for quite some time. The water began to turn cold and Janet thought maybe it was time to finish what they had started. She turned to face Eddie and began to kiss him deeply. He responded with the same intensity. They began moving their hands all over one another but knew that they would need to take this to their bedroom. Just then Janet pulled away from Eddie and said, "Why don't you finish up with your shower and I'll be waiting for you."

Eddie just looked at her contemplating if he really needed that shower but then he remembered his day and thought he better finish up. It was seriously the quickest shower he had ever taken.

Eddie walked into their bedroom and there was Janet in what looked like the sexiest silk t shirt he had ever seen. She was laying on her side facing the bathroom waiting for him to return. Her hair was wild and free flowing with curls and the look on her face was pure love.

He walked up to the bed and just stared at Janet as she slowly rolled over onto her back awaiting him to get in with her. He slowly climbed on the bed and over Janet. He began to slowly kiss her and work his way around her body. This began the night they spent together as soon to be husband and wife with their past truly behind them and them celebrating with each other the start of their future.

They both awoke early in the morning with big smiles. Eddie was behind Janet snuggled up tight with his arms around her. She had never felt so secure and loved before. Eddie had never slept this way before with her and she knew that their relationship was going to be different this time.

Janet began to move a bit and Eddie responded with kisses to her neck. "Good morning" she said.

"Good morning to you" Eddie said barely relenting his position or kissing her neck.

"Ahh Eddie you do realize that you have to work today right?" She said not moving either because truth be told she didn't want him to stop.

"Ahh yeah Janet I do but not right now." Eddie chuckled a bit.

"Ok just checking." Janet said just savoring the attention and hoping that they could stay that way all day.

Eddie suddenly realized that he needed to get ready to go even though he didn't want to. He pulled Janet over so she was facing him and kissed her properly. He had noticed since they returned home to the Ridge she was no longer shy in any way in regards to being with him. She didn't seem to care if lights were on or how much clothing she had on. He knew that she had grown in Hope and loved every bit of her new found confidence in herself. He planned to show her everyday how much he loved her to keep her feeling that confidence.

"Your right I do need to go to work but tonight is Friday and since you have to work tomorrow how about we go out for dinner or something tonight…maybe get a movie or go see a movie…what do ya think?" Eddie said still kissing her neck a bit.

"That sounds great. I think I am going to try and catch up with Hannah today. I haven't talked to her in a bit. You have a wonderful day soon to be husband of mine." Janet said kissing him back.

"I love the sound of that." Eddie kissed her one last time and got up to go shower.

"Ya know, I could still use some of that help in the shower…my back is so hard to reach." He said seductively.

Janet smiled. She loved this playfulness between them. "Well in that case how could I say no." Janet got up and followed Eddie into the shower.

After their rather lengthy shower, Janet put her robe on and went to fix him some breakfast. They ate together and he headed out the door but not before he kissed her properly goodbye. Janet just smiled and thought, "that will never get old."

"Hey what are you up to today?" Janet had just called Hannah

"Hey there yourself. Not much. What are you up to today?" Hannah was excited to hear from Janet it had been days since they last spoke.

"I was hoping we could get some gabbing in today are ya free…I can be there in 5 minutes…with coffee." Janet said smiling

"Well in that case make it 3 minutes." Hannah chuckled as she hung up the phone.

Janet walked in the door of Hannah's kitchen within minutes with two large coffee cups.

Hannah shrieked "YAY!" She came over and grabbed one of the cups from Janet's hand.

They both walked into the living room and started talking about all the stuff going on in each others lives.

"So yeah that was yesterday…it was scary because somewhere in my brain I knew that he would have to talk about that anger but he seemed so happy I just didn't see it coming." Janet was finishing up her conversation about her recent fight with Eddie.

"You know Janet he was so lost when you were gone. At first I was so angry at him for telling you off like he did. I thought he was so self absorbed and full of himself not taking responsibility for what he did that day. But when I told him you were gone, the look on his face was something I may not ever be able to get out of my head. I knew at that point that he was in love with you. At the time I was just so angry but as time went on we all saw it. I know that you did what you felt you needed to but if you would have stayed you may have gotten together sooner. Regardless, it is good that you both worked through it. That is not something you want hanging out there, ya know?" Hannah said and taking a sip of her coffee.

"Ya, I know what you mean. But in my defense I needed to get away from here to find myself again Hannah. I was so pathetic in that situation. I still haven't dealt with Rooster yet and I am starting at Sully's again tomorrow…that is what started the argument with Eddie in the first place." Janet said looking at Hannah

"I didn't know you were planning on going back. What Eddie didn't want you working there because of Rooster?" Hannah asked.

"No it was because I decided to go and talk to Sully and didn't talk to Eddie first. I guess I have to get used to talking with him about all my decisions. It just seems foreign to me still…speaking of which we set a wedding date." Janet said nonchalantly.

"When did you do that…in between the arguing? Which I do have to say that Eddie is right, when you are making decisions like that it is always best to talk to him first. He doesn't have to give his permission but I think he just wants to feel a part of your life Janet. You can be so independent ya know." Hannah looked at Janet to see her response.

"I know, I know he said that too. He said that my independence scares him sometimes. I just get so used to being on my own I have to keep reminding myself that I am getting married. Ohh, which did I mention our wedding is the first weekend in August so don't plan to be doing any thing else but being my maid of honor." Janet smiled.

Hannah looked at Janet in shock, "This coming August as in a few months away…wow I guess he wants to be with you. Where are you having it?" She asked.

"We decided to have it at the Paine Gardens…you know that place just outside of town with the manicured gardens and beautiful flowers. We thought that would be perfect in late July early August and that was one of the only weekends they still had open." Janet said

"Well it all sounds perfect and of course I will be by your side the whole time. I can't believe you are getting married…AHHHH." Hannah just screamed in delight.

Janet looked at her friend and laughed. They talked some more before Hannah had to run off to the Vet's office.

Janet had returned home and decided to read a bit before Eddie returned home from work. She was looking forward to spending some time with her fiancée tonight. She had some apprehension about returning to work tomorrow as the issue with Rooster would resurface. The one thing that she did know was that she would definitely talk to Eddie about it. She knew that in some respects that she would always retain some level of her independence but if Eddie wanted to be more a part of her life she needed to let him in and that included resolving old issues. She was entering new territory with this whole marriage idea but she knew that there was nothing in her life she wanted more than to be with Eddie and if she had to spend her life time figuring it out than that is what she was committed to do. "No more running Janet, it is time to face your life head on and realize that you aren't alone anymore" she smiled at the thought. She opened her book and began to read with a sense of calm and resolve. For the time being, her life was good.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26:

Eddie arrived home a little later than he had expected because the job they had worked on during the day had everything wrong with it. He knew that Janet would be upset and their evening plans wouldn't quite work out the way he had planned.

When he walked into the living room he found Janet asleep on the couch with a book resting on top of her chest with her hands grabbing either side of the book. Eddie smiled as he knew she probably was reading until he got home and fell asleep in the process. He almost didn't want to wake her up but he didn't want their last night before she started working again to be spent separately.

Eddie walked up to Janet and kissed her softly. At first Janet didn't move but then it was as if the sensation just registered in her brain and she started to move a bit. She didn't open her eyes though. Eddie was surprised that she was sleeping so soundly. He leaned down and kissed her again this time with a little more pressure. Once again Janet moved a bit but still didn't wake up. Eddie was starting to get worried. Just as Eddie leaned down to shake Janet awake she grabbed his shirt on either side and pulled him on top of her. She kissed him with lots of passion this time and couldn't help but smile a little while she was doing it because she knew she had gotten him good.

Eddie just looked at Janet as they pulled apart with him still resting on top of her and smiled. He said, "You are one sneaky girl you know that. I was starting to wonder if you were ok and you were playing me all along…Nicely done Meadows."

Janet sat up with Eddie right by her side. "Sorry I couldn't resist…it was hard to keep from smiling though" She said with a smile. "I was sort of expecting you a little earlier. I must have fallen asleep reading." She started to stretch a bit.

"Yeah I'm sorry babe, the window job today had just about everything that could go wrong go wrong so it took longer than I thought. So what would you like to do tonight?" Eddie said truly hoping that she wanted to watch a movie in instead of out.

"Well you are probably exhausted and I am no where near ready to go out, how about we order ourselves some fine Chinese food and get a movie and curl up on this very couch and enjoy ourselves at home…I know it isn't as awesome as what you had planned but I am thinking I may be able to make the end of the evening just as fun…what do ya say?" Janet said with the sweetest yet seductive tone to her voice.

Eddie thought to himself, "Just when I think things can't get any better?" He said, "That sounds like the best idea of my entire day. Why don't you order the Chinese, I'll go grab and movie and we'll meet back here on this very couch in 20."

Janet smiled and held up her hand to high five him and said, "Ok go!" Janet leaped off the couch and so did Eddie. 20 minutes later Eddie was not only back from getting a movie but was just stepping out of the shower when the door bell rang for the Chinese food that Janet ordered. She got the door and headed into the living room with the bag of food and a couple of beers. They arrived at the same time to sit on the couch and began to dig into the food.

About an hour later they were curled up into each other on the couch watching the movie that Eddie had gotten. Eddie had noticed that Janet seemed a little distracted and didn't seem to the watching the movie at all but deep in thought. He paused the movie suddenly and said, "So what is going on in that brain of yours…not so much into the movie?" he said.

"Well there is something I wanted to talk to you about but I didn't want to interrupt your movie…you seem to be really enjoying it." Janet said

"I am all ears…what goes on?" Eddie looked at Janet trying to figure out what was on her mind.

"I made a promise to you that I would let you in…to me and not do things without talking to you first. I know that what I am going to say is probably going to upset you but I just didn't feel right about handling it on my own without talking to you first." She looked at him to see how he was taking what she was saying so far.

Eddie was looking at Janet and listening intently. He was so happy hearing her say that she was letting him in. He was a little nervous about what she wanted to talk about but he felt so comfortable knowing that she totally understood him when they had their talk.

"When I go back to Sully's tomorrow I have one last thing that I need to deal with and that is Rooster. I know that you said that you talked to him and dealt with your feelings about it but I haven't. When we were together before I kept some things to myself but now we are together and part of that is sharing everything, even the parts that hurt. It is hard when you feel so betrayed by someone that you trusted. The one person that you felt would always be there if you needed them. The person with whom you thought you would always have in your life to count on through everything. Before I had you to fulfill that in me I had Rooster. He was the one who I could always count on to be my friend, who would listen to me, defend me when the drunks would get out of hand or even when people would say not so nice things about me. I had resigned myself at some point that I would probably always be single but he made feel that I wasn't alone. Rooster was one of my closest friends since we were kids in elementary school. To have that person put themselves first at a time when you need them the most it so hard to understand and almost impossible to forgive. I know that I am responsible for what I did that night and I have to live with that but I am so angry, Eddie. I was at my lowest point that night. I was drunk and crying my eyes out thinking that you were with Rory and all he could think about was what he wanted. He wasn't being my friend any more he was being a selfish guy. I needed the person who had been my friend since we were 5. The one who would defend me from jerks at the bar and even if I started dating someone who he absolutely couldn't stand, I needed him to be my friend when that relationship fell apart. I know that I have said that forgiveness is the best way around a disappointment but what if that disappointment is so catastrophic that there is no forgiveness? What if that person hurt you to your core so deeply that the mere sight of them brings back the memory of the biggest mistake you have ever made…putting your faith and trust into someone who maybe never really deserved it. Maybe it is a mistake to go back to work at Sullys…maybe I need to find somewhere else…." By this time, Janet was talking with her hands and pacing back and forth in front of the coffee table.

Eddie sat there and listened to Janet. He saw the raw emotion coming from Janet and realized in that moment just how deeply Rooster hurt her by what he had allowed to happen. Janet trusted him so completely she never saw the potential in that situation coming until it was upon her and she was so upset and intoxicated, he would have had to be the one to stop it. He wasn't thinking of her at that point as his friend. Eddie's heart broke in a strange way listening to what she said because some of what she was saying could be said of her actions towards him that night and his actions with Rory. So many mistakes and so much hurt was caused by what seemed like innocent decisions, one right after the other – but so devastating when put all together. As he listened he could feel her open herself up to him and pouring out what was in her heart in a way she had not done before. He had never felt so sure of anything in his life as he did in that moment knowing that Janet had finally let him in completely.

"Janet, you are hurt and I can see it now just how much but I think the only way that you can move past this is to talk to Rooster. You may never be able to understand why he did what he did that night but you can at least have the chance to speak your mind and put to rest your feelings about what happened that night. We all made mistakes that night Janet. We all played a role in the damage to our relationship and your friendship. I'm not going to lie Janet I can't stand the guy and he was never a fan of me that is for sure but I am going to leave the decision up to you whether you want him in your life or not. As much as I don't want to say this, I know exactly what it feels like to have lost you and felt as though there was a part of me missing and I wouldn't really want to wish that on anyone, even him but I know that he feels that way…he was in love with you so I know he feels that way." Eddie said that last part softly and with a slight sense of compassion.

Janet just looked at Eddie as if someone had stolen her Eddie and replaced him with someone else. "Eddie I appreciate what you just said and I am so sorry for what I put you through when I was gone. I would never have left knowing that you may feel differently towards me. I don't think that I will ever be able to be friends with Rooster again because too much has happened between us to ever go back. I do need to resolve my anger with him for me to move on. Rooster made his choice that night with a clear mind and conscious thought. He choose himself over me that night – he wasn't defending me, he wasn't keeping me safe, he wasn't even listening to me – all his mind saw was an opening and he used that to his advantage. A true friend wouldn't do that. A true friend what have told me that I needed to stop drinking and wait until the morning to see what was really going on. If I had only done that this whole year would have been so different." Janet said now with tears in her eyes.

"Janet I understand why you wanted to talk to me about this and it means a lot to me that you opened up about your feelings but I think you already know what you need to do and I really envisioned this evening being more about us and less about Rooster…" Eddie said looking at Janet hoping to lighten the mood a bit and to selfishly get to the part that Janet had mentioned earlier.

Janet looked at Eddie and smiled. He was right. She just wanted to share this with him to show him that she was committed to this relationship and to him. She knew that the conversation wasn't going to be easy with Rooster but right now she decided that it was time to worry more about spending her last night with her fiancée. She walked over to Eddie and straddled his lap. He leaned back on the couch with a big grin on his face.

Janet looked into her eyes and put her hands around his neck. She said so softly, "Thank you for listening to me. I will never understand how I got so lucky to find you once in my life but twice but I can promise you there won't be a third time because I am never letting you go, Mr. Latekka." She slowly began to kiss Eddie.

Eddie thought to himself, "oh goody now the fun begins."

With that they spent the rest of the night in each others arms, enjoying the fact that her shift didn't start until 3pm the next day because neither one planned on sleeping very much tonight.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27:

Eddie and Janet were still lying in bed at 11:30 in the morning on the day that Janet was to return to Sully's. They had spent most of the night enjoying each other, making love repeatedly through out the night. There was something different between them, a sense of belonging and a closeness that neither one had ever felt before, even with each other. Eddie felt that Janet had finally let him into her heart fully and was no longer keeping a part of herself separate from him. Janet felt more secure in Eddie's love than she had ever before. The two of them were so close both felt as though there was nothing that they couldn't handle as long as they were together.

Eddie started to move around first and Janet soon followed. Janet began to stretch and Eddie naturally wrapped his arms around her. She turned to face Eddie and they kissed the sweetest little kiss. She than pulled back and said, "I'd better get into the shower since I got to be to work in a few hours and we definitely should eat some lunch before I go, don't you agree?" Janet raised her eyebrow as if insinuating they built up quite an appetite over the night's events.

Eddie said with a smile, "I definitely agree but I think that I should help you with that shower…I could help you with your back just as you did with mine." Eddie raised his eyebrow in just the same way.

Janet laughed and said, "I think I can manage that." With that the two headed into the bathroom for a not so quick shower to start off their day.

The time had come for Janet to return to Sully's and Eddie had insisted to come with her to have a drink on her first day back. She thought he was being kind of silly until she walked in and saw the biggest banner she had ever seen with the words "Welcome back home Janet" written across it with what seemed like a thousand signatures all over it. Apparently Sully was a bit more excited about her return then she thought.

As she took her place behind the bar and Eddie took his usual spot on his stool at the bar she looked at him as if to say, "You knew about this all along didn't you." Eddie just smiled and took a drink of the draft she had just placed in front of him.

As she looked over the banner she saw signatures of so many people from town. All of the regulars were accounted for and many others that she didn't quite remember or perhaps hadn't known their names were also on there. Then she saw Eddie's chicken scratching and she nearly got tears in her eyes. He wrote, "welcome home to the best person I know…I love you….Eddie" It seemed silly to her but seeing it written there for everyone to see was just so special to her. Sure he had said it frequently since they got back together but there was a sense of realness to seeing it written along with everyone else's notes and signatures. She felt so much at home just as she had grown to feel in Hope. It felt so different being back, as though this town had a whole new appreciation for her. She still couldn't believe it but was so happy that she had decided to come back.

The one person whom she didn't see was Rooster. She was so hoping to resolve her issues with him tonight but maybe Sully scheduled him off or something, she thought. Sully walked up to Janet and gave her the biggest hug. "Welcome back Janet – we are so happy to have you back behind the bar!" Sully said with a booming voice and smile. Just then one of the regulars screamed, "You got that right, these guys don't know what their doing back there." Suddenly a roar of laughter broke out and Janet felt as though she was truly home.

Hours had passed and everyone was having a good night. Janet didn't really need much time to get back into the swing of things. Everyone had their drinks refreshed in proper time and Janet was back to socializing with the regulars just as she had before. People were curious about where she had been but were respectful when asking what she had been up all this time. There were no more rude comments about anything in regards to her. It was exactly the opposite. It seemed to Janet that everyone was truly happy to see her and have her back behind the bar, well that was except for one.

Rooster had come into Sully's a few hours after Janet had arrived. He didn't look at her or even make an attempt to talk to her. Eddie watched as he made his entrance tried to see how Janet reacted to it. Eddie knew that Janet and Rooster would need to talk about it but he really wasn't looking forward to seeing them both in the same place at the same time. He realized that he may never be totally comfortable with Rooster being a part of her life but he knew that it would be up to Janet if Rooster remained her friend or not.

When Janet returned to the end of the bar where Eddie was sitting, he said, "Hey I am heading home. I'm going to catch the game on the comfort of our couch!" Eddie smiled.

Janet said, "Ok I'll see y a when I get home and don't worry I'll be fine, K?" Janet knew that he was not comfortable with her working with Rooster but she also knew that she needed to deal with it and Eddie was giving her the space she needed to do just that.

"Oh I know you will, see ya later." He leaned over, took her face in his hands and kissed her passionately. The bar started to make sounds at the two love birds and Eddie leaned back and said, "Hey you go get your own, this one is mine!" Janet just looked down a little and her eyebrow went up. She smiled and said, "Yep this girl is 100% taken" lifting up her finger to show off her beautiful engagement ring. Eddie was just beaming at this point and said softly to Janet, "I'll see ya at home. I'll be awake when you get home if you need to talk, ok?" With that he turned to leave putting his arm up with a wave.

Janet was left to deal with the bar and all their questions. Some people were aware of their engagement but some weren't but all were very happy it seemed. Several hours later the bar was really slow and most everyone had headed home, only a few regulars were left in the bar. Ikey, of course, was passed out in the corner booth as usual and a few other regulars were sitting at the end of the bar arguing over the game that they were watching. Sully had gone home hours ago so it was Rooster and Janet to clean up and close down the bar. Officially Rooster was to close it down so Janet could go home when it slowed down but she stuck around because she wanted to talk to Rooster.

The opportunity came when they were washing up the glasses and seemed to be standing in the same place for the first time that night. Rooster had kept his distance for the most part not really knowing what to say to her or how she felt about him. Rooster had spent a great deal of time thinking about what had happened with Janet that faithful night after he had the talk with Eddie. He came to some conclusions that were very difficult for him. One was that Eddie was truly in love with Janet and probably always had been so Rooster's constant insulting of him to Janet was only hurting Janet because it made her doubt Eddie's feelings towards her and secondly, and perhaps more importantly, he realized that he hadn't been a very good friend to Janet. That hurt him the most because she was the only one who remembered his birthdays, was always there when he needed her the most and made him feel as though he mattered in this world when he felt so small. The one time when she needed him the most, when she called him so upset, he betrayed her. He thought only of himself that night, an opportunity to get what he wanted and he didn't really think about what she really needed. What she needed was a friend that put her first but instead he failed, it turns out the he wasn't that good of a friend after all. He was hoping that at some point he would be able apologize to her and maybe just maybe they could be friends again, although he knew that was unlikely.

Janet decided that she should make the first move. She needed to deal with Rooster before this got in the way of their job. "Hey Rooster, can we talk?" Janet said with little to no expression.

"Yeah, sure." Rooster said but didn't know what else to say.

"I think we need to talk about what happened last year. I have some things I need to say to you and I would like you to hear me out before you say anything. Can you do that?" Janet asked.

"Yeah Janet that is the least I owe you." Rooster put his bar rag down and faced Janet.

Janet took a deep breath and began, "First of all, I think that we need to settle some things. We are going to be working together again and I need you to understand some things that I have realized over this past year. Rooster you were my friend and I valued our friendship greatly but I did not appreciate how you tried every chance you got to undermine my relationship with Eddie. I have always been there for you Rooster and I can't understand for the life of me how you can look at me and say that you did the right thing that night. " Janet said taking a breath. Rooster started to speak and Janet just raised a finger and Rooster knew she wasn't finished.

"When Eddie and I first started dating, I can understand that you were trying to look out for me but you couldn't let it go and that is what bothers me. When you came to my house that night, Rooster I needed a friend. I called you because I needed someone who would not judge me, one that would give me Kleenex for my tears and one that would just listen to me cry. I did not need a friend that took advantage of a very intoxicated girl who was an emotional wreck, heartbroken and think, hmmm this seems like a good time to get her in bed. How could you possibly think that I was ready for anything in between my drinking and sobs for Eddie? Did you honestly think that I would want to start a relationship with you right at that point? Did I look like I was in love with you Rooster? Did I look like I wanted to commit to you? What exactly did you see in me that night Rooster that would give you any indication that I wanted anything other than someone to help me understand what was happening with Eddie. I had just seen the kiss between Rory and Eddie and I clearly wasn't thinking as evidenced by all the moonshine shots that I drank that you brought over by the way. Come on, Rooster, did you honestly think in that moment that we really had a chance at a relationship when I was telling you that I was in love with Eddie?"

Rooster just looked at Janet. He knew what she was saying was the truth and he really had no real answer for her other than the one he had come to understand and live with. "You're right Janet I was selfish that night. I had all these feelings for you and I guess I just wanted to know what it felt like to be with you, even if it was just for that night. I wasn't thinking about how much you were in pain or even that Eddie was a factor because I always felt that you were better off with out him…I thought that if you had just seen him kissing Rory that you would give up on him and consider me. I just thought Eddie did what he always does and that is move on to the next girl. I have had a lot of time to think about what happened and what I did. I wasn't a friend to you Janet, that night or basically while you were dating Eddie. If I hadn't spent so much time trying to put doubt in your head about Eddie and his motivation for dating you then maybe you would have confronted him directly instead of calling me. I never gave Eddie a chance because I didn't want to believe that he was even remotely interested in you and not for the reasons you think but for the simple fact that I was never able to tell you how I felt about you and when I saw the two of you together I knew right then that I would never have my chance." Rooster said now looking down.

"Why would you do that to me Rooster? You and I have been friends since we were little. I have always stuck up for you – even when you did really stupid things. I never gave up on you or our friendship but you couldn't even support me not even for a minute when it came to Eddie. That walk down Eddie's past conquests, really Rooster, that was just hurtful. How could you throw my biggest insecurity basically in my face? What were you really trying to prove? I'll tell you how I see it. You were basically telling me that I wasn't good enough because I didn't look like those girls. You never thought that maybe Eddie was looking for something more for him self than what he was previously dating, did you? No instead you thought it would be good to point out that all he wanted was to use me because there wasn't anyone else right? How flattering Rooster! What a great friend you were. OH, and lets not forget about all your feelings for me, so instead of telling me how you felt you thought chipping away at my relationship and my self esteem would be a much better approach. You were slowly doing more damage to me than Eddie or anyone else ever could. You might as well have been the one calling me 'Janet the planet' yourself. Do you feel like a friend now Rooster, do you? Do you feel like you 'had my back'? God, Rooster, I would have never done that to you, not ever. The biggest mistake of my entire life was to even think for a second that you loved me. That night when I was at my lowest and wanted so desperately for Eddie to feel the same about me as I did him I turned to you, in a drunken haze listening to all those words. Words that meant nothing to me because they were coming from the wrong person but in that moment I wanted to feel loved and I made the mistake of kissing you. The entire time I was envisioning Eddie but in reality it was you. I am not proud of how I behaved that night and I know that I should never have asked you why you loved me or kissed you. That is a regret that I will have to live with forever. But what will you have to live with Rooster? The one time that you could have been there for me, truly supported me – been the voice of reason…you were the totally sober one Rooster and still your selfishness won out over my feelings. Did it matter to you at all that I was heartbroken? Did it ever occur to you to tell me to go sleep it off and just talk to Eddie about what happened or maybe to go over there and stand up for me instead you thought taking me to bed was the answer. I know that this is not all your fault and I share the blame for that night but what you did to me over the course of our friendship is unforgiveable." Janet said becoming angrier.

Ikey started to come out of his drunken stooper just then and could hear people yelling or arguing or something. He adjusted slightly in his seat and blinked his eyes a few times to figure out who it was. He saw Janet and Rooster practically yelling at each other or it was more like Janet yelling at Rooster. He tried to focus to find out what was going on.

Rooster had nothing that he could say. She was right. She was right about everything. He thought he couldn't feel lower than he did after talking to Eddie but he was wrong.

Janet began to pace a bit in what looked her trying to figure out what to say next. "Rooster, I made such a horrible mistake that night that cost me the love of my life, one of my best friends and a year of my life. I can't say that moving to Hope was entirely a bad thing because it gave me the opportunity to really look at myself and discover me again, something that I realize now you were a part of destroying over the course of the many years that we were friends. I don't know if I will ever be able to understand why you did some of the things you did other than to keep me down. You kept me thinking that I was lesser of a person than I was and not only with Eddie but even before he came into the picture and for what? So you would always have a friend by your side? I just don't understand how you be so cruel to someone who you claim to love. Whenever I think back to anything I tried or thought about trying you just tried to stop me. I can't think of one thing I did you ever supported. Just like working here, you always said I was too clutzy and wouldn't be able to handle all the drunks. How about the time when I applied to go to college, you thought that was a waste of money because no one in the Ridge would hire me – it was too small a town – I'd have to move far away. All of these years Rooster you have done everything in your power to keep me thinking that I wasn't good enough for anything, but I let you do it didn't I. I believed you thinking that you were someone I could trust, you were just telling me like it was – the truth hurts right? That is all over with Rooster. There is nothing that you can say to me any more because I am done believing you. I am done thinking that you were ever my friend. I am done with all the negativity. I have the most amazing man at home waiting for me to come home. A man who asked me to be his wife and made a promise to me to spend his life loving me and proving to me that people like you are not worthy of me. That is reality Rooster. That is my reality. We have to work together here at Sully's but beyond that Rooster, you and I have nothing more to talk about or say. I deserve a hell of a lot better than someone like you who could never really see that even as my friend. I am thankful every day that Eddie gave me another chance because the one thing that you will never understand about Eddie is that there is so much more to him than what people see. Eddie and I are exactly the same that way, if you ever really cared about me you would have seen that too." Janet was talking a bit more quietly but when Eddie's name was brought up Ikey perked up to hear what she had to say.

Janet continued, "What you failed to recognize in Eddie was someone who was trying to find his way too. He lived his life the way others wanted to see of him but he didn't live it the way he wanted until he decided to ask me out." Janet held up her left hand so Rooster could see her engagement ring. "This is my future. This is what it is like to have someone by your side…supporting you, loving you, encouraging you, making the things that seem impossible possible…that is what true relationships are based on….that is what true friendships are built on. Eddie is the love of my life and my best friend and now I won't settle for anything less from anyone. " Janet paused slightly and said rather quietly, "This is the last time we will talk about that night or our former friendship. We are now two coworkers working at Sully's no more no less. You will have to live with what you have done and I will as well but my only hope for you Rooster, and I mean this as sincerely as I can, you need to take what I have said to heart because if you ever plan to have any friends in your future or maybe a relationship don't repeat the mistakes you made with me because one day you may wake up and realize that you are truly alone in this world and have no one but yourself to hold responsible. Just think about what I said." With that Janet walked away and tended to the only two other people left in the bar besides Ikey.

Rooster stood there and said to him self so quietly, "I already am." He turned and went into the kitchen.

Ikey just sat there trying to make sense of all that was said. He had always wondered what it was about Janet that Eddie had been so attracted to but after hearing the things that Janet had said he knew now exactly what it was. Janet was the first and maybe the only girl that saw Eddie for who he truly was, not just the captain of the football team in high school or his good looks or physical appearance but who he was as a man. Janet knew him and believed in him and brought out the best in him. All those women that he slept with before Janet didn't really want a relationship with him they wanted to say that they got to sleep with the great Eddie Latekka – the image, the legend not the man but Janet didn't want the legend she wanted the man. That is why Eddie was so protective of her in the bar that night years ago when Nicky had first come back to town and I was making jokes about her…he knew even then that she was special and obviously his feelings for her were there even then. Maybe he felt like he was more than just a legend when he was with her. Maybe he knew she saw in him all of his possibilities and not just the past. It is easier to be the star and live on through your glory days than to live the life you have in the present. Maybe Eddie wanted to be more than just a football star from high school. Maybe he wanted to do something more noteworthy than what he had been doing so far in his life. Janet was the one that made Eddie see his own possibilities. Ikey knew now why Janet had meant so much to Eddie and he had a whole new appreciation and respect for and of her. She had never really been 'Janet the planet', she was so much more than that.

Just then Janet walked up to Ikey who was lost in his thoughts. "Hey Ikey, do ya want me to call ya a cab?" Janet said with a smile.

"Yeah Janet thanks." Ikey said with a smile.

"You're welcome." With that Janet walked away.

Janet called for the cab and got all three of the patrons out of Sully's and safely in their respective cabs. She yelled to Rooster that she was heading out and he could finish closing. Rooster never returned out front until after she had left for the night, but yelled, "OK!"

Janet made the short drive home and was happy to see the lights on in the living room. She was very much looking forward to getting in bed as it had been a busy night but more importantly with Eddie by her side. When she walked in she saw Eddie curled up on the couch watching ESPN. The highlights of the night's games were scrolling across the screen and as she looked closer Eddie was fast asleep. Janet just smiled loving the fact that he tried to stay up and wait for her. She turned off the TV and started picking up the living room and putting stuff away in the kitchen. Eddie woke up right away when she shut off the TV but didn't make it off the couch until she was already in the kitchen. He walked into the kitchen really quietly and walked right up behind her. He wrapped his arms around her and she jumped slightly not having heard him walk in there.

"Hey there beautiful how was work?" Eddie said as he pressed against her back and nuzzled his head on her shoulder. 

"I thought you were asleep" Janet said as she turned around still in his grasp.

"I was but when you turned the TV off I woke up…I must have just dozed off. So how did things go tonight?" Eddie asked

"How long did you know about the little party and banner thing, you are so sneaky there Mr. Latekka." Janet said with a smile

"Sully mentioned something about it shortly after you told me that you were coming back. He did all of that himself though. It turns out that I was not the only one who missed you when you were gone. I am happy that he did that because I think you needed to know just how much people care about you around here." Eddie said truthfully.

"I had no idea that people felt that way. I have heard so many negative comments about myself my whole life I guess I wasn't expecting people to react that way. It was nice to see. It was good to be back." Janet said rather distractedly.

"So how did the other thing go…I saw Rooster walk in shortly before I left." Eddie was concerned about that conversation and how Janet felt about it.

"It went. I said what I needed to say. It felt good to say some of the things but some of the other things hurt. Remembering what I did, just doesn't feel good Eddie. I wish I could take so many things back but I can't. I wish I could have seen what he had been doing all along, all those years but I didn't." Janet said looking down

Eddie was a bit lost now. He knew she was going to talk about that night but what was she talking about for all these years. He said, "I think you lost me Janet. What do you mean all these years."

Janet began, "when I was in Hope I spent a lot of time dealing with my feelings, towards you and towards Rooster. I must have gone over the events of that night a million times trying to figure out how I could have done such a stupid thing. I kept coming back to the same thing and that was how I felt about myself and where I went wrong with my confidence in you, in me and in us. Why I felt like I wasn't good enough or why I thought I wasn't good enough for you. It got me thinking about me and Rooster and our friendship since we were like 5. I began to remember things that he said to me about other people and how those comments had become so engrained in my head. I think over the course of our friendship he was slowing tearing me down."

Eddie thought for a second, "why would he do that Janet if he was your friend? I still don't understand." He said concerned.

"I think he thought if he made me doubt myself than I would never stop being his friend. That he would be the person that I would always come to and he would say something that would rationalize everything to his perspective…almost like keeping me dependant on him…like he was the only one who cared. I started to think of all the things he used to say and then when you first asked me out when he was so negative and not happy for me. He took me on this 'walk of shame' of these girls that you had slept with to prove to me that I was not like any of those girls, like I wasn't good enough." Janet said quietly looking up at Eddie

Eddie looked at her and he then realized, "that was the speech at Sully's on homecoming weekend and why you compared yourself to all those girls…that was because of him." Eddie was getting upset all over again.

"Yeah that was because of him. The point is that I have let him demean me almost my whole life with out realizing it. I confronted him tonight about it all. I told him basically that we have to work together and that is all our relationship is going to be from this point on. I have no interest in a friendship with him because he wasn't really my friend to begin with. I can't change my life and what it was like before I left the Ridge but I have total control over it now and I am not going to have people in my life who can see me for who I really am. I deserve better than that." Janet said with a confidence that Eddie had rarely seen but was seeing much more of now than before.

Eddie smiled the biggest smile. He was so proud of her and listening to her say that she deserved so much more was about the best thing next to her saying "yes" when he asked her to marry him. If truth be told he wasn't upset at all that she didn't want to be friends with Rooster any more either. "You know I think that you have done what you set out to do and although some of what you said makes me angry at him even more I realize something very important…and that is that there is no punishment worse than losing you so as long as you are fine with it all so am I." He said and leaned down and whispered in her ear…"so are you ready for bed?"

Janet looked into Eddie's eyes and he leaned forward and laughed. "Sure but I warn you, we need to actually sleep tonight!."

Eddie looked at her and said with a mischievous grin, "of course, what did you think I meant." With that the two headed for bed at the end of a very long day.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28:

Time had been flying by for Janet and Eddie. Janet realized that she had better get started with the planning process of her wedding pretty darn soon because it was only a few months away. They had reserved the Paine Gardens for the first weekend in August and decided that since they had really met and gotten to know each other that their reception would be at Sully's. Sully decided that his gift to two of his favorite people would be the close Sully's for the night and make it a night to remember for the couple. When he asked Janet what she thought, she thought it would be perfect. Their guest list wasn't huge and with Sully's closed to the public it would certainly accommodate everyone nicely. When Janet talked to Eddie about it and appeared to happy with it but only if Janet was ok with it.

"Are you sure that is where you want to have it?" Eddie asked kind of thinking that Janet would want something a bit more fancy.

"It sounds perfect to me Eddie. We decided on the gardens because it reminded us both of how we found our love again and Sully's was the place that it all started really, where we became friends and where you asked me out the first time. It kind of seems like the place that we would celebrate with our friends the start of our married life…at least that is how I was thinking of it but you if want to have it somewhere else we can keep looking." Janet said hoping that Eddie would want it at Sully's.

"Janet, you are the only thing that matters to me and this day is about us so if this is what you want I am absolutely thrilled to have it here. I spent a lot of time coming back in here 'buying the house a round' trying to figure out my feelings for you so to be here celebrating the fact that we found our way to one another…I can't think of a better place." Eddie said grabbing one of Janet's hands in his.

"Eddie, I just want to be with you so all of this is just to let the others in our life to be a part of it. I don't feel like we are the fancy wedding type…I'd marry you today if you wanted to." Janet said with a smile.

Eddie sat there and stared at Janet. He felt exactly the same way. He knew that he wanted to give her the chance to walk down the isle and wear the beautiful dress but he kind of liked the idea of them being married right away. He suddenly had a crazy thought. "Why don't we Janet? Why don't we go somewhere just the two of us and get married. We'll keep our day in August to celebrate with our friends and family and party and all of that but there is nothing that says we can't go somewhere and have our own celebration – just the two of us. What do you think?" Eddie wasn't really sure why he said all these things but he realized in that moment that he really just wanted to married to Janet.

Janet looked at him like he had seriously lost his mind. "Where was all of this coming from?" she thought. But somewhere in the back of her mind she was thinking how romantic would it be to go off some where and get married not letting anyone know except them. They could still have the ceremony where her Grands could be there because they would never forgive her if they couldn't see her get married but really there was nothing from stopping them from having their own personal celebration, right?

Janet stared into Eddie's eyes that just seemed to be on fire with this idea. "If you are serious Eddie, then let's do it. I don't really have much going on today or even tomorrow. I do have to work the next day though at Sully's…what about you?" Janet was growing more excited by the second.

"There isn't anything that Ikey can't take care of on his own. I'll just let Nick know that we're going to go visit your Grands and he wouldn't really question me about it. So we are really doing this?" Eddie said with the biggest smile.

"Yeah, I guess we are, but where?" Janet had no idea where to go next.

"There is this place on the way to see your Grands that I saw. It is by a small lake and really private. I am sure we could find a justice of the peace that could marry us. They have these really beautiful cabins that are on the water. They seem perfect for a wedding and honeymoon." With that last statement, he had the biggest smile.

Janet said, "Well I guess if we are going to go I need to do some shopping and we need to find out who to call that can marry us. We would need a license right?"

"Yeah, but I think that in that part of New Hampshire you only have to wait a day so we could go today and have it ready for tomorrow. I'll make some calls, K?" With that Eddie grabbed his cell phone and started to call all the places he needed to.

Janet walked into their bedroom and her head was spinning. Were they really doing this? This is so crazy, she thought. They never did things so impulsively, but she was so happy and excited that by tomorrow at this time she could really be Mrs. Eddie Latekka. She really liked how that sounds. She began to put some clothes in her bag and pack for the two nights for both her and Eddie.

Everything was set. Eddie managed to talk the justice into performing the small ceremony by the lake near the cabin he had just rented. He couldn't believe it – they were all booked up but just 15 minutes before Eddie called they had a cancellation. He thought this is how it was meant to be…just us. Eddie walked into their bedroom and told Janet the good news. He doubled checked to make sure she had packed his one and only suit. She looked at him and said, "I really need to do some shopping. I don't have a dress that would come close to being ok for this." Eddie looked at her and smiled. "You go and get a dress, I'll finish up here. Just don't take too long because I promised the Justice we would make it to the court house before they closed to get our license squared away." He said.

Janet said, "Ok, I'll be quick…I can't believe we are doing this…I am so happy Eddie, I love you so much." Janet walked up to Eddie and kissed him so passionately.

As they part, Eddie said, "I love you too but let's save some for the honeymoon." He raised his eyebrow and walked in their bathroom.

Janet headed out and headed to the one store that she thought would give her exactly what she needed. There was this small consignment shop that she had seen this dress in. It was in the window for the longest time. It was an antique champagne color and was beautiful in its simplicity. She would drive past this shop and see it in the window and just fell in love with it but could not think of a single reason to buy it until today. She walked in the shop and looked around for a bit and didn't see it. She felt so let down because there was just something about that dress. The saleswoman walked up to her and asked if she needed anything. Janet had just said that she was looking for the dress that had been in the window but that she didn't see it anywhere so it must have been sold already. The saleswoman could see the sadness in Janet's eyes when she said it. The saleswoman said, "could you excuse me just for a second I need to check on something, I'll be right back." Janet said, "sure no problem."

Janet continued to look throughout the shop but nothing came close to that dress. She couldn't help but feel as though this was a sign that maybe they shouldn't be doing this but then the saleswoman returned and brought her out of her thoughts.

"Sorry about that, now you were looking for the dress that was in the window a few months ago. " the saleswoman said.

"Yes, my fiancée and I are getting married the first weekend in August but when we were talking about the plans today we decided to get married tomorrow, just us you know and then celebrate with all our friends and family on our scheduled date. I know it seems a bit impulsive but I just thought that dress would have been perfect. We are getting married by the lake jut outside of Rhode island." Janet explained not sure why.

"Well I think I have the perfect dress for you. Come with me." The sales woman smiled and Janet followed her to a dressing room that the saleswoman had set up obviously while she was away. When Janet stepped into the room, she saw the dress that she wanted hanging on the rack in the dressing room. Janet gasped. "That is the dress!" Janet had tears in her eyes.

The sales woman said, "I suspected this was the dress you were referring to. I had it in the back since I was switching the dresses in the window. It is a very special dress, let's try it on. I think it will look beautiful on you."

The saleswoman helped Janet get into the dress. Surprisingly it fit Janet perfectly, as if it were made just for her. It had three quarter length sleeves that were flowing not fitted. It had a v neck and hugged Janet's curves amazingly. It was a heavier material with a hint of floral in the pattern that was just a bit darker champagne colored than the dress. It came to Janet's mid calf area in the front and was a bit longer in the back. It was just beautiful. She felt like someone who existed from another era. It was so unique and special she knew right then that this dress would be perfect for her wedding with Eddie. "I'll take it." Janet said with a huge smile.

"Wait one more thing that would be perfect." The saleswoman said leaving for a brief moment and returning with the most beautiful necklace and matching bracelet. It was a combination of pearls and diamond like stones. It was the perfect accent to the dress, as if they all came together.

The saleswoman said, "The woman that brought this dress to my shop also brought this jewelry with it. She instructed me to give the woman who bought this dress these jewels to accompany it. She wasn't selling the jewels they were to go along with the dress when the right person came in to buy it. I think that she would be smiling right now if she could see you in her dress and would definitely want you to have these." Janet just stood there in shock. It was as though this dress had a story and she was now somehow a part of it. She was not a big believer in fate but in her recent months of meeting Dwayne and Eddie coming back into her life she was starting to feel as though her life had a purpose and all the parts of it were coming together just as they were always meant to. Even though her and Eddie decided to do this on a spur of the moment it somehow felt planned by something greater than themselves now and she knew beyond certainty that they were doing the right thing.

Janet said, "I can not tell you how much this means to me. When you see this woman again, please tell her how much I love this dress and the jewelry and I will wear these with honor. This dress will always be very special to me just as I suspect it was to the woman who brought it to you."

The saleswoman just smiled and "I will my dear. Now let's get you out of here so you can get to New Hampshire."

Janet walked out of the store with the dress, jewelry and shoes. She actually found a pair just as she was walking to the register that would go perfectly with the dress. She couldn't believe that she had gotten so lucky. She couldn't wait to see the look on Eddie's face when he saw her in this dress. She knew that the next day would end of being one of the most special of her life.

Janet returned home and Eddie was sitting on the couch watching TV. She had put the dress in a garment bag and placed it in the back of Eddie's truck so he wouldn't see it. She walked into the living room and went over to sit by him on the couch.

"Hey, your back already?" Eddie said smiling thinking that she would be gone for most of the day.

"Yep, I found exactly what I was looking for so I am already to go if you are." Janet said looking to him to see if he had changed his mind.

"Well then, let's go!" Eddie practically leaped off the couch. He seemed to have this permanent grin on his face. Eddie could not have been happier at that very moment. There was something about the two of them having this moment that he absolutely loved. He knew that Janet really wanted the wedding with the white dress and the bridesmaids and all that stuff but really all Eddie wanted was Janet to be his wife.

The two had been on the road for a few hours and arrived in the small town in New Hampshire. They went directly to the courthouse to meet with the Justice and he was somewhat surprised on how quickly they had arrived. After spending the approximate 30 minutes with the couple filling out all the paperwork and getting all the legalities in order the Justice could see the love between these two people and could understand a bit more what was going on here. This type of love isn't often see so the Justice felt so privileged to be a part of it all. He agreed to come to their cabin and they would have the ceremony at sunset by the lake behind their cabin. It would be a simple ceremony with only the three of them in attendance.

As soon as all the paperwork was processed, Eddie and Janet thanked the Justice and headed to their cabin for the night. They were pretty tired when they arrived as it had been a busy day. They got to their cabin and walked through the door to see why this resort had always been booked. The cabin's were spectacular. The wall that faced the lake was covered from top to bottom with windows so you could see the sunrise and set. It had a fireplace with a cobblestone chimney that went from the floor to the ceiling. The furniture was a combination of leather and suede material. There were two couches, a love seat and three big oversized chairs scattered through out the great room. It had a small kitchen area with every appliance necessary and a loft with the bedroom in it. The master bathroom was on the first floor and had the largest whirlpool tub Janet had ever seen. This wasn't the typical "cabin" that they were used to. Eddie was so happy that everything was turning out so nicely. He knew the moment they arrived in the town that they were doing the right thing. It was just a perfect location and one he thought they could return to for their anniversaries…the one that only they would remember and know existed.

Janet walked around looking at everything and stopped briefly to look at Eddie. "This is absolutely perfect Eddie. I can't believe that we will be husband and wife by this time tomorrow. I want to say something to you." Janet paused for a second and Eddie looked at her a bit concerned.

"Eddie I have never been as happy as I am right this moment and I promise you that I will be there for you for the remainder of our lives together. I can't think of anything that is more perfect than being here with you and tomorrow before you and God alone we will promise to be there for each other. It is just the way I want it to be." Janet said with tears shining in her eyes.

Eddie walked over to her and put his arms around her. Eddie had so much he wanted to say in that moment but all he wanted to do was to be with Janet. He decided he would tell her everything he was feeling tomorrow during there ceremony but tonight he just wanted to hold her close to him and enjoy the fact that they were together. "I love you so much Janet." It was the only words that Eddie spoke before he lead Janet to the bedroom in the loft and they spent the rest of the night holding each other close, kissing with the most intensity of their relationship and enjoying the fact that they would no longer be Eddie Latekka and Janet Meadows after tomorrow. They would finally be the family that they always wanted to be and be a part of. After tonight, they would face the world together as husband and wife and no matter what obstacles came their way they would have each other to face them together. All of the past mistakes, heartache and pain that they each had faced were just memories from their past. The future was going to be filled with love, friends, fun and family, but tomorrow will be just from them. Tomorrow is the wedding day of the bartender from The Ridge and the football hero who decided that the most noteworthy thing each had accomplished in their lives had nothing to do with making the best play in Knight's Ridge history or serving the best drinks in town, it was simply to find each other.


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29:

The sun arose over the beautiful lake and Janet was standing in the great room looking out over the water taking in the scene. She was so incredibly happy that she was not able to sleep for another minute. Her wedding day had come and she could wait to put on her gorgeous antique dress and stand before Eddie and God and say her vows. Although she had no planned for this day she could not imagine it any other way now.

Suddenly Janet felt arms wrap around her waist and she smiled. Eddie had come up behind her and was presently nibbling on her neck and ear lobes. She closed her eyes and took in the feeling of being loved so much. He turned her around slowly and planted one hell of a kiss on her lips. As they stood there in the light of the morning sun reflecting off the lake indulging in one heck of a make out session neither one of them could think of a single place they would rather be.

After several minutes, they decided breathing would be helpful so they reluctantly pulled apart. Eddie smiled down at Janet in the warmest possible way. Janet looked up at him and took her hand and gently rubbed it across his head into his hair and down around his cheek. It was such an intimate moment between them, nothing needed to be said.

Eddie broke the silence first, and said, "Good morning babe."

Janet said, "Good morning to you. We are getting married today. Can you believe we actually pulled this off?"

"Absolutely…because it was meant to happen that why every thing worked out. So what do you want to do today?" Eddie asked.

"Well I was thinking that maybe we could go into town and have breakfast and just see the sights a bit." Janet said.

"The Justice will be here about 5:45 because the sunset is scheduled to be around 6:15pm or so…he thought in case of a change he would be here. So we have the day to do what we want. Breakfast sounds great I am starving." Eddie said lifting his eyebrow and a wink.

"You are always starving." Janet said with a laugh

"I can't help that being with you gives me one heck of an appetite" Eddie chuckled

With that the two turned around and headed upstairs to get dressed for the day. They found this cute little restaurant that served the most amazing pancakes Janet and Eddie had ever tasted. After eating way more than he should have he finally stopped. Janet didn't indulge as much as she knew that she wanted her dress to fit as perfectly as it had in the shop yesterday. She looked around the streets of the town as they sat at their window seat and tried to decide where to start. There appeared to be a main street so she thought that would be a great place to walk around a bit. Eddie paid the bill and they set out to see the sights of the town.

A few hours later, they came across this little wood shop store that sold lots of little things and some furniture made from the wood found in the area. Janet saw this wooden box that sort of resembled a treasure chest that she thought would be a nice touch to the living room to put little things in, or maybe she could put her jewelry in it. Eddie was walking around the store and came upon a grandfather clock. It was absolutely beautiful and there was a place that you could engrave a message. He thought was a perfect gift for his bride to have sent to the house. He quietly snuck off and found the owner of the store and explained what he wanted the clock to say and gave him the address of their home in the Ridge so it could be sent there as he wanted it to be a surprise. The owner was thrilled at the thoughtfulness of Eddie and saw Janet looking at the treasure box. He came up and pretended like he hadn't just spoken to Eddie minutes before and introduced himself as the owner of the shop.

"Hi folks! My name is Gab and this is my shop. What brings you two to these parts?" he asked with a smile.

"Hi Gab, I'm Eddie and this is Janet. We are actually getting married later on today. We came in just looking around and enjoying this amazing little town. Our ceremony is at sunset right on the lake." Eddie said with such pride.

"Well that sounds real nice. You must be staying at the resort with the cabins right?" Gab asked

"Yeah, they are beautiful." Janet said

"Well if you need anything let me know. I see you eyeing up that box there, how about that be my wedding gift to the two of you. Everyone needs a place for the things they love the most right." Gab said with a smile. He knew she really wanted it and probably wouldn't ask but Eddie had spent a lot on the clock so Gab thought it was fair.

"Oh no, I couldn't take this…that is very generous but…" Janet said stumbling a bit

"Non-sense, it is my gift to you. Congratulations to you both. " Gab said as he placed the box back in Janet's hands and walked away.

Eddie looked at Janet clearly conflicted on what to do and said, "Janet he wanted to give this to you. Just take it as a remembrance of our time here. It's our wedding day, people like to do nice things on their wedding day, Ok?" Eddie wasn't going to let her know that he had just spent a great deal of money on that clock and knew exactly why Gab gave that treasure box to her.

"Ok, I guess it would be ok. It is beautiful isn't it." Janet said admiring it once again.

"Yeah, beautiful…" Eddie said looking purely at Janet

They walked around a bit more and decided to head back to the cabin and get ready. Janet had just gotten out of the shower and was drying her hair. She was looking at herself in the mirror and just thinking about what was about to happen. The day had come that she would be Mrs. Edward Latekka. She wanted to call her Grands but thought that they would be upset if they missed her wedding so she decided the one in August would be ok to wait for. It would be a bit more traditional which would make them happy.

She applied her makeup and decided on just having her hair somewhat wild and curly just as Eddie liked it. She didn't get a bunch of flowers or anything to hold. She wanted to be just simple. She began to put the dress on, then the jewelry and then the shoes. She looked at herself in the mirror and just stood there. For the first time in her life she felt beautiful. She hardly recognized herself. She would have started to cry but didn't want to ruin her makeup so she began to walk away and look out the window of the loft. Eddie agreed to go to the downstairs bathroom to get ready and wait for the Justice.

Janet seemed so lost in thought that she hadn't even heard the door bell ring. She was staring out the window when she felt the small touch of a hand on her shoulder. She had made Eddie promise not to come up there until it was time to start. She turned around quickly to find her Grands standing there. She couldn't hold back the tears anymore.

"What are you doing here?" Janet said as tears fell from her eyes

"Eddie called us yesterday and told us of his idea. It sounded so amazingly sweet that we couldn't have missed it. He knew deep down you would have wanted us to be here on your actual wedding day. You look so beautiful Janet." Edith had tears of her own falling from her eyes.

"I am so happy that you are here. He is one amazing man isn't he Grandma." Janet said.

"That he is my dear, that he is." Edith said.

"We have one thing that we wanted to give to you. I know that you wish that your parents could have been here to spend this day with you. They loved you so much Janet. There are a few things that I know that your mom wanted you to have." Edith pulled a few things out of her purse. "These were the earrings that your mother wore the day she married your father. She loved him so much and hardly ever took them off. Today she would want you to have them as something old. This was your fathers. We gave it to him the day he graduated from college. (It was a sapphire tie tack.) His favorite team was Michigan State, no one could ever figure out why but he loved that team and so we got him something with Blue the color of his favorite team. He loved it so much and wore it all the time. I bought this small flower to put into your hair as I figured you wouldn't have a veil or anything and I placed the pin in the flower as your something new and something borrowed that is blue." Edith placed the flower that was attached to a clip into Janet's hair. It was just enough to make the large curls really stand out.

Janet just stood there and didn't know what to say. Edith continued, "Janet we are just so happy for you and so happy that we could be here today to share in your day. I know that we can't bring your parents back but I hope that these little things can help you feel closer to them as I am sure they are here in spirit in their own way."

Janet's tears started again and she just hugged her grandmother as tightly as she could. She did feel that they were there standing beside her. Just then the Justice said, "We better get started I can see the sun is beginning to fall."

Eddie and the Justice went outside and got positioned out by the lake. Janet and her Grands came down the stairs and walked out of the back door of the cabin towards Eddie and the Justice. Janet had her grandmother on one side and her grandfather on the other. Each took a hand and the three of them walked hand in hand in hand towards Eddie and the Justice.

Eddie could not believe how beautiful Janet looked. She was absolutely breathtaking in that dress. Tears began to fall from his eyes before he was able to control them. Soon Janet arrived across from Eddie and her grandparents stood behind her. The Justice began the ceremony as Eddie and Janet faced each other as the sun began to make its slow descent to the water.

The ceremony was rather traditional with Janet and Eddie reciting vows that were time honored and traditional. There was no music just the voices of the Justice, Eddie and Janet and the various birds that were lending their voices to the ceremony as well. The rings were exchanged and the prayer was given. As Eddie and Janet looked into each others eyes just as the sunset was nearly complete, the Justice pronounced them husband and wife. Eddie leaned down and gently pressed his lips against Janet's to confirm the union of Edward and Janet Latekka. Janet's Grands were in tears as they watched their granddaughter kiss her husband for the first time and they began to clap as the Justice announced the newly married couple.

Eddie pulled back from Janet and smiled. He said, "I love you Mrs. Latekka."

Janet looked at Eddie with tears in her eyes, and said "I love you too Mr. Latekka."

With that they slowly turned and went to hug Janet's Grands. They all went into the cabin as the sun was finally set and it was rather dark out by the lake without the sun. They decided that they would all go out some where in town to go celebrate their wedding. The Justice had made a suggestion of the nicest place in town and told Eddie that he had let them know that you may be stopping by so they would be able to accommodate them. Eddie shaked the Justice's hand and in moments he was gone.

Eddie turned to the three other members of his family and said, "Well it looks like we have a reservation so lets go eat!" Eddie thought to himself that he had never been this happy before. This would be a moment in his life that he would never forget.

Janet, her Grands and Eddie made their way to the restaurant that the Justice had suggested and there was a small corner table that was in what appeared to be a bowed window setting. It was decorated with flowers and champagne on the table. Apparently the Justice had done a bit more than just make a suggestion. The staff at the restaurant approached the foursome and said, "You must be the Latekka's. Congratulations on your wedding, come your table is all ready. I must say ma'am you are so beautiful" the waiter said with a smile.

Janet just blushed at the comment however Eddie beamed with happiness. He said, "I couldn't agree more. My wife looks stunning tonight." Eddie stopped Janet just then and kissed her properly as a husband should. Everyone eating in the restaurant just began to clap and shout their congratulations to the happy couple.

The four of them sat and ate an amazing meal with lots of complimentary drinks from all over the restaurant and than they brought out this tiny little wedding cake. It looked like a miniature wedding cake along with the tiny little wedding bells on the top. Janet just could not believe that this day had been so perfect with such little planning. This town had really embraced these strangers as if they do this all the time. As she sat there watching Eddie talk with her grands and they all were having such a good time laughing and enjoying each other. It was the first time in a very long time that Janet felt like she was truly part of a family again. She looked up briefly as if to include her parents with the tiniest of smiles. She knew somehow that they were with her on this day and helped to make it so perfect.

Janet's Grands had made reservations at the local hotel as they weren't much for the cabin life and Eddie made sure they got safely in the hotel before returning to his truck and his wife. It was the first time that they had been alone together since the wedding began. Janet turned to look at Eddie and said, "Thank you Eddie. I can't believe you were able to get my Grands here for this. I know that you wanted it to be just us but them being here was really important to me. I love you so much for all of this." Janet said emotionally.

Eddie just looked back at Janet, "I love you too Janet and there is nothing that I wouldn't do for you. I know that deep down you would want them there for our actual wedding. You look absolutely beautiful in that dress. I am so happy that we did this. You are finally my wife!" He leaned and took her hand in his and kissed the top of it.

Janet could not wait another minute, "I think it is time for us to go back to our cabin and enjoy that whirlpool tub don't you." Janet looked into his eyes and winked.

Eddie just smiled and said, "Oh goodie now the fun begins!"

With that Mr. and Mrs. Latekka headed back to the cabin to enjoy themselves on their honeymoon. Eddie was thankful that he didn't have to be in to work the next day until later in the afternoon because he wasn't planning on getting much sleep that night.

Janet slipped out of her dress and hung it back up. It almost made her sad that she wouldn't be able to wear it again because she really loved that dress. She began to fill the tub with water, got the whirlpool started and began to light candles. She went into the kitchen and got a bottle of wine and two glasses and put them on the edge of the tub. The tub took up the entire corner of the bathroom so it had lots of ledge space for candles and wine. Janet wanted everything to be perfect.

Eddie came into the bathroom in just his boxers and stood there while Janet continued to light candles and get ready to go in. She was standing there in only her bra and panties and stopped briefly from lighting the candles to find Eddie looking at her. She had never felt so loved in her life than she had that day. She put the lighter down and reached behind her back, unhooked her bra and let it fall to the floor. The panties hit the floor moments later. For the first time Janet stood in the candle light of the bathroom completely naked in front of Eddie with no shame and no attempts at covering herself in any way. She walked towards him at that point and Eddie seemed to be frozen not being able to do anything. Before he knew what was happening she was removing his boxers herself and they joined her clothing on the floor. Janet raised her arms around his neck and pulled him down to kiss her. They kissed for several minutes when Janet pulled away and took his hand. Together they walked to the tub and both got in. It was a huge whirlpool so Eddie had plenty of leg room which he appreciated very much. He sat down first and Janet stepped in just after him. She stood in the water and stared at Eddie as he took his seat. Eddie had never really witnessed Janet's behavior before and he seemed to be a stunned by it, but in a very good way.

Janet waited for him to get comfortable and then she walked over to him and sat on his lap facing him. She looked at him with so much love because that is how she felt. They began to kiss and touch each other. Eddie wrapped his arms around her and they spent the next several hours just touching and caressing each other. The closeness that they were experiencing in those hours were so intense. They decided finally that they would need to leave the water so they got out of the tub and decided to go to the great room and spend the rest of the evening in front of the fire place instead of the loft. There was something so pure about their union that neither of them could explain it or wanted it to end. They spent the entire night in each other's arms, making love and lavishing each other with tendering embraces and loving caresses and a bond that would never ever be broken after this night. There was not much talking involved just a calm silence of a love that was determined to survive through all the tests it was given, a first love that was meant to be a forever love.

As the sun arose over the lake, Eddie and Janet had eventually fallen asleep in the early hours of morning. They were laying on blankets and pillows in front of the fire place wrapped in each others arms. The sun was powerful and Janet was the first to realize it. She blinked a few times not knowing what time it actually was. She understood why the bedroom was in the loft. It took several hours for the sun to reach a spot where it would shine into the loft windows.

She began to move around and sat up briefly. She turned just slightly to find Eddie completely asleep beside her with the most peaceful look on his face. She saw the ring on his finger just then and smiled. She couldn't believe that they were actually married. She looked at the ring on her finger and the added band that had gone with the set that she had looked at so long ago back when her life seemed like such a mess. She never would have thought in that moment that this would be how everything would have turned out. Grands was right, true love always finds its way home and she knew that Eddie was her home now.

Eddie moved slightly and noticed that he was alone. He sprang up quickly looking around to find that Janet was still there just sitting up. He grabbed her lightly around her waist and brought her back down to their little sleeping nest and said, "you aren't going anywhere Mrs. Latekka and it is was to early to be thinking about it."

Janet just chuckled and said, "I wouldn't dream of going anywhere but that sun is pretty bright."

"If you close your eyes it won't be." Eddie said with his eyes still closed.

With that Janet closed her eyes and the newly weds promptly fell back asleep wrapped in each others arms with the blanket over their heads. That is where they remained until nearly the middle of the afternoon.


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

Eddie and Janet awoke several hours later in the early afternoon. Eddie could not believe how long they actually slept. He had promised Nick that he would be back in the afternoon to help out with a bid on a potential window project. Since no one really knew why they had gone on this impromptu trip he didn't think Nick would be that understanding of his lack of ability to keep his word.

Eddie sat up and looked around a bit. The sun was very bright at this time in the living room area. He knew he had slept a lot longer than he had planned. He got up and went to find his cell phone.

"hey Nicky it's me…listen it turns out I am not going to make it back quite when I had planned…can you cover the bid today on your own?"

"Where the hell are you Eddie? You said you would be in today. Yeah I can cover it but you need to start focusing on this place a little more…I have been covering for you a lot and now that you and Janet are solid I am not going to keep doing it on my own." Nick said very frustrated.

"I know Nicky…I promise you that this will be the last time. We just slept a bit longer then we expected to today. I'll explain everything when I get in. I will head into BFW today when I get back. Maybe you can push back the appointment a couple of hours." Eddie said hoping that Nick was right.

"Don't worry about it Eddie I got it covered for today but seriously you have got to start pulling your weight around here. I know that your wedding is coming up and you'll need time off for that too so at least give me a couple of months of pretending like you own the place." Nick said somewhat jokingly.

"I get it Nicky…don't worry you will have my full attention when we get back." Eddie said smiling knowing that Nick wasn't really that upset.

"Don't worry about making it in today…just be here tomorrow sometime before noon ok?" Nick said with a smile.

"Thanks Nick – I'll be there." Eddie shut the phone just in time to feel Janet's arms wrap around his waist.

"Good morning" Janet said with a smile "everything ok at work?"

"Yep Nick's got it covered." Eddie said turning around still in her embrace.

"Good because I don't want to have to rush back." Janet said now smiling up at her husband.

"No rushing necessary." Eddie said and he leaned down and kissed his wife.

The two did not make it too far as they returned to the living room floor and got caught up in each other once again.

A few hours later, Janet and Eddie were on the road on their way back to the Ridge. They had made love one more time before getting their stuff packed up and ready for their return home as husband and wife. As they sat in the truck they began to talk about how they would tell everyone about their wedding. Janet was a little concerned that Hannah would be upset with her that she didn't have Hannah a part of her actual ceremony but they both decided that their friends would understand and that they would go ahead and have another ceremony in August as they had planned so everyone would be to celebrate with them.

Eddie was looking at Janet as they talked about the future ceremony and how that was going to work when he glanced just slightly over her shoulder to see this tow truck speeding towards them. They were on the highway back to the Ridge but there were several streets that crossed over the highway so that traffic had stop signs to deal with in order to cross over the highway. In the split second Eddie saw that tow truck he realized that the truck either hadn't seen that stop sign or didn't care but just as soon as Eddie saw it coming towards them it hit the passenger side door of the truck. It spun the truck around and pushed it across the lanes and onto the side of road in which it started to roll down the embankment. It came to a stop on its wheels upright at the bottom but the damage was done.

Eddie was conscious and looked over at Janet. She was not. There was blood everywhere and he had no idea if she was still alive. He felt like screaming but kept as cool as he could.

"JANET! JANET! TALK TO ME PLEASE!" Eddie shouted but got no response.

He reached into his pocket and pushed 911 into his cell phone. Soon the police, fire trucks and an ambulance were on the scene. Janet had not regained consciousness but Eddie could feel she had a pulse, it was faint but it was there.

The EMT's came up to the truck and Eddie was walking around frantically trying to understand what had happened. The driver of the tow truck was in the ambulance being treated for minor injuries and reported to the police that he hadn't seen the stop sign and when he did he tried to slow down but could not stop the truck any sooner. He felt awful when he realized what he had caused. He sat in the ambulance and walked Eddie pace back and forth waiting for the fire department and EMT's trying to get Janet out of the truck. They both had their seat belts on but her door was badly dented from the impact and because of the rolling they could not get the door open…they had to utilize the jaws of life to get her out. Eddie didn't know what to do so he called the one person that would know exactly what to do.

"Nicky!" Eddie said clearly upset

"What is going on Eddie? What's wrong?" Nick could hear the terror in Eddie's voice.

"Janet and I were in an accident and she isn't conscious Nicky…what am I going to go Nick? She can't die when I just made her my wife?" Eddie said ranting

Nick sat there and thought for a second "made her my wife" what was he talking about. "Eddie did you two get married while you were away?" Nick asked

"Yeah, I was going to tell you when we got back. We decided at the spur of a moment to do it a few days ago. I can't loose her now Nicky…" Eddie's tears began to fall uncontrollably.

"Ok Eddie just hang on buddy I am on my way. Where are they going to take her?" Nick said matter of factly.

"The EMT's said that they will have to take her to Boston General due to her injuries…its bad Nicky." Eddie said so quietly

"Ok, I will get Hannah because I am sure that Janet will want to talk to her when she wakes up and we'll be on our way as soon as we can. Don't worry buddy she is a fighter…she'll be ok." Nick said hoping that he sounded convincing.

"Ok Nicky, I'll see you there then." Eddie said shutting his phone just as an EMT approached him

"Mr. Latekka lets get you in the ambulance and check you out. You could be in shock and injured and not feeling it right now." He said trying to move Eddie up the embankment towards the ambulance.

"NO I have to stay here with my wife. I'm fine just a few cuts that's all." Eddie said with his eyes totally focused on Janet

"Sir, listen, she is being taken care of by the best but we need to take a look at you. Please Mr. Latekka there is nothing you can do for her right now." The EMT knew that it would be difficult to separate him from his wife but was concerned he may internal injuries that he wasn't feeling because of the adrenaline.

"Ok" was all Eddie said complying with the EMT

The fire fighters and emergency personnel were able to finally get Janet out of the truck and had already alerted the med flight helicopter that she would need to be flown to Boston General. She wasn't responding at all to any of the workers and though she had a fairly strong pulse they knew something was very wrong.

The helicopter arrived and Janet's unconscious body was loaded in to the helicopter along with the highly trained EMT's and Eddie, her husband. He would need to be there to consent to further medical treatment in order to save her life.

They arrived at Boston General about 10 minutes later and everyone was running into the hospital from the med flight heli-pad. The doctors quickly examined Janet and tried to understand the extend of her injuries and why she wasn't responding and still unconscious. Eddie was ushered to the waiting room until the Doctor could assess Janet's condition and make some decisions as to what needed to be done.

As Eddie sat there in the waiting room, his head in his hands and tears on his face he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Nick and Hannah. They had arrived in the emergency room area and quickly found Eddie. Eddie looked up with tears in his eyes and when he saw Nick they began to free fall.

"I can't lose her Nicky…I just can't lose her." Eddie kept repeating the statement over and over.

"It's ok Eddie we are here…she will be just fine." Nick said but in his heart he knew that what he was saying may not be the truth.

Hannah stood there in disbelief. She did not have much time to process what had happened. Nick called her and told her that Janet had been in a serious car accident and was unconscious. She just dropped everything and grabbed her purse and went with Nick to Boston. They must have sped the entire way to the hospital because they arrived very shortly after Eddie had.

Nick and Eddie embraced for what seemed like hours but it was just merely minutes. Just then the doctor called out for Eddie Latekka.

Eddie turned around and said, "I'm Eddie Latekka…how is my wife?"

"Mr. Latekka Janet has sustained major internal injuries. Her spleen appears to have sustained a great deal of damage. It is lacerated and she is bleeding internally. She has several broken ribs and her right lung is collapsed. She will need surgery to reinflate her lung and repair her spleen. She is still unconscious and we are not certain as to why at this time. She is in critical condition but surprisingly your baby is fine. It's heart rate is strong and seemed to have survived the impact but the next few days will really tell us if the fetus will be able to make it or not." The doctor said.

Eddie stood there and tried to register everything that the doctor had just said. "did he just say baby?" Eddie thought

"Did you just say baby?" Eddie repeated his thought out loud.

Nick and Hannah looked up and at each other as surprised by the statement as Eddie was to say it.

"Yes, your wife was about 6 – 7 weeks pregnant." The doctor looked at Eddie's face and realized that they may not have known about the pregnancy yet.

"Due to the fact that the pregnancy is in the early stages and the fetus is so tiny, the baby was very much protected by Janet and it appears that she sustained all the impact and was able to keep the baby safe inside of her. Did you two not know of the pregnancy?" The doctor asked.

"No, we didn't." Eddie said distanctly.

Eddie began to think back 6 – 7 weeks. They had spent a great deal of time with each other over the last weeks since they decided to give their relationship another chance. He remembered back to the night in which he was so angry at Janet and his feelings came out from the break up and her moving away and her relationship with Dwayne, all of it. They spent that night together after they had talked it out making love over and over again realizing that they were truly together and nothing was ever going to break them apart again. It was that night that they conceived their child. It was that night that they truly gave themselves to each other in so many more ways then they even knew.

The doctor saw that Eddie was trying to process all of this. "Mr. Latekka, we will do everything in our power to sanight in which he was so angry at Janet and his feelings came out from the break up and her moving away and her relationship with Dwayne, all of it. They spent that night together after they had talked it out making love over and over again realizing that they were truly together and nothing was ever going to break them apart again. It was that night that they conceived their child. It was that night that they truly gave themselves to each other in so many more ways then they even knew.

The doctor saw that Eddie was trying to process all of this. "Mr. Latekka, we will do everything in our power to save your child and your wife. The next 72 hours are critical and if they can survive those 72 hours than they should both be just fine."

Eddie was still trying to process all of what the doctor said. "I could lose my entire family in the next 72 hours or maybe just my baby" Eddie's thoughts were rapidly spinning in his mind.

Eddie signed all the papers that needed to be signed in order for Janet to have surgery and returned to the waiting area and to Nick and Hannah.

No one spoke for a few minutes but then Eddie said quietly, "My child…she is pregnant with my baby…I can't lose my family before I even knew I had one."

This time it was Hannah to speak. "Eddie, Janet is the strongest person that I knew and somewhere in her body she will protect that baby and they will both be just fine." Hannah placed her hand on Eddie's shoulder trying to reassure him.

"She doesn't even know that the baby is there…she would have told me." Eddie said almost in a whisper.

"Well maybe not but mother's just know on some level and she will fight for them both." Hannah said with tears in her eyes. She had always thought about both her and Janet having kids and having them play together. It would be so unfair if they never got the chance.

"I hope that you are right Hannah because I don't know what I will do if I lose either one of them." Eddie said getting up and walking to the window.

Nick followed. "Eddie, I know that this is rough but we are here for you. Is there anyone else you want me to call…her grandparent's maybe?" Nick asked.

"No don't call them just yet. I want to be able to tell them that she is ok before I call." Eddie said.

"Ok" Nick said.

"I guess all we can do is just wait…and pray" Eddie said as he stared out the window.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31:

It had been hours since Eddie, Nick and Hannah had arrived in the emergency room and learned that not only was Janet in critical condition but she was carrying their child. A child that neither one of them knew even existed until this horrific accident brought it to light. Eddie spent most of time pacing around the waiting room or sitting in the chair trying to understand why this was happening. He was finally FINALLY happy and even expecting their first child. This should be the happiest time in his life however now he didn't even know if he would ever get a chance to see his first child or his wife alive again. Janet had been in surgery for hours and the doctor had not returned yet with any information.

"What is going on? Why haven't they come out to talk to me? She has to be out of surgery by now? What if something went wrong? Is he just waiting to tell me that my entire family is gone?" Eddie's thoughts were running wild.

Hannah was staring out the window and thinking thoughts of her own. "Why have they not come out to talk to Eddie? She can't die. She can't die not knowing she is pregnant. She can't die not knowing her own child. She can't die…she's my best friend." Hannah had tears streaming down her face at this point.

Nick was watching both Eddie and Hannah. He could not believe that they were all here for this reason. He can not remember a time in Eddie's life where he was so happy than when he found Janet again and they finally committed to each other whole heartedly. He thought, "Eddie can't lose her now…not after losing her for a year when they broke up. What am I going to do to help him now? What if he loses his child? No none of these things are going to happen. Janet is a fighter and she'll do whatever it takes to stay alive I know she will."

The doctor walked out the doors and called for Eddie. Eddie rushed over to him to find out what was happening with Janet and their baby.

"Mr. Latekka, your wife is out of surgery and is in recovery. She had a laceration in her spleen that we have repaired. She has lost a lot of blood but the transfusion seems to have been successful so both her and your baby are stable for the time being. She will be sore for a while because of the broken ribs and we were able to inflate the lung and it appears to be working on its own now. As I said earlier these next 72 hours are crucial. If she and the baby can make it through the next few days there is a good chance that they will survive. The baby's heart rate is being monitored and has remained fairly stable throughout the surgery, but we aren't out of the woods yet. She should be starting to come out of the anesthesia in a few hours."

"Thank you doctor. Can I see her?" Eddie said ready to run back there even if he said no.

"When she wakes up we will come back and get you. Just hang tight for a little while longer ok?" The doctor said.

Eddie had no choice. "Ok, I'll be right here."

Eddie had a new batch of tears roll down his face. There was something about what the doctor said that worried him. He just had this feeling that something was going to go terribly wrong. He decided that he could not avoid it much longer. It was time to call Janet's grandparents.

"Hello?" Edith answered the phone practically on the first ring.

"Hey Edith" Eddie said trying to sound somewhat ok.

"Eddie, what's wrong? Is Janet ok?" Edith said sensing something in Eddie's voice that something was definitely wrong.

"Yeah, Grands, we were hit by a tow truck on our way home from New Hampshire. Janet just got out of surgery. She had a laceration in her spleen which they were able to fix and her lung collapsed but they were able to fix that too…she also has several broken ribs which will just have to heal on their own…" Eddie paused

"Eddie what else…just tell me son what is wrong with my Janet?" Edith became very upset

"Janet is 6 – 7 weeks pregnant. Our baby is ok for now but the doctors say that the next 72 hours…" Eddie couldn't continue he just burst into tears.

Hannah grabbed the phone and continued to talk with Edith. "Hey Edith, it's Hannah. The doctor said that the baby is stable for now but the next 72 hours will determine if the baby will survive. The accident was very traumatic and could potentially cause a miscarriage but right now the baby is being monitored and is stable."

Edith just sat there not saying anything. She didn't know what to say. She could not even think about losing her Janet but her great grandbaby…that was just too much. Suddenly she spoke, "Hannah what hospital are you at? We are going to come right now. When my grand daughter wakes up I am going to be there." She said it so matter of factly Hannah was taking off guard.

"Um we are at Boston General but it is late and you shouldn't be driving…" that is all Hannah got out before Edith hung up the phone.

"Thanks Hannah. I just couldn't say it." Eddie said breaking the silence.

"Don't worry about it Eddie. They are going to be just fine. We will be here for you – whatever you need ok?" Hannah said placing her hand on his shoulder reassuringly.

"Thanks you guys. It means a lot to me and it will to Janet that you came and stayed with me. I don't know if I can do this alone." Eddie said staring at his hands.

"You won't have to find out buddy." Nick said sitting next to Eddie in the chair.

"Janet's grandparents are their way. Edith said she wanted to be here when Janet woke up." Hannah said.

"Yeah, I figured. She is just as stubborn as Janet." Eddie chuckled a bit.

"So I guess we are back to waiting. Do you want something to eat or some coffee or something?" Nick asked.

"No I am ok. I just want to see Janet" Eddie said distantly.

A little over an hour later Janet's grandparents came through the emergency room doors. Edith looked like she was on fire walking around quickly looking for Eddie. Eddie saw her and got up. Edith quickly made her way over to Eddie and they embraced.

"have you heard anything? Is she awake?" Edith said almost out of breath.

"No and I am getting worried. The doctor said I could go back there and see her when she woke up and that was almost two hours ago. Something's wrong I just know it." Eddie said honestly.

"Well we will just go and ask." Edith said strolling up to the counter and inquired about Janet Latekka.

Hannah sat there and thought "that just sounds weird Janet Latekka. I can't believe they went off and got married. She definitely has some explaining to do when she wakes up."

The nurse at the counter told Edith to wait a minute and disappeared back behind the door. Moments later the doctor was once again in the waiting room.

"These are Janet's grandparents." Eddie said to the doctor.

"Hi, I wish this were under better circumstances. I am sure that Eddie has filled you in on what has been happening up until this point." Edith nodded

"Ok so I just went and checked on Mrs. Latekka and it appears that she has slipped into a coma. We are not certain as to why. Her vitals are all stable and so are the baby's but she is not conscious. This sometimes happens. It could be for a short time or it could last a longer time. We just don't know right now what the cause it. She does not have any head trauma due to the air bags in Mr. Latekka's truck and all her other test results are negative so it must have to do with her body and the trauma it sustained in the crash. We will just have to wait and see." The doctor said.

Eddie began to tear up once again, "Can I see her please?"

"Yes, I'll take you back there. Only one person at a time can go visit her and for now only family." The doctor said.

"These are her family doctor." Eddie said emphatically

"Ok well let's just start with you then. She should be able to hear everything you say so just talk to her as you would normally. In these situations that connection definitely helps." The doctor said.

As Eddie walked away from his family and friends, he couldn't help but wonder what she would look like. Would she be cold? Would he be able to get through to her and bring her back to him? He knew in his heart that something was not right. They reached her room and she was very pale and covered with scratches and bandages. She looked so lifeless but as he walked in her room he heard two distinct heart beats. One that was slow and steady and one that was very fast. He walked up to her bed and immediately grabbed her hand and held it in his. It was warm but still. He began to tell her how he felt.

"Janet I hope that you can hear me. We were in an accident and you were hurt. But you are going to be ok. You have to be ok. I love you so much and I can't live my life without you. You have to come back to me babe. You have to come back to our baby. Yeah, we are going to have a baby. You are pregnant and the baby is doing good. He or She is a fighter just like you and hanging in there so you have to too. Nick and Hannah are here and so are your grandparents. We all love you Janet and we want you back. So please Janet if you can hear me, please fight babe. Fight to come back here and be with us. Fight for our baby. We have fought so hard to be together you can't give up now. Ok, I will be right here waiting for you when you wake up so please Janet please just wake up for me, I love you so much." Eddie laid his head down on top of her hand and that is where he stayed for the next few hours.


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32:

Eddie awoke a few hours later still holding Janet's still hand. He didn't realize that he was as tired as he was. His emotions had been all over the place it seemed the last 24 hours. Her condition seemed the same as it did when he went to sleep. The heart monitored for both his wife and child were beating steadily. He looked at Janet as if willing her to open her eyes but she didn't. He placed his hand on her stomach hoping to let his unborn child struggling for life have all of his strength and to let him or her know just how much he loved and wanted his baby to survive. Tears once again fell from his eyes. He had never openly cried as much as he had these last 24 hours. The thought of losing either his wife or his baby was unbearable but the possibly of losing them both – that he could not live through. Just then he heard someone behind him.

"I'm sorry honey I didn't mean to scare you." Edith placed her hand on his shoulder.

"No Edith you didn't scare me. I was just…." Eddie just didn't know how to describe how he was feeling

"I know you don't have to explain it to me. My Janet is a fighter Eddie. She won't let anything happen to that tiny little baby growing inside of her. That much I am sure." Edith looked at Eddie and smiled a bit

"That's just it, she doesn't know that she is pregnant. She would have told me if she had." Eddie looked at Edith and replied almost desperately.

"Eddie, she may not have learned it before this accident I truly believe where ever she is right now she is there to somehow protect this tiny baby and keep him or her safe until they are sure to make it through. A mother's love is instant Eddie whether they know it or not. It is how we are built." Edith said with a reassuring smile.

"So is a father's…" Eddie turned back towards Janet and once again placed his hand on her stomach. Eddie knew from the moment the doctor told him that Janet was carrying their child that he fell in love. This bond that he felt when he was near Janet was something that he could not explain. The feeling he had in the waiting room when he knew something was so terribly wrong went away the moment he stepped in that room and sat with Janet. She hadn't opened her eyes or squeezed his hand but there was something about being with her that made him feel that everything would be ok.

"Do you want to sit with her a bit?" Eddie offered really not wanting to leave her side but knowing that Edith probably wanted some time with her granddaughter as well.

"If you don't mind, Eddie. You should probably go get something to eat sweetie. You getting sick isn't going to help them when she wakes up." Edith said rather matter of factly.

"Yeah I suppose your right. Are Hannah and Nick still here?" Eddie asked.

"They are still in the waiting room with grandpa." Edith said looking at Janet now

"Ok then, I'll go get something to eat." With that Eddie left the room

"Hey my sweet granddaughter, It's Grands. I sure wish this hadn't happened to you. You two were so happy when you got married. It really made grandpa and I so happy to see you finally find your true love. Eddie really loves you Janet. He is so upset right now and wants you to wake up but I know that you are sleeping because you need to. I know that you are protecting your child. I know deep down you know they there is a baby in there that is fighting just as hard as you are to stay alive so you sleep as long as you need to but not a moment longer because we all want to see those beautiful blue eyes again. I want to see if my great grandchild will have those same beautiful blue eyes too. So you sleep for now my sweet but when you are ready we will all be waiting for you." Edith said to Janet with tears running down her cheeks holding Janet's hand and rubbing the top of her hand with her thumb. This is where Hannah found Edith a few hours later.

Hannah walked in by Janet for the first time. She was taken aback by how pale Janet was. She had cuts and scrapes all over her face and on her arms and hands, mostly on her right side where the majority of the impact took place from the tow truck. Edith was sitting so peacefully holding Janet's hand and staring at her. Every once in a while she would take her other hand and gently rub Janet's forehead or smooth her hair back. So much love was in that room for Janet. Hannah thought back to the times when Janet would think that she would never find any one who would love her and now there were so many people who loved her. It made her smile briefly.

"Hey Grands, would you mind if I sat with you for a while." Hannah said

"I wouldn't mind at all but I should go use the ladies room so maybe you can keep Janet company for a while." Edith said knowing that Hannah would like to have some time with Janet as well.

"Ok I'll keep your chair nice and warm." Hannah said as she sat down in the very chair that Edith had just gotten up from.

Soon Hannah was alone with Janet and she just looked at Janet's lifeless body hardly believing she was sitting in this chair staring at her best friend fighting for her life.

"Hey sweetie it's Hannah. You know I was going to give you a piece of my mind for running off and getting married with out me but now hardly seems like the right time, but don't you worry because we are going to have a renewal ceremony and celebrate HUGE when you come home. I can't wait to see that gorgeous baby that you have in there. With your beautiful hair and blue eyes and Eddie's – well Eddie's height that kid with be stunning I am sure. I can't believe that the day I find out about your wedding and first child you aren't even conscious to talk about it. I love you Janet you know that. I know that I can be caught up in my drama a lot but you are my best friend and I just don't know what I would do without you and no one else would put up with me like you do so you need to open those eyes and come back to us…to me. I have never seen Eddie so upset in all the years I have known him. He loves you Janet more than I think even you know. He is already talking about the baby and what things he would do in their room – yeah right who knew he even cared about wall paper. He loves you both…we all do so please Janet fight. Fight harder then you ever have and come back to us. We will be here when you wake up." With that Hannah leaned over and kissed Janet's forehead. Hannah just sat in the chair staring at Janet hoping that she would see signs of life some where, a finger to move or her eyelids to move just a millimeter she didn't care but she saw nothing. All she could hear with the sounds of the beating hearts so steady. The nurse walked in to check Janet's vitals.

"Hi, I'm Sally. I just need to check her vitals to see if there are any changes." The nurse said.

"Oh, ok do you need me to leave? Hannah asked.

"Yeah if you could it will only take a few minutes. Oh, could you give this to Mr. Latekka. The paramedics took this off of Janet during the med flight and wanted to make sure he got it." The nurse handed Hannah Janet's wedding set. In all the commotion of the day Eddie hadn't even realized that she didn't have it on her finger.

Hannah said, "sure I can give this to him." With that Hannah returned to the waiting area. She found everyone sitting in chairs near each other talking.

Hannah walked up to Eddie. The nurse wanted me to give this to you. She handed him Janet's ring.

Eddie seemed so taking of guard. He hadn't even realized it wasn't on her finger but somehow it not being there bothered him.

"Why didn't you just tell her to put it back on her finger Hannah?" Eddie said rather angrily

"Oh well I didn't think of it she just handed it to me and I…" Hannah didn't know why Eddie was so angry with her.

Edith spoke quickly. "Eddie, they can't put that on her finger now because of swelling. If her fingers swell than it could hurt her so why don't you just keep it for now and when she wakes up she will want it back ok?" Edith said hoping she made Eddie understand that he wasn't angry with Hannah he was just worried about Janet.

"Ok, I'm sorry Hannah I didn't mean that it's just that this shouldn't be happening. I shouldn't have to sit here and wait to see if my wife lives through the night and I shouldn't have to find out about my baby because my wife needed emergency surgery…none of this should be happening. I just need to get some air." Eddie stormed off.

Nick said, "I'll go after him. He is just upset." He looked at Hannah as tears were streaming down her face.

Eddie ran out of the emergency room doors and ran to this wooded area outside the hospital where there were park benches and a landscaped garden. Nick followed him there.

"Nick this should be me in there. She shouldn't have been the one who was injured. If we would have gotten up earlier we never would have been there. This is my fault. I shouldn't have suggested that we run off and get married." Eddie was upset and beginning to ramble his thoughts together uncontrollably.

"Eddie, this has nothing to do with anything you did or didn't do, it was an accident, a bad accident but an accident plain and simple. They are both going to be ok. The doctor said that the heart beats are stable. I don't know why these things happen but we are here for you and we aren't going anywhere. You aren't going to go through this alone ok. Janet is a strong woman…she married you didn't she." Nick chuckled a bit hoping to lighten up the mood a little for Eddie.

Eddie turned slightly and looked at Nick, "yeah I guess she did." For the time Eddie smiled a bit. He opened his hand and put the ring in between two of his finger tips and stared at the diamonds. He was so hopeful when he bought this ring. He wasn't even back together with Janet at the time he bought it. He knew that if he was patient enough that some day he would be able to give this ring to her. Well he got his wish then and now he hoped that his wish had enough strength to come around one more time. All he could do is pray that one day she would open her eyes and he would be able to place this ring on her finger once again and tell her he loved her again and even hold his baby for the first time. All of these things were things he wanted more than anything in his life, but all he could do was wait and wish once again that his Janet would return to him one more time.


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter 33:

A week had passed since the accident and there was still no change in Janet's condition. With each passing day Eddie became even more distant and began to react negatively to everyone around him. Inside he wanted to believe that she would pull through this but the doctors kept saying that there was no reason for her to be in this coma. They could not explain it and did not know how long she would remain. Her vitals were stable and normal and so were the baby's. The doctors began to do testing on her brain and heart to make sure there wasn't any hidden reason for this coma she was in. Everything was normal they said. In Eddie's mind everything was far from normal.

Eddie was sitting in Janet's room as he had since she arrived. Hannah had taken Janet's grandparents back to their home days earlier and returned to the Ridge so Nick stayed with Eddie. Nick could see Eddie growing more bitter and angry at the situation. He himself wanted to believe that everything would work out but he knew as well as everyone in this situation that if she hadn't regained consciousness within days of this accident the prognosis wasn't good.

"Eddie why don't you head back to the Ridge for the night? I can stay with Janet and you can get a good night's sleep, shower and get some more clothes to bring back. Maybe bring back Janet's favorite jammies or something because she won't have anything to wear home right now. What do you think?" Nick said hoping Eddie would take his advice.

"No Nick I can't just go home. What if she wakes up and I am not here? I have to stay can't you see that?" Eddie said sternly

"Eddie you need your rest. You aren't sleeping, your not eating and you smell, well bad…you aren't going to be able to take care of Janet when she wakes up if you keep this up and is this how you want her to see you when she does?" Nick said just as sternly

Eddie sat there and thought about what Nick said. Maybe he was right. Maybe a few hours away wouldn't hurt. "I am going to call you and you had better call me if ANYTHING happens ok!" Eddie said.

"You will be the first one to know I promise." Nick said "Now get going before the traffic gets bad."

With that Eddie left Janet's room but not before he kissed her and told her he would be back in the morning. As he walked out of the hospital, he informed Janet's floor nurse that he was just going home to get some clothes and would be back in the morning but left all the phone numbers where he could be reached if anything happened.

The drive home seemed to go by without Eddie's knowledge. He took Nick's chick car which he hated but his truck was totaled. Hannah had taken their belongings from his truck back to the Ridge when she returned so their stuff would be safe. Especially Janet's dress. She really loved that dress and luckily nothing happened to it in the crash.

Before Eddie knew it he was pulling into the driveway of their home. He was tired but something felt so wrong being here without her. It was different then when she had left town because he knew she was still out there but now he didn't know if she was ever coming home. He walked through the door and turned the lights on. It was so quiet…to quiet. Everything was as they left it. He walked over to the couch and sat down. He didn't turn the TV on he just sat there half in the dark trying to understand why all of this was happening. He got up and walked into their bedroom. There was Janet's wedding dress in the garment bag hanging in front of their closet. Hannah had obviously taken good care to make sure the dress wasn't wrinkled and was there when Janet returned home.

Eddie decided to go and take a shower. It felt good to stand there under the hot water. Nick was right. He hadn't showered or anything since they left New Hampshire more than 7 days ago and still had the same clothes on. Suddenly as he stood there the tears came fast and heavy. Eddie just couldn't control them any more. He wanted to stay positive but with each passing day it became harder and harder. The looks on the doctors faces, they couldn't even hide their concern. He knew that they thought she would never regain consciousness but they didn't say anything to him. The one thing that kept him going was that heart beat, that tiny fast heart beat that belonged to their baby. Everyday it would get stronger and stronger. It was as if the baby was thriving in Janet's seemingly lifeless body. The doctors monitored the baby very closely and would always report the good news to Eddie everyday. Truth be told it was what got Eddie through the days.

Eddie got out of the shower after his emotionally releasing cry and put his boxers on and climbed into their bed. He was exhausted. As he lay there, he stared at her side and her pillow longing to see her there and wondering would he ever see her there again.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door. Eddie flew out of bed and realized that it was morning. In fact it was 10am and he realized that he literally passed out the night before. Trying to figure out what that noise was he got out of bed and walked towards the door. Yep it was the front door. He slipped on a pair of jeans and went to the door. As he opened it, he was shocked to see what was before him. The grandfather clock he bought Janet as a surprise for their wedding. It was being delivered today. He had forgotten all about that clock in light of all that had been going on.

"Mr. Latekka, we have the grandfather clock that you ordered, where would you like us to put it?" The delivery man asked

Eddie stood there trying to figure out what to say. His brain seemed behind on the events unfolding in front of him.

"I'm sorry you can just put it over here in this corner of the living room. Thanks." Eddie said

"Ok, we'll do." The delivery man said and with the help of his partner they moved the clearly heavy clock to where Eddie pointed out.

Before Eddie knew it, the men were going and there stood the beautiful grandfather clock that he had bought. She really would have loved this clock, he thought.

He walked up to it and there under the very ornate clock was this area where the inscription had been so beautifully carved into the wood just as he had requested. As he read it silently, the tears returned.

"No matter how time passes you will be forever mine" along with their wedding date was the inscription.

Eddie stood and just stared at that clock so intently. It was as if the clock was a sign that things would be ok. That he would get forever with Janet he just had to stay positive and focused. With this renewed sense of hope, he got dressed. He packed a bag of clothes and toiletries and some clothes for Janet too. He was determined that the next time he came home it would be with her.

A few hours later, Eddie was back at Boston General. They had moved Janet to the intensive care unit to monitor her and the baby more closely a few days after their accident. Hannah was sitting in the room with Nick when Eddie arrived.

"Well you look much better. Did you get some sleep?" Nick asked

"Yeah I did. I felt like a slept for 5 minutes but it was much longer than that." Eddie said smiling a bit "Any changes?" he asked

"No, the nurses were in early this morning and checked on both Janet and the baby. They are both holding steady. Good heart rates and breath sounds, whatever that means." Nick said.

Eddie's heart fell just a bit. "Oh well that is good at least. Why don't you two go get something to eat? I'll stay here with Janet and chat for a bit." Eddie said.

"Ok, sounds good. We'll be back in about an hour or so." Hannah said hugging Eddie on the way out.

Another week passed and still no change. Janet's grandparents had returned and were sitting with Eddie in Janet's room. Nick and Hannah had gone back to the Ridge so they could take care of things and would return within the next few days or if Janet woke up.

Eddie and Edith were sitting side by side in silence until Edith spoke. "You know Eddie. I know what you are thinking but I don't want you to give up hope. She is still in there Eddie and I know she will find her way back to us. You just have to have faith, ok" she said as she grabbed for his hand.

"I am trying but the longer this goes on the worse I feel. Why can't she hear us? Why can't she open her eyes? God how I want her to open her eyes." Eddie said so sadly

"There's a plan Eddie. Never doubt that there is a plan." Edith said and the two quickly fell back into silence.

During week three, Eddie noticed that Janet's belly was becoming harder. He would place his hand on her belly everyday to let his baby know that he or she was loved. It was crazy for Eddie to think that even though Janet wasn't conscious this baby was thriving inside of her. The nurses took such great care of making sure that Janet's feeding tube would loaded with vitamins and things that the baby needed. He was even able to see an ultra sound of the baby and see how much it had grown from just this little circle to now being about the size of a peanut maybe even a cashew. He would stare at those pictures for hours. It made him feel a part of his baby's life and as close to Janet as he could be right now.

On Friday evening, Eddie was sitting on Janet's bedside holding her hand, as he often did, it was going on almost a month since the accident. He was starting to worry about what he was going to do. Eventually he would have to return to work and start earning a living. He felt so conflicted because he didn't want to leave her but at some point he knew he needed to. No one knew if she would ever come out of this coma but the doctors said that the baby was doing very well and there was the possibly that the baby would be born before Janet wakes up. That got Eddie thinking about his future and decisions he may have to make. Decisions that no one should have to make.

"Janet if you can hear me please come back to me. We need you. I need you. Please baby just open up those eyes and show me those beautiful baby blue eyes. I miss those eyes and your smile. I miss you." Eddie said tearing up a bit

Eddie knew this was a conversation that he had had many times with her but he wanted her to know just how much he loved her if there was any chance that she could hear him. He laid his head on top of her hand as he often had and slowly started to drift off when suddenly he felt something.

"What was that?" he thought still somewhat sleepy not knowing if it was real or a dream and that is when he felt it again. It was Janet's hand. It was moving just a bit but it felt like she was trying to squeeze his hand. He looked up suddenly to her face and that is when he saw it. Her eyelids fluttered ever so slightly and her head moved slightly too. He literally jumped out of the chair screaming "Janet can you hear me?" "Doctor, nurse anyone Janet she is waking up!" Eddie was screaming nearly hysterically at this point. The nurse came in and saw the brief movements Janet was making and said, "I'll go get the doctor." Moments later the doctor came in and started to examine Janet.

"Janet, I am your doctor. You are in a hospital. Can you hear me? Do you understand what I am saying?" the doctor was assessing for any sort of brain damage.

Janet did not respond. The movements stopped just as suddenly as they started. All three of them were stunned. "What just happened here?" Eddie said

"Perhaps these were just involuntary movements and not necessarily Janet regaining consciousness. Let me know if any further movements occur." The doctor said and turned to leave just as Janet opened her eyes.


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34:

Janet opened her eyes for the first time since the day they left New Hampshire. It had been nearly a month since the accident and she had slipped into a coma that no one could really explain. Janet appeared to be a bit confused as she just looked around a bit.

Eddie practically leaped out of the chair when she opened her eyes.

"JANET! JANET babe you're awake!" Eddie said with tears forming in his eyes.

The doctor turned around and saw that Janet's eyes were indeed open.

"Mrs. Latekka, you gave us quite a scare." The doctor said with a smile on his face.

Janet just continued to look around and didn't say anything or smile. This caused some concern with the doctor and especially with Eddie.

"Janet can you hear me?" The doctor said and immediately started to examine Janet's eyes for reaction

Janet started to talk but found it very difficult as her throat was very sore and dry. The doctor saw that she was struggling a bit.

"Here why don't we give you some water. You haven't been talking for quite some time, your throat may be a little dry." The doctor said.

Janet took the drink of water and cleared her throat a bit.

"I can hear you but I don't know where I am or why you called me Mrs. Latekka?" Janet said really softly as tears began to form in her eyes. She knew that she must be in a hospital but she didn't know why and why Eddie was sitting there in the chair or why the doctor called her Mrs. Latekka. The last thing that she remembered was packing up her Jeep getting ready to leave Knight's Ridge after he broke up with her. Her mind started to spin. Did Eddie hurt her and that is why he was there? She remembers how angry he was when she saw him last but she didn't think that he would hurt her.

"Janet you were involved in an accident with Mr. Latekka. You suffered some injuries so you needed surgery and you slipped into a coma after the surgery. It is common for you to have some memory issues when first waking up from such a trama. I called you Mrs. Latekka because you are married to Mr. Latekka." The doctor said so matter of factly.

Eddie just looked at Janet horrified at what he was hearing. "She doesn't remember me. She doesn't remember our wedding." He thought.

"Married? I don't understand. He broke up with me. I was leaving Knights Ridge because he didn't want to see me again. He wanted me to find some place to rot." Janet said getting upset

Janet looked at Eddie now, "What? Are you here to see me suffer? Is that it? Because I slept with Rooster you want me to suffer…" she said becoming almost hysterical.

Eddie was simply speechless. He didn't know what to do or say. He couldn't believe that she had lost so much of her memory. The doctors at one point told him that there was a chance that she would suffer from some memory loss when she did come out of the coma but he had no idea it would be this bad. He got up and walked out of the room. He could see that his being there was upsetting Janet. He walked into the hallway and nearly ran into Hannah.

"Hey Eddie, What's wrong?" Hannah said seeing immediately Eddie was upset

"Janet just woke up…" Eddie began to say but Hannah started yelling before he could finish

"OMG – that is great…why do you look so upset?" Hannah started to say much slower

"She's lost part of her memory…she thinks it is back when we broke up and she was just leaving Knight's Ridge. She doesn't remember coming back or marrying me or anything…how am I going to explain this Hannah? How am I going to explain the baby?" Eddie was nearly becoming hysterical himself.

"Ok, Ok Eddie one thing at a time. The doctors told you that this may happen so she may recover her memory as well. Let's just see how she is doing ok. Eddie you can't run away from this. She is counting on you and so is your baby. No matter how hard this is you need to stay and fight. She fought to come back to you Eddie. She fought to keep your baby safe within her so now you need to help her to remember." Hannah said looking Eddie directly in his tear stained eyes.

"I know Hannah but the things she was saying, that I was only there to see her suffer? Or maybe she even thinks that I caused the accident that put her here…you didn't see the look on her face Hannah…how could she think I would be capable of any of that?" Eddie said tearfully.

"Eddie listen. She is confused and has been through a lot of trauma. She will remember but right now she is scared and doesn't really know what to think. I will go and talk to her, ok but don't go anywhere ok." Hannah said grabbing Eddie's shoulders.

"ok, I am just going to go get some air." Eddie said walking away.

Hannah walked into the room and saw Janet laying there with tears streaming down her face.

"hey sweetie" Hannah said out loud

"Hannah! I am so glad that you are here." Janet said looking at Hannah and for the first time smiled.

"Hey how are you feeling? You gave us quite a scare there young lady." Hannah said walking up to her friend and gave her a big hug than sat on the edge of her bed.

"I am just so confused Hannah. The doctor told me that I am married to Eddie and that I got into a car accident. I just don't see how that is possible. He screamed at me to get out of his hospital room and told me to go rot. I was leaving the Ridge, did I get into an accident on my way out of town or something?" Janet said looking at Hannah almost desperately.

"Janet, that was almost 2 years ago, you did actually leave the ridge for nearly a year but you and Eddie became friends again and then when you moved back to the Ridge he proposed to you and you just got married a day before the accident which was about a month ago." Hannah calmly explained

Janet sat there and was trying to take it all in. She looked at her hands and she didn't see a ring or anything. She was so confused she didn't know what to believe. She hardly thought that Eddie would have ever forgiven her for what she did with Rooster. It was just too much to understand. She sat there silent for a moment while a new batch of tears fell from her eyes.

"Janet I know that this is a lot to take in but I promise you that you will remember all of it eventually. You have been in a coma for almost a month and we were so worried we would lose you or…" With that Hannah just stopped talking. She had forgotten that Janet didn't know about the baby and even if she had she wouldn't remember it now.

Janet looked at Hannah and said, "or what?"

"Maybe you should get some rest Janet and we'll talk more later, Ok?" Hannah said hoping that would be enough

Janet tried to move a little and felt a great deal of discomfort and a little sharp pain. "Ahhh why do I hurt so much?" Janet said looking down at her stomach

Hannah leaped off the bed to try and help her, before she could do anything Janet pulled her blankets back and saw all the wires that were attached to her stomach.

"What happened to me that I need all these wires?" Janet asked Hannah

"You had a collapsed lung and several broken ribs and needed surgery on your spleen but you are doing much better now. You will be sore still from the broken ribs but the doctor said the majority of the pain would have been right away and you pretty much slept through all of that." Hannah said again hoping to avoid the obvious.

"Ok so what are the wires for?" Janet said to Hannah now looking in her eyes.

"Janet, you are pregnant." Hannah said

"I am what?" Janet yelled

"When you were brought in after the accident they discovered that you were 6 – 7 weeks pregnant. You would be almost 11 weeks now." Hannah said looking at Janet

Janet immediately burst into tears. Her mind was spinning.

Hannah looked at Janet and could not understand her reaction. "Janet, why are you so upset, this is a good thing. The baby made it through all that trauma and the doctors say that it has a really strong heart beat-a real fighter."

"Hannah you know what this means, that I am carrying Rooster's baby. How can this be good?" Janet was once again getting nearly hysterical.

"No you're not Janet you are carrying my baby." Eddie said as he walked into the room

Hannah turned and looked at Eddie. He wasn't angry anymore. He looked determined to get his wife back.

"I am going to give you two some time ok, Janet I'll be back in a little while ok?" Hannah said squeezing Janet's hand.

Janet just looked down and didn't know if she could look at Eddie. There was still a part of her brain that just didn't understand what was going on.

"Janet listen to me" Eddie said as he sat in the chair next to her bed and took her hand in his "I know that you can't remember all of this but I am going to tell you exactly what has happened since that day in the hospital when I said those horrible things to you. But things are really good now between you and I. We are going to have a baby Janet. This is a good thing. Oh and I believe this belongs to you." Eddie said with a smile and pulled her wedding ring out of his pocket and placed it back on her ring finger.

Janet just looked at him and then looked at the ring. They must be married because why would he have that ring in his pocket. She pulled her hand away from his and brought it up to her face so she could see the ring. She was hoping that something would spark a memory of all of this but nothing happened. She then placed both of her hands on her belly and could feel the hardness there. She looked at the monitor and could see the heart beating on the screen and knew for the first time that it wasn't her own. Then she looked at Eddie.

The monitor had been turned down so she couldn't hear the heart beats so she said, "Could you turn that monitor up, I want to hear the baby's…our baby's heart beat."

Eddie could not have been happier in that moment hearing her say "our baby" so he reached over and turned up the heart monitor and their baby's heart sounds filled the room. Janet looked down at her belly and just then Eddie placed his hands over hers on her belly and they sat there in silence with their hands resting over their baby and listening to it's heart beat. It was not at all how Janet pictured finding out about her child but at this very moment it was the best sound she can remember ever hearing. For now that was enough.


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35:

Hours later Janet and Eddie's hands were still placed over their baby but Janet was asleep. Eddie sat there enjoying the closeness to their baby and having his hands entangled in hers even if it wasn't quite the way it was before. He wanted to be positive and stay focused on their baby and their future but deep down he knew it wouldn't be that easy as she didn't remember their relationship, their wedding or even how they conceived their baby. He wondered how he was going to help her in remembering. Would he tell her about Dwayne? So much was going through his mind at that time that he just decided to focus his energy on their baby and marvel in it's strength as his little son or daughter had managed to survive all the trauma and still have such a strong heartbeat. He knew somehow that everything would be fine in time.

As Janet lay there sleeping, she began to dream. She dreamt of this beautiful house with lots of flowers. She dreamt of sitting in a room overlooking the flowers and feeling so calm and at peace. Her dreams seem to move from one thing to another. One minute she was in a bar but she knew that it wasn't Sully's. She was talking and laughing with the people. She felt happy and at ease in this place that seemed so foreign to her. She dreamt of a man, not Eddie but a very tall handsome man. He seemed so familiar to her, although she didn't know why. It seemed that her mind was putting all these images in her head for a reason. She woke suddenly.

"Janet are you ok?" Eddie asked concerned. He had noticed that her sleep seemed very restless.

"Yeah, I am I just had some really strange dreams. There were so many places and people…I just don't know…" Janet said drifting off trying to make sense of what her mind was showing her.

"Well why don't you tell me about the dreams and I'll see if I can help you make sense of them. The doctors did say that your memory could come back and maybe all of those images are from the time that you can't remember. You and I talked a lot about what you did when you lived in Hope maybe I can help you understand." Eddie said so sincerely.

Janet just looked at Eddie at that point. She couldn't believe how nice he was being. Her last memory of him was just so awful and he was so angry, but this seems like a whole new man sitting in front of her. He seemed like he just wanted to help her.

"Ok, well the first one had this amazing house with lots of flowers. I remember thinking that it was so beautiful and I felt really happy there." She said

Eddie smiled, "That is the house that you stayed at in Hope. You met these people while visiting your grandparents and they needed someone to watch their home while they were in the nursing home recooperating from their illnesses. This happened when you left Knight's Ridge after we broke up." He said sadly.

Janet looked at Eddie after he said the last statement. She thought, "I did leave the Ridge. Why does he look so sad? He wanted me to leave, he told me to rot?"

"I don't understand Eddie, why do you look so sad? You told me to go find some place to rot. When I left I know that I was doing the right thing because I am the one that cheated." Janet said with uncertainty in her voice.

"I know this is hard to understand right now Janet but I never wanted you to leave the Ridge. I was so angry when you told me about Rooster that all I saw was red. I was in love with you Janet so when you told me that you slept with Rooster I just lost it. I know that you slept with him because of me. Because I was with Rory that night and you saw us kissing. I know that I am the one who is responsible for what you did that night because I didn't tell you how I felt about you before that day and I didn't tell you that Rory was there that day. I have made some mistakes in my life Janet and done some things that I am not proud of but that day was the biggest mistake I have made in my life, well other than telling you to go find some place to rot." Eddie said sadly.

Janet and Eddie sat there for a few minutes quietly. Janet was trying to understand what Eddie was saying and Eddie was hoping he could get through to Janet once again as he had in the past year.

Janet looked at Eddie, "You were in love with me, why didn't you tell me that? Why would you not tell me something I so badly wanted and needed to hear?" she said with tears forming in her eyes.

"Janet I don't know if I can make you understand what I was thinking. You had said that you had never been in a relationship before well I guess to be honest other than Rory in high school I hadn't either. I spent a great deal of time avoiding being in a relationship because I never wanted to feel what I felt when Rory left. Somehow when I began to have feelings for you I knew that I wouldn't be able to avoid it any more. I knew that when I asked you out that this could be the relationship that I wouldn't be able to walk away from and I was right but that scared me. It is hard to find yourself depending on another person even when you don't want to. I knew from the beginning of our relationship that you were different then everyone I had dated prior because we had such an amazing friendship. The bad thing about having all those feelings you become so afraid of losing them or screwing up that you just don't say or do anything in hopes that things will stay the same, or at least that is what I thought. It turns out I was very wrong and it cost me my relationship with you for over a year." Eddie said looking directly at Janet now.

"For over a year?" Janet questioned

"Yeah, you moved away and lived in Hope for about a year." Eddie said not knowing how much more to say.

"So I moved to Hope and lived in these people's home for a year?" Janet asked

"Yeah, you did." Eddie said.

"So in my dream I was a bar but it wasn't Sully's and I was talking to a bunch of people. Was that in Hope too?" Janet asked trying to put it all together

"Yeah, you worked at a bar in the town a few days a week. Big Jim's I think it was called. Everyone loved you there, of course and so you filled in 2 or 3 days a week when Jim needed ya." Eddie said smiling.

"I must have liked it then." Janet said looking at Eddie's smile

"Yeah I think you did. When I came to see you in Hope we went there and I could see how much the people loved you and how comfortable you were behind the bar. It really was a nice town." Eddie said somewhat distracted now.

"So what else happened there? You look like you know something else that you are not telling me. Does it have to do with a tall man?" Janet asked looking right at Eddie to see if he knew who this man was.

Eddie looked at Janet. He was somewhat hoping that Dwayne would be the one thing she wouldn't remember. "Why do you ask?" eddie said.

"In my dream I remember talking with a very tall handsome looking man. I didn't know who he was but I felt like I knew him." She said.

Handsome, huh? That was Dwayne." Eddie said somewhat hurt that she described him as handsome.

"That was Dwayne? What happened to him? How did I know him?" Janet asked.

"Dwayne passed away nearly a year ago. He was a friend of yours in Hope and he had Lou Gehrig's disease." Eddie said.

"Oh, did I have any other friends there." Janet said wanting to know about her life in Hope.

"Yeah you did, most of the town in fact. Everyone knew you because of working in the bar and they also knew the couple that you were house sitting for. It was a pretty small town but you seemed to fit right in." Eddie said smiling once again.

"So why did I leave then?" Janet asked.

"Well the couple was ready to return to their home for one" Eddie said hesitating a bit

"And for the other…" janet said looking at Eddie as if there was more

"The other was me I think. I came to visit you in Hope and we decided to be friends again. I spent about a month in Hope with you. You felt like you could come back to the Ridge at that point." Eddie said not really wanting to talk about Dwayne but had a feeling the discussion was coming.

"You came to Hope and stayed for a month…why would you do that? I don't understand Eddie?" Janet said just looking so confused.

"Janet, Dwayne was more than a friend to you. The two of you dated and I suppose loved each other. I know he loved you and you said that you loved him to me. When I found out that he had passed away I came to Hope to help you, comfort you. You needed a friend. You hadn't told anyone where you were before he died, not even Hannah so when I found out where you were I came right away." Eddie was not looking at Janet anymore while he told her the truth.

Janet sat there trying to understand all the things that Eddie just said. She fell in love with someone else who died and Eddie came to her to be her friend even though they hadn't talked since they broke up. This was a lot for her to take in. Why would he do that? " Janet thought.

Eddie could see that she was having a difficult time trying to understand all the things that he was saying. He said, "Janet you will figure this all out in time. It has only been a day since you woke up from our coma. Right now maybe you should rest and we'll talk about all of this later on ok." Eddie said grabbing her hand and squeezing it.

He was right, Janet thought. She was trying to figure this out it just didn't make sense. She was so in love with Eddie how could she have fallen for someone else. It just didn't make any sense at all. She was devastated when Eddie broke up with her. Now she was carrying Eddie's child and she doesn't even know how they got back together or even married. Her head began to pound and realized that she was in fact really tired.

"Your right Eddie, I think I need to rest some more. Thank you for being honest with me. I don't understand a lot of what you are talking about but I am hoping that it will make sense to me someday. I am sorry that I am putting you through this. I guess since we are married that this must be awful for you since I don't remember anything, but I promise you Eddie I will try and remember." Janet said looking at Eddie.

"You were in an accident Janet, this isn't your fault. But you are right, we are married and I am not going anywhere so you take all the time you need. All I want is my family to be together, healthy and happy. I think we are definitely on our way to healthy and we have time to figure the rest of it out ok?" Eddie said trying to be hopeful. "Now you just rest a bit. I'll be right here if you need me." Eddie said as he got up and kissed his wife on her forehead.

Janet looked up at Eddie and smiled. She closed her eyes and within minutes was soundly sleeping.

Eddie sat down in the chair and just stared at Janet. He had debated whether or not to tell her about Dwayne but if she did get her entire memory back he couldn't risk her being upset with him for being dishonest. He promised her he would always tell her the truth after the whole Rory situation and he was not about to break that promise. The one thing he learned in that situation is that secrets never stay secrets forever and even if you are keeping them for the right reasons in your mind it is much better to tell the truth. He lost Janet once keeping those secrets and he would not risk it again for anything, not for himself and definitely not for their baby. For the first time in Eddie's life, he had a real and true family and he would do anything to protect it.

The days that followed were filled with doctors and nurses checking in on Janet and the baby. She had successfully completed her first trimester and the baby was growing everyday. The heart beat continued to be strong and she started to feel better physically from the injures sustained in the accident but she was now starting to feel the effects of the pregnancy. She was tired and her breasts were really sore. She could feel her body changing. She had lost quite a bit of weight in the month that she was in the coma but was rapidly gaining it back from the baby. She was convinced that this child was a boy. She didn't know why but she was hungry all the time, his reminded her of Eddie and his appetite.

"Ok Janet well it looks like we are going to have to have a going away party because you are ready for release from this place." The nurse said with a big smile on her face. She had cared for Janet since her arrival nearly two months ago. All of her injures have pretty much healed by now and the doctors felt confident that the baby was out of any kind of danger so she could go home and try to find a normalcy before the baby arrives. Janet's memory wasn't back entirely but she seemed to be "dreaming" about that part of her life that was missing when she slept and would ask Eddie everyday what the dreams meant, most of the time he could help her but some things he didn't even know about. They had been working on their relationship little by little as well almost starting over since that part she still didn't remember. Janet was a little nervous when the doctor told her that she would be going home because she didn't know what to do about Eddie and their relationship. Since they were married she knew they would live together but she just didn't know how that would be since she didn't remember their reconciliation. She figured that they would talk more about it when the time came.

Eddie walked in the room while the nurse was in there getting the discharge papers ready and waiting for the doctor to sign off on them. "Hey looks like we are heading home today." Eddie said with a giant grin on his face.

"Yeah it looks that way." Janet said nervously.

Eddie could tell that something was not right with Janet but thought that they could talk about it on the way home.

The doctor came in and signed the necessary paperwork to discharge Janet with instructions on the doctor he contacted in the Ridge to help with the follow up appointments for the baby. Janet was grateful as she didn't even know who she would go to for the baby. She didn't thought that now her focus would be about the baby and learning all the things she would need to to prepare for their arrival in the coming months.

They packed up her things and said their goodbyes to the staff. As they got into Eddie's truck, Janet was very quiet.

"So are you happy to be out of that hospital?" Eddie said trying to start a conversation to figure out what was going on with Janet.

"Yeah…" Janet said distractedly

"What goes on in that head of yours Janet? You look like you are worried about something?" Eddie said trying to look at her but mostly drive. He was still a little skiddish when it came to driving and now with Janet in the truck it was worse.

"I was just thinking about the baby and what we are going to do when we get home…" Janet said with the last part being very quiet.

Eddie sat there and listened to what she said. All of the sudden it hit him, she was worried about when they got home. Her memory hadn't come back yet of their relationship and she didn't know if he would be there or how their relationship would be.

"Janet are you worried about being back in the Ridge? About us? Is that what has got you so quiet?" Eddie asked.

"I guess so, I mean I know that we are married but I don't remember any of it and I just don't know how we are going to live together. I don't know what our routine is or anything?" Janet said with tears forming in her eyes. A part of her felt badly because she knew that Eddie was the most important person to her at one time and but that day in the hospital was so fresh in her memory she still felt so guarded and didn't know what to do.

"Janet I don't want you to worry about anything ok. We will figure all of that out as time goes. If you want me to sleep on the couch I will but I am not leaving the house. We are married and I am committed to getting you through this Janet. Your memory will come back and when it does we will then be able to focus on our baby, Ok?" Eddie said confidently.

"Ok, Eddie but you shouldn't have to sleep on the couch. That doesn't seem fair. Please just be patient with me, ok?" Janet said looking down at her hands.

"You don't even need to worry about that Janet, I love you and I will wait forever if I need to." Eddie said grabbing her hand and lacing his fingers with hers.

Janet looked over at Eddie for the first time and smiled. It was the first time that Janet felt that everything would be ok.

They arrived home around two hours later and Eddie grabbed all the bags and walked into the house first. Janet sat in the truck for a minute just to mentally prepare herself for going in. She didn't know why she was so hesitant but something in her just kept her sitting there.

Eddie came back out of the house and opened up Janet's door. He gave her his hand and helped her down from the truck. He had gotten a new one since his accident and it was a bit higher off the ground then his last one. Since the accident was the tow truck's fault, Eddie and Janet had gotten a new truck, all of Janet's medical bills were paid and they had gotten an additional settlement for the severity of the injuries. Janet of course didn't know about any of it but Eddie had taken care of all the paperwork and meetings in regards to the matter. The settlement was enough to prepare for the baby and pretty much pay for it's college education if they chose to go in the future. Eddie had big plans for getting a room ready for the baby but wanted to have Janet be a part of it so he held off on telling her about all the details just yet.

They walked into the house with Eddie holding Janet's hand the entire way. She looked around the room as she walked in and everything pretty much looked the same, which made her feel much more comfortable. Eddie led her to the couch so she could rest a bit. She hadn't had much activity since the coma so they were still working on her mobility. She could walk and did so everyday that she had been awake working with the physical therapy staff to strengthen her muscles. She responded to the therapy well but still tired easily.

She sat on the couch and then noticed the grandfather clock in the corner of the room. She hadn't remembered that so she thought that must have been new. She got up and walked over to it. It was absolutely beautiful. Eddie had gone into the kitchen to get her some water. Janet began to run her fingers across the clock and noticed the inscription and date. She stared at it for a second and suddenly screamed, "EDDIE!"

Eddie dropped the glass of water that was in his hand and ran over to Janet. "What is it? What's wrong Janet? Is it the baby?" Eddie began to feel around her belly as if he could feel the problem.

Janet turned around and looked right into Eddie's eyes, "No Eddie it's not the baby…I remember Eddie…I remember it all." Janet said with tears streaming down and a big smile on her face.


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36:

"You what?" Eddie said with disbelief

"I remember…I don't know what happened…I just came over here to look at this clock and read the inscription and I was running my fingers over the engraving and it was like something just let go in my head and I remembered. I remembered you and I standing facing each other by a lake and my grandparents were there but no one else and then I remember us laying on the floor in the biggest living room I have ever seen with all these windows and we were just looking at each other…" Janet said almost breathless as if she was trying to get it all out at once.

Eddie just stared at Janet as she was describing their wedding and their time together before the accident and all he could do was smile. She remembered their life. She remembered.

Janet continued to talk, "and then we were in the truck and I remember looking at you and your face looked past me and your facial expression just changed and before I could figure out why I felt this huge crash and then I woke up in the hospital."

Janet threw herself in to Eddie's arms and hugged him so tightly. It felt just as it had before the accident. She was confident in their love once again and didn't have any doubts like when she stepped into their home not even an hour ago.

Eddie hugged her back so tightly he was afraid to let her go. He didn't want this to go away or be some kind of dream. He wanted to keep her so close to him to make sure all of this was really happening.

"Eddie, honey you are going to have to loosen up a bit I am having some problems breathing here." Janet said chuckling

"No! I will loosen up a little but I am not letting you go." Eddie said chuckling right back

"Sweetie, I am not going anywhere I promise. I know that you were scared but everything is going to be ok, I promise."

Eddie leaned back and looked at Janet and she smiled at him so brightly he just couldn't help himself. He grabbed her face placing his hands on either side of her cheeks and he kissed her with all the emotion and passion he was feeling. He has lost her for a month and these last weeks with her not being able to remember their life together were just too much for him. He had missed her so much, much more than he ever dreamed. To be kissing her and holding her so close to him and her feeling the same way about him he just couldn't hold back any longer.

As the emotion poured out of Eddie and into that kiss so did the tears. He began to uncontrollably cry. All the emotions were coming out of Eddie at this point. Janet pulled away from the kiss as she felt the tears hit her face. She looked into Eddie's eyes and could see all the love and emotion that he was feeling and had been feeling since the accident. She knew in that moment what Eddie needed. She placed her hands on his face and began to wipe away the tears with her thumbs. Eddie just stood there and let her see straight into his heart as he could no longer control his emotions.

Janet gently began to move her hands from his face to his shirt and began to unbutton his flannel shirt so slowly. Eddie seemed frozen not really knowing what she was doing but he felt as though he did not have the strength to move. She removed his shirt from his shoulders and began to then lift his t shirt over his head. His arms went up instinctively and that too joined his flannel on the floor. She then took a step back and went over to the dining room table and grabbed a chair. She brought the chair over to the middle of the living room just behind where Eddie was standing. She then moved to the front of Eddie again and placed her hands on his shoulders. She was looking directly into his eyes and he was looking into hers. He didn't move or do anything. She ran her hands down his chest and then proceeded to kiss her way down the same path. She again looked into his eyes and grabbed the button on his jeans. Soon those and his boxers joined the rest of his clothing on the floor. She gently sat a very naked Eddie in the chair.

He just looked at her as if he could not believe what was happening. He had no idea after the accident when if ever he would have the opportunity to be with Janet again and when she woke from her coma not remembering their relationship he felt as though it would take a long time to even think about that part of their relationship. The doctors had told Eddie that he would need to let Janet tell him when she felt comfortable for this type of activity with the pregnancy and the injuries it would have to be when she felt ready. Eddie hadn't even contemplated the subject until she began to comfort him. He still felt as though he needed to let Janet go as far as she wanted but it appeared that she was ready now.

Janet took a step back and began to remove her clothing piece by piece. There was something about all the emotions that they were both feeling mixed with her hormones from the pregnancy that was guiding Janet in the direction that she was heading. She had missed her husband and with all the support and love he had shown her while she was in the coma and when she woke up and couldn't remember anything she was overcome with love when she remembered her life and how much this man meant to her. She wanted to be able to comfort him as he had done for her. Her body was changing so much but at this time that was the last thing she cared about or was thinking about. The one thing that she did notice immediately was the size of her chest. She had never been a real busty girl but obviously that was changing slowly with her pregnancy. Since she knew that Eddie was a boob man she was going to give him exactly what he wanted and that was those beautiful gifts right in front of him to enjoy.

Janet took a step forward and sat right down on Eddie's lap facing him. He was still motionless as if he had no idea what to do. This was not something that they had ever engaged in before so it was all a little new for him but truth be told he loved every minute of it. Eddie was very ready for her and together they became one. She looked into his eyes and smiled. There were no words just a connection that was unbreakable. Eddie moved his arms around Janet now and he broke the eye connection to go to his now favorite place on Janet's body. Janet reached around Eddie with her arms and grabbed the back of the chair. She moved on Eddie's lap and together they spent the next hour enjoying each other in a whole new way.

After Janet and Eddie had completely and thoroughly enjoyed each other and their breathing had returned to normal they spoke for the first time in what seemed like hours.

"That was amazing Janet." Was all Eddie could say.

"Yeah it was. What do you say we take this into our bedroom." Janet said with a smile.

"Sounds good to me." Eddie said.

Janet got up from her position and Eddie followed. Together they walked into their bedroom and got underneath the covers and snuggled into each other. Both wanted to feel the closeness after their connection as husband and wife had been reestablished in the living room.

Janet was the first one to speak. "I guess that is why the store owner gave me that treasure box." She said laughing a little.

Eddie looked down at her a little trying to figure out what she was talking about and then he thought of the clock. "Yeah, when you were looking at those boxes I saw this clock and thought it would be an amazing wedding gift to you. I remember you once talking about your parents having a grandfather clock and how much you enjoyed listening to the chimes. When I saw it in the shop and the owner said he could engrave a message on it I bought it instantly. It was supposed to be delivered to you when we got home as a surprise but that didn't exactly happen." Eddie said a little more quietly.

Janet looked up at Eddie as she had her face resting on his chest previously. "It may not have gone how you wanted it too but I think it turned out pretty good. I can't believe you remembered me talking about that grandfather clock…I didn't even think you were listening (she laughed). It is a wonderful reminder of the most special and amazing day of my life when you became my husband and every time I look at it I will always remember Eddie. She said as she leaned up and gave him a quick kiss. "How did you get it here though if you were at the hospital with me?"

"I came home one morning to shower about a week and a half after the accident. Nick and Hannah practically threw me out of the hospital because I smelled so bad. I hadn't showered or changed my clothes from the accident. I didn't care I didn't want to leave you in case you woke up but they insisted that I get a night's worth of sleep and shower. I finally relented because I had no choice. I was actually still sleeping when I heard the door bell ring. I had forgotten all about it and when I saw it I pretty much lost it. All I could think of was what if you didn't wake up…what if you never got to see the clock or meet our baby…what if…" Eddie said sadly.

"I am so sorry that you went through all of that babe." Janet said sweetly

"When Hannah told me I was pregnant I was so stunned…it was like the time frame was all messed up. The thought that Rooster could have fathered my child…it made me sick to my stomach but when you walked in and said it was yours even though at the time I didn't think we were together my stomach filled with all these butterflies…just like it did when you asked me to go meet Ernesto." Janet said with a sly smile.

"Butterflies, huh? Seriously though, I can't tell you what it felt like to hear that you thought I was there to watch you suffer. It felt worse than the beating I took from Matt. I know that we talked about this already but all I could think of when you said that was how upset you must have been to feel like you had to leave the Ridge and to know that I was the cause of that pain you were in…it is something I will never forget. I really am sorry for what I said to you that day Janet." Eddie said softly

"Eddie we did talk about that already and that is all in the past, ok. We have this amazing little one here (as Janet turned slightly and laid on her back and place her hands on her belly) and that should be what we focus on now…not the past hurt that we caused each other but this little baby who made it through so much to be here with us today. That is what is important because he or she was made out of love." Janet said looking over to Eddie who was now laying on his side facing Janet with one hand cradling his head and the other rubbing across Janet's belly.

"That he or she was." Eddie said smiling

"Did the doctor give you a time frame of when the baby was conceived because I have absolutely no idea…I don't think I was ever late or anything?" Janet said looking at her belly.

"The night of the accident when you needed surgery is when they discovered you were pregnant. At that time, he estimated the baby at about 6 – 7 weeks...so I got to thinking when that would have been. Do you remember that night that we got into that bad argument about you leaving?" Eddie said looking at Janet now.

"You mean the day that you came home from work after you left without saying anything to me and you finally told me how you felt about me leaving the Ridge?" Janet said

"Yeah I guess it was during the day wasn't it. Best advice Nick ever gave me was to come back home and talk to you instead of keeping it to myself." Eddie said

"I am going to have to thank him some day for that…if he hadn't done that we wouldn't have this (she focused back on her belly once again) little one to love and look forward to." Janet said rubbing her belly and smiling.

"How is it possible to love something so much that you haven't seen but that you know is there?" Janet asked.

Eddie suddenly leapt out of bed and went into the living room. He returned moments later with his wallet in his hand.

"what are you doing Eddie?" Janet looked at him and asked confused

Eddie pulled something out of his wallet and handed it to Janet. As she looked at the picture it took her a second to figure out what it was. Suddenly tears filled her eyes…

"Is this our baby?" Janet asked looking at Eddie.

"Yeah, while you were in a coma they would do ultrasounds frequently to check on the baby. They would print off a picture every time they did it so I could see how the baby was progressing. So now you can see what you love so much." Eddie said so proudly.

"Yes it can." Janet said looking at picture as tears rolled from her eyes.

The two snuggled in together and spent the next few hours just enjoying being together…all three of them.


	37. Chapter 37

Chapter 37:

A month had flown by it seemed so quickly for Eddie and Janet. Their baby was growing every day and soon it would be time to see what they were having. Both of them wanted to know and were very excited to find out. Eddie was so surprised at just how happy he really was that they were having a baby. He hadn't really thought about it before since it was just so amazing to him that they were able to find each other again and then got married on such a spur of the moment. He thought to himself, "thank God we did that because planning a wedding right now would be absolutely insane. Now we can just focus on the baby."

Eddie left for work one morning after kissing his lovely wife of nearly 5 months. He had gotten very used to the routine the two had developed over time. Janet went back to Sully's after some time but only worked 6 hour shifts and only during the day. The latest she would work in the evening was 7pm so they could have dinner together every night. Eddie would adjust his schedule so on the days she did work until 7 he was working almost up to that point. It came in handy on some jobs and even helped them get some jobs done sooner then anticipated making their customers extremely happy and in turn giving them more business.

Eddie got into BFW. "Hey buddy what goes on today." Eddie said to Nick

"Well we have a job somewhat out of town on the ol' Gustopherson estate. There are a lot of windows so expect to be out there pretty much all day into the evening." Nick said still looking at the job calendar.

"Ok sounds good, Ikey is with me right?" Eddie said with a smile

"Yeah, he'll just meet you out there though…he said something about having to go somewhere this morning…I wasn't really listening so much." Nick said distractly

"Hey Nick, what goes on with you? You seem like you are a million miles away…everything ok with the Commander?" Eddie said with concern

"Yeah, he is ok. Hannah just dropped this huge bomb on me last night and I gotta say I kind of knew it would happen eventually but it is still throwing me for a loop." Nick said looking up and at Eddie for the first time.

"What did she say?" Eddie asked

"For starters, she finally admitted that I am Sam's father, which I think we both knew was the case – peanut allergy…" Nick said talking with his hands

Eddie looked at him and just shook his head as if to say "yeah that was a given."

"But then she starts talking about our relationship and how to work out arrangements for Sam and all this stuff…I was like hang on a second…I just found out I'm a dad and you want to start making plans and arrangements and days of the week…my head was just spinning and still is." Nick said exhaustedly

"I hear ya buddy but did you expect anything less from Hannah…you have known her for a long time…that sounds to me like typical Hannah." Eddie said chuckling

"Yeah I know but it was just a lot to take in and when I asked her to take a breath well lets just say it didn't go over very well." Nick said with a smirk

Eddie laughed. "To be a fly on that wall." Eddie said laughing outwardly now.

"It is just going to take me a minute or two to settle into it you know, I mean I have always thought I was Sam's father but all the in's and out's of it all well that is an entirely different story. On top of all of that, Aubrey tells me that she is in love with Ronnie." Nick says once again talking with his hands.

Eddie had heard a long time ago about some kiss between Ronnie and Aubrey but nothing ever seemed to come of it and when Hannah's marriage didn't happen Aubrey really started acting differently. During the year Janet was gone Eddie didn't pay much attention to anyone else's life really but he knew that things had cooled way down with Nick and Aubrey.

"So how do you feel about that?" Eddie asked slowly

"You know strangely enough I wasn't that upset about it. We haven't really connected in a long time and I could see the way they interacted with each other. They weren't doing a good job of hiding their feelings. I was actually relieved to be having the conversation after so much time. Now I just have to figure out what to do with the rest of my life." Nick said chuckling slightly

"I don't envy your task Nick, I have been there but one word to the wise, don't settle go after what you want and who you want. It is worth it trust me." Eddie said confidently.

Nick looked at Eddie as if this strange person was standing in front of him. How times had changed that Eddie was the strong, stable one with his life totally figured out. He was really happy for Eddie because being with Janet and now having a baby – this was the happiest Nick had ever seen Eddie.

"Yeah I know buddy, all I have to do is look at you. You are like the pillar of happiness." Nick said jokingly

"Make fun if you want to but I can't imagine my life without Janet in it but there are definitely things I would do differently given the chance. I'm just saying that you take the time you need but figure it out already!" Eddie said smackin Nick on the shoulder.

"Yeah yeah." Nick said

"Ok I am heading out to the Gustopherson estate. I will probably head home right from there so I'll catch ya tomorrow." Eddie said walking out of BFW

Eddie was heading out of town to the country side of The Ridge. It was very peaceful out there and there was the most amazing old houses with great landscaping. Eddie always noticed the landscaping even though that business was done and over with for him. There was always a part of him that missed being outside and working with the earth.

That is when he saw it, this huge Victorian style house that had a modest yard big enough but not overwhelmingly so. The landscaping was ok but he knew that there was so much potential there. The "for sale" sign had a name and number listed so he called it curious to see what he asking price was. The real estate agent said that the house had just gone on the market only a week or so ago and there hadn't been a showing yet. Eddie asked if he could schedule a time to see it. He couldn't wait to tell Janet because if the inside was as nice as the outside, he could really see him and Janet living there with their baby.

Eddie called Janet. "Hey beautiful what goes on?" Eddie said charmingly on the phone.

Janet had the day off so she was doing some laundry and catching up on her shows that she had recorded enjoying her alone time.

"Hey babe, not much going on here, just doing some laundry, pretty boring actually. Where are you?" She said so cheerfully

"I am heading out to the Gustopherson estate but I came across this house and I called the real estate agent. We have a scheduled showing tomorrow at 9am – can you make it?" Eddie asked so excited.

"Yeah I don't work until 11am so that will work. I wasn't aware we were looking for houses." Janet said

"I wasn't really but when I saw this house on my way to work I couldn't help but call. It is perfect Janet. I can't wait to see the inside. I think you are going to love it. It reminds me a lot of the house in Hope." Eddie said hoping that she would get as excited as him.

"Wow, well I guess we will see it tomorrow then. What time do you think you will be home tonight?" Janet said changing the subject.

"Ahhh, probably around 7 or so, why is everything ok?" Eddie asked worrying

"Everything is fine, just wanted to know when to have dinner ready is all." Janet said chuckling at how Eddie is so worried about her all the time now.

"Oh, Ok yeah I will do my best to be home than. Love ya babe." Eddie said before he hung up the phone

"We love you right back." Janet said smiling. She always said we now when she talked to Eddie knowing that it always made him smile when she referenced the baby.

The next morning Eddie was up bright and early. Even though his night was a lot later than he expected and he was exhausted when he got home he couldn't help himself now. Janet on the other hand had a hard time getting up and going for the day. The baby seemed to like to sleep in and therefore she seemed so much more tired then she ever had in the past. She was always a morning person but now she struggled to wake up. Eddie thought it was so funny because he knew how much it bothered Janet to not be in so much control.

They arrived at the house at exactly 9 am and the real estate agent was waiting for them. Eddie had this huge smile on his face as he drove down the driveway and looked around closer than he had yesterday. The yard could use a bit more work but that he could easily take care of and the porch was huge…he could picture wicker furniture and him and Janet sitting out there together drinking their coffee in the morning. Eddie couldn't help but picture them in the yard with their children running around free to play and be loud. He also couldn't help but think about that beautiful garden that Mrs. Edwardson had in Hope. He wanted so much to give Janet that garden and with this home he knew he could, he only hoped that the inside was half as promising as the outside.

Janet looked around the yard as they drove and couldn't believe her eyes. It was so similar to the house in Hope. The yard with big and the porch was amazing. She pictured herself being able to sit outside on the porch and read in the early afternoon sun and watch her children play in the yard. She also thought about her promise to Dwayne. She promised she would spread his ashes in a beautiful garden so when she was the happiest in her life he would be there to share it with her. She could see that garden in this yard. She looked over at Eddie and smiled. He looked like a kid on Christmas morning. She just had a feeling they would be leaving with a new home.

The real estate agent met them both on the top step of the porch and led Eddie and Janet throughout this beautiful home. It had 4 bedrooms and two bathrooms. It had an amazing kitchen that over looked the back yard and right off the dining room was a sun porch. It wasn't as big as the one in Hope but Janet saw the potential. The master bedroom was simply amazing. It was a big room with a huge bathroom attached. It also had French doors leading out to a balcony style porch off the bedroom. It wasn't huge but you could definitely put a small chair and table out there to read or drink your coffee. It was simply perfect in Janet's eyes. She saw a large bed with a sitting area and to top it off the one thing she hadn't expected was the huge walk in closet. Not as typical in a Victorian style home but the owners had made some alterations to the design when they moved in to accommodate their needs. As it turns out their needs matching Janet's to a T. Janet and Eddie were walking through every room with such joy and the overwhelming sense to scream with sheer happiness but knew that was not the way to handle this situation so they kept their excitement under wraps.

The real estate agent finished the tour and gave Eddie and Janet a chance to spend some time alone to talk while she went outside to "look around". Before Janet could open her mouth Eddie was grabbing her by the shoulders and blurting out all the things he loved about the house. At that moment, Janet was completely overtaken by the feeling she was having inside. She didn't know what was happening but it was taking her by surprise. She began to feel things that she had never felt before. She wanted so much to tell Eddie but he was so caught up in the house she was having a hard time getting his attention. Suddenly, she got this look on her face and grabbed her belly.

Eddie froze. He saw the look on her face and knew something was wrong. "Janet what's wrong? Is it the baby?" he said terrified of the answer.

Janet looked at him and suddenly this huge smile came across her face. "The baby, Eddie, I think I just felt the baby move." She said smiling

Suddenly Eddie realized that the look was not of fear but of happiness. He had heard about the first time you feel the baby move it feels strange but wonderful. "Really our baby moved…can I feel it?" he said anxiously

"I don't know Eddie but it happened again. It feels so amazing…I wish you could." Janet said grabbing her belly again

Eddie could not believe this was happening. It made it so much more real for him. He realized that this is exactly what he wanted from his life. He had the woman he loved by his side and now their baby was healthy and strong and making their presence known. Maybe the baby was trying to tell his or her daddy something.

"Janet what do you think about the house?" he said hoping she loved it as much as him

"Eddie I think this house is perfect. But can we afford it especially with the baby coming?" Janet said not wanting to get her hopes up.

"Yeah I think we can. You said you wanted to use the money from Dwayne for our future and I think he would be happy to use it here. We also got money from our accident so I think we have enough to cover the cost so we wouldn't even have a house payment. We could sell or rent out your house and use that money for the taxes and what ever expenses we would need. You wouldn't even need to work if you didn't want to." Eddie said the last part he wasn't sure how she would take.

"Money from our accident?" Janet didn't know what he was talking about

"Oh I am sorry Janet I guess you didn't know about that did you. The tow truck company paid all your medical expenses and replaced my truck and gave us a settlement due to the severity of the accident. It was quite a bit actually but you were in a coma and no one knew if you would survive especially once we all found out about the baby." Eddie said sadly as if the statement brought back the memory.

Janet just looked at Eddie stunned. She hadn't really thought about any of that but then again it made sense as to why no one ever talked about the bills or anything. "I am sorry Eddie that you had to go through all of that." She said grabbing each side of his face "but I think that this house would be an amazing start to our new life with our baby and just think of all the fun we could have in our bedroom here while we are still a two some." She said smiling trying to lighten the mood a bit

Eddie just smiled knowing exactly what she was doing. "Where do we sign!" he said grabbing Janet and kissing her passionately.

They walked out hand in hand to where the real estate agent was standing and before she could say "let's tour the grounds" Eddie said, "take the sign down we'll take it."


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38:

After working out all the details with the real estate agent, Eddie and Janet were on their way back to home. Both of them seem to be beaming. It seemed like now that they had found the house that would accommodate their family and future members even they had a renewed direction and sense of excitement for the future. Eddie was holding Janet's hand and grabbed it suddenly and brought it up to his mouth and kissed her palm.

"What was that for?" janet asked looking at Eddie

"Nothing really just thinking about how amazing this house is going to be and now we can really start to prepare for the baby. We should really sit down and start making a list of everything we are going to need. What colors do you think we should make the baby's room?" Eddie said looking over at Janet

Janet hadn't really thought about any of that. She had only had a few weeks to get used to the idea of having a baby and remembering her past really so she was really still adjusting. "I hadn't really thought about it but I think we should wait until we find out what we are having and that appointment isn't for a few weeks yet." Janet said.

"Ok, well we will need to start packing and decide what things we are bringing to the house or what things we want to give away. We should probably talk about whether you want to sell your house or rent it out. Maybe if you rent it out you can just leave the furniture and we can get what we need for the new house." Eddie said talking as if he was establishing a window contract.

"Eddie, how can we afford to get all new furniture with literally buying a new house? How much money did they give us anyway?" Janet said looking at Eddie with extreme curiousity.

Eddie was reluctant to tell her just how much they gave them. He was so upset during that time he didn't really question much of what they offered. The tow truck company wanted him to sign off on it so if something did happen to Janet they wouldn't be held liable knowing full well that their driver was most definitely at fault. She was in a coma and she was pregnant so the company threw a lot of money there way knowing that if he took it to court it would be worth so much more. The whole thing reminded Eddie of that time in his life when he thought he truly may have lost everything he ever wanted…again.

"I don't want you to freak out when I tell you but just know that we have enough to purchase the house and all new furniture if you want it." Eddie said quietly hoping Janet wouldn't ask any questions.

"Eddie what is really going on here? You have been dodging this question all day." She said pulling her hand away from his and moving so she was more facing him now.

Eddie knew that there was no way around it now. "Janet it is just not something I like talking about. You were in a COMA and pregnant with my child and I didn't know if you were going to live – either of you so I didn't pay much attention to any of the paperwork. All I cared about was the bills being paid and for them to get out of my face because it was taking time away from you and that I wasn't going to give up. But the situation was serious and the money reflects the seriousness of the injuries." He said rather rapidly.

"Ok, I understand that this was upsetting to you Eddie and I am not trying to get you to relive any of this but I need to know what that amount is." Janet said.

Eddie looked at her and said, "$500,000"

"WHAT? They gave us half a million dollars! Eddie how could you not tell me that!" Janet said getting rather upset.

"because I didn't think that was the first thing you needed to know when you woke up." Eddie said getting upset himself.

"I understand that but that is a great deal of money Eddie. Where did you put it?" Janet asked

"I just put the money in the same savings account with Dwayne's life insurance money. But you need to understand that I paid all the medical bills and my truck out of that money so there is about $250,000 left." Eddie said.

"I'm sorry Eddie. I don't mean to get upset it is just that that is a lot of money and it just feels weird to have that much." Janet said.

"I understand babe but this money can give us the house we always wanted and get us set for the start of our family…it isn't a bad thing." Eddie said.

"I guess knowing why we have it is the problem…I guess I didn't realize how life threatening my injuries were…maybe I am just trying to understand why I lived and why our baby lived." Janet said looking down at her hands.

Ok that Eddie did not expect. "What do you mean wondering why you lived? What does that mean Janet?" Eddie was just stunned.

"They don't give out that kind of money unless it is very serious and I just wonder why God let me live is all…" Janet said not really understanding how to explain how she was feeling.

"Oh, Janet, you lived because we love each other and we have our baby now and because I would not have made it if you hadn't." eddie said being very truthful.

"what are you saying Eddie?" Janet said looking at Eddie.

"I am saying that I lived through you leaving once Janet and I could not do it again." Eddie said softly

"I'm sorry Eddie. I shouldn't have brought this up now. I think maybe I need to talk to someone about the accident and my feelings about it. I feel like I have survivor's guilt or something." Janet said looking at her belly and placing her hands on it and rubbing it slowly.

"Baby you shouldn't feel guilty about surviving. We have so much to look forward to, please don't feel badly." Eddie said placing his hand on her belly as well.

"I know in my head that what you are saying is true but in my heart I feel like I need to worthy of this second chance, you know." Janet said.

"You are worthy of it Janet. You have this little one here who is depending on you and you were definitely meant to be it's mother." Eddie said continuing to rub around her belly.

"I love him or her so much already Eddie it is so crazy. Today when I felt the baby move I was so excited and happy and emotional all at the same time. I just wish you could feel it too." Janet said once again looking at her belly with the littlest baby bump.

"I can't wait until I can feel it too. Don't worry babe everything will be just fine, I promise." Eddie said.

Eddie dropped Janet off at home and went on to work. He hated to leave her there alone knowing that she was struggling with her feelings from the accident but Nick and Ikey were already on the job site and he knew they were waiting on him to get there. Eddie walked Janet to the door and kissed her passionately. They pulled away from one another and Eddie said, "Are you sure that you will be ok here? I can call Hannah if you don't want to be a lone."

"No Eddie that is ok. We will be just fine. Now go to work and I'll see ya later on tonight ok." Janet said hoping she was convincing.

"Ok but if you need anything let me know, I am only a phone call away." Eddie said kissing her one more time and then he got into this truck and he was gone.

Hours later, Janet had went through some of her things and started to decide what to keep and what to get rid of when the phone rang.

"Hey Hannah, what goes on?" Janet said smiling.

"Nothing just wondering what you were up too, I feel like we haven't seen each other in forever." Hannah said clearly needing some girl time.

"Not much, hey how bout I head on over and we can have some coffee and get some gab time in…what do ya say?" Janet said smiling

"Sounds great. See ya in a few." Hannah said clearly more happily then when she said hello.

It had been a few more hours and Hannah and Janet had been chit chatting about all the stuff that had been going on since the accident. Janet told Hannah about her last doctors appointment and finally got around to telling her about the house. Hannah was so shocked but had to contain her thoughts as the phone rang.

"Hold that thought janet!" Hannah said chuckling a bit and answered the phone "WHAT? Who was it?" She screamed into the phone.

Suddenly she dropped the phone and said to Janet, "we have to go Janet!" she said nearly hysterically

"What is going on Hannah? Janet was clueless as to what was going on.

"There was an accident on the job site…they are taking them to the hospital now…we have to go." Hannah said

Janet sat there a second to let the information sink in. "Was it Eddie? Was he hurt?" Janet now was borderlining on hysterical

"I don't know Janet. The EMT's didn't know the name of the person all they said was that they were unconscious and had severe injuries. Apparently they feel from the scaffolding or something. Janet, it could be any of them. – all three of them were working on this job. We just have to go." Hannah and Janet both flew out the door and headed for the emergency room.


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter 39:

Janet and Hannah raced into the emergency room and came right up to the desk. Both of them started to speak but Hannah took over.

"Nurse, could you please tell me who they brought in from best friend windows, there was an accident and we were told they were brought here." Hannah said breathlessly

The nurse looked at the two women. "Are you his wife?" the nurse asked.

"We don't know who was brought in here. There were three men working on that job, Eddie, Nick and Ikey…I mean David." Janet said quickly

"I can't tell you anything unless your family." The nurse said rather coldly.

"Look my husband is Eddie can you at least tell me if he is ok." Janet said abruptly.

"Can you come with me?" the nurse said looking at Janet a little differently

Janet suddenly felt sick to her stomach. It was Eddie that was hurt. She stood a step but swayed a bit. Hannah grabbed her. "Janet do you want me to go with you?" Hannah said concerned

"No, I need to do this. He was there for me so I will be his strength now." Janet said straightening herself up.

"Ok follow me." The nurse said putting her hand on Janet's shoulder as they walked through the door.

Hannah stood there unable to move. She couldn't understand what had happened, they were always so careful. She felt so badly for Janet and their baby, but yet something came over her and suddenly she realized that she needs to talk with Nick. She needs to talk to him and talk about their future if there would be one. "No more dancing around this subject Hannah now is the time." She thought to herself. She took a seat in the waiting room area.

Janet took one step and then another trying to find the strength to face what was in the curtained area just in front of her. The nurse was talking to her about the injuries Eddie sustained and her mind just sort of shut down. This just couldn't be happening. How can a person live through all of those injuries Janet thought. Her hand moved to her belly as if this one action would bring her some kind of comfort. All she could see was her baby being born without Eddie there. It was almost more than she could bear. The nurse continued to talk, "he fell several stories so there may be a possibility of a broken back or neck. He hasn't been conscious so there is a likelihood that he suffered some head trauma…we won't know until we begin to do the scans and figure out how extensive the trauma is that he sustained…I will need you to sign some forms for consent to…." The nurse rambled on and they arrived at his bed. She moved the curtain back and Janet was shocked to see what was in front of her.

Janet suddenly collapsed to the floor. The nurse was standing very near her so she reacted quickly and grabbed Janet before she hit the floor. Seconds later Janet returned to consciousness and was able to stand on her own. She walked over to the bed and looked at the face in front of her. The bruises were already forming and the blood was soaked in to his shirt. She touched his face and said, "I'm so sorry that this happened to you." She turned back to the nurse and said, "this isn't my husband, this is Ikey, David Eickhorn. He is wearing the shirt that a bought for Eddie when they opened their business. It has his name embroidered on it but this isn't Eddie." Janet said with the largest amount of relief she had ever felt better followed by a lot of guilt for being happy that it was Ikey instead of Eddie.

The nurse looked at her and said, 'Oh my God, Mrs. Latekka I am so sorry. He was unconscious and was not able to tell anyone what his name was so when we saw the shirt we assumed that he was Eddie Latekka." The nurse looked as though she was about to cry.

"No matter, we are his family anyway. He is single and has been working with my husband for the past 10 years so we consider him to be our family. What do we need to do to help him." Janet said as tears fell from her eyes.

Hannah sat on the chairs with her head in her hands and tears falling from her eyes. She couldn't believe that this was happening. How could Janet be having a baby and now moving into a new house alone. It just wasn't fair but at the same time she was so thankful that Nick was ok. She felt like this was the second chance that God was giving her to finally resolve her feelings for Nick and their story.

Suddenly the emergency room doors flew open and they ran Nick and Eddie trying to find Ikey. Hannah looked up and saw them standing there. She froze as if she were looking at a ghost. "What are you doing here?" Hannah said clearly confused that Eddie was standing in front of her.

"What are you talking about Hannah? We are here for Ikey. He fell off the scaffolding working on the upper windows of the Parker's house. It was a few stories up and when he hit the ground he wasn't moving and was out cold. I just don't understand what happened…" Eddie said feeling so guilty for being late to the job site because of the house in the morning.

"Eddie the nurse took Janet back there, she thinks you are the one who was hurt. Janet thinks that you are the one." Hannah was rambling still trying to understand. 

"WHAT? They did WHAT? Why did they do that to her? She can't be under that kind of stress she's pregnant. I have to go back there." Eddie said frantically and began to run over to the doors when they opened and they all saw a tear faced Janet walk through.

Janet looked up and saw Hannah, Nick and Eddie, her Eddie. She burst into tears once again and ran to Eddie. He picked her up and they embraced so tightly. "Hey babe, shhhh it's ok I'm right here and I am just fine. I'm so sorry that they put you through that." Eddie said trying to console an obviously upset Janet

Janet pulled back slightly and took Eddie face into her face. She just stared at him for a moment and kissed him passionately.

Seconds later, Janet pulled away from Eddie and stepped back slightly. She looked at them all now. "Ikey is in really rough shape. They believe he has head trauma and possibly injuries to his neck, back and internal organs. He is almost unrecognizable due to the swelling but that hair is unmistakable. He needs us guys, ok so we are going to do whatever it takes to help him through this." Janet said so matter of factly. She couldn't possibly describe exactly what Ikey looked like to Nick and Eddie because he looked so much worse then she just described. The likelihood that he survived this fall the doctors said was less than 50% but they would know more after all the scans. Janet authorized all the tests that needed to be done and told the doctors that the bills should come to her personally. She knew that BFW had insurance but it wasn't nearly good enough to cover all of this and Eddie and Nick would bankrupt the company to help Ikey so she decided since Dwayne had given her that money to help her that she would use it to help Ikey. The money that the tow truck company paid would be more than enough to start them off well for their house but Ikey's life was more important right now so Janet did what she thought was right. She didn't know how she was going to tell Eddie because he would be upset that she was trying to take care of his responsibility but she didn't want him to lose another business that he loved. She would find a way to tell him at some point.

Nick and Eddie looked as though they would be sick. They looked at each other and said almost simultaneously "anything he needs he will have."

"That is what I thought. So he will be in testing for the next few hours and the doctor will come out here and let us know when they know what we are up against. Does he have any family that we can contact?" Janet said.

Nick and Eddie looked at each other. Ikey's parents had passed away years ago and they had no idea where his brother lived. "I don't think he has anyone that he kept in contact with." Eddie said.

"Ok well Hannah and I will stay here and you two go get cleaned up and get something to eat and come back. You have been working all day and we don't need anymore casualties right now. You can' do anything for him right now anyway so go." Janet said sternly

"Janet…" eddie started to say

"Eddie…don't even start with me…go." Janet said.

Nick looked at Eddie and smiled. "Do you want us to bring you two anything?" Nick said

"No we are fine and if something happens here we will call you but right now we have a long road ahead so just go now and come back when you are ready." Janet said more compassionately this time.

Eddie walked over to Janet and hugged her so tightly, "I love you so much" he whispered in her ear.

"I know babe." Janet kissed him gently on the lips and then they parted.

"Why did you send them away Janet? What is going on?" Hannah knew Janet well enough to know something was wrong.

Janet looked at Hannah. She had to tell someone what was happening. "I figured I couldn't get it past you. Ikey is in really bad shape. The doctors think he may have brain damage and possibly be paralyzed. They won't know until after the scans are completed. The insurance isn't going to cover all of this so I am going to cover the rest with the money that Dwayne gave me." Janet said looking at Hannah.

Hannah was stunned. She knew it must be bad but she had no idea that it would be this bad. She knew that this type of injury would wipe out BFW and what Janet was doing was saving their business. Hannah just hugged Janet in that moment. She knew that this decision would eventually come out and Eddie may not like it or Nick for that matter but by then the money will be gone. She could not have been prouder of Janet in that moment. She always knew that Janet was a one of a kind friend but she had no idea how amazing she really was until that moment.

"Now let's go get some coffee, I have a feeling we are going to be here for a bit." Janet said trying to lighten the moment.

"Janet I know what you are doing and I just want to say Thank you. Dwayne would be so proud of you. In a way you saved a part of him before he passed away and now his gift is going to give someone else's life. You are one amazing woman you know that." Hannah said with tears in her eyes.

Janet looked up slightly at the mention of Dwayne (as if she were looking into Heaven). He was such an amazing man and he would be pleased to know that his money went to help someone else but what Hannah didn't realize is that she didn't save him he saved her and in a way her relationship with Eddie. He gave Janet the greatest gift that she had ever received before that point in her life and that was the realization of who she was as a person. The lessons she learned in Hope and throughout her relationship with Dwayne made her see just who it was that stared back at her in the mirror something that she had never truly known before. She finally realized that she was an amazing and wonderful woman who deserved to be loved and give of her self without so much doubt. Without it, Janet would never have trusted herself enough to accept the love of a man as being real and true. Dwayne gave her the courage to open her heart to Eddie completely and thoroughly and let him in in a way that she never had before they broke up.

No, Janet thought, "I'm the one who was saved. I'm married to the man who truly is the love of my life and we are going to have a baby conceived out of that love. I would never have felt so happy and secure as I do now without his friendship and faith in me so this is my gift to you Dwayne to give that gift to someone else who has lost their way. We all deserve that second chance to see what is truly possible."

Janet and Hannah pulled away from one another with tears in their eyes. "You don't need to thank me Hannah, it is the right thing to do that is all." She said.

Hannah looked at her and smiled, "but you know Janet that this is saving me just as much because I am going to tell Nick how I feel and hope that he feels the same way. I want a future with him, Janet and it is about time I start acting like it." Hannah said with a new found sense of purpose.

"Yes it is" Janet said smiling just as much "yes it is."

With that the two women headed to the cafeteria for some much needed coffee for the long night ahead.


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40:

The car ride was quiet at first between Eddie and Nick. Both of them thinking and trying to figure out what happened today. Eddie thought about how his day started and how happy he was to have found the house and seeing Janet's face and how happy she was…how could things have gone so terribly wrong. Is Ikey going to recover? What is going to happen to the business if he has big medical expenses? They would have to pay all the bills as he was working but more importantly he was their friend. How would he support his now growing family? All these questions were circling around in his mind. Eddie just drove and seemed off in his own world trying to make sense of it all.

Nick sat there just as quietly. He had no idea what went wrong with the scaffolding. How could Ikey have gotten hurt? Did he do something wrong? How would they finish the job and be there for Ikey…it was a small company it wasn't like there was someone else to do the work. Nick sat there just trying to figure out what to say or do and maybe for the first time in his life he had absolutely nothing to say.

Eddie pulled up to Nick's house and stopped the truck. "I'm going to run home and shower and change. I'll be back to pick ya up in about a half an hour, Ok?" Eddie said finally looking at Nick.

"Sounds good, maybe we can stop at Murph's and pick up sandwiches for Janet and Hannah too on our way back to the hospital as I am sure they haven't thought about eating." Nick said.

"Good Idea Nicky, see ya in a few" Eddie said patting Nick's shoulder a bit. Nick got out of the truck and Eddie drove off.

Eddie arrived home and walked into the house. He looked around almost in a daze trying to figure out the answers to even some of his questions. Right now he should be worried more about Ikey but all he could think of was his child. Would there even be a business left when this was over? How would he support his family? Would they be able to move after all? So many questions, he sat on the edge of the bed and held his head in his hands and let the tears finally come.

Soon they were walking back into the hospital with sandwiches in hand. Eddie had texted Janet earlier to see what sandwich she and Hannah wanted. Janet hadn't realized just how hungry she was until she saw his text message. They all sat in the waiting area eating their sandwiches in relative silence. Finally Janet decided to talk about the elephant in the room.

"There is something I need to tell you both and I don't want you to be angry but there is also nothing you can do about it now so you will need to find some way to come to terms with it." Janet said looking at Nick and Eddie.

Eddie and Nick both looked at Janet like she was talking in a foreign language or something. "What are you talking about babe?" Eddie said

"We don't know the extent of the injuries but we will once he has all the tests. Regardless if they are severe or minor the testing is going to be expensive and I know that the insurance you have is not going to pay all of it. I also know that your business would not handle this kind of claim so I talked to the doctor and due to the fact that Ikey has no family I am paying his medical expenses over and above what the insurance doesn't cover so it won't effect the business." Janet said with a slight sign of relief that she got it out.

Eddie and Nick both looked at each other stunned. Before either one of them could speak Janet continued, "now I can tell by the looks on your faces so just save the speeches or any other non sense that you are prepared to say to me. It is done so lets just focus on Ikey and getting him better." Janet said matter of factly just as the doctor came through the doors.

Janet got up quickly and walked over to the doctor. "So how is he?" she said hurriedly

"He has bleeding on his brain in which we will need to go in surgically and relieve the pressure. His spine is intact with no visible fractures so he is one lucky guy there. He has several broken ribs, his left arm is broken in 4 places and he has a fractured collarbone. It looks like his upper body took the brunt of the fall. He will need surgery to fix the fractures and we will need to insert metal pins in several of the places in his arm where the brakes are. He has a long road ahead for recovery that is if he survives the surgery to his head and the bleeding and swelling stops in his brain he should be just fine. The next 48 hours will be crucial. Since you are taking financial responsibility for him I am going to have you sign the consent forms for the surgeries and you will be considered his legal guardian for the time being until our hospital attorney can give you the papers to take legal responsibility for him in the morning." The doctor said to Janet

"Ok, where do I sign?" Janet said while Nick and Eddie jumped up and walked rapidly over to Janet.

"Hey we need to talk about this Janet…this is our responsibility." Nick said

"Perhaps you didn't hear me from our conversation 5 minutes ago, it isn't up for discussion. It is done so just sit back down and relax because it will be a long night waiting for him to come out of surgery." Janet said glaring at Nick clearly not willing to budge.

Eddie stood there as if he was unable to speak. He kept looking at Janet not understanding exactly what she was doing and why. On one hand he loved her so much for looking out for their business that way and knew the sacrifice and what it would mean to BFW but on the other hand he was somewhat angry with her for making this large of a decision without talking to him first. They were married after all and this was a lot of money potentially.

The doctor disappeared back through the doors once Janet had signed all the papers. Eddie looked at Janet and she knew the dam was about to break. Hannah got up knowing that look and said, "Nick can you walk with me a bit. I have some stuff I need to talk to you about and I could really use some fresh air right now." Hannah glanced at Janet and the two of them shared a "thank you" look. Moments later Hannah and Nick were out the doors and left Eddie and Janet facing off in the waiting area.

"Janet I can not believe that you would make this type of decision without talking to me first. WE ARE MARRIED…did you conveniently forget that? Or are you purposely doing what you want because you don't care what my opinion is?" Eddie said getting upset at his wife for the first time since they got married.

"Eddie, listen, I know that we are married and I understand why you are angry with me but I can not sit here and let something happen to the business that you both created and built when I have the means to take care of it. Dwayne left me that money Eddie to help me and my future and in a way it would be because it will take the burden off of you and Nick…do you understand Eddie why I am doing this? I can't think of a better way to honor Dwayne and who he was then to help someone else." She said hoping that that would be enough.

Eddie looked at her and cringed just a bit. Despite all that had happened between them, their reconciliation and their wedding and now their baby he couldn't help but still feel a sense of hurt that Janet was able to fall in love with someone else while they were apart, regardless of whether it was short lived and that he may not have been her true love, it still stung. Not to mention the large sum of money that he left her, something that Eddie would never be able to provide. He knew that her heart was in the right place and that she was right about it affecting the business if they had to cover those expenses – it could potentially bankrupt BFW but why would she go behind his back? It just wasn't sitting right with him, at all.

Janet looked at Eddie and knew he was upset. She understood to a point why but really who was there when the decision needed to be made? Who was there when Ikey was laying there all broken and battered. She could not look into his face and not feel like someone needed to speak for him and help him any way that they could. Janet always felt a sort of kinship with Ikey due to their very similar indiscretions. Ikey was kind to her even when he found out what she had done to Eddie. Perhaps he could understand where she was coming from more than anyone else since his affair with Allison became public knowledge. But there was something else, a sense of empathy for Ikey as he was alone in this world and there really was no one but them to hold his hand and help him through this. She just needed Eddie to understand that, but how?

Janet thought of a way to make Eddie understand a bit but she knew it would hurt a little. "Eddie, Ikey doesn't have anyone in his life and when he came in here he needed someone to step up and take responsibility for him. He needed someone to say 'he belongs to us'. Eddie I couldn't look at him in that bruised and swelling face and not take responsibility. I have the means and honestly he reminded me of Dwayne being alone and sick but having no one in life to help him or to lean on. It makes me sad to think had I not been there would Dwayne have died alone, probably. I don't want that to be Ikey, Eddie. I don't want him to ever feel like he has no one because he is a part of our family like it or not. You two have been friends since you were so young, you can't tell me if you were here in my place you would have done anything differently. I know that I should have talked to you before I made this commitment but somewhere in my mind and my heart I knew you would support me because it was the right thing to do." Janet said and she stepped closer to Eddie trying to gauge if he was understanding her and relenting a bit. She reached for his face with her hands and she could see the tears in his eyes. As she placed her hands on his cheeks his hands came up and covered hers. This simple gesture let her know that he understood her and like it or not would support her.

Nick and Hannah had been walking for a bit just idly chatting about Sam and the accident. Hannah needed to get the nerve up to talk to Nick about how she felt. Finally she just blurted out, "Nick, I need to talk to you! Today when I came into the emergency room all I could think of was what if it was you. What if you were the one laying there and may not regain consciousness. What if you were the one that would never see my cry or hear me tell you that I was in love with you or that I wanted a future with you or that you are Sam's real father…" she said the last part a little more quietly.

"WHAT?" Nick said. Stunned, he said, "you are telling me now that Ikey is possibly dying in the hospital to tell me that Sam is my son…unbelievable Hannah!" Nick practically shouted.

"I can't believe you are going to make this about you? I can't believe that all you can think of is yourself during this time." Nick was just upset and angry as he had been trying to get Hannah to talk about all of these things months before.

"You know what? Right now I need to just be on my own…away from YOU!" Nick said storming off.

Hannah stood there completely stunned…as if her mind caught up with her heart her eyes began to stream the largest tears. As they ran down her face she felt as though she had missed her opportunity months ago and he was right her timing was selfish and crappy. "When are you ever going to learn Hannah" she thought to herself as she stood alone on the middle of a side walk, in the middle of a street both of which she had no idea of. Much like her past she felt so lost as if there was not a single person that could point her in the right direction, how could they when even she had no idea of where to go next.


	41. Chapter 41

**(I don't own any of the characters but I love em!)**

Chapter 41:

Hannah walked back into the waiting area with tears streaming down her face. She didn't seem to have a purpose just walked aimlessly it seemed. Janet looked up when she heard the doors open and saw Hannah immediately she knew something went very wrong.

Janet got up and walked over to Hannah. "What happened? Did you talk to Nick about how you felt?" Janet said trying to look into Hannah's eyes but Hannah was just staring at the floor.

"Yeah and about Sam, he is very mad at me right now. He said that this wasn't the time to tell him. How could I have been so stupid Janet? With Ikey laying there not knowing if he will be ok and I tell him about his son and about how I feel…he's right I am a horribly insensitive person. I just thought since all this happened it just became clear to me what I wanted and I thought maybe he might feel the same way…I don't know." Hannah said quietly.

"Just give him some time ok? He is just dealing with a lot of emotions right now…it will be ok Hannah truly it will." Janet said reassuringly

"You don't know that Janet. I think I am just going to go home and see Sam. Give me a call and let me know how Ikey is doing ok? Regardless of what Nick said I do care and what to make sure he is ok." Hannah said turning and leaving before Janet could respond.

Janet watched as Hannah walked out the door and her heart broke for her. She knew exactly what it felt like to feel like you made such a mistake and if you could take it back you would give anything to do it. Keeping Sam's dad a secret for all this time probably seemed like a good decision at the time but Janet knew that secret's destroy so she has tried to live her life with out them, one of the main reasons she told Eddie right away about her mistake with Rooster. It hurt but in the end she knew she couldn't live with it. Her heart told her that once Nick thought about it and calmed down he and Hannah would be able to have a conversation about it but right now they both just needed some time to think.

Janet returned to her spot in the waiting area. Eddie had needed to "take a walk" after their conversation which Janet knew meant he was still angry but trying to deal with it. She knew she probably should have talked to him about it before she committed to it but at the time when she saw Ikey's face and realized how devastating his injuries were she knew it was the right thing to do and she was hoping that Eddie would understand in time but right now he just wasn't seeing it the same way. Eddie was prideful and did not like her "rescuing" him which is how he saw it just like when Nick started BFW's when Eddie's landscaping business started to fail because of Ray. In time he came around and she hoped the same would happen with her because now it wasn't just about Janet and Eddie, they had a baby to think about too.

The doctor came through the door and brought Janet out of her thoughts. "Mrs. Latekka" the doctor said. Janet's heart still skipped a beat or two when she heard herself being called by her married name. It was still somewhat new and took some getting used to but she loved it.

"I'm here, so how is Ikey?" Janet said walking over to the doctor.

"He is out of surgery and we were able to repair all the broken bones and relieve the pressure in his brain. He is going to be in a lot of pain for a while but if everything keeps going the way it has been he should be ok but we still need to get through these next few days to make sure. I will let you know when he wakes up but things are looking as good as they can for his injuries. He is one lucky man." The doctor said and turned to leave.

"Thanks for all you've done doctor. We'll be here when he wakes up ok." Janet said

"Ok then" and with that the doctor was gone.

Janet turned and smiled a bit to herself. She was truly happy that he made it through all the surgeries ok but she was getting very tired. It was nearly morning at this point and she had been sitting in this room for what seemed like days. She wanted to go home and sleep but didn't want to leave Ikey in case he woke up. She sat back down in the chair and started to rub her belly. She decided since she was alone in the waiting area that she would have a little conversation with her child.

"Hey in there. It's your momma, wow that is strange to say I'm your mommy. I can't wait to see you next week. The doctor is going to give mommy and daddy a peek at ya so make sure you smile big for us and let us see if you are a boy or a girl. Something tells me though that you are a boy because you are so strong for surviving all the things that have happened so far. I know that you are going to be beautiful and just so you know you are loved so much already I hope you know that and can feel that. I am so happy that you are there. You may have been a surprise but it is the best surprise I have ever gotten. You will be hearing from me a lot while you're in there so be prepared. Your daddy loves you too so much but right now he is upset with me, but don't worry because we love each other so much that we will make it through all of this. Your uncle Ikey is just really hurt right now but he will start to feel better and someday you will meet him – just don't listen to too much of what he says ok." She laughs a little "Daddy just wants what is best for everyone that is all, especially his family because he does have a heart of gold. You are really lucky to have such an amazing daddy. " Janet was looking at her belly and talking quietly out loud she didn't see Eddie walk back into the waiting room. He saw right away what she was doing and it truly made his heart melt. She was right, he wasn't as upset with her as he was for what she was trying to do. She was trying to help him and his business from having to pay all these medical bills and keep BFW's from suffering. After all that money was given to her from Dwayne and as much as that whole relationship bothered him on some level how could he be upset that she was using it for him, Nick and Ikey really.

As he stood there listening to her and the things she was telling their unborn child about him he couldn't help but fall in love with her all over again. The emotion and what she was saying he didn't think anyone other than her had ever felt about him before and now hearing her tell their child all these things he felt like the luckiest man on the planet. At the end of day, all he cared about was his family and his friends so nothing else should matter not certainly money used to help them all.

Eddie slowly began to walk up to Janet and she suddenly looked up. She had a few tears just swirling around in her eyes and his heart twisted just a bit. He certainly didn't mean to make her feel so badly. He suddenly felt like crap that he reacted the way he did.

Eddie knelt down so he was facing Janet and he was slightly in between her knees. She placed her hands on his face and he placed his hands on her belly. He leaned forward and kissed her belly and held himself there for a second or two. "Your mommy is right and very smart might I add. I love you both so much and I just want you to know that no matter what happens in this life I will always be here for you both to protect you and support you so you be good to mommy in there and we will see you very soon ok slugger." Eddie said and suddenly he had this strange look on his face and looked up at Janet and she had the same strange look. They both looked at each other and then at her belly. It seems the baby enjoyed the talk from both of it's parents because the baby moved and both of them could feel it. It was a small movement but enough that Eddie could feel it with his hands still placed on her belly and she could feel the movement on the inside.

"I think our baby just moved…" Janet said to Eddie with tears once again in her eyes but these tears were definitely joyful tears. "I think you are right. That was amazing Janet. I can't believe we got to feel that together. " Eddie said then leaned forward and kissed Janet a very passionate kiss.

Once they broke apart, Eddie said, "Janet I am sorry for the way I reacted before. I know that you were doing what you thought was best and I do appreciate your thoughtfulness I do but in the future these are things we need to talk about even if it is an emergency ok? I love you so much and I would do anything to keep us safe and I know that it is going to take a bit of time but the company is going to reimburse you for the money that you pay for Ikey. It is our responsibility as a company and there is no discussion about that so that we are clear." He said looking at Janet directly in her eyes.

"Ok, we are clear. I love you too" is all Janet said.

Eddie smiled that big smile knowing that Janet was respecting him on a number of different levels and it made him feel so much more like the man he wanted to be. He knew that whatever he wanted to accomplish in his life that he would be able to do it with Janet by his side. Suddenly he looked at Janet's face and realized that they had been in that waiting area for almost 24 hours.

"You should probably go home babe, you have been here for a long time and it isn't good for you to not get the rest you need." Eddie was concerned

"The doctor said that Ikey was out of surgery but he hasn't regained consciousness yet. We should be here when he does." Janet said

"Let me go and talk with the doctor and see what is happening with him now." Eddie said getting up and going over to the nurses desk.

After about 10 minutes, Eddie returned and said to Janet, "Listen, the nurse said that he is going to probably out for quite a while. They have him on some serious pain medications due to the extent of his injuries so why don't we go home and get some rest and we'll come back later on and check on him. The nurse said if he does awake we would have plenty of time to get here and talk with him before he totally came out of the anesthetic so what do you say we go home Mrs. Latekka." He said with a grin.

Janet was exhausted and nothing would make her happier than to go home and sleep but there was that part of her that thought she should stay. Just then she felt that movement again and she thought "apparently there are two votes to sleep to I guess I am outnumbered."

"Ok Eddie, you are right I am exhausted. Let's go home." Janet said.

As they lay together in their bed, Eddie and Janet were wrapped in each others arms. They had showered together before getting ready for bed since they had been in that hospital for so long they just felt a shower would be needed. There was nothing sexual about it just a lot of touching and caressing of each other and a connection that had grown stronger. The conversation they had with their baby and his or her movement just reinforced this bond that the three of them shared that made them feel for the first time since they found out about their baby that they truly were a family. They got out of the shower, Eddie just put on some boxers and Janet in just one of Eddie's old Tshirts and her underwear and they curled up with each other in bed. Nothing was said because nothing needed to be communicated through words. As they drift off to sleep they both thought about the ultrasound and the experience of seeing there baby for the first time. Suddenly as if they were both thinking it and decided to say it out loud they said…"let's find out!" Janet and Eddie just looked at each other and laughed. "Ok then next week we meet our son or daughter." Eddie said. "Ok" Janet said and seconds later both of their eyes were closed and off to sleep they went dreaming of their baby.

**(Thanks so much for reading the story – I hope you are enjoying it! I would love to hear what you think so please review! Thanks!)**


	42. Chapter 42

Chapter 42:

Eddie and Janet were snuggled in together as the sun rose for the day. They were completely exhausted and managed to sleep in until nearly noon the following day. The emotions and stress of the previous 48 hours had taken its toll on them both. As Janet began to move around Eddie began to awaken as well. Soon Janet realized what had brought her out of her sleep, she had to go to the bathroom really bad – a fact she would soon realize would become a part of her everyday life as a pregnant soon to be mom. She made it just in time in the bathroom so all crisis's were averted but she had to laugh at herself and how much she realized her body was changing. She lingered a bit in the bathroom and stared at herself in the mirror. Her belly was definitely changing. She had never been a thin person but her belly was more round and hard then it ever had been. It seemed none of her other features had changed much other than her belly and one more notiable feature…one that she was sure Eddie would appreciate. She was not the curviest of woman in the chest area but she had to admit to herself that she was definitely "filling out" in that area as well. As she stared at herself the baby within her began to wake up too it seemed as she or he began to do sommersaults or flips or something in there that made Janet smile. Since the first time she felt that feeling of butterflies in her belly she could not get enough of it. She knew that her appointment was merely a few days away when they would be able to find out what the baby was but every fiber of her being was telling her the little gymnast in her belly was a boy. She began to picture what her son would look like with both of their features. She smiled to herself thinking of all the times she would see Eddie and his son playing ball or wrestling around the living room. She knew that she should really appreciate this time but there was still a part of her that wanted the baby to be ready now so they could hold their baby conceived out of so much love and begin their life together as a family. She knew it would happen it just would take some time. In the meantime she decided she would enjoy having Eddie all to herself. As she turned to go back to the bedroom she found Eddie once again staring back at her with this smile on his face – bigger than she had ever seen it. She knew he was thinking the same things as she.

Eddie had gotten up to go find Janet as he moved and found her missing. He saw the door was slightly closed so he figured she was in the bathroom. When he got to the door he saw her staring at herself in the mirror…something he had not seen her doing much of in their entire relationship but she had this smile on her face – one he had only seen when she spoke of their baby. He was mesmerized by this woman standing in front of him. She was marveling in her growing belly and enjoying her body most likely for the first time in her life. Truth be told he was so attracted to her before but there was something about her now with life growing inside of her it made him want her so much more. He had to admit that she was developing some very nice features from this pregnancy as well…namely his favorite part of her and that was her chest. Everyday he noticed something else changing on her and he loved every bit of it. She seemed so comfortable in her skin now more so than ever before. Their shower together the night before was the most amazing experience he had ever had with a woman because it was so personal and sensual but yet not about sex at all. The connection that they both had now was one that he just couldn't describe but was so entirely happy about. He knew that no matter what came his way as long as Janet was by his side he could do anything. He knew right from the start that Janet was the one…the one who would change him for the better…the one who would make his life noteworthy…the one that he would not want to live with out. Janet had always been the one but Eddie was scared of those feelings from the start, however standing here today watching her as she caressed her belly with their son or daughter growing inside of her he could not have been more calm and reassured that he had finally reached the point in his life where he was truly happy with every aspect of it and he was no longer afraid of anything. Not even what was happening with Ikey because he knew somehow that even Ikey would get to that point in his life where he would be just as happy as Eddie was at this very moment. So lost in his thoughts Eddie didn't realize that Janet had caught on to his staring at her and was now walking towards him.

Janet walked right up to Eddie and put her hands on his face. With this gesture, Eddie snapped out of his thoughts and turned all of his attention to his wife. He reached his arms around her waist and pulled her to him and they kissed passionately for what seemed like hours but it was only minutes. Janet smiled when they parted and said, "well good morning to you too Mr. Latekka…how long were you standing there?"

Eddie smiled and said, "I don't know you looked so beautiful standing there rubbing your belly and staring at our baby that I lost all track of time."

Janet smiled at the thought and oddly wasn't at all upset that he saw her admiring herself the way she was. Perhaps for the first time in her life she was very happy with how her body was changing and knew that Eddie loved it too. "what do you say that we go back to bed for a while." She said with a wink and as she started to walk away she ran her hand down Eddie's face…

Eddie got the biggest grin, "Now that's what I'm talking about" He quickly caught up to her and they both stood before one another staring in to each others eyes for a moment and spent the rest of the morning into mid afternoon enjoying each other slowing and purposefully knowing that there was no where else they would rather be.

Janet woke up and looked at the clock – it was nearly 2 o'clock in the afternoon. She could not believe that they were both still in bed. They needed the rest that was for sure but this mornings activities was purely for them. She thought she should call the hospital to see if Ikey had woked up yet. She got out of bed slowly as not to wake Eddie. He was still so peacefully sleeping she just didn't have the heart to wake him.

She walked to the kitchen and grabbed her cell phone. She called the hospital and was transferred to the unit that Ikey was assigned. The nurse picked up the call and told Janet that there had been no change in Ikey's condition. He was still asleep but his vitals were stable and the doctor had prescribed him some heavy pain medications due to the severity of his injuries so they had not expected him to stir for quite some time. She assured Janet that the minute that he awoke she would be contacted by the nursing staff at the hospital. Janet thanked the nurse and decided to call Hannah and check in.

"Hey how are you doing this morning?" Janet asked when Hannah answered the phone.

"Well I think I have made an entirely huge mess of my life…how is your morning going?" Hannah said with a sign

"What do you mean? Did you talk to Nick again since we last talked?" Janet asked with concern

"NO that is just it. He isn't answering his phone, he hasn't returned any of my messages and even his dad answers the phone at home and says he isn't there…I get that he is upset with me but he has now just decided to completely withdraw me from his life? And what about Sam?" Hannah said almost in tears

"Honey, he just needs some time to think about all of it. Just give him the space he needs and I guarantee he will come around to talk. I know that he won't shut you out of his life or Sam…he is his son Hannah it's just a lot for him to deal with right now especially with Ikey getting hurt on that job." Janet said trying to reassure her.

"I know that you are right Janet it's just that I am worried that I messed up big time and it's too late to even think that he could possibly still have feelings for me especially because I kept Sam a secret for so long and once he came back to the Ridge…he may never forgive me for that?" Hannah said quietly.

"The one thing I can say with personal experience Hannah and that is given enough time all can be forgiven…I'll be home if you need anything, OK?" Janet said

"Ok Janet, well I've got to get going I have to get Sam to school…we'll talk some more later." Hannah said just before she hung up.

"Ok Hannah" Janet said. She hung up her phone and realized that the coffee was done that she had started while talking to the nurse. She made herself a cup and stood at the kitchen window staring out of it thinking about Hannah and Nick. She took sip after sip of her coffee trying to understand both view points and hoping that Nick would come around at some point. She could understand why he was so upset but why waste any more time knowing that Sam is his son. Life was just too short and precious to stay angry over something that you can not change. Nick should understand that especially in light of what was happening with Ikey. Just as the thoughts were racing there her mind her cell phone rang. She answered it quickly, "Hello?" she said not knowing who had called.

"Mrs. Latekka? This is Nurse Wellington, I wanted to let you know that Mr. Eichorn is beginning to wake up if you want to come and see him." The nurse reported.

"Oh, yes we will be right there…thank you so much for calling." Janet said quickly snapped her phone shut and turned to go get dressed.

Janet walked quickly in her bedroom to find Eddie still sleeping. She jumped up on the bed and tried to wake up Eddie.

Eddie rolled over slowly and grabbed Janet down to him. He kissed her deeply and said, "apparently I didn't make a lasting impression." He said smiling.

"EDDIE! Could you stop thinking about that for one minute? The hospital called and Ikey is awake, we need to go." Janet said somewhat laughing but really trying to get off the bed to get dressed. Due to her belly it was a little harder to move around as she once did.

"Oh…ok…Yeah, lets get going." Eddie said a little more awake now.

About 25 minutes later Eddie and Janet were walking into the hospital and onto the unit that Ikey was assigned. As they approached his room, Janet slowed down and looked at Eddie. "Eddie, I want you to prepare yourself for what you are going to see. He sustained a head injury and his face is very swollen and bruised. I saw his face already but you haven't so please just prepare yourself." Janet said trying to make Eddie understand without upsetting him.

"Ok, Janet." Eddie said somewhat annoyed.

As they walked into the room, they could see Ikey laying there somewhat looking around with nurses checking his vitals and adjusting his medications. Janet was the first one to approach his side. "Hey Ikey it's Janet…how are you feeling?" Janet said soothingly.

Ikey looked at her and tried to smile. He didn't say anything at first as if he had some difficulty talking. Eddie spoke than, "Hey buddy, how ya doing?" he said.

Ikey looked over her and up to Eddie. His smile disappeared. He spoke very softly, "Janet…" "Yeah Ikey it's me…how are you feeling?" Janet said softly

"I don't know what happened…where am I?" Ikey said slowly

"You are in the hospital…you fell off the scaffolding at work…do you remember anything?' Janet said

"Not really…where was I working?" Ikey said looking very confused.

"You were working with me and Nick…remember…the windows…" Eddie said

Ikey looked slowly at Eddie and was silent for a moment. He then said, "Who is Nick? Who are you?"

Eddie and Janet looked at each other, they clearly weren't expecting that response especially since he knew who Janet was.

"Ikey, we've been friends since we were kids, you don't remember?" Eddie said getting upset

Ikey looked at Janet and then at Eddie. "I don't know who you are?" Ikey said questioningly

"Do you remember how you know me, Ikey?" Janet said hoping that would jog his memory.

"Yeah you're my girlfriend right?" Ikey said


	43. Chapter 43

Chapter 43:

"WHAT?" Eddie said not believing what he just heard

Janet just looked as though someone had drained all the blood from her body. She looked at Ikey not knowing what to say. Clearly something was wrong with his memory but they had always been friends…not good ones but he had been nice to her when she worked at Sully's…why would he think they were dating?

Eddie was trying very hard to keep it together but the fact that Janet wasn't saying anything was really bothering him.

"Ikey, why do you think I am your girlfriend?" Janet said quietly ignoring Eddie knowing that he was probably really upset.

Ikey looked at her and was silent for a minute then spoke. "I remember you sitting by my bed side and holding my hand. You said that you were sorry that this happened to me. I remember the doctor asking you who was responsible for me and you said 'Me'…I thought you were my girlfriend…so your not?" he clearly looked sad.

"No Ikey I'm not. I am married to Eddie. He is your best friend and you work with him and Nick at Best Friend Windows. You were wearing Eddie's shirt when you came into the hospital so they thought that you were Eddie which is why they brought me back here. When I saw it was you I wanted you to know that you weren't alone. Do you understand now Ikey." Janet said hoping this would help Eddie as well as Ikey.

"I don't know Janet…I remember you but I don't remember him." Ikey said looking at Eddie.

"He needs his rest so why don't you come back tomorrow and you can talk some more ok?" the nurse said suddenly

"Ok, we'll come back and see you tomorrow Ikey, Ok?" Janet asked.

"Ok" Ikey said and quickly was off to sleep after the nurse gave him another dose of his pain medication

Eddie had walked out of the room before Janet had even been able to stop him. He didn't know why he was so bothered by Ikey's statement. Was it because he had cheated with Allison and was now attempting to 'bond' with Janet? Eddie's thoughts were racing a bit. He knew that Janet had nothing to do with it but at the same time he couldn't help but notice how she focused her attention totally on Ikey when he made the statement and not on him.

Janet found Eddie outside in the garden area sitting on a bench. He was visibly upset. She walked up to him and said, "Why are you so upset? He has a head injury Eddie it's not like this is a surprise that his memories are mixed up. The doctor said this may happen."

"He shouldn't have a memory of you being his girlfriend Janet and you didn't exactly correct him right away did you?" Eddie said knowing that the things that were coming out of his mouth were ridiculous but they were coming out anyway.

"Are you serious Eddie? The man fell off of the scaffolding and had massage injuries and surgeries by the way and you are upset because he called me his girlfriend. I am your WIFE Eddie show some compassion for IKEY instead of yourself…UUUGGHH I can not believe I am having this conversation with you. I am going to go for a walk because I need to be away from you right now." Janet said as she turned to leave.

"Janet WAIT! I'm sorry I know that what I just said sounds ridiculous but it was just hard to hear him say that about my wife. It just got to me I guess." Eddie said trying to make her stop.

"Eddie you seriously need to let that go, you told me you had. I am trying to help out your friend and a person who needs to have some support right now. He doesn't remember you but he does remember me and if that is what it takes for a while to help him to get his memory back than that is what I am prepared to do and I don't want to have to worry about you overreacting every time we talk or go to see him. I'll just see you later." With that Janet walked off.

Eddie sat there and was trying to figure out what just happened. He had forgiven Janet for her sleeping with Rooster but there was something about hearing Ikey say that that brought something back in Eddie. He was upset with himself for getting upset with Janet but he was also a little upset with Janet for sticking up for Ikey that way. He was her husband and she should be standing by him not Ikey. He decided to give her some space and he would talk about it with her when she got home.

Janet walked off and was fuming about the interaction she just had with Eddie. How could he react that way? Can't he understand that Ikey doesn't have his true memory right now and that in order to help him he needed support and caring. Honestly, she is Eddie's wife that isn't going to change just because Ikey made a statement and she corrected him for God's sake. What is really going on with him? She had so many thoughts running through her head that when she felt it she stopped dead in her tracks. She had a sharp pain that was felt in the heart of her belly. At first she thought that she was just upset and walking to fast but when she stopped the pain got worse. It felt like someone had punched her right in the stomach. The pain continued to grow in it's intensity and she dropped to the ground. She grabbed her cell phone and called 911. Frantically she screamed into the phone when the operator answered that she needed help for her baby. They worked to try and find her location but Janet was growing hysterical. She began sobbing loudly and the operator was having a difficult time making out what she said or what her name even was. Luckily a familiar noise happened in the background that gave the operator a location of what street she most likely was located on. She sent out an ambulance with the direction of looking for a female who was most likely with child or pregnant on the ground. The ambulance drivers saw Janet on the ground grabbing her belly and visibly upset. They rushed to her and she tried to describe what was happening. They asked who they could call and she said that Eddie Latekka was her husband. It was the last thing that Janet remembered before she passed out.

Eddie ran into the emergency room looking for a nurse trying to understand what had happened. He received a phone call from an ambulance driver saying that Janet was on her way to the hospital with abdominal pain. All he could think of was what happened? He felt so badly for their fight earlier and just wanted to hold his wife and now all he could think of was what if something is wrong with her or the baby. He found a nurse and they lead him to the maternity ward where they had taken Janet to monitor the baby and find out what happened.

Janet lay in the bed with monitors and wires connecting her and her baby to the monitors surrounding her. She didn't know what had happened. Where did those pains come from? Was her baby ok? Where was Eddie? She was so scared and all she wanted was her husband.

Moments later Eddie came walking into Janet's room and walked directly to her bed. They both said, "I'm sorry" at the same time. Eddie grabbed Janet and hugged her and pulled back and kissed her several times on the lips. "What happened Janet?" Eddie said with tears in his eyes.

"I was walking and all of the sudden I had these sharp pains and suddenly I was on the ground and the ambulance came and I passed out until I got here." Janet said so quickly with tears streaming down her face.

"Babe please just calm down. What did the doctor say?" Eddie said rubbing the tears away from her cheek with his thumbs.

"They just hooked me up to all these monitors and said that I have to be monitored for a while and the baby…" Janet said

"What about the baby?" Eddie said more frightened than he had ever been.

"The baby…they want me to stay here for a while to monitor the baby." Janet said

"Ok well we will do whatever they say ok – no argument." Eddie said sternly

"I'm sorry Eddie. I was just trying to help Ikey. Someone has to be there for him I didn't know he would say that." Janet said looking down still crying

"Janet please don't cry. I know you were only trying to help and I'm sorry that I reacted that way but you are my wife and we are a family and I am not going to apologize for wanting everyone to know that. I guess when he said that it just reminded me of a time in my life when things were very wrong like when Ikey had the affair with Allison and you were gone. I could not imagine my life being like that again and I don't want Ikey to think in any way that you are someone that you are not – regardless of what his memory is. I just didn't handle it well that's all." Eddie said.

Janet looked up at him and just felt horrible for being so upset. It was as if her emotions got away from her and she went into this emotional talespin that she couldn't control.

"Janet I know that you have all these emotions and hormones and all that going on right now…I remember what Hannah was like when she was pregnant with Sam so please don't feel badly – it was just a misunderstand but for now Ikey is on his own until we can get you and the baby stable and under control ok?" Eddie said grabbing her hand and placing it in his.

"I love you so much you know that." Janet said so lovingly.

"I know." Eddie said taking a sit in the chair next to her bed.

"Speaking of Hannah have you talked to her and figured out what is happening with Nick?" Eddie said trying to get her mind off of Ikey and the stress.

"Yeah, I talked to her this morning. He still hasn't talked to her. She is pretty upset that she messed everything up for good. I told her to give him some time. Everything can be forgiven if given enough time." Janet said rubbing her belly.

Eddie sat there. He didn't respond right away. His thoughts had wondered back to when Janet confessed her night with Rooster and when he felt the first time that he had truly forgiven her…when she was already gone. He thought about how he could have handled that situation differently. He also thought about his night with Hannah. The night that no one knew of…the night that called into question whether or not Sam was his son. Would she be upset if she knew what he had done to his own best friend in particular knowing how horribly he treated her when she confessed her night with Rooster? No, now was not the time to tell her knowing that something was going on with her stress and the baby but at some point he would have to tell both her and Nick. Hannah and Eddie needed to fess up to what they had done to put it all out there. He promised Janet that he would be honest and this was the only thing that still hung over his head as the secret that no one knew accept him and Hannah. Right now though he had to focus on the baby and making sure that his family was safe and healthy.

The doctor walked in just then before Eddie had the chance to respond. Janet thought it was a bit strange that Eddie didn't say anything when she talked about forgiveness. She didn't want to make something out of nothing but she felt that something was there and that something was starting to worry her. Right now though it would have to wait because the baby was more important than anything to her and she knew Eddie felt the same.

The doctor said, "lets take a look at the baby and see what is going on in there." He lifted Janet's gown and put the jelly on her belly so he could see the baby with the ultrasound machine. As the doctor moved the wand around her belly, Janet and Eddie had their eyes focused on the monitor to see if the baby was still moving and growing and fine. The doctor kept moving it around until he was able to focus in on the baby and then moved it slowly to check everything out. As he did, they could all hear the heartbeat strong and that made Eddie and Janet breath a little easier. Than the doctor said, "Well everything looks fine. He is growing just fine. I am thinking that maybe you had what they call Braxton hicks contractions. Sometimes women experience them throughout their pregnancy and you are about 20 weeks along so it can start happening during this time. No need to be alarmed, it won't hurt the baby or you. They may come and go, most of the time physical activity brings them on so just take it easy for a couple of days and I think you will be just fine. This one is a fighter I can tell. I imagine that you feel a lot of movement in there. He seems very active." The doctor took the wand off her belly and gave her a towel to wipe off the jelly. He then said, "I don't see a need to keep you overnight but I do want you to go home and put your feet up and rest and relax for the rest of the evening. OK." The doctor then left the room.

Janet and Eddie sat there both in silence. They were so relieved but couldn't help but smile knowing that the doctor had inadvertently told them the sex of their baby. They were having a boy. Eddie just could not stop smiling and looking at Janet as though she was the most valuable thing in the world because to him she was. They were both relieved to know that the pain was a normal part of some women's pregnancy but Eddie also knew that the fight that they had brought it on. He should have been more strict about her taking on too much in her condition. Ikey was a stress she did not need. So he decided to take matters into his hands.

"Ok so the doctor said we can go home and that is exactly what we are going to do. Janet I know that you want to be there for Ikey but from now on Nick and I will help him as much as we can. You need to take care of yourself and our son. So you are going to go home and we are going to plant ourselves on the couch for a night of popcorn, a girly chick flick and some serious snuggling under a blanket…maybe a little more if you're lucky…" Eddie said lifting his eyebrow

Janet knew exactly what he was doing and she was more than happy to listen. He was right after all. Their baby was the most important thing to them and it was her responsibility to make sure their son was safe. Besides a little cuddling under the blanket with her handsome husband was just what the doctor ordered…literally.

"Ok babe, let's go home…oh and babe maybe I'll let you do a little more than snuggle under that blanket if you're lucky!" Janet said laughing a little and raising her eyebrow

Eddie laughed and thought to himself, "I am already the lucky one Janet" With that Janet got dressed and the three of them headed for home.


	44. Chapter 44

**(I don't own any of the characters but I love em!)**

Chapter 44:

As Janet and Eddie settled in for the night Eddie thought about the events of the day. Ever since Ikey had the accident it seemed like their lives were thrown into chaos mode. He wanted to just enjoy the fact that they had gotten married and are now having a boy. They found the house they wanted and would soon be able to move into it. He just wanted his life to return to some sort of normalcy but it seemed that the Gods just had different plans for them. At the moment he was very happy because Janet was snuggled up next to him and had almost immediately drifted off to sleep. She looked so peaceful when she slept, but there was something more about her today. He began to see her in a whole new light. She was the mother of his first born child, a son, a person he had yet to meet but loved with his whole heart. She looked so much more beautiful to him then she did before. Motherhood definitely seemed to agree with her, well up until today but he thought that maybe the contractions were brought on by their fight and her rather vigorous walk she left on. He just couldn't understand why he reacted that way to what Ikey said. The man had just woken up from having major surgery with several major injuries…why did he get so defensive and upset when Ikey made that statement. He knew in his heart that Janet was his, his wife, the mother of his child. She had never even dated Ikey so what was he so concerned about. He truly thought he had forgotten all about all that stuff from the past knowing how Janet feels about him and what was going on with her during that time he understood it completely now. Hell if he was being honest with himself, what he did with Hannah was the same thing…drunken emotional mistake. How was he going to tell Janet about it? How would he tell Nick? Would he be understanding especially after Eddie's reaction to Ikey's affair with Allison. He started to feel like the biggest hypocrite…all those hurtful things he said to Janet would she ever forgive him? He knew he had to tell her especially since Hannah was coming clean with Nick…it would all come out and quite frankly it should, it was time. All Eddie lay there and run his fingers through Janet's hair almost more smoothing for him then her he thought about what his life would have been like if he would have handled things differently with Janet right from the start. He should have been more attentive to her and let her know exactly what he was thinking and feeling, maybe none of this would have happened but in a crazy way the time and the distance they spent apart really made it very clear to Eddie what he wanted and that he wanted her. He was hoping that deep down that is how she felt too. As he sat and thought about all that had happened he realized that what had bothered him this morning was the relationship that she had with Dwayne. If he was being honest, he didn't understand how she could have moved on with someone else when he was so lost and couldn't picture himself with anyone else other than Janet. He realized that the money Dwayne left her that she was going to use towards Ikey's care and medical expenses, that somehow in his mind he connected the bad feelings of her moving on to the statement that Ikey made. Doesn't seem even rational now that he is thinking of it but at the time all he saw was red. Would he ever be truly able to move past the past and let it all go, because it seemed to him now that maybe he hasn't. How would he talk to her about this? Is it worth talking about? He was happy now but he didn't want another day to occur like this one so he thought he would have to just talk to her and tell her what he was thinking and feeling and pray that she understood. With that thought, he closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around his wife and child.

In the morning Janet was the first person awake because she had to go to the bathroom of course. She was getting used to the fact that she couldn't sleep as long as she once could due to her bladder. She finished in the bathroom and walked back into the bedroom. She was planning on going into the kitchen but as she walked past the bed a hand reached out and grabbed her and slowly moved her off the floor and into her place on the bed. She just laughed at Eddie. She loved his playfulness and the possibility for the closeness that was most certainly about to happen.

Eddie pretended like he was sleeping but he wasn't and when he saw his opportunity he took it. With her laying on her side facing him, Eddie decided to talk about what he was thinking. "Hey can we talk a bit?" he said looking serious. "Sure babe what goes on?" she said not sure what he was thinking. "I wanted to talk about what happened yesterday in Ikey's room…I think I may know why I overacted a bit but I don't want you to get upset about it because the only reason I am talking about it now is because I think it would help me to get it out and I promised you no secrets or hiding my feelings, ok?" he said looking directly in her eyes.

Janet looked at him a little strangely, she wasn't expecting this conversation. She thought they had worked it out yesterday but now that he spoke she realized that they really hadn't. "Ok, I'll listen to you but I can't promise you I won't be upset." She said honestly.

"Fair enough, I was thinking last night after you drifted off to sleep about why I reacted the way I did when Ikey called you his girlfriend and I realized that it wasn't about Ikey at all…it was more about how I felt about another man saying that you were his girlfriend. I know that I told you that I had worked through everything and forgiven you and forgotten about the past history stuff but I guess I haven't quite gotten there yet." He said hesitantly

Janet laid there frozen not quite believing what she just heard. Did he just say that he hadn't forgiven her just yet? She was completely taken off guard and her face clearly showed it.  
"Now before you get upset let me explain…it has nothing at all to do with Rooster in fact that part I totally understand and I have told you before that I am very upset with the way I handled that situation. I should have realized the whole picture and asked you about the whole picture before exploding the way I did. But honestly, the part that I guess I am struggling with is the relationship you had with Dwayne. I know that he was a great person but I know what I felt like here in the Ridge without you and I just couldn't even imagine being with someone else. Even after I discovered that you were in a relationship with Dwayne I just couldn't bring myself to go out with anyone else because my heart belonged to you. It always has in a way but the part that I am having issue with is that you were able to move on and give your self and your heart to someone else." He said not really wanting to hear the answer but knowing that he needed to hear it.

Janet looked at him and realized finally what the problem was. When Eddie first came to her it was as her friend to help her through the death of her boyfriend Dwayne. She never really realized how much of an impact it made on him. Their relationship transitioned from friendship back to their relationship so quickly that she never questioned it. He seemed so focused and sure that she was the person he wanted to be with, she didn't know that deep down he was hurt by her relationship with Dwayne no matter how short lived it was. Some how she would have to find a way to explain.

"Eddie, I am sorry that we didn't talk about this before. I guess I didn't realize how affected you were by that relationship. When I left the Ridge, I thought there was a good chance that I would not return. I knew that I could not live in this town without you and you were so angry with me that I didn't think you would ever forgive me. After seeing your reaction to Ikey and what he had done with Allison I just knew that you could not forgive me for what I had done. It was only by chance that I found that opportunity to house sit for the Edwardson's. When I got to Hope I felt so lost. I had all these feelings and I just didn't know what to do with them. I spent night after night crying myself to sleep because I could not imagine my life without you in it. I was sure that I was in love with you but I didn't think you felt that way about me. My heart told me that maybe you felt something as he got so upset but as time went on I just assumed that you had given your relationship with Rory another chance because you didn't have to worry about me being there. I guess in my mind I thought you would move on quickly because that is what you had always done before. You had never told me how you felt about me so I didn't think you felt the same about me as I did about you. I never asked Hannah about you because I could bear the thought of hearing you were with someone else or that you were with Rory. One day I seriously believe I had a nervous breakdown, I had all these feelings and it was just overwhelming. I decided right then and there that I needed some way to get them out so I joined the kickboxing class and that is where I met Dwayne. We truly were student and teacher for the longest time but then I had a really bad day and my feelings once again got out of control. It clearly showed in the class and when Dwayne asked me about it the flood gates opened and I told him everything. I told him about you and our relationship and about what I had done. Oddly enough he had such a different reaction to what I had done then you did it somehow helped me to let go of some of my guilt and shame that I had been hanging onto. It really was the start of our friendship and that is pretty much how it stayed for quite a while. It only began to grow just before Hannah's wedding. We spent a lot of time talking about you actually. He was awesome at giving me another perspective and he did try and tell me to talk to you about everything but I was too scared of your reaction. I just thought we would both be better off being apart and living our lives without the hurt of the past. One day Dwayne talked to me about his feelings and I realized at that point that I had developed feelings for him as well. I am not trying to hurt you Eddie but he made me feel like I was amazing and he told me nearly every day how lucky he felt to be with me and he just made me feel so important in his life. I never had to guess what he was thinking because he always told me and he never made it a secret about how he felt about me…he always just seemed so sure. I guess for me it was the one thing that our relationship didn't have and I really needed that. Dwayne was not the love of my life Eddie but I did love him and I'm sorry if that hurts you. He was an amazing person with an amazing heart. He helped me to see things in myself that I didn't see myself. The one thing that you should know though is that he always encouraged me to talk with you and resolve our relationship. I guess he knew he wouldn't be around forever but I didn't know that. He always encouraged me to try and talk to you but as time went on I didn't see the point. I am sorry that I didn't take his advice because I would have found out sooner how you felt." She said with tears slowly streaming down her cheeks.

Eddie listened to everything she said and he had some tears of his own. It was hard to hear her talk about him the way she did but he had to admit he could understand the gradual nature of their friendship into a relationship and he certainly couldn't fault the guy for falling in love with her. He found it so sad that she didn't see herself the way they had seen her. "I have one question for you Janet. What were you going to do when he passed? Would you have returned to the Ridge if I hadn't come to you?" he asked.

Janet continued, "I love you so much and I know and have always known that you are truly the love of my life but during that time I just thought that you were gone, an impossibility. I don't know how to answer that question Eddie. I don't know what I would have done. Like I said I thought that there was no chance for us so I don't know if I would have come back here. I could not even conceive of the possibility of living in the Ridge if I had to see you with someone else everyday, especially Rory." She said quietly.

"Why did you think that I would have gone back with Rory? Janet we were together in high school not in the real world. She is way too high maintenance for me now. She would not have been happy here in the Ridge. She was only looking for something to make her feel better because her husband dumped her for another man. I have to tell you that after being with you for all those months I don't think anyone stood a chance to make me as happy as I was with you. I know that I didn't tell you that and I know now that I should have but no one really got me like you did. You never took any crap from me and you were not at all influenced by or impressed with the "Hail Eddie" like other girls were. I loved that about you. I just felt like I could be myself with you and that is something I never had with anyone else before. There was a safety that I felt with you that when things went wrong that night got to me more than anything because deep down I knew it was me that caused that reaction. Deep down Janet I knew that if I had told you how I truly felt and told you all the things about you that I loved you would never have reacted the way you did. You certainly would not have left. There is one thing that you should know. I promised you that I would be honest with you and this is one thing that you probably don't know but I need to tell you now. The reason why I got so upset when you came to me to tell me what you had done was in part because of the major mistakes that I have made. I was angry because I knew that I was in love with you and I had put our relationship in a situation that I swore I would never do again…." Eddie was trying to tell her about Hannah but stopped making any kind of sense…

"Eddie what are you trying to say." Janet said as she sat up a bit on her elbow.

"I slept with Hannah when Rory left me in high school. I got drunk – beyond drunk and ran into Hannah down by the lake. She was upset because Nick hadn't come back from Europe and she had this feeling he wouldn't. We were both so drunk and upset and just needed to take it out on someone so we used each other. She found out she was pregnant days later and knew the baby was Nick's because of how far along she was. We decided we wouldn't tell anyone about it because we didn't see the point. Nick didn't return for another 9 years and you and I weren't together until Nick came back. I tried to get Hannah to agree to telling you both about it but she didn't think it would be a good idea. I know now that secrets just have this way of destroying the things that you love the most. I am hoping that you can understand what I am trying to say and I know that you will be angry with me especially because I am such a hypocrite for getting upset with you for sleeping with Rooster when I did the same thing to my best friend." Eddie finished but couldn't look at Janet.

Janet laid there and tried to understand what he was saying. It was a long time ago but why would either one of them keep it a secret from her. She wasn't a part of their life at that time…Hannah was her best friend and she kept this to herself all these years – even when Janet started to date Eddie. They knew that Sam was Nick's even back then but Eddie treated Sam like a son and took him to baseball games and football games and all this stuff. She always wondered why he did that and now she understood. It was Eddie's way of making up to Nick what he had done, betrayed his friend. She didn't seem to be upset about the fact that her best friend and husband had been lovers at one point but she was having a difficult time understanding Eddie's reaction to her sleeping with Rooster. She thought that he should have been more understanding of the situation because he himself had been in that position once. She didn't say anything just laid back on her back and stared at the ceiling.

Her silence was killing Eddie. He knew he did the right thing by telling her about what happened but he was afraid that he hurt again right now. He just wanted to hold her close and kiss her and make love to her to show her how he felt but he knew he had no right to ask right now. He didn't know if he should walk away and give her some time or just hang out and wait for her to respond. He just stayed there frozen waiting for a sign of what to do or say.

Suddenly, Janet's stare turned from the ceiling and turned to Eddie. "I am trying to understand why you both kept this from me and I am trying to understand why you reacted the way you did in the hospital but what I can't understand is why you looked at me the way you did that day. I truly felt like the worst person on the planet – the way your eyes bore into mine. The anger I felt in your eyes and how you physically rejected me Eddie. I just don't know how you could have treated me that way knowing you had made the same mistake. The way you treated Ikey…the pain he endured because of your disappointment. That wasn't your battle to fight Eddie. You should have stood by your friend and offered some understanding of how something like that could have happened. I know the circumstances were different but we all make mistakes – even you Eddie clearly your judgment isn't totally sound. With you Eddie however you don't seem to forgive as easily and I don't understand why. I don't know that you would have forgiven me if I would have stayed here in the Ridge. I don't know if you would have ever gotten past my wrong doing. And as for Dwayne, he gave me the one thing you didn't in the eight or nine months we were together and that was unconditional love. He loved me and was confident in his feelings. There was no hesitancy and no second thought. He was proud to be with me and he let everyone know it from day one. So you want to know the truth Eddie, here it is Dwayne loved me for me – no question, no worries about what other people thought and no judgment – he just wanted to be with me – it was as simple as that. I needed to feel that Eddie. I needed to feel that I was worthy of someone's love for me…I needed to feel confident that I was worthy myself for someone to love…you destroyed that in me that day in the hospital and over the course of our relationship but most importantly the day Rory came back to town you left me by the wayside – in the dark – as if my feelings weren't the most important ones to you…you were still making those decisions based on your feelings…and what you wanted. You hurt me Eddie that day and I may not ever forget it but I learned that my happiness can not be based on my feelings for someone else that they have to come from how I feel about myself. I don't understand how you could possibly keep this secret for as long as you have but I guess it doesn't matter much anymore because what's done is done. As for how you feel about my relationship, well it doesn't much matter because it happened and at some point you will have to come to terms with what you did and didn't do in our relationship and that is not for me to say or feel for you. You have to own it and deal with it on your own – I guess what I am trying to say is your on your own with this one." Janet said.

Eddie continued to lay there and listened to every word that Janet said. He took in every word and some words really hurt, but he knew that he needed to hear them and he needed to understand her points. He most of all needed to accept what she was saying as he knew that everything she said was the truth. The things that she said were worse than the beating he took from Matt by far, but he knew she was right. He didn't treat his relationship with Janet as Dwayne did and he was very lucky that everything worked out the way it did because if truth be told he didn't deserve her love or her forgiveness but he vowed right then and there to make sure he would not make that mistake again.

Janet didn't know what else to say. She wasn't sure how he would take what she said and she wasn't sure how he would react and she still didn't know how she felt about it all. She felt Eddie's presence very close to her now. She turned her head and she felt his head on her chest and his arms go around her back. She felt him slowly tremble and realized soon that he was shedding tears into her chest. In all the intimate moments they had encountered she had yet to experience this level of sorrow. She could feel how he clung to her and she realized that in his way he was expressing his sorrow for all the mistakes they both had made. She realized in that moment that throughout their life together they would encounter lots of ups and downs but that this moment was truly the moment in which they forgave each other and themselves for all the mistakes in their relationship and they would be free to begin their married life free of secrets and any distance between them. As their child continued to grow and develop and as they prepared for their role as parents – it truly was the beginning of the story of Eddie and Janet Latekka…the day that all the secrets, masks and fears were stripped away and all that was left was the pure and strong love of two people who fought to have their life together through all of life's obstacles. She knew that now there was nothing standing in there way of a true and happy life and though this day had been emotional and difficult at times the bond that they formed would withstand anything life placed in front of them, for better or worse, in sickness and in health truly until death parted them. Now they could focus solely on their future, the house – their son and even helping Ikey get back on his feet. Janet finally had the one person in her life that she could truly open herself up to because he had finally exposed himself to her…the inner most part of Eddie that he kept to himself he now shared with her. Even though she loved Dwayne there was no denying that her heart in its entirety belonged to this man resting his head upon her chest. She slowly grabbed Eddie's head and brought his face to hers. His eyes were red and full of tears. His sorrow was as clear upon his face as his brown eyes were to see. She brought his face to hers and kissed him with every ounce of love she had in her to show him that she was his and nothing would change that. That is how they ended their night just spending the next hours kissing on and off and holding each other tight. Tomorrow was a new day because tomorrow they would return to some sort of normalcy – their jobs and trying to juggle their crazy schedules but it also held the promise of all the wonderful things to come for the Latekka family.


	45. Chapter 45

**(I don't own any of the characters but I love em!)**

Chapter 45:

The weeks had flown by since the day that Ikey awoke from his accident and surgeries. Every day he made steady progress with his recovery. His memory was still sketchy but at least he was beginning to remember Eddie and Nick. Both of them stopped by the hospital on a daily basis to help Ikey with his memories and his recovery after they finished their jobs. Eddie was able to finish the job that Ikey had gotten hurt on and Nick managed to continue to land more and more jobs keeping them both busy.

Janet had returned to Sully's working only part time but she enjoyed the time hanging out with her regulars and keeping her mind off all of the things that were ahead. Eddie and Janet had gone to their scheduled ultrasound appointment the following week after her collapse and got another look at their baby but this time it was in 3D so they actually got to see parts of his face and the doctor definitely confirmed it was a boy. It was very apparent much to Eddie's pride. Janet just laughed at him being all proud of how his son looked. He definitely looked more like his father in his facial expressions and shapes but some features were all Janet. They were so excited that day to see him so clearly. But there was so much to do. They continued with the process of buying the house they had seen on the outskirts of town. The owners accepted their first offer so everyone was excited for the move. Janet wanted to get moving because she not only wanted to get them established in the home but wanted to start with the baby's room now that they knew they were having a boy she had so many ideas of what she wanted his room to look like. When she was home and Eddie was working she would read books like crazy on child progression and babies and everything that related to her present situation. It helped her feel more prepared and kept her busy while Eddie was gone.

Things had changed for Janet and Eddie that day in which they bared their souls to each other. All the baggage from the past had been resolved and there was nothing but honesty between them. Their connection was so amazing and strong after they awoke that next morning. Eddie had never felt as close to anyone in his life than he did to Janet – not even his best friends that had been with him in his life since he was a kid. There were parts of Eddie that he never showed anyone before that night that he opened himself up completely to Janet. Janet had not felt the way she did after that night with anyone before either. She never again felt even the slightest bit of regret or hurt or anger or fear when it came to Eddie and their life together. She had no doubts for the first time in her life about anything and she was the happiest she had ever been. She had wished that they had had that conversation so much earlier but as time went on she realized that every thing needed to happen just as it had to bring them both to that point. Now they spent their days getting ready for the move and their precious son that they still couldn't agree on a name for.

Eddie walked into the house and was looking for Janet. "Hey babe where are ya?" he said searching through all the rooms. They had just finalized all the paperwork and had started the process of getting Janet's house ready to be vacated. Eddie didn't want Janet doing all the packing but she was stubborn and worked on a little bit of it everyday. He eventually found her on their bed with clothes all around her but she was sound asleep.

Eddie didn't have the heart to wake her but he thought to himself and smiled, "maybe I could use a nap too." He tried to move the clothes off the bed but realized that they were all under her in some way so he decided just to snuggle up to her. As he got onto the bed and nestled himself behind her he shifted just slightly so he could place his hand on her belly and spend some time with his son. Just as he did that she began to stir but didn't wake up, she just shifted herself and snuggled right into him as if she knew he was there. Eddie just smiled as he knew this was purely out of habit and that if she knew he was actually there she would have woken up. Eddie liked nothing more than to spend this time with his wife. He closed his eyes and before long they both were sound asleep snuggled up against each other with Eddie's hand remaining on Janet's belly.

A few hours later Eddie began to stir and so did Janet. She woke up and realized that she had fallen asleep but seemed more surprised that Eddie was right there with her. She reached up and placed her hands on his face and kissed him until he awoke the rest of the way. "When did you get home?" she asked smiing.

"A little while ago but you looked so peaceful I just couldn't resist nap time myself." Eddie said looking back at her and he initiated another kiss this time.

"What brings you home in the middle of the day – not that I mind?" She asked snuggling back into his chest.

"I wanted to talk to you about something. I went to see Ikey today and the doctors think that he is ready to come home but there is some concern about his apartment being that it is upstairs so I talked to Ikey about the possibility of renting out this house after we move. All the necessities are on the first floor that he would need to get around and it is big enough if he needs a walker or crutches or whatever to help until he is totally mobile again. I know that we talked about renting out the place at least initially until we were ready to sell so this would work out perfectly. What do you think?" Eddie said so happy.

"Well it sounds like the timing couldn't be more perfect. I think it would be great to let Ikey live here. It certainly would be big enough for him as it was for my grandparents before they moved to the nursing home. I like the idea of renting it because I am sure if I am ready to sell it just yet…it was my grandparents house and I am kind of attached to it." Janet said honestly.

"Have you talked to your grandparents about it? What do they think?" Eddie asked knowing that it was hard for her to leave the house.

"Yeah I did and they are really happy for us with the new house. In fact they said they can't wait to see it so I don't think they care that we are moving but it is really just me Eddie you know how I am with my grandparents…it will just take time." Janet said rubbing Eddie's face as she looked at him.

Eddie started to think that Janet had some thoughts on her mind and he was most definitely going to pursue them. Eddie began to rub her back and run his fingers through her hair. The more they talked the more Janet got this look on her face letting him know that she definitely was thinking the same thing he was thinking. Eddie decided to take matters in his own hands.

Eddie began to kiss Janet and as he may his way from her lips he began a trail from her face down her neck and onto her chest. Janet just responded by rolling onto her back and running her fingers through his hair as he spent a lot of time getting aquainted with her body. She knew that soon she would not be able to be on her back due to the babies growth and her growing tummy. So she decided she would just enjoy the treatment that Eddie was giving her. Eddie loved the sounds she made when he did that. He loved that part of Janet that seemed to be love spending their time together at any point during the day or night. She very rarely turned down his advances and today was no different. Eddie discovered another aspect of her pregnancy that he really enjoyed and that was her absolute need to have sex. Sometimes it was sweet and slow and other times it was quick and hot. Eddie smiled at the memory of Janet attacking him one night when he came home from work. He thought at first that she was just coming up to him to say hello but when she took everything out of his hands and just dropped it on the floor ( something she never did) and lead him to the living room and began to quickly rid him of his clothes he knew she wasn't just saying hi. He loved this part of her that was so spontaneous and free. She didn't seem to have any issues with her body and how it was changing…it wasn't like it used to be when she was scared of what he would think of her. Truth be told Eddie knew that all of the most satisfying and hot sexual experiences he had to date were all with Janet. Mentally he wanted to kick himself for waiting so long to be with Janet that first time because he knew he could have been having this amazing sex way before they began if he would have just gone with his initial feeling but he decided to wait. At the present moment he was very happy that those days were long gone because right now he couldn't think of anything he would rather be doing than making love to his wife.

This was how they spent the rest of the afternoon. Today was definitely a slow and amazing day in which they both took their time and made love to each other as if they hadn't seen each other for days – weeks even. As they snuggled up to each other after they had both settled down they couldn't help but smile. Both of them were so satisfied and happy.

"So do you have to go back to work today?" Janet said somewhat still a little breathless

Eddie smiled and laughed a bit, "I don't think I could work after that if I tried." She laughed a bit to and he raised her face to his for a sweet little kiss.

"You know that it is all your fault though…you look so hot in those work clothes…what is a girl suppose to do?" Janet said looking so innocently at him

"Oh I think it is all your fault for looking so beautiful laying on our bed…what is a husband to do but enjoy the opportunity to show his wife how much she is loved." Eddie said so sweetly.

"Well I can't argue with that now can I…so do you have to work?" Janet said a bit more serious now.

"No I don't but tomorrow will be a long day. I know you wanted to start to move things over there after the closing tomorrow but I won't be able to help. Nick has gotten us this big job and it will cover most if not all of Ikey's medical expenses so we can give you that money back that you spent for him. Plus it will help to get him set up here and on the road to recovery financially and there will be enough left to actually give BFW a profit so all and all it was a no refusal kind of job." Eddie said hoping she would understand.

"Are you going to be able to go to closing because you have to sign the papers too Eddie?" Janet said clearly disappointed but trying to be supportive.

"Absolutely, I will use my lunch hour to do that. Oh I didn't mention that I have hired a moving company to come over and move everything over there in my absence." He said smiling knowing he had her going…

"WHAT! You are so bad you know that! Have I ever told you what an awesome husband you are? I love you so much Mr. Latekka" she said smiling

"Well what's not to love really." Eddie said laughing

"Hey!" janet said slapping his arm

"I love you too Mrs. Latekka and I love you little baby boy that we can't decide on a name for." Eddie said leaning down and kissing her belly.

"At some point we are going to have to decide on that by the way." Janet said

"I know but seriously Janet I don't know if I can name my child Tyler or Andrew…I mean they are fine but I was thinking more like Jay or Aaron or maybe Aiden…I heard that name today and I really kind of like it." He said kind of thinking out loud.

"Aiden huh…I kind of like that too." Janet said looking at Eddie.

"You do? Well I think we may have just solved our name issue…Aiden Edward Latekka…it sounds nice doesn't it." Eddie said

"Yeah it does, doesn't it." Janet said "Well then Aiden Edward it is…Hi there Aiden…how do you like your name?" Janet said rubbing her belly – just then Aiden moved and they both could see the shift in position. "Well I'll take that as a yes!" Janet and Eddie both laughed.

Eddie then said, "now that that is settled let's go get something to eat…I am starving – you wore me right out." He laughed. Janet just looked at him and smiled. "why don't we go out for a burger…I think Aiden would really enjoy that – I know I would." Janet said. "Oh your using our son to get your way is that how it is…well I guess I am out voted so lets go." Eddie smiled and stole one more kiss before they got up, redressed and headed to Sully's.

**(Thanks so much for reading the story – I hope you are enjoying it! I would love to hear what you think so please review! Thanks!)**


	46. Chapter 46

**(I don't own any of the characters but I love em!)**

Chapter 46:

Eddie and Janet walked into Sully's hand in hand and scooted out a booth to sit in when they saw Nick and Hannah sitting in the booth slightly tucked away in the corner. They both looked at each other and smiled knowing that Nick had finally gotten over his anger enough to talk with Hannah about everything. They didn't want to intrude in their conversation so they chose a booth on the other side of the bar.

Janet and Eddie sat down and the waitress came up immediately to help them out. Truth be told everyone was so fond of Janet there that she was treated better then most of the regulars. They ordered their favorite burgers and Janet got a lemonade and Eddie of course his favorite beer. Janet was getting used to the fact that she couldn't drink but didn't really care much. Little Aiden was moving like crazy tonight and this made both Janet and Eddie laugh. Janet of course could feel it more so than Eddie but he could feel it too. He was so excited to meet his son. He would sit and think about times in which they could play ball together or go fishing. Eddie thought about all the things that he wanted to teach him and hoped one day to be in his life as more than just a father – a person that his son would come too when he needed advise or to help. Eddie had really always wanted that relationship with his father but it never worked out that way. Eddie also thought about having a girl someday too and how fun that would be. But he thought he would need to wait for a while to talk to Janet about that idea…one he was sure she would agree with but now just wasn't the right time.

An hour or so later they finished their burgers and were just thinking of heading out when Nick and Hannah approached their table.

"Hey guys what are you two up to tonight?" Hannah asked

"Just getting some supper, what are you two up too?" Janet said looking directly at Hannah now.

"We thought it would be good to talk away from Sam, we have a lot to figure out." Nick said looking at Hannah

"And did you figure that 'stuff' out?" Eddie said inquiring

"I guess so, maybe to begin with." Hannah said rather distantly

Janet was looking at Hannah and it didn't seem like everything was quite right. She could see something in Hannah's eyes that told her that Hannah didn't quite get the answers she was hoping for or at least in the possibility of their relationship department anyway.

"so I hear that you are moving into your house tomorrow." Nick said to Janet

"yeah, apparently I have some movers coming over tomorrow to help me." Janet said looking at Eddie.

"I can give you a hand tomorrow Janet, Sam I am sure will help too." Hannah said glad to be off the topic of her and Nick

"That would be great Hannah. My plan is to let the movers do all the heavy lifting and I will arrange the stuff as we take it out of the boxes." Janet said smiling really excited about her new house.

"Only as long as you don't overdo it…I don't want another call from the EMT's about you collapsing again…my heart can't take those calls anymore Janet." Eddie said only half kidding

"I promised you I would be careful…just going to work slowly and you can do the rest when you get done with work." Janet smiled knowing that was not going to happen.

"or this weekend…maybe." Eddie said chuckling

"Well we'll let you two get back to eating" Nick said rather suddenly and turned to leave.

"See ya in the morning then." Eddie said

Nick called back behind him "Ok."

Janet looked at Eddie and said, "well something didn't go well there. Did you see Hannah's face?"

"Yeah but she needs to give him some time…she hit him with a lot that day and he is trying to understand it all. Love is a funny thing but deep down I think Nick still loves her and wants to be with her he is just hurt by her keeping Sam from him especially when he first came back and asked her point blank if he was Sam's father." Eddie said honestly

"I know but I hate to see Hannah so upset…for years she was so upset by his leaving the way he did and I think she was scared to tell him the truth at first and open herself back up again not knowing how long he would be here. It is hard to open your heart to someone who has broken it so completely." Janet said not really thinking about how it pertains to her and Eddie.

Eddie looked at her and looked down. He was silent for a moment and then said, "I know it is but sometimes you need to take the chance because sometimes the second time around can prove to be the best decision ever you make in your life." This time looking directly at Janet.

Janet looked up briefly and saw the look in his eyes and realized that they weren't so much talking about Nick and Hannah anymore that he was talking more about the experience they had just had when they both opened up so completely to one another. She smiled and grabbed his hand.

"You know Eddie Latekka you are one amazing man…I love you so much." She said so sweetly and placed her hand on his face.

"I love you too Janet Latekka, what do you say to a movie and some serious snuggling on the couch…" he said with a grin

"Sounds like the perfect evening." She said smiling right back at him.

The next morning was a busy one for both Janet and Eddie. Eddie headed out to work very early in the morning. He kissed a still sleepy Janet before leaving and promised to be at the closing on time to sign the papers. She had a little time left before she had to get up so she slept for a bit longer.

Janet got up later on and showered and got dressed in some very comfy sweatpants and a long shirt. The one thing she truly loved about being pregnant were the comfy clothes she got to wear. Some days she felt as though she got to wear what felt like PJ's all day long. Today was no different. Once she was ready she headed to the title company for the closing appointment. She texted Eddie quickly just to make sure he was on his way.

Eddie received the text message from Janet and had to laugh at her tendencies to worry about him forgetting things. He was so excited to finally be moving into the house even he wouldn't have forgotten their closing date but it was a busy day so he had to carefully schedule it in as to not throw off the rest of the progress of their window project. He had gotten back to work and had completely forgotten to text her back.

Janet arrived at the title company and was pacing back n forth because she hadn't gotten a text message from Eddie so she didn't know if he had even gotten her reminder. She didn't think he would forget but she would feel a little better if he would have at least responded to her. As she made her way to the window again to see if Eddie was in the parking lot the door opened and their was Eddie. Janet smiled and walked quickly up to him. He was pretty dirty but she just didn't care. He smiled that big smile he got when seeing her and they embraced. She kissed him quickly and he decided that he deserved more than that. As she started to pull away he tightened his grip on her back and she smiled knowing exactly what was coming. They kissed for a few more seconds and the receptionist called their names.

Soon Eddie and Janet were done with all the signing and where the proud owners of the home they both fell in love with. The real estate agent gave them the keys to the house and the garage door opener. She also gave them a gift bag of sorts that had lots of fun things in it for the "new" home owner even though both of them had owned homes before as a married couple it was their first one together. As Janet and Eddie shook hands and began to leave the building Eddie said, "Hey do you have a minute I got something I have to get out of my truck."

"Oh ok did you want me to take it home or something?" Janet said not really understanding why he would say that.

As Eddie got to his truck and Janet slowly walked up to it Eddie turned around and gave Janet this little gift wrapped box. Janet smiled and said, "What is this?"

"I got you a little something to remember the day by" he said smiling.

Janet looked at Eddie with such love in her eyes. What a thoughtful thing to do, she thought. As she unwrapped the little box she noticed it had two compartments, one had a beautiful silver key chain that had the date engraved on it with a simple L on the other side and the other compartment had a little seed bag with a picture of flowers on the outside. She looked up at Eddie with tears just brimming her eyes.

"Eddie this is so sweet, I can't believe you found the time to do this." Janet said smiling

"Well I thought this was a pretty big day that we should remember, the day that we bought our first house together that we'll raise our children in and hopefully grow old in and I promised you once that I would give you the beautiful garden that Mrs. Edwardson had so I thought today would be a good day to start with that. Mr. Edwardson would buy his wife the flower packets when he was on the road and I wanted to do the same for you so when I am in different places installing windows I plan to do the same." He said looking directly at Janet.

Janet stood there as if someone could have pushed her over with a feather. How did he know that story? Had she told him that story or did Gran? Either way how amazing was this man standing in front of her. She would never have expected this from him years ago but Eddie had changed into this man who spent time letting her know exactly how he felt about her with no questions or hesitations. She could not have been happier than she was in that moment.

Janet leaned forward and put her arms around his neck. She kissed him so deeply and with such passion they both forgot they were still in a parking lot. To them there was no one else in the world. Eddie responded immediately and put his arms around her lower back. Suddenly Aiden began moving and he kicked Eddie right in the stomach. They both drew back quickly and looked at each other and laughed. "Wow that kid has strong legs." Eddie said laughing.

"Definitely his father's son!" Janet said rubbing her belly

"Listen sweetie I really got to get back but I will come out to the house when I am done and we will work on breaking the house in properly when I get there." Eddie said lifting his eyebrows and patted Janet in the butt.

"I look forward to it. See you later Eddie. I love you." Janet said smiling

"Love you too babe." Eddie said getting into his truck and heading back to the work site.

Hours later Janet was sitting in her new kitchen at the table looking at all the boxes that were surrounding her. The moving company did an amazing job getting things moved out of their house and into their new home. They sit up all the furniture as Janet wanted it in the rooms that she wanted them and placed all the boxes in the room that they were meant to be in. She really felt that they went above and beyond her expectations. Maybe they felt sorry for her condition so they worked extra hard to help her out and it would because then she could unpack boxes at her pace and not have to carry anything to any place as all the boxes were exactly where they needed to be. She decided unpacking the kitchen was the first in her priority. As she began to go through the boxes, the doorbell rang. She was surprised but when she opened the door she was even more surprised to see who was standing there. It was Hannah, Aubrey, Allison, Pizza girl, Sully and Sam. They all came to help her unpack. Sully of course brought some food from the bar and refreshments since he knew that the kitchen wouldn't be ready for a bit. Janet just stood there in shock. Hannah noticing Janet's reaction said, "Hey aren't you going to let us in…there is work to be done!" Hannah said

"I have snacks here…anyone hungry?" Sully said.

Janet just stood there and then moved to her right and got out of their way. They all filtered in and the rest of the afternoon was spent unpacking boxes and cleaning up each room. Everyone took a different area/room so they were able to get almost the entire house unpacked and everything relatively where it is suppose to go. Janet would go room to room and answer questions about placements of things and before long most everything was put away and she was just taking boxes out of the house and putting them in the garage. Once the kitchen was set up, she got a pot of coffee going and arranged all the snacks that Sully had brought over on the island in the kitchen so people could snack as needed. She got the refrigerator cleaned to her liking and began to put all the food away in it. She also was able to clean the cabinets and get the dishes put away however she knew it would take awhile for them to figure out where everything was. She didn't care because she knew that this house would be so amazing for them both and for Aiden when he came along.

It was early evening and Janet was sitting in the all seasons porch watching as the sun set. Everyone had just left about a half an hour ago and most everything was put away and done. She couldn't believe that with all the help that her house was unpacked and ready for Eddie to come home. He would be so surprised that everything was done. She was looking forward to him coming home but she knew in her heart that he would be so tired that there was no way that they would pick up where they left off. She looked out the windows at the back yard and couldn't wait to get out there and pick a place for her garden. She wanted it to be in a place where she could see it and enjoy it without it interfering with their back yard activities. As she fell deep in her thoughts, Eddie came home about a few hours later. It was late in the evening and as he walked into the door he couldn't believe what he saw. No boxes just everything in its place and the whole place smelled so clean. He suspected she had some help today and the thought made him smile.

He walked to the kitchen and found Janet sitting on one of the couches in the all season's porch looking out the windows. It was dark outside but she seemed to be deep in thought. She didn't move when he came in so he decided he would go take a shower and get cleaned up. He walked through the house and everything was so neatly put away and every room had the furniture it was suppose to have. He walked into their bedroom and bathroom and was amazing at what she had done with it. Most of the stuff in the bathroom was new. She must have gone shopping with out him knowing because everything was a mix of colors for both a man and a woman. It made him smile to know that she was trying to make it theirs instead of hers.

A mere 15 minutes later Eddie was showered and dressed in sweats himself looking for Janet. He was starving and hoping that she had something for him to eat. In the time that he showered she must have realized he was home because she had a bunch of snacks, appetizers that looked like they were from Sully's and sandwiches made for him and layed out on the island in the kitchen. As he walked into the kitchen Janet just smiled and said, "welcome home babe."

"It is really good to be home." Eddie said walking right up to her and grabbing her up in his arms. They shared a heart stopping kiss and he released her slightly so he could look at her.

"The house looks amazing…I can't believe you got all of this done in one day." He said.

"Well I did have some help. You know we really do have some amazing friends!" she said looking up at him "Are you hungry? I have lots of things to choose from." She said walking over to the fridge and pulling out his favorite beer.

"You are the best wife ever, you know that right?" Eddie said taking the beer and filling his plate with all the goodies he could pile on there.

"I know" she said laughing

They enjoyed a late supper together and spent the time talking about the day. Eddie was exhausted after the days events and truth be told so was Janet but their minds were just not going to give into the exhaustion. They wanted to be with each other so badly after their parking lot experience so Eddie decided to take matters into his hands, literally. Janet didn't resist not even a bit and the two of them walked upstairs hand n hand to their bedroom. Janet had somewhat prepared for this possibility so she had placed a bunch of candles all over the room. Eddie noticed this when he was upstairs showering so he took it upon himself to light them before he went downstairs. Janet couldn't help but smile because she saw what he had done and realized that their minds were focused on the same thought for a while it seemed. She didn't want to push him knowing he had had a long work day but she was so hoping that they could finish what they started.

They walked to the bed and each of them stripped from their clothing. As they stood facing each other completely naked Eddie looked into Janet's eyes and placed his hands on her face and kissed her so passionately. After a few moments his hands began their descent downward and around. They stood just kissing and touching each other. It was much like the time in the shower in which they needed to have that connection but this time it would be about so much more. Their intention was to come together as one and that is exactly what they did. In the candlelight of their bedroom, Janet and Eddie spent the next hour making love with one another and enjoying each other. Eddie spent some time caressing Janet's belly and letting her know just exactly how much she turned him on in her present condition. Janet spent time running her hands all over Eddie's body enjoying every muscle she felt. Once they had thoroughly satisfied each other, they layed there in each others arms and Eddie ran his fingers through her hair and she rested her hand on his stomach and her head in his shoulder area. There wasn't any discussion just silence and then sleep.

In the morning hours the sun began to rise and unfortunately the one thing Janet's had not anticipated was getting a curtain for the French doors in their bedroom so the sunlight filled the room very early. Eddie of course could sleep through anything so he barely moved. He had worked very hard the day before and had today off so he planned on spending a great deal of time sleeping in. Janet didn't want to disturb him so she gently removed herself from their bed. She walked up to the doors and looked outside. It was a beautiful day and she thought she would go downstairs and make some coffee and sit on their balcony while Eddie slept in. She made her way downstairs and was in the process of making coffee when she felt the most peculiar thing. She knew what it felt like when Aiden would move but this was different. She couldn't put her finger on it so she went and found her baby book to see if there was something in their about what she was feeling. She poured herself a cup of coffee and took the book out side to the balcony and sat at the little table and chairs that the previous owners had left for them since it was made specifically for this balcony. She rubbed her belly and read her book and realized that what she was feeling was Aiden having the hiccups. It was so cute once she realized what it was that she smiled and laughed openly.

"What are you doing in there that is giving you the hiccups Aiden? I hope that you are enjoying your time in there. Daddy and I just moved into our new home. I know that you will like it. It has a big back yard and you will be able to have a dog and run and play just as little boys do. I have to think about what color to paint your room. The room is a purple color right now so that probably won't work for you huh. I am thinking maybe a pretty ocean blue or maybe a bright red with sports stuff…I have a feeling that your daddy will want you to play sports. I promise you that we will have everything ready for you before you are ready to meet us for the first time. So my love, you rest and try to get rid of those hiccups…I am sure we will have more to talk about soon. Your mommy and daddy love you Aiden so much." She said rubbing and staring down at her belly.

Eddie woke up when he felt around for Janet and she wasn't there. He started to open his eyes and the sun light was bright but he could see Janet sitting at the table on the balcony. She was looking down at her belly and talking. He had to smile because he loved it when he caught her doing that. She did it more and more as her belly became bigger and bigger. There was something so amazing about when she did that…he couldn't take his eyes off her when she did. He was so excited for his son to be born. They only had about two months or so to go and he couldn't wait. Now they could work on getting the room ready and everything put into place. He had made up his mind that he would work on making his son a dresser and a toy box. The crib he felt would be too complicated for him but the other pieces he has done before so he felt confident he could make something special for his son. He would have to talk to Janet about it but he wanted to do his room with a sports theme…basketballs, footballs, soccer balls, baseballs…or maybe big trucks…he loved those as a kid himself. "I guess it really doesn't matter" he thought, whatever it was he would be happy because he had his family right here and everything was exactly how he wanted it. He got out of bed and walked over to the French doors. He opened them quietly and put his hands on Janet's shoulders. She jumped just slightly but smiled up at him when she realized it was him.

"I hope I didn't wake you Eddie it is still early." She said concerned that he didn't get enough sleep.

"You didn't but you know you could go back to bed with me." He said with a grin

"The sun is too bright. I'll have to go later today and get some sort of shade for those doors." She said

"I didn't say that you would be sleeping, did I" eddie said lifting his eyebrows.

"No I guess you didn't did you. You know the coolest thing happened this morning." Janet said rather distracted

"hmmm, I just got up what happened that was so cool?" he said grinning

"Aiden had the hiccups…it was the funniest feeling. You could see my belly go up and down." Janet said swatting at his arm noting his insinuation.

"He did? Why didn't you wake me up so I could have felt it too." Eddie said rather disappointed.

"I didn't know that is what they were at first. I had to look in my book to figure it out. He stopped thought when I was talking to him." She said rubbing her belly again.

"Well next time let me know. I love it when Aiden moves around in there." Eddie said reaching down and placing his hand on her belly. "Good morning Aiden. Daddy loves you." He said quickly.

"So getting back to that nap thing…." Janet said grinning getting up and slowly walking right past Eddie towards the bed

"What nap thing?" Eddie said smiling as he grabbed Janet and they both climbed on to the bed and with that the two of them shared a wonderful morning in their new home sun and all.


	47. Chapter 47

Chapter 47:

Today was the last Lamaze class that Janet and Eddie had to take. Janet was due in just weeks now and was more nervous than ever. They both attended the class and learned all the proper techniques and things they needed to know but all Janet could think of was the mechanics of it all, so much to remember – what happened if something went wrong? She had grown to love this tiny child growing inside of her so much that the thought that something could go wrong…it was just more than she was able to handle. Eddie knew that a lot of Janet's fears were merely the hormones raging through her body – this much he got from the instructor so it was his job to make sure that these next weeks were as stress free for Janet as possible…not such a small task, he thought.

Eddie had finished Aiden's room just days before Lamaze class was over. It was absolutely beautiful. He painted the walls a combination of blue and red – mostly because they couldn't decide so he painted two walls red and two walls blue. He also painted all kinds of different sports symbols on the walls as decorations. The room turned out amazing with lots of primary colors and things to visually stimulate Aiden. Janet had spent a great deal of time stenciling the sports equipment on the walls but Eddie was adamant that she did not paint so he did that during his evenings home. He also worked on building a dresser and toy box that was definitely made for a boy. It was solid Oak but had these amazing sports accents on them. The toy box had a baseball bat as a handle to open the toy box and the dresser had basketballs and footballs as the knobs to the drawers. The girls had gotten together and bought them this amazing crib for Janet's baby shower that had a crib set to go with it – sports themed of course. Everything was done and in place just awaiting Aiden's arrival. As the time grew closer Janet began to panic wondering if she truly had everything ready to go. Eddie felt like he needed to be the strong one but inside he was just as nervous but yet so excited.

Janet and Eddie had just sat down for dinner. Eddie had worked a very long day and of course Janet had waited for him to come home so they could eat together. She didn't really have much of an appetite these days because she was all baby. She had begun the stage of pregnancy when every movement brought its own challenge. It was difficult walking or moving around in general. She hadn't really gained a lot of weight but her belly was very large and in the way of just about everything. Janet was most definitely ready to be done with her pregnancy and move onto holding her little boy Aiden.

"Aren't you going to eat anything?" Eddie said practically shoveling the food in his mouth.

"No, I'm really not very hungry." Janet said sitting in the chair just rubbing her belly. She had this weird feeling that she couldn't put her finger on.

"Is everything ok, Janet?" Eddie asked concerned.

"Yeah, I think I am just tired. I stopped by Sully's today just to chat a bit. I haven't seen much of Sully lately and I kinda missed him, besides he had some book work to finish that he couldn't figure out. That man is clueless when it comes to ordering anything for his own bar." Janet said laughing a little.

"I think he does that on purpose so you'll order it for him." Eddie said with a grin.

"Yeah I think you are right. I don't mind though, I kinda miss it." Janet said

"Are you saying that you want to go back to work after Aiden is born?" Eddie asked

"I don't know…I think it is just because I am not used to sitting around and waiting for Aiden to finally make his appearance…who knows what I'll feel like when he finally arrives…if he ever does." She said looking and again rubbing her belly

"Well you will have to see how it goes Janet…if you really need to get out of the house sometimes I can watch Aiden and maybe you could work some in the evenings or something." Eddie said trying to make Janet happy but he really just wanted her to be home with Aiden.

"I do appreciate that Eddie but Aiden is my priority…although I miss the gang Sully's isn't going anywhere." Janet said with a smile.

Suddenly Janet felt this sharp pain that shot right across her belly into her lower back. It nearly took her breath away. She doubled over in pain.

"What's wrong Janet?" Eddie said leaping out of his chair to come to her. "Is it the baby?"

"I don't know but whatever it is that hurt!" she said with tears forming in her eyes.

Just as quick as the pain came it went and Janet just sat there a bit stunned. "What a crazy feeling that was! Aiden is not due for another few weeks so this must be that practice labor pain they talked about in Lamaze class, boy, that definitely got my attention!" Janet said chuckling a bit.

Janet and Eddie resumed what they were doing, Eddie eating and Janet just staring at her food and moving it around with her fork. Once Eddie was sufficiently full Janet began to clear the dishes and pack up the extra food. Eddie said sternly, "Oh no you don't…I will take care of this why don't you go and soak in the tub…that should calm what ever is going on in there." He said pointing to her belly.

Janet smiled. She continued to feel so lucky to have Eddie in her life and every day he did something that reminded her of how far they had really come. She said, "ok, I think you may be right about that bath…but ahh when your done why don't you join me." She said with a wink

Eddie looked at her and smiled a big smile and began to move a little faster around the kitchen. "your on" he said.

Janet had just eased herself into the oversized bath tub. She had lit a number of candles and added a few bubbles to the bath. She loved the bathroom in the new house. The tub was in the corner of the over sized bathroom and had lots of ledge space to place candles. In the daytime it had windows on the one side so Janet could sit on the other side and look out over the back yard or in the evenings she could sit on the corner side and it overlooks the bathroom. It was the only room that was modernized compared to the Victorian feel of the rest of the home. For her it was strong selling point because she loved taking baths but this particular bath tub was even big enough for Eddie whose long legs typically made taking a bath out of the question. Truth be told he never took baths before Janet but there was something about the time they spent together skin on skin resting against one another that made all there cares float away like the bubbles did in the water.

Just as Janet eased herself into the water she felt hands running down her back and around to her belly. Eddie had apparently cleaned up the kitchen in record time because he was behind her ready to help her get into the bath tub and do some relaxing of his own. Janet just smiled and looked briefly over her shoulder. She loved these times and knew that once Aiden came that these times would be few and far between.

The two of them gently sat down and Janet leaned her back against Eddie's chest. He wrapped his arms around her and rested his head on her shoulder. She simply leaned back and closed her eyes. Eddie began running his hands around her belly more in a massage manner than a seductive one. They had not engaged in any sexual activity for nearly a month because it became too complicated and uncomfortable for both of them due to the size of her belly. Not for lack of trying but they ended up becoming breathless over trying to find a position that worked instead of reaching that orgasmic bliss. They ended up laughing a few times in how hard they were trying. Eddie was very attracted to Janet and he knew that it would be a while before he would be able to be with his wife again but he knew that it was just as hard on Janet. They both decided that revisiting the foreplay that they once engaged in quite frequently would be just as satisfying at this point.

"Have I told you how beautiful you are today?" Eddie said still rubbing all over her belly slightly turning the direction from a massage to something a little more fun.

"I am pretty sure you covered that this morning but that doesn't mean you can't say it again." Janet said just smiling knowing where he was going.

They sat there in the tub, in the peace and quiet of the bathroom, in the candle light and spent the next hour enjoying each other. Regardless of how big Janet was this was the one thing that never failed to bring her to her most pleasurable place. She did the same for Eddie. Once she was thoroughly satisfied she turned to face Eddie and began to give him the same treatment as he had done for her except this time there was a lot of kissing and looking at one another. It didn't take long for Eddie either. There was just something about when Janet placed her hands on him that sent him over the edge rather quickly to his dismay.

As they eased back into their original position and snuggled into one another they talked about the days events and the rest of the week's schedule of activities. They knew that they needed to exit the tub soon because the water was getting cold and they were turning into prunes. Eddie said, "why don't we head into the bedroom…if we don't our finger prints may turn into someone else's." he chuckled.

"yeah your probably right." She said.

Eddie helped her out first making sure she was on a town and safe and then he got out. Eddie never had an issue with being naked and walking around. It never really phased him. The one thing Janet learned early on when they returned to the Ridge and began to live together as a couple. She had to smile whenever he would get out of the shower and go and talk to her completely naked with no real understanding why she was so shocked when he would. She eventually got used to it but she was definitely not the same. Tonight was no different. He came into the bedroom completely naked and was talking to Janet as if he was completely unaware of his nakedness. Janet just stared at her husband and once again smiled. She thought, "there are just some things that will never get old."

They settled into the bed and before too long Janet was fast asleep. Eddie got up one last time and made sure all the doors were locked and everything was turned off. He liked the fact that he was able to keep things safe around the house for her. He felt a strong sense of pride in that.

Eddie eased back into the bed and snuggled right into Janet. Janet moved slightly and snuggled into him as if he was a pillow she was arranging just so. Eddie was asleep within minutes with a big smile on his face.

About an hour after they went to sleep Janet woke up feeling like she had to pee. She got up and waddled to the bathroom but before she made it to the room she felt as though she had pee'd her pants. She looked down and suddenly realized that her water had just broke.

"EDDIE!" Janet screamed

Eddie slowly came to consciousness again and looked around. He didn't see Janet and suddenly her voice registered in his head. He leapt out of the bed and headed for the light in the bathroom.

"What's wrong" he said

"My water just broke Eddie…we are having the baby…Aiden is coming tonight!" Janet said almost hysterically

"Ok Ok just relax we got this so ok first of all lets get dressed and then get you into the car." Eddie said running around in a circle.

Janet looked at Eddie as if frozen and said, "Eddie we are having a baby."

"Yeah we are Janet." The two just looked at each other for the briefest of moments and then both began to walk as quickly as they could to their bedroom to get dressed and head for the hospital. Baby Aiden was on his way.

**(Sorry for the delay in posting a new chapter…this has been a busy summer but I hope that you all enjoy the chapter and I will work on getting you a new one soon.) **


	48. Chapter 48

Chapter 48:

Eddie was now dressed and trying to gather all the things that they needed to go to the hospital. Janet however was sitting on the edge of the bed and seemingly was frozen in time. She was starring at her belly and didn't seem to be to concerned about the fact that she was in labor. Eddie stopped and looked at Janet…just moments before she appeared hysterical and now she seemed to be in another world just sitting there and starring at her belly.

"Uhh, honey are you ready to go?" he said cautiously

Janet didn't answer

"Janet, are you ready to go…we need to get you to the hospital babe" he said again very cautiously not knowing what was going on in her head.

As if the spell was lifted Janet looked up and directly at Eddie, "Eddie, we are going to have our baby…what if we aren't ready…we are going to be parents…we just got married Eddie…what did we do?" Janet had tears in her eyes.

Eddie now realized that Janet was experiencing a lot of emotions right now and he needed to be there for her. They talked about this in their Lamaze class that some new parents especially moms get overwhelmed and need to be reassured during this time.

"Janet we have been parents since we found out about Aiden. We have been with each other for a long time and friends with each other even longer than that…we will figure everything out as we go and we have lots of friends to help us along the way…Janet we really need to get to the hospital otherwise Aiden might decide to make his entrance into the world in our bedroom…" he said slightly laughing hoping that he got through to her.

Janet looked at him and let out a slight breath. "Ok, your right we'll be fine…what am I doing here? We have to go." She said and as if it just struck her she got up quickly from the bed and started getting her clothes on that she kept out waiting for this day to come.

They made their way to the hospital and entered into the emergency room. Eddie had called ahead to Janet's doctor and they were all prepared for her arrival standing in the doorway with a wheel chair.

Janet's contractions had started shortly before they got into the car and she was trying very hard to breathe through them but they were very strong and she was having a hard time focusing like she learned in Lamaze class.

"Ok Janet just sit in here and we'll get you up to the maternity floor." The nurse said.

"I don't want to sit…I want to walk…it hurts, it hurts to sit." Janet said in between breaths.

"Sorry Janet but it is hospital policy…we'll get you up there as soon as we can." The nurse said walking a little faster.

"EDDIE!" Janet screamed.

"I'm right here sweetie…just breathe and we'll be there in no time ok." Eddie said now starting to get a little panicky

They all arrived on the maternity floor and although it had been a short trip the things coming out of Janet's mouth were down right reminiscent of a truck driver in a bar fight. Eddie kept looking at Janet not knowing where this language was coming from as he never heard her say half of the things that were coming out of her mouth. The nurse just looked at Eddie and said, "this is totally normal…women in labor are unpredictable and when they are in large amounts of pain there is no telling what they will say."

Janet managed to get to her room and the nursing staff got her ready for labor. The doctor walked into her room and said, "well Janet it looks like we are having a baby tonight…let's catch you out and see where we are at."

Janet never said a word however if the look on her face was any indication it would not have been a good idea to say what she was thinking.

The doctor examined her and said suddenly, "apparently Aiden is in a hurry tonight as you are ready to push…sorry Janet but you are 9 centimeters dialated and 95 % effaced…it will only be a few more minutes and we can have you start pushing…how long have you been in labor?"

Eddie decided it was best for him to answer, "her water broke about an hour ago but she was having some difficulty coming to terms with Aiden coming tonight, but we got here as soon as we could. Her contractions started just before we left our house…"

"Wow well if that is the case you are a quick birther Janet which is great but this means that we won't be able to give you anything for the pain but it shouldn't take a long time if you progress that quickly." The doctor said to Janet

All Janet could do was look at everyone in the room. She was in so much pain, more pain than she had ever experienced in her life that she couldn't do anything but try and focus on her breathing. Eddie tried to get her to acknowledge the doctor and him but all he got was the evilest look he had ever seen from her so he decided to leave that alone and focus on what the doctor told him to do.

About 20 minutes later, the doctor was scrubbed up and ready to go. Janet and Eddie were both breathing and Janet times would scream out when the contractions got so extreme. Eddie felt so terribly because he really didn't know what to do…the Lamaze class talked about pain but never prepared him for what he was experiencing now. But he remained as cool as he could so Janet could focus and he could help.

The doctor got right in between her knees and said, "Ok Janet we are ready, do you want to meet your son?" Janet would have liked to answer the question but she just couldn't.

"OK, now Eddie I need for you to grab her knees and pull them towards her head and Janet I need you to give me a big push…on three…one, two, three…now push Janet." The doctor coached.

Eddie grabbed Janet's knees and drew them back as far as he could. Janet closed her eyes and pushed as much as she had strength to do. Eddie tried to count to ten but Janet didn't make it that long.

"Ok, so that was a good one Janet…again." The doctor said.

This went on and on for what seemed like hours but it was only about 45 minutes. Janet was tired quickly and could not seem to find any relief from the contractions and pain from pushing. Everyone in the room was getting worried that there was an issue that Aiden was not coming as fast as he originally presented with how fast she went into labor.

"Ok, Janet I need you to push as hard as you can." The doctor said very focused.

"I CAN'T….I JUST CAN'T!" she screamed. Janet was starting to lose her composure and could not focus from the pain and fatigure.

"I know that you are tired Janet but he is close and if we don't get him out soon then we will have to go in C section and his health could be at risk…please Janet I know that you are struggling but please try." The doctor said sternly.

Janet sat there for a second and knew what she had to do. She got back into position and looked up at Eddie who was still holding her knees and trying to help her anyway that he could. "I know you can do it honey…please just try…I love you." Eddie said with tears circling in his eyes.

"Ok one more big push Janet I think I can feel the head." The doctor said.

Janet screamed out and suddenly the doctor said, "Eddie do you want to see your son being born?"

Eddie looked at Janet and let go of her legs. He adjusted himself slightly so he was standing next to the doctor and there was Aiden's head and with the final little push that Janet gave the doctor was able to manually pull the baby out the rest of the way. Eddie just looked in awe at his son. He was perfect with all his little fingers and toes. He had dark hair and blue eyes just like Janet. He definitely had Eddie's frame and he was a very long baby which was why she was having a hard time getting him out of there. Janet instantly felt the relief that she so longed for hours earlier. She relaxed back onto her pillow and looked anxiously at Eddie to see his face. He had the biggest smile she had ever seen. Suddenly, the nurses grabbed Aiden and cleaned him up a bit, wrapped him in a blanket and handed him to Janet. She looked into her son's eyes and he smiled right back at her. He began to cry a little but when Janet spoke to him he stopped and started to just coo a bit. He was squirming around and looking around the room. Janet had a hard time taking her eyes off of him but she did look up briefly when Eddie came back to her side and was looking at her as if to say, "we made this…we have a son."

"Oh my God, Eddie he is beautiful and perfect…our son." Janet said now with the tears streaming down her face.

"He is Janet…you were amazing sweetie." Eddie said and kissed her forehead.

Just then Janet handed her son to her husband. Eddie took his son in his arms for the first time and he could not think of a time that he had experienced in his life that would ever mean more to him than this moment. Just then the nurses began to take pictures of Eddie and Aiden and Janet and Eddie and Aiden and various combinations of the new family. Eddie had asked the nurses to do this prior to when the doctor came in because he wanted to capture this moment forever.

The nurses said, "You are a beautiful family…you have some people waiting for you."

Eddie and Janet looked at each other and didn't know who would be out there…they didn't call anyone. Eddie said, "let me go and see who is here and you hold your son for a moment ok."

Janet looked at him and smiled, "absolutely" and she went back to starring at her son.

Eddie walked into the waiting room and was not prepared for the people that were waiting for him. All of their friends were standing there along with Sully and Janet's grandparents. They had balloons and were waiting so patiently until they saw Eddie and then started talking and yelling congratulations at the same time. Eddie just stood there not knowing how they would have all known but yet so happy to see the people that they were the closest too standing there. He knew that Janet would be overwhelmed but she would want to see her grandparents.

"I just don't know how all of you knew to be here but we are happy that you are here. We have a beautiful, healthy little boy, Aiden Edward Latekka. He is a little football player 8 pds 4 oz and 24 inches long…Janet's labor progressed really fast so she couldn't have anything and the labor was hard and long so she is pretty tired right now but I think she may want to see her grands." As Eddie turned to look at them, Edith had tears in her eyes. She so wanted to be here when she went into labor and was hoping to help her in some way but she really wanted to see her grandchild.

Hannah was the first to speak, "We'll stop back tomorrow Eddie but please let her know that we were all here for her and give her a big hug and kiss from us all…I knew something was going on with her just by the way she was acting these last few days…I called her grands because I knew it would happen soon – thank God I went to pick them up today. Congratulations Eddie." She went to give him a hug and he said in her ear, "Thanks Hannah, Janet will love that her grands are here…we'll see you tomorrow."

With that all the friends came up to Eddie and gave handshakes or hugs and wished him congratulations. Within 10 minutes the waiting room had cleared out and it was just Eddie and the Grands. "Ok, let's go and meet your great grandchild shall we."

Edith had tears in her eyes, "let's do that."

They made their way back to the room that Janet was located in and Janet began to say, "who was out there Eddie I didn't think you…." She stopped in mid sentence when she saw her grandma walk in behind Eddie. "Oh my God, Gran are you really here?" Janet began to cry.

"Yes, honey I am right here…" Edith walked right up to Janet and gave her a big hug.

"How are you here? How could you have possibly known that tonight we would have Aiden?" Janet was shocked

"Hannah just had a feeling and we thought there was no way we were going to miss this." Edith said while Janet hugged her grandfather.

"Remind me to thank her." Janet said with a smile on her face.

"She said congratulations and she'll be here tomorrow with everyone else pretty much to see our beautiful boy." Eddie said beaming

Just then the nurses brought Aiden over now all clean and recently bathed. She handed the baby to Janet and she showed off her baby boy to her Grands. Edith said right away, "he has your hair and eyes Janet but boy does that boy look like Eddie." She looked at Eddie briefly and thought back to their conversation before he went to find Janet in Hope. She knew in her heart that these two people deserved to be with one another and this was just the blessing that made it so amazing that they found each other again…love always finds its way back…she thought.

Eddie could not stop smiling and the four of them just kept taking pictures of Aiden and with the Grands and with Janet and Eddie. Janet was not normally a fan of taking a lot of pictures but tonight everything changed for her. Suddenly she didn't care so much about any of that stuff as she had in the past. She had everything that she had ever wanted in that room and she wanted every moment captured.

Soon, hours had passed and it was really late. Janet was exhausted and really needed some rest. After much arguing about it with Eddie, her grands and even the nurses Janet finally relented and agreed to get some rest. They took Aiden out of the room so Janet could sleep and put him in the nursery where Eddie and the Grands went to watch him a bit more but not before they all said their goodbyes to Janet before she drifted off to sleep, Eddie being the last to leave.

"I am so proud of you Janet. You were so amazing tonight. Words can never begin to let you know how much I love you and how happy I am with our new family. We have a beautiful baby boy and that is because of all you have done to keep him so safe and healthy. I want you to rest tonight and I will see you as soon as you wake up, I love you Janet with everything I got." He said almost on the verge of tears. He didn't know what was happening to him but when he saw his son being born it changed him so dramatically. He saw himself and Janet in such a different light. Janet looked at him and could not speak as she was so choked up by the words that were coming from Eddie. He kissed her so gently and she responded and slowly closed her eyes. Before Eddie left the room she was already asleep.

Eddie got the Grands to their hotel safely and to their room. He said that someone would pick them up again tomorrow and take them to the hospital but they needed their rest too now. With that he returned to the hospital and sat in the nursery in a rocking chair and spent a few hours holding his son in his arms. He wasn't tired at all and really wanted to be with his son. He wasn't going to leave Janet so he thought now would be a good time to spend some quality time with his son until she woke up or he got tired. He sat in that rocking chair and stared at Aiden. He was asleep by now and he was just the cutest little boy. Eddie's thoughts drifted back to a year ago when he was so lost and alone. He had lost Janet and really was lost himself not knowing what to do with his life. He had spent so much time fighting against his feelings for Janet when they were together because he was afraid of what it all meant. He was scared that he would come to depend on her and he didn't want to depend on anyone. He didn't want to let anyone get that close to him to affect him that way but Janet did it without him having any ability to control it. Unfortunately she didn't know just how much he loved her before they both made such horrible mistakes with their relationship. He spent that year without her and he never felt so alone in his life. It was as if he couldn't go back to who he was before her and he couldn't find her to get her back in his life. But then everything changed when Dwayne died. His death brought about a new life for Janet and Eddie. Here he sat holding his son and he thought to himself, "had I known that this is what my life truly should have been about I would have never let her go…Edith was right true love finds its way back and you Aiden are my heart and you are the heart of what your mommy and daddy created because they loved each other so much…she fought for you so hard even before she knew you existed…Aiden you will never know just how lucky you are that Janet is your mommy…well maybe someday you will know…you are our blessing and I love you so much…I never knew how much I wanted this until I saw your head for the first time…I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe and always make you feel as loved as you are." Eddie began to fall asleep rocking back and forth with Aiden in his arms. The nurse came over and tapped Eddie on the shoulder. Eddie woke up and the nurse said, "why don't you go and sleep and we'll take care of Aiden until the morning – which is only a few hours away, Ok?"

Eddie looked at the nurse, "yeah you're probably right. Take good care of my son." He said as he handed a sleeping Aiden to the nurse.

He headed back to Janet's room as they had set up a bed in there for him as well. He walked in quietly and saw his wife sleeping soundly in her bed. He walked up her and gently brushed her hair out of her face and kissed her so gently she didn't even move. He then walked to his bed and began to lie down. As he stared at the ceiling for those few minutes before sleep came to him as well he smiled to himself and thought, "I don't know what could possibly be better than how I feel right now…Thanks God for giving me another chance…she really was and is my meant to be." With that thought he drifted off to sleep.

**Sorry again for the delay in writing. I hope you enjoyed the time between Aiden and Eddie. Sometimes it is good to reflect on our many blessings in spite of all the things that may get in our way sometimes. There is more to come with our favorite couple so please keep reading and reviewing…I love reading the comments!**


	49. Chapter 49

Chapter 49:

Janet was the first one to wake in the morning – mostly because the nurse had come in again to check her out. Janet was completely unprepared for the "after effects" of giving birth to a child. Apparently that part of the Lamaze class she wasn't paying attention to or something because she was unaware that the nurses literally came into her room approximately 4 – 5 times throughout the night to "knead" her stomach to make sure her uterus was returning to its former glory. She was so exhausted she barely remembered the first few times but the last few were definitely in her memory. The last time the nurse came in she just decided to get up. She attempted to move a bit but her body felt literally like she had been hit by something very large. She felt somewhat fortunate that she didn't have any of the medications because she didn't have to deal with not feeling her legs or any of those after affects that happen when you get the epidural. But none the less she still felt like her whole body had embarked on a marathon that she had not trained for. She looked around the room briefly to check out what was happening and she saw Eddie sleeping on this cot type bed that clearly was too small for his large frame. She noticed however that he still had the biggest smile on his face that seemed to be permanently stuck there from yesterday. She couldn't help herself from smiling at the sight. She then realized that she wanted to see her son in the worst way.

Janet reached around to find the call button to call for the nurse to get Aiden from the nursery however before she found it she heard a light tap on her door. She said, "Yeah."

The nurse walked in just then and said, "Just checking to see if you were awake…someone seemed to be hungry." With a big smile she walked through the door pushing the small portable bassinet that held Aiden in it wrapped up like a burrito and squirming around trying his hardest to free his hands and feet.

Janet just smiled and said, "you read my mind" just then the nurse placed a very wiggly baby in Janet's arms.

"So were you planning to breast feed?" the nurse asked

"Well I am going to try but this is all a bit new." She said looking somewhat concerned

"Ok well let me help you." The nurse helped put the baby in the position he needed to be in and helped Janet adjust herself for Aiden while explaining verbally everything she was doing so Janet knew what to do the next time.

"Don't worry if it takes a couple of tries because sometimes babies don't latch on…." Before the nurse could finish her speak Aiden was already sucking and drinking anything that was coming out.

Janet sat there and was staring both at the nurse and then at Aiden. She never felt anything like this but just then she started to laugh.

"What are ya thinking?" the nurse said looking at Janet a bit puzzled.

"Of course Aiden would be good at this…just like his father." She sort of chuckled to herself.

"Of course he is…that's my boy." Eddie said just having gotten up as the nurse was explaining things to Janet and was watching the whole time. Now he was walking towards his family feeling quite proud and in awe all at the same time.

"I didn't know you had woken up." Janet said smiling at Eddie

Eddie leaned down and kissed his wife gently on the lips and looked at his little boy and just touched his head gently and then sat down in the rocking chair next to Janet's bed.

"Look at him…man he must have been hungry…I'm a little jealous." Eddie said laughing

Janet just looks at Eddie, "you did not just say that." She said with a smile.

"Well I am going to leave you two alone with your son…just make sure you burp him in between each breast." With that said the nurse left there room

Janet could not take her eyes off her son. She never thought two years ago or even a year ago she would be sitting here looking at her son breast feeding with Eddie sitting just a step away looking at her the way he was. She could not think of a time in her life when she felt such happiness.

"You know you look so amazingly beautiful right now." Eddie said just admiring the scene in front of him

"I don't feel very beautiful but thank you." Janet said just looking briefly at Eddie and then back to Aiden.

"I don't think I have ever seen you more beautiful than right now Janet." Eddie said so lovingly

Janet just looked at him and they shared this brief eye lock moment.

Janet decided now would be a good time to burp Aiden and adjust him to the other side. He really didn't want to let go but she was able to make it happen and just as she raised him up to her shoulder to burp him he let out this huge burp for a little baby. Janet looks at him and Eddie bursts out laughing. "Yep definitely my kid." He said still laughing.

Janet adjusted him on the other side and repeated the process. She could tell when Aiden was beginning to get satisfied because his eyes started to flutter between open and closed. He didn't spend nearly as much time on the other side and his burp was very quiet and tiny and soon he was again sound asleep. Janet just looked at him in amazement that she was able to do this for him. Perhaps for the first time in this whole process Janet felt like a mom.

Janet looked at Eddie who was sitting in the rocking chair just staring at Aiden and she decided to let daddy have some time. "Hey do you want to hold him for a bit…I think I am going to try and take a shower." She said knowing he really wanted to hold his son too.

"Are you sure you are ok to take a shower alone." He said sounding concerned.

"Yeah I am sore for sure but I think I can stand by myself for a little while." She said moving to hand Aiden to Eddie.

Eddie opened his arms and took Aiden and two boys spent some quality time rocking in the chair.

An hour later Janet was showered and changed into the clothes she brought with her. She felt good to be in regular clothes and not in a gown for a change. She knew it wouldn't be long before the gang would surface and everyone would want to see the newest addition to the Latekka family. She no longer sat down on the bed and adjusted the back so she was sitting there was a knock on the door.

"Hey I hear there is a new baby in this room" a very excited Hannah said as she began to open the door.

"Come on in Hannah." Janet said smiling.

Hannah walked in with the biggest array of balloons that Janet had ever seen along with some presents for Aiden and Sam following close behind her.

"Hey buddy" Janet said to Sam as he walked up to Janet and gave her a big hug.

Eddie still had Aiden in his arms and they were rocking and watching the sports highlights on ESPN.

"Ok, Ok you had him enough now it is time for Auntie Hannah" Hannah said as she was practically pulling Aiden out of Eddie's grasp.

Aiden was still sleeping and was unaware of all the fuss that was going on in his regard. Sam then walked over and sat next to Eddie on the couch since Hannah kicked him out of the rocking chair as well.

Hannah sat there and looked at Aiden and began to talk to him as if he was able to understand everything that she had to say. Eddie decided to take this opportunity to go over to his wife and properly say good morning even though morning was long gone.

Eddie walked over and said to Janet, "move over I want to lay down a bit."

Janet looked at him like "what are you talking about…don't you tell me to move." Eddie knew she would react that way but when she moved he laid down and adjusted himself so he could take his wife in his arms and kissed her like he had not seen her in months.

Janet was taken a back a little not expecting that was what Eddie was up to and completely forgot that Hannah and Sam were even in the room. She loved the feeling of closeness that existed between her and Eddie now. Something changed between them and they felt so connected to each other…she wasn't sure if it was the baby or him watching her feed their son…whatever it was the way he looked at her and the feelings she felt when he did she could not help but wish they were alone but she knew even if they were her body was in no condition to even entertain the thought.

Eddie whispered in her ear when he released his lips from hers, "I can not even begin to tell you how much I love you and our son and happy I am right now…the gift you have given me Janet is more than I had hoped for and I am so thankful that I have you and Aiden…thank you for my family Janet." He had tears begin to form in his eyes but he didn't move until they had subsided.

Janet sat there and took in his words. She felt like he had given her the gift…their son but she knew he meant giving birth and carrying him and surviving through that horrible truck accident. She always knew in her heart that it belonged to Eddie even when she was with Dwayne but right now she knew that he would have it forever just as Aiden had it from the minute she found out she was pregnant. She finally felt as though she was a part of a family moreso then when she was only with Eddie. She never realized that this is what her heart longed for until it happened. She knew right then that Eddie was right when they talked about working and all the possibilities…Eddie knew she would want to stay home and be with Aiden and right now she knew that there was no where she wanted to be more than home with her son.

She leaned back and once again they locked eyes with each other – no more words were uttered. They leaned into each other and shared another heart stopping kiss only to be interrupted by the rest of Eddie's gang of friends now loudly making their entrance into the room.

It was early evening and all the visitors have come and gone. Janet's room was so full of balloons she felt like she was in a party store. There were flowers on every surface in the room and presents all collected in the corner of the couch. Janet looked around and just took in the scene of how much Aiden was loved by the family and friends. She thought back to when Aiden was placed in the arms of her grandma and the conversation that they shared…Aiden opened his eyes for the first time that day when his great grandma was speaking to him and it looked as if he understood everything that she said. Janet wasn't able to hear everything that was said with all the commotion going on in the room but she knew what ever Grands said to Aiden it was important to her to say. She also thought back to watching Eddie talking and laughing with his friends and showing off his baby boy. Eddie looked so happy and proud… a look she thought she had seen before but nothing compared to what she saw today. It was a very good day. The nurses came to get Aiden just after Janet fed him his "supper" because he needed to have his hearing checked and all the other stuff they needed to do to get him ready to go home the following day. It was just Janet sitting in the midst of her room enjoying the moment of peace and quiet. She was getting tired but knew that once they were back home sleep would not be as easy as the nurses made it in the hospital so she decided to just briefly close her eyes and wait for Eddie to return.

Eddie had taken Janet's grandparents back to their hotel when they were tired. He just didn't feel right sending them home in a cab. He knew that Aiden would be going back to the nursery and this way he thought it would be the perfect time to stop and get something for Janet to commemorate the day. He made his way back to the house as he remembered when Edith had given him the ring from Mrs. Edwardson that had all the colors of her garden in it from her late husband. He knew that this would be the perfect time to give it to her.

Eddie returned to the hospital and found Janet with the TV on but she was asleep. He was a bit disappointed because he really wanted to give her the ring in the peace of the night but he knew he would have time so he settled into the rocking chair and grabbed the remote and began to change the channel to something he wanted to watch. Suddenly he heard, "if you think you are just going to change the channel when I was watching that show you got another thing coming mister." Janet said opening her eyes with a big smile.

Eddie just chuckled and said, "oh I'm sorry I was unaware that you could watch TV with those things getting in your way" motioning to her eyes pointing at her eye lids since they were closed.

"I have many talents Eddie…you should catch up on knowing what they are." She said smiling and chuckling herself.

Eddie stood up and went to sit next to his wife, "trust me when I tell you I know exactly what your talents are…how do you think Aiden came along?" He said with a mischievous smile.

They shared a kiss and Eddie placed a small wrapped box in her hands. "What's this?" Janet said

"Just a little something for you." Eddie said waiting to see her expression

Janet slowly opened the box and just stared at the beautiful ring inside of it. It was a cocktail type of style ring but with all this color. It looked old and she began to wonder where he could have gotten such a beautiful ring.

Eddie looked at Janet and knew exactly what she was thinking so he began to share with her what Edith had said to him, "When I went to see your grandma before I came to Hope to find you she gave me this ring. It was Mrs. Edwardson's ring. She got it from her husband for their anniversary. The colors symbolized all the colors of the flowers in her garden that he had given her over the years and she made grow so beautifully. When he passed away while you were taking care of their home, Mrs. Edwardson gave it to your grandma with strict instructions to give to you because without you taking care of their home and garden she would not have been able to come home to the beautiful flowers that he had given to her. For that she wanted you to have this. I have been trying to find the perfect time to give it to you and now seemed like the right time because you gave me the best gift I have ever been given and that is my son Aiden and a family. Some day Janet I am going to make sure you have a beautiful garden of your own so you have a reminder of how much I love you but until I can do that I hope when you look at this ring you feel how much I love you and our family. "

Janet was so overwhelmed by the story and the ring and all the things that Eddie was saying. She just looked at him as if through new eyes. She leaned in and placed her hand on his cheek and kissed him as passionately as she could so he could feel how much this meant to her. When they finished kissing, they both settled back on the bed and Janet put the ring on her finger. There was no need to use any more words, they just settled in for the night and snuggled into each other. Soon both were asleep in each others arms. The nurse came in and saw the sight in front of her and she thought to herself, "you know what this can wait until tomorrow."


	50. Chapter 50

(sorry it has been so long since I have written but I needed to figure out what direction I wanted to go and have time to actually write…so here we go….)

Two Months Later….

It had been a difficult few months for Eddie and Janet. Although the birth of Aiden went smoothly nothing after that did. Janet and Eddie were so excited to bring their boy home but they were not prepared for what would come next. They knew there would be sleepless nights but Aiden was a colicky baby and often cried much of the night. Janet always took care of him because Eddie was working and she felt badly for him to be up so much during the nights. Janet was becoming overwhelmed very quickly with motherhood and being a wife and tending to the house with little to no sleep. Hannah would come and help when she could be it really wasn't helping much as Janet continued to function on such little sleep it made the rest of her life so much more difficult. Over time, Eddie and Janet's relationship suffered due to her lack of sleep and stress over a very challenging baby. Eddie would try and help where he could be felt so out of his element. He always envisioned sitting holding his baby and playing with his son but he never imagined listening to hours of crying with little to no success of getting him to stop. Janet's growing frustration was also difficult for him to manage. She had always been so upbeat and happy that this side of her was one thing he had not seen. When ever she was able to get Aiden to sleep or calm down she just wanted to sleep so there was virtually no relationship intimate or otherwise between her and Eddie. He tried a few times to talk to her about it and she reacted negatively each time as if he was criticizing her or putting pressure on her, at least that is how she felt. Janet had spoken to Aiden's Peditrician for some advice on how to calm Aiden but none of the suggestions were working. Janet and Eddie had both reached a breaking point. Eddie began spending more time at work where it was peaceful and quiet and he didn't have to deal with Janet's constant unhappiness with just about everything he did, in his mind. Janet could sense that things were going badly with Eddie but had her hands full with Aiden and just didn't know what to do. She went to talk with the one person she thought may be able to help her out.

Janet walked into Hannah's house with little Aiden tightly wrapped in his car seat, for the moment he was sleeping, finally.

"Hey girl, how are you doing?" Hannah said hugging her friend

"I don't know Hannah, things are not good with me and Eddie. Aiden is so cranky most of the time and I just have to spend so much time tending to him that I can't tell you the last time I even got a hug from Eddie. He seems so distant and now he stays at work later and later at night…I feel like I am losing him, Hannah." Janet said with tears brimming in her eyes.

"This is completely normal Janet. Every new parent goes through this adjustment period where the baby is your focus…I promise you it will settle down…Eddie is probably just trying to stay out of your way. The two of you worked to hard to find each other again there is no way that Eddie would leave you. It will pass Janet I promise." Hannah said reassuringly rubbing Janet's hand.

"It doesn't feel normal though. I am stressed all the time because I feel like I can't do everything with Aiden constantly crying and not sleeping. I don't want Eddie to get up with him because he is the only one working but when he wants to spend time with me I just want to sleep and I get so frustrated with him for not understanding that. He has no idea how hard it is the listen to Aiden cry all day and sometimes most of the night with no breaks and not be able to do anything to get him to stop. I feel like I am losing my mind. And now he stays away longer and longer…you don't think he found someone else do you?" Janet said so quickly as if a lightbulb went off in her head.

"That is just crazy Janet. This is sleep deprivation talking. Eddie would never find someone else…he loves you and Aiden. Maybe he just thinks he is doing you a favor by staying out of your hair…you know men they don't want to rock the boat. If you are really worried about it why don't you drop off Aiden by me and go surprise Eddie one night with dinner and you two can try and reconnect…then you'll be able to talk and work it all out…how does that sound?" Hannah suggested.

Janet sat and thought about it and said, "you know that does sound like a really good idea. You wouldn't mind?" Janet said hopeful

"Not at all…Sam and I would love to watch our favorite little nephew." Hannah said looking at Aiden now awake in his car seat.

"Great. How about tomorrow night? Would that work?" Janet said really excited about the prospect of being able to spend some time with Eddie alone.

"Perfect." Hannah said as the two continued to talk a bit and then Aiden got fussy so Janet went on her way home.

That night Janet was hopeful for the first time in weeks that she could get her relationship back on track. She didn't hear Eddie come home during the night and when she woke in the morning he wasn't there. She didn't know if she just hadn't heard him or if he never returned home. She tried not the let it bother her because she knew that tonight was the night that they got back to being husband and wife.

Eddie had opted to stay at Best Friend Windows that night. He had a very early job and didn't feel like dealing Aiden crying or Janet ignoring him to tend to Aiden as she had been doing or just frustrated or irritated with everything he tried to do to help. He didn't get much sleep though because his mind kept trying to figure out a way for them to get back to where they were but he wasn't seeing how they could. He was wondering if this new relationship was one he could actually live with. He had heard having a baby is challenging but this really wasn't what he thought they meant by that. Eddie went to his job site and had returned to BFW to drop off the supplies and stuff before heading home. He was just double checking his calendar for the next day when he heard the bell.

Eddie looked up from his desk and was shocked to find the one person he least expected to be there standing in front of him. Rory.

"What are you doing here Rory?" Eddie said rather startled.

"Well hello to you too. We actually have a job here…we are shooting a spread for a magazine and they are using some of the beautiful scenery around the Ridge as the back drop so I thought I would stop by since I saw the lights on. Well aren't you going to give an old friend a hug?" she said with a big smile.

"Oh, I'm sorry it has been a long day and I was just finishing up." Eddie said as he walked towards her and embraced her. He found himself lingering a bit longer than he should have but he hadn't had any physical contact in a while and a hug felt pretty good.

Janet was walking towards Best Friend Windows and stopped briefly to look at herself in the reflection of the window to make sure she looked nice. She had dropped off Aiden at Hannah's for the night so her and Eddie could spend some seriously needed time together. As she looked at her own reflection her eyes focused suddenly on what was happening in the shop. Eddie was hugging Rory. RORY! Her mind was racing. Was this the reason why he didn't come home last night? She stopped herself before she got to out of control. This is how things got so out of hand the last time and she was not about to let that happen again.

Janet walked through the door and stood there as Eddie was still in an embrace with Rory. Eddie focused on Janet just then and immediately let Rory go and started to walk towards Janet. Janet looked at him and said, "Am I interrupting something?"

Eddie stopped abruptly slightly taken aback by her tone. "Janet, what are you doing here? Rory, she just stopped by…what can't two old friends hug?" he said and with a slight harsh tone that Janet wasn't expecting.

"No Eddie by all means please continue…I am sure the two of you have much to talk about I have to go get Aiden anyway." With that Janet exited quickly before he saw the tears in her eyes. She could not believe that he was taking that tone with her like Rory is there all the time and it meant nothing. From her viewpoint they hugged a little too long for just "old friends."

Eddie stood there as if he was frozen. He knew he should go after her and straighten this out but there was something that was holding him back and he couldn't figure out what it was.

"umm, am I missing something here?" Rory said having looked at the scene in front of her and tried to figure out how these two could be in this place.

"I don't know Rory. Janet has not been the same since we had Aiden. She is upset all the time, Aiden has colic and cries all the time. I just don't know what to do. I love her but this side of her I just don't know if I can spend the rest of my life like this." Eddie said somewhat forgetting that Janet just left and got more caught up in his own issues with the bigger question that was on his mind and that was what would happen to their relationship if things didn't change.

Rory looked at him and realized that clearly he needed someone to talk to so she sat down on one of the office chairs and said, "ok tell me what exactly is going on…you obviously need to talk about it."

And that is how Eddie spent the next few hours - talking about the last few months since Aiden came home. He also told her about how he and Janet found their way back to each other and how he promised God he would never let her go again if he got her back. "I just don't get it…we were so happy and now everything is a mess. I don't even know how I am going to deal with this when I get home. Aiden will probably be crying and she will think something is going on…I just can't do this." Eddie said dropping his head in his hands. "The thing is I love her Rory more than anything I just want my Janet back not this person who can't find the joy in anything and doesn't want to have anything to do with me." He said sadly.

Rory sat and thought for a moment and then said, "Eddie why do you think she came here tonight? Maybe she is feeling the same as you and she was trying to make the first move. You are both new parents and that comes with challenges. I have heard that colic is horrible and can drive you batty. If she isn't getting to sleep and dealing with a crying child all day that is bound to make her upset and edgy…it would anyone. But I have also heard that Colic goes away so just look at this time as a period of adjustment and when the crying passes you will get your Janet back but you need to keep trying to reach her and listen to what she needs to be able to support her…don't stop trying Eddie because then she may feel that you are rejecting her and that is how the gap begins to widen…it widen's too far and you may lose her." She said matter of factly.

Eddie thought for a second and what she said made sense. He loved Janet and would anything for her and now he is being tested and already throwing in the towel. "Your right Rory, I am just being a Jack ass here aren't I…it was good to see you but I think there is someplace I need to be." He smiled and stood quickly. He kissed Rory on the cheek and turned to leave to go home to his family with a new resolution to find a way back to his wife…to his Janet.

Janet left the store and sat in her car for a few minutes. He never even came out looking for her. She was absolutely stunned, it was as if he wanted to stay with Rory more than he wanted to be with her. Maybe she was right all along, this time she confronted Eddie when Rory was there and she was the one who got the attitude like she was the one who was unwelcome. She didn't know what else to do. She went directly to Hannah's.

"Hey, Hannah, can I pick up Aiden?" Janet said trying not to appear upset.

"why aren't you and Eddie spending the evening together?" Hannah said surprised to see her.

"No apparently he has to work on a project for work so we'll just do it another night. No biggie." Janet played it off as if it wasn't what she walked in on.

Hannah looked at her but saw something much different in her eyes. "are you sure, you don't look so good Janet." She said skeptically.

"Yeah, one more day isn't going to hurt right? Now where is that beautiful boy of mine." Janet said.

Once Janet had Aiden strapped into his seat and had made a stop at her bank she headed out onto the main road, headed for the highway. Janet was so upset not knowing what Eddie was doing but the one thing she knew was she couldn't face him telling her that he didn't want to be with her anymore. Not now.

She wasn't sure exactly where she was going to go but she wanted some distance and some time to think. Her grandparents were out because that would be the first place everyone would look for her. No she needed some place that no one would find her. Suddenly she got this idea and headed to the one person she knew would help her and give her exactly what she needed.

Eddie strolled into his house so excited to talk with Janet but nervous as well. He had this new resolve and fire within him that he just needed Janet to remember him and how he felt and how they felt about each other. He thought it was strange that the house was dark but as he turned the lights on his heart began to sink. He found Janet's cell phone on the kitchen table which was strange because she always took it with her. What was more strange was the house was completely quiet. Normally something was running or happening and it was silent. He moved from room to room and nothing looked different other than there was no sign of Janet or Aiden. He walked into their room and all her clothes were all still there and nothing looked like it had been touched but it was strange that she wasn't there. So he decided to call the one person who would know.

"Hello?" Hannah said answering her phone

"Hey Hannah is Janet there by any chance?" Eddie asked hopefully

"ahhh, no Eddie she left here a few hours ago, why?" Hannah was surprised

"A few hours ago, where did she say she was going?" Eddie was now concerned

"She said that you had to work late so her plan of spending the evening with you was put off until tomorrow, why what is going on? Where are you?" Hannah asked now concerned herself.

Eddie sat there not knowing what to say. The feeling in the pit of his stomach was beginning to grow…the feeling of dread and worry that Janet was gone, that Janet left again. "She isn't here Hannah and I didn't have to work late, she came to see me and Rory had stopped by. I said something I shouldn't have and I haven't seen her since." Eddie said slowly and softly.

Hannah just stood there knowing that she sensed something was wrong with Janet but she wouldn't have dreamt it was that. Rory what was she doing here…again. "maybe she took Aiden somewhere…maybe to visit her grandparents…Eddie why was Rory there?" she said wondering if Janet's suspicions were right.

"Rory came in to say hi because she saw the lights on…she is working at some shoot here and thought she would drop in to say hi. Janet saw us hugging and she apparently once again freaked out." Eddie said frustratedly.

"What did she say to you Eddie? Or more importantly what did you say that you shouldn't have to her." Hannah inquired.

Eddie told Hannah the details of the evening and what had transpired. He didn't realize that Janet was so upset as he was about their relationship but after talking with Hannah he knew that he had made yet another monumental mistake in regards to Rory with Janet.

"What am I going to do Hannah? She is gone and now she has my son too." Eddie said near tears.

"well don't panic Eddie we will figure it out. Let me make a few calls…" Hannah said already trying to figure out who to contact and try to think like Janet.

"She doesn't have her cell phone…she must have forgotten it on the table." Eddie said

"Ok well I know some people to call, just sit tight." Hannah said doubt already creeping into her mind.

Janet made it to the shore within three hours. She remembered this place that Dwayne would go when he needed to get away from everyone. It was a little bed and breakfast right on the beach and was literally out in the middle of no where. Unless you knew it was there it would be pretty hard to find. She never told anyone about it because she just remember it as she was driving. Luckily for them both, there was a room left for rent. She reserved the room for the whole week so she could have some time to get her thoughts together and figure out what she is going to do with the rest of her life. Not really knowing what was happening back in the Ridge she decided for tonight she would put it out of her mind and concentrate on her son and his needs.

As Janet got herself and Aiden tucked away in their beautiful room, she noticed he had been sleeping for quite a long time. Turns out that long car rides must help with the colic. She prayed for a peaceful night sleep and a nice walk on the beach with her baby boy in the morning.

Eddie had just gone over to Hannah's house and started calling everyone they could think of who would know where she would have gone. No one had a clue. With every phone call Eddie grew more hopeless and upset. "Why does she keep doing this?" he thought. "Where could she be? its good that she didn't take any clothes right? That means it will be just a small amount of time…maybe over night." He thought. Then on a whim he called and checked their bank accounts. He wasn't exactly sure why he chose to do that but something told him too. When he checked her "Dwayne" account, the place where she kept the money he gave her, he noticed there was a huge sum missing, his heart sank.


	51. Chapter 51

Chapter 51:

Janet prayed for a peaceful and restful nights sleep but that did not happen. She could not sleep at all. Oddly enough Aiden was sleeping more peacefully then usual. She tossed and turned and couldn't get the visual of Eddie hugging Rory out of her head. She kept thinking, "I went in there to see what was going on and didn't just assume what was happening…why did he yell at me as if I was interrupting them or something…all I wanted was to try and get back to where we were…like the day we had Aiden and he gave me that beautiful ring and told me how much he loved me…I know that I have been unhappy lately and maybe not so nice but I am sooo tired and Aiden is so fussy…I just couldn't do it all…maybe he was turning to her for comfort but why was he so angry with me when I came in…why didn't he even try and find me after I left? Is it too late for us? What am I going to do if it is?" Janet's mind just would not turn off.

She reached for her purse and was looking for her cell phone when she remembered that she had left it on the table and didn't go back and get it thinking that it would just be a distraction for her and Eddie. "Well I guess I will have to find some other way."

Then she stopped and thought, "Who am I going to call? Eddie is probably at BFW's and Hannah doesn't know that I left…" she thought. She sat up in the beautiful bed that she was laying in and stared at Aiden sleeping so peacefully.

She thought, "this was not how I pictured my life going…having a child was suppose to bring us closer together not further apart…I love him but what if that isn't enough for him…we haven't even touched each other for so much as a kiss since we got home…Lord I wish you could just tell me what to do." Tears began to fall from her eyes.

Back in the Ridge, Eddie and Hannah sat on the couch having exhausted any one they thought would know where she went. They didn't call her grandparents yet because they didn't want them to worry if she wasn't there. Eddie sat there thinking about the money she took…"what was she thinking? Why did she leave just like that without packing or planning or telling anyone, not even Hannah? Was she really that upset by seeing Rory and I hugging…really it wasn't like I was kissing her or anything?" suddenly Hannah spoke bringing him out of his thoughts…

"so tell me what exactly happened in the office Eddie, she would not have taken off if it wasn't anything?" Hannah was looking intently at him

"Rory stopped by and said that she was working in the area and just wanted to say hi. She offered a hug and I went to hug her and I guess it felt nice to get a hug, Janet hasn't exactly been very affectionate lately since Aiden came home…perhaps I lingered too long who knows the next thing I knew she walked in and asked what was going on as if we were doing something wrong and I said "we're just old friends hugging whats the big deal and she said 'well I'll just leave you two alone then' and rushed out the door…" Eddie said still trying to figure it out.

"so you went after her and what happened then?" Hannah asked

"ahhh, no I didn't go after her, I stopped and Rory asked me what that was about and I kind unloaded on her all the stuff that I had been thinking about. I guess I didn't realize that we had been there so long and when we were done talking I realized what I needed to do and went to find her and that's when I got home and she was gone…all that I have is her cell phone which was on the kitchen table…I don't even know why she dropped by?" he said.

"Are you kidding me right now Eddie? You didn't go after her and you are wondering now why she is gone? Geez, you are such a man. Eddie she came there to spend some time with you and try to reconnect since she had been feeling like the two of you were growing distant and she wanted to work on that, I offered to take Aiden over night so the two of you could…well you know I shouldn't have to spell it out for you…" she said rolling her eyes upwards.

"Eddie, how could you just let her go after practically making her feel like the odd one there and not Rory…Janet is your WIFE…she should have been the one you hugged not Rory…Why do you keep doing this when that woman comes to town?" Hannah exasperated.

Eddie sat there and was thinking about what Hannah just said and she was right. He was harsh towards Janet and she should have been the one he was hugging…"ahhh Geez, Eddie brilliant you did it AGAIN!" he thought

"Well what am I going to do now Hannah I need to talk to her and every time she gets upset she runs…what is with that?" he said irritatedly.

"I don't know that there is much we can do except wait and hope she calls one of us and find out where she is…give her what she needs…obviously she has a lot on her mind and maybe she just needs some space. At least this time she did confront you and not disappear like last time but seriously Eddie you and Rory – that friendship needs to be dead and buried already…how many times are you going to let this woman come in between you and Janet?" she asked

"Why does she need to come in between me and Janet Hannah, I don't love Rory I love Janet why does she not get that?" he said disappointed.

"When was the last time she heard you say that Eddie or felt it from you…I understand where you two are at believe when Sam was a baby it was a challenge but I didn't have anyone else to depend on but you both do…why did you wait for Janet to comfort you or give you those things…you could have told her all this stuff before and maybe we wouldn't be sitting here." Hannah said getting up to go to the kitchen for more coffee.

"I know your right Hannah this isn't all her fault but seriously taking off on a whim with my son, without her cell phone and taking out $2000 I mean really where is she going to Disneyworld with that kind of cash…I just can't keep running after her all the time…" Eddie said sadly.

Hannah turned around and looked at him, "Eddie what are you saying? Are you giving up on Janet and your son because if you are you had better think long and hard – this is not the Eddie that I remember who was planning on spending the rest of his life alone…Is Janet right are you involved with someone else, Rory?" she felt strange even saying the words but the vibe coming from Eddie was giving her the same feeling that Janet was talking about earlier.

"No Hannah I am not involved with anyone especially Rory I just don't see why I have to be mean to her to make all you women happy. I am saying that it is frustrating having to "find her" all the time when she gets upset and now she has taking my son with her…is this going to happen every time we have a fight?" Eddie was exhausted and just hurt.

Hannah sat down next to him and placed her hand on his arm, "Eddie did it ever occur to you that the reason she leaves like this is that she can't bear being without you and it is her way of coping just like yours is to turn to an old friend at all the wrong moments." She said calmly.

Eddie thought "well she did have a point there but I don't like feeling helpless and right now I feel completely helpless.".

"You know what there is nothing we can do tonight…I will call her grandparents tomorrow and say hi and see if she is there in a casual way but something tells me she is not…she has found some freakin spot that we don't know of and she'll stay I guess until she is ready for whatever…" he said throwing his hands up in the air as if defeated.

"If she calls me I will let you know but try and get some sleep ok…I know Janet and she will contact somebody, eventually." With that Hannah went into the kitchen.

Eddie left the house and got into his truck. He looked down at the steering wheel and just could not believe how this day turned out. He collected himself and drove off towards his home.

Janet finally fell asleep and was woken up by Aiden's cries for food. She got up and scooped up her adorable little boy and fed him breakfast. Luckily she traveled always with much of his things like a play pen and bouncy seat and lots of extra diapers and formula in the event that she needed it so he had all the comforts of home. She on the other hand didn't so she knew shopping was in her future.

She put Aiden in his bouncy seat and put him in the bathroom on the floor so she could shower. Somehow he seemed so much more at ease here and he hadn't cried much at all. She wondered why that was but to be honest even though she made this last minute decision she felt more relaxed too…maybe it was because she didn't have to feel awkward or pressured to be happy and energetic for Eddie. That sounded so silly when she thought it but it was somewhat true. He always appeared as if he was disappointed in her and she felt as though he were avoiding contact with her because of it. It seemed to be so far from the Eddie she fell in love with but apparently the stress of having a fussy baby was changing them both. She finished up her shower and when she walked through the curtain Aiden smiled and giggled. It was so nice to have a happy baby instead of the crying…she thought "maybe I'll stay longer than I had planned."

She put on the clothes she came in and changed Aiden. They headed out of the bed and breakfast and drove to some shops that Janet had seen when driving in. They spent several hours walking around, mostly Janet as Aiden was nicely strapped in his stroller. She bought several outfits and some pajama's. It was a great shopping day where everything not only fit but looked pretty good…something that very rarely happened to her. Janet stopped at farmers markets and got some fun foods to munch on and keep in her room and they ate at this little sandwich shop along the beach. Janet felt so relaxed and happy yet she had this underlying fear in her stomach that her life was about to crumble before her eyes and she didn't have the faintest idea of what to do or where to go from here.


	52. Chapter 52

Chapter 52:

As the days progressed both Janet and Eddie were struggling with their feelings and how to deal with them. Janet knew that she would need to return home and face her husband and whatever situation lay ahead in that area but she just wasn't ready to say goodbye to Eddie. She loved him and she didn't want the distance that was between them but what if it were too late. If he found someone else, how would she handle that? What if it was Rory? Would she stay and fight for her marriage and let him go so he could be happy? She didn't want to think about these things but at the end of the day she knew that the reason why he didn't come after her when she left that night was his reservations on their relationship and she took it as his decision on whether or not he wanted to be with her. She knew he would be a good father either way but right now she didn't feel a part of him at all…she was partly to blame she knew but what about him? She did the best she could to take care of everything so he didn't have much else to deal with other than work. She tried her hardest with Aiden to keep him settled and never made Eddie deal with his fits at night she just didn't understand what she did so wrong that tore them apart. But she resigned her self that at the end of the weekend she would return home and face the music either way she had to know so she could at least move on with her life.

Eddie was in bad shape by the end of the week. He couldn't focus on anything at work and he hated being at home with out his family there. He had made so many mistakes in his life and most of the big ones were with Janet but this time, this was the biggest because he was just as responsible for this situation as Janet was. Could he really blame her? What did he do – stay at the office to avoid the uncomfortable tension at home – isn't that the same thing as running away? No, he thought "I am no better I have not given her any reason to believe in me and now she thinks I have developed feelings for someone else and that is the reason for my distance." He just wished he could think of a way to find her so he could tell her how he feels.

As usual, he was sitting at his desk staring at the picture of his family when someone walked into the shop. It was a random person looking completely lost and asking Eddie for some help. The woman said, "Hi I was wondering if you could help me…I am looking for Wittenberg and I don't think I am there even though my navigator says I am." Eddie smiled and said, "I don't know what is wrong with those things, they always lead people to the Ridge…Wittenberg is about 10 miles south of here, you just have to turn right at the next stop light and that will take you there…so much for technology." He smiled and she thanked him and left the store. Suddenly Eddie got this thought in his head. When they had Aiden Janet decided to trade in her Jeep for a decked out Minivan which came with a special On star service. She never activated the service but he wondered if he did if they could pinpoint where the van was on it navigation system. He thought "hell its worth a try."

A few phone calls later and Eddie was beaming. It worked. The navigation system through On Star pin points the location of the Van so in the event that the van is in an accident the systems operator can alert the police to their exact location. He couldn't believe that she was that far away but as long as he had the tracking capability he would be able to find her.

Janet returned to her room and Aiden was napping as now was his ritual. She was going to take a nap herself but she really wasn't tired anymore. She had been able to catch up on her sleep and felt refreshed again. She just could not believe how different Aiden was here. She thought, "I wonder if all the stress from the tension between Eddie and I were causing his colic to be worse?" Figures, she thought if I would have known all I needed was a get away I would have left weeks ago.

Aiden was asleep for a few hours and Janet had settled on her patio just staring out at the water. It was so peaceful there she wished that she had brought Eddie to this place. There were so many things that she wished she had done differently. Suddenly this noise brought her out of her thoughts. She looked around and was trying to make sense of the noise when she finally focused on a person standing at the beach yelling her name…she looked more closely and once she focused all she could do was stare….there he was, Eddie waving his hands and yelling Janet as loudly as he could.

Janet stood and felt it difficult to move. She was so shocked that she didn't know what to do. She was so excited on the inside yet bewildered as to how he found her to what was he going to say. He started to walk quickly towards her both looking at each other somewhat stunned.

Eddie approached the railing of her patio and said, "I can't believe I found you." Janet just looked back at him but before she could say anything Eddie placed his hands on her face and kissed her with so much passion she forgot whatever it was that was in her head.  
"Before you say anything I want you to know Janet that I love you and I'm sorry for what I said to you at the shop. I know that we are going to have to talk about all of that but right now I just want to hold you and tell you that I love you and I don't want anyone else – there is no one else but you and I know we will work through all of it…that is if you want to, you do want to right?" Eddie said with this light in his eyes and expectations of agreement.

"Eddie….as the tears began to fall from her eyes…I…I love you more than anything aside from Aiden…I am sorry that I left but I could not bear the thought of losing you to someone else…I …I just…" Janet was so emotional at this point she couldn't get the words out….

"Janet, Janet….you aren't going to lose me…you are my wife the mother of my son…our son…there is no one in this world more important to me than you and Aiden are…" growing impatient he says "how do I get over this railing thing?" he is looking around.

Janet smiles and points to where the gate is. Eddie runs through the sand and opens the gate and Janet walks towards him and he to her. They embrace so tightly not even air could pass between the two. They pull back slightly and look into each other's eyes…"I want to make love to my wife." Eddie said so intently. Janet just takes a step back and turns around, looks over her shoulder and puts her arm out reaching for his hand. Eddie grabs it and follows her into the bedroom that she has been living in the last 5 days. Janet looks down on Aiden who is still fast asleep (thank God she thinks) and turns and faces Eddie with her finger to her lip as if to say "shhhhh".

Eddie smiled but never said a word he just moved closer to Janet and the two began kissing and touching each as they used to before Aiden was born. It wasn't a slow reunion by any means but not a word was spoken or a sound was heard just the two of them reconnecting on an intimate level that exceeded any prior union. There was something about being so still and silent that added so much to the emotion between the two. As they lay there wrapped in each others arms, both had tears forming in their eyes. Both of them knew from that moment on that no matter what happened or what they needed to say to each other that they would work it out because the love that grew years earlier was not only still there but so strong.

Eddie drifted off to sleep as they lay there in silence as he had just driven several hours to find her but Janet stayed awake and watched Eddie sleep. She memorized every feature of his face and smiled at how amazing it felt to be this close to her husband again and how she longed for this connection with Eddie. All the doubts that she had about his love for her were entirely gone and she felt so content for the first time in a long time. Just then Aiden began to stir so Janet quietly and softly removed herself from Eddie's embrace and went to fix Aiden a bottle in the bathroom. While she was in the bathroom with Aiden, Eddie woke up and felt a little disoriented for a second. Then sudden panic set in that he had only dreamt what had just happened as he reached for Janet and she was no where to be found. He sat up quickly with tears beginning to form in his eyes when he looked around the room and realized he wasn't dreaming that this was not his home but he had found Janet. Just then the bathroom door slowly opened and Janet emerged holding Aiden in her arms. She smiled when she realized that Eddie was awake and she saw the fear on his face and then the slow smile spread across it.

"Hi, do you want to feed your son?" Janet said to Eddie who was adjusting himself in the bed to a sitting up position. "I would love to, I missed this little guy so much." He said reaching out for Aiden. Janet settled Aiden in his arms and gave him the bottle and went to sit in the chair when Eddie said, "no you come sit next to me, I missed you just as much." He said smiling.

"Ok" she said sitting next to Eddie on the bed and snuggled in so close to him while he talked to Aiden and fed him. Aiden was the happiest of babies at that moment. He couldn't stop smiling and cooing and grabbing at Eddie's fingers. Eddie was amazed how much he had changed in the few days he hadn't seen him. He also noticed he wasn't as fussy or crying as much.

Finally, Janet was the first to speak as Aiden was fed and burped and just playing with his toes laying on his back on the bed in between Janet and Eddie. "I'm sorry Eddie for leaving like I did…I wasn't trying to hurt you or anything I was just so upset. I thought that you had started seeing someone else because you hadn't come home the night before and you had been spending so many hours at work and not at home and then I saw you hug Rory for a pretty long while before I came in and you seemed angry with me I just needed to get out of there, can you understand that?" she looked at him as if pleading.

"Janet I was angry at first. I couldn't figure out why you keep running every time we have a fight but then I thought about everything and my behavior and realized that in my own way I was doing it too…staying at work so I wouldn't have to come home to all the tension. I should have just talked to you about what I was feeling. I guess I never expected parenthood would involve this." He said honestly.

"But I promise you Janet when we both said 'I do' I meant those vows – I was not looking for anything from anyone else…Rory happened to come into the shop that day and I guess when we hugged I had missed that from you…we hadn't touched each other in such a long time I just missed the closeness. Rory was the wrong person to do that with but then we talked after you left and I realized that I needed to make something happen and go talk to you or figure it out and by that time you were gone." He said sadly.

"I have never been so happy to hear those words in all my life Eddie. I came to your office that night to try and work on our relationship as I could tell we were drifting apart and you felt so distant to me. When I saw her and you seemed so angry with me I just ran out but you didn't follow. I waited in the parking lot for what seemed like hours and you still didn't come out so I took that as you were just done with me and our marriage and wanted some one else who didn't come with all the baggage that I have. I just don't know what happened Eddie. It just seemed like I couldn't make anyone happy anymore." She said softly and slowly the tears began to surface.

"hey, hey…you have always made me happy but we needed to realize that this parenting thing takes two people and you took on way too much of the burden of raising him and I let you do that…that was wrong of me…had I stepped in you wouldn't have been so tired and exhausted by all the crying and lack of sleep. But this is in the past now and now we know that regardless of what happens now we have to make a point to keep our relationship going. I can't live without this Janet. We have a connection that can not be broken and even just sitting here with you I can feel it. Promise me that everyday we will hug or kiss or both or something no matter what so we don't lose each other again. Promise me Janet…" he said to her looking her directly in the eyes and grabbing her hands.

"I promise Eddie. I can't live without this either. I don't think Aiden can either because ever since we have been here he hasn't been fussy at all. He is so happy and smiley and sleepy and calm…it was as if the stress we were producing with each other was making him worse…I don't know but he is just so smiley now." She said looking now down at Aiden still playing intently with his toes.

"I did notice something different about him…definitely a happier child." He smiled and grabbed Aiden's toe away from him and he frowned slightly and Eddie released it and he smiled so big and giggled – as if Eddie was playing a game.

Just then Eddie and Janet looked at each other. They mouthed the words "I love you" and both settled back against the head board and just spend the rest of the evening enjoying each other's company and their son.


	53. Chapter 53

Chapter 53:

The next morning Eddie and Janet woke up wrapped in each other arms and Aiden was sleeping in his play pen soundly. After hours of playing with his toes and enjoying time with both of his parents he was ready for bed once again. Eddie fed him his last bottle and layed him down in his bed shortly thereafter. Eddie smiled when he saw his son's eyes merely flutter but never wake up. This was a sight he had not seen at their home. Eddie knew that things would be different now because even Aiden felt a sense of calm. It was the first night that Eddie can remember Aiden had slept the entire night through.

Eddie was the first to wake up and he looked around slightly at his surroundings. "Nope" he thought "I am still here and Janet is here and Aiden is sleeping…not a dream just a very pleasant reality." He took a moment to remember the day before and smiled at their uneventful evening of just being in bed playing with their son talking and laughing and touching each other playfully. He thought, "Why did we not do this at home? Well it doesn't matter now because we know what we need to do and I will make sure we both stick to the promise…no matter what because this is the life I imagined with Janet." He looked at her and she was starting to move a little but she had the cutest smile on her face he had a hard time resisting what was on his mind, then he thought, "why resist?" With that thought in mind he moved slightly and kissed his beautiful wife.

Janet was sleeping so contently and felt so warm unlike the morning before. She began to open her eyes when she felt lips on hers and she realized that her husband was right in front of her. She melted into the kiss that lead to another and another to the point where one of them had to make the move so she thought "I guess it's up to me to do something before Aiden figures out we are awake." She moved her hands from behind his neck slowly down his back and searched to see if he was wearing his usual boxers…"nope" she thought "this is going to be easier than I thought."

Eddie was a bit startled by her gesture but inside his heart was soaring because she was making the first move and he loved it when she did. He decided, "Well two can play this game." So he began to do a bit of roaming himself. Soon they were all over one another and loving the feeling of it. It had been so long since either of them took the time with each other and they both needed to feel that connection. Yesturday was amazing and needed but today was much slower and felt simply amazing to both of them. They knew that their time could potentially be interrupted but somehow it didn't seem to matter.

Eddie finally made the move and shifted above Janet. They both took a second to look at one another briefly and each smiled before going back to the kissing that they both enjoyed so much. And much like the day before they were very quiet, no words or sounds like them enjoying their first morning of renewed commitment to themselves and their relationship once again confirming the love they shared so purely and deeply. It wasn't as quick as the day before but just as satisfying. Janet was trying to hold out as much as possible because she felt so good with Eddie doing what he does so well but at one point she could no longer contain the impending climax. She grabbed Eddie's head and kissed him hard as to contain the moan that she knew would be released…that motion alone pushed Eddie over the edge that he was fighting as well and the two shared the culmination of their love making together. Once they settled back into their previous spot on the bed they looked at each other.

"I love you so much Eddie…thank you for finding me. I can't tell you what these last 24 hours have meant." Janet said looking into his eyes and rubbing his cheek with her fingers.

"I promise I will never give you a hard time again about picking out a vehicle and having to have all that fancy stuff on it because that is how I found you – the On Star button you got with the van." Eddie said grinning.

"Ok, but we don't have the on star service how would that have helped you?" Janet said confused

"We do now." Eddie laughed. "This woman came into the shop looking for Wittenberg and said her navigation system said she was there but she didn't think it was right so I pointed her in the right direction but that got me thinking about the navigation system and so I remembered the sales guy explaining that to you. I thought maybe if I called them and activated it, it would tell me the location of the van…and it worked." Eddie said proudly.

"Geez, when are they going to straighten out that Wittenberg situation? Do you know how many times I have told people how to get there because their GPS took them to the Ridge?" she said slightly shaking her head.

"lucky for us…" eddie said somehow a little lost in thought.

"I guess your right…what are you thinking about?" she said noticing his distant look.

"How long were you planning on staying gone? You did take out quite a bit of cash which scared me." Eddie said looking more intently in her direction.

"I don't know Eddie, I hadn't really planned any of this so I just took out enough for me to buy some clothes and things we would need and to stay somewhere. I didn't even know where I was going until I had been driving for a bit." She said

"How did you find this place…it is way off the beaten track…I mean completely out in the middle of no where." He said.

"It actually was a place that Dwayne had talked about when we were just friends. He said he would come to this bed and breakfast to get away from everyone. I never understood why until he told me he was sick and then I understood he came here when his symptoms were acting up so no one would see him until they subsided a bit." She said looking out the window.

"So the two of you never came here together or you did?" Eddie said not really sure why he wanted to know.

Janet looked at Eddie quizzically "no we didn't come here together…he only mentioned the name I had to look up the place on the computer and that is how I found out how to get here. I just remember him saying it was isolated and quiet."

"Oh" Eddie said relieved somehow "I would love to thank him because this place truly is amazing…how long were you planning to stay."

"I paid until the end of the weekend so if you want we can stay until then and make it like a second honeymoon but with Aiden present…that is if you can be gone for that long?" she said hopefully.

"That sounds like an amazing idea…I may never want to go back." He said snuggling into her

Aiden decided to make his presence known in that moment, "well look who decided to join us." Eddie said.

Janet got up quickly and put on a t shirt…the one Eddie had recently removed…and grabbed Aiden from his bed. "well hello there little one…I suppose you are pretty hungry." Aiden began crying and Janet knew he wasn't foolin around his tummy was empty. Eddie also got out of bed, put his boxers back on and went immediately into the bathroom to get Aiden's bottle ready. The two worked together perhaps for the first time to fed Aiden and it worked so much better than when Janet was solely responsible for his care and needs.

The three of them settled back onto the bed once Eddie finished getting the bottle ready and Janet then fed Aiden. Eddie grabbed him and burped him. He let out this loud burp and Eddie smiled, "that's my boy" pride shinning in his eyes. Janet just looked at him and laughed…"just wait I am sure there are some other noises he makes that you can take pride in as well…they usually happen after he eats as well." She said jokingly.

"Yeah but you are much better at handling those I think and who am I to stand in the way of a professional doing her best work, really?" Eddie said playfully

"Yeah we will just see about that." Janet said with a slight glare.

"Oh my gosh, you should really call Hannah I completely forgot to tell her about finding you…she is pretty worried…you left your cell phone at the house." Eddie said concerned

"Yeah I didn't think I would need it since I was planning that night to spend with only you and when that didn't happen I didn't come back home to get it and forgot until I was here actually that I had left it on the table. Did you bring it?" she asked.

"I did it is in my jacket pocket." He said motioning to his jacket that was thrown on the chair.

She reached into the pocket and grabbed her phone and his phone was in there as well along with a piece of paper. She took all the items out and glanced at the paper to see what it was. Somewhat shocked to see Rory 547 – 6748 written on the paper. She looked at Eddie and he smiled and then noticed her look wasn't exactly a happy one.

"What?" he said

"I know that I have absolutely no right to ask you this but why do you insist on being friends with Rory? Or was her purpose of giving you her telephone number of a separate nature?" she said somewhat upset.

"What?" he said looking at her confused and then he remembered when they finished talking that night at BFW she wrote down her cell phone number in case he wanted to talk while she was in town on her modeling job.

"CRAP!" he thought. He had forgotten about that stupid number in his jacket. Hannah was right. Why was this woman constantly getting in his way with Janet? What was so important about this woman that Eddie couldn't leave well enough alone. Eddie knew that he didn't have feelings for her but what was it about her that he just couldn't walk away from when she came around.

Janet just looked at him with disbelief…he wasn't answering her and looked like he was trying to think of something to say. There was something in his hesitancy that bothered her.

"When Rory stopped by she was in town on a modeling job and left her cell phone number with me in case I needed to talk or get in touch with her…that's all, we had talked about everything going on with you and me and I guess she was trying to be supportive." He said honestly

"You talked to Rory about me…like how unhappy you were with me or how awful a mother I was…what exactly were you talking about?" Janet was getting a little upset now.

"Yeah well no not like you're a bad mother your not but I did tell her that things were not good between us and I wanted that to change. She actually offered some great advice in that she suggested we talk and she even reflected on how you might be feeling…" he said hoping that she would relax about it.

"Oh well that is great Eddie I am so happy she could once again CONVINCE you to come back to me. That is just great!" janet said beginning to put some pants on and a sweat shirt. "You know I think I am going to go for a walk on the beach for a minute can you stay here with Aiden?" she said starting to feel tears stinging her eyes.

Eddie looked at her and didn't understand what just happened. "Why do you need to go for a walk Janet? I talked to her, no more, I don't understand why you have this insecurity when it comes to her…I LOVE YOU remember…I MARRIED you remember" he was becoming upset.

Janet just looked at him and didn't know what to say. So she said the one thing that would get her out of the conversation, "I am going to call Hannah…you said to call her so I thought I would go out by the beach…I'll be right back." She said quietly and walked out through the patio door and began dialing the phone so Eddie could see. As she began to walk off the patio and out on to the sand the tears came fast and furious. She didn't know what she was going to say but suddenly she heard a voice, "OH MY GOD, thank God you called me…I have been worried sick where are you?" Hannah said practically screaming into the phone.

Janet tried to pull herself together or Hannah would figure out she was upset and quick. "Hey Hannah, I'm so sorry for leaving on ya…I just really had a bad day but it's all ok…Eddie is actually here with me so everything is good." She said trying to sound ok.

Hannah wasn't buying it. "Well if everything is ok why do you sound so not ok?"

"I am such an idiot…he told me to call you and I went to grab my cell phone out of his pocket and Rory's number was in his pocket too and then I asked him why he had it and he once again got upset that I even asked…" she said now somewhat rambling.

Hannah sat there listening and thought to herself, "WHY do I keep having to hear about RORY, for Pete's sake what is with this girl."

"…and then he said well I married you and I love you and that should make it all better and you shouldn't care about her being with me and blah blah blah…why do I care so much…I don't know maybe because every time she shows up Eddie does something with her that upsets me…like lets see the first time he kissed her and this time he was hugging her relishing the feeling of the hug because I wasn't hugging him at home…yes I believe that is how he explained it." Janet now growing more upset by the word.

"Ok Ok Ok…this is the deal, we need to figure out this Rory situation once and for all. Eddie needs to figure out why this ex girlfriend from his past keeps affecting his relationship with his wife and why he keeps getting so defensive about it…which isn't really helping your reaction I must say." Hannah said with a hint of sarcasm.

"I know I think that is what's bothering me…he was so angry with me at the shop when I asked what was going on with them and just now about why he would have her number…is it wrong for me to even ask him…that is what it feels like? And then he tells me that they had this discussion about how unhappy I was and how unhappy he was…I am sure she thinking 'wow Eddie great choice in a wife'…" Janet was mimicking Rory.

"Now lets not get ahead of our selves here Janet. You both WERE unhappy but that is to be expected in a marriage with an infant…that is stressful…life is stressful and we aren't happy ALL the time so the fact that he talked about that doesn't make you a bad choice. I think your feelings are hurt because it appears that he is always on her SIDE when she is around vs. on your side – which really there are no sides but it is his attitude that gives you that impression and you are just reacting to it. Talk to the man about it…where are you now if he is there?" she wondered aloud

"Oh I am on the beach. I am staying at this bed and breakfast on the beach, one that Dwayne told me about because it was or is literally in the middle of no where… I thought it would be a great place to think…so right now I am walking on the beach talking to you…he is back in the room taking care of Aiden."

"Ok then get your butt back in there and talk to your husband…I swear the two of you are so frustrating some times…ahhhh, I love ya but you both drive me nuts sometimes…just call me when you get back and please just talk to the man would ya…love ya." With that Hannah hung up.

Janet stood there for a minute staring out at the water. God how she loved this place, but Hannah was right she needed to talk to him. She turned around to go back and he was standing right behind her. She was startled and she said, "how long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough…" he said.


	54. Chapter 54

Chapter 54:

"Where's Aiden?" Janet says trying to figure out what to say next.

"I just layed him down he fell asleep…can we please talk about this?" Eddie says somewhat annoyed.

"Yeah I think we should but lets at least go and sit on the patio I don't want Aiden to be in there alone." She said beginning to walk back.

Eddie just stands there a second some what stunned that she just turned to walk away. So many things are going through his mind…

They reach the patio and Janet looks in on Aiden and he is fast asleep. She grabs a blanket and wraps it around her shoulders before she returns to the patio. She sits down on the chair and waits for Eddie to sit as well.

Janet speaks first. "I think we do need to talk about I don't think you get me at all Eddie. When it comes to Rory you always assume it is insecurity that drives my decisions but that is not true." She says looking at Eddie. He looks at her briefly and says "maybe your right, I don't understand why you react the way you do." He says somewhat frustrated.

"When you kissed Rory you said to me later on when we talked about that incident that you wanted me to stop and confront you and "kick your ass" I believe you said so in this situation I did just that Eddie. I came into the shop after sitting and watching you hug her and let that hug linger. I asked you what was going on and you responded to me like I was the person who was in the wrong in that situation. You reacted with anger in your voice and it felt like you were so unhappy that I would even ask you what you were doing as if I should be ok with it just because I am your wife and I know you love me. It has nothing to do with those things Eddie. I am not as insecure as I once was but I feel like you think of me that way. I was angry Eddie and I felt like BECAUSE I am your wife and you love me that you would have enough RESPECT for me to treat Rory that way. I feel like every time Rory shows up you chose to 'defend' her when it comes to me as if I am in the wrong. I don't feel that you should have any type of relationship with her out of RESPECT for me. There I said it. I know that upsets you in some way but that is just it I don't know why it should?" Janet says if she finally released this weight on her showers and was now looking down on her hands at the wedding ring and ring that Eddie gave her the day Aiden was born as if to remember the happy times.

Eddie looked at her and didn't respond right away. Her words were swirling around his brain like a tornado. "out of RESPECT for me…BECAUSE I am your wife…." He thought to himself, "I am a jerk aren't I…I have been so focused on her past insecurities I didn't even see that she was looking to me to reaffirm our relationship when Rory came around I didn't do that…I pushed her aside and defended this literally non –relationship with Rory…I should never have said what I said to Janet…God I am an idiot."

Eddie looked up to say some thing to Janet but then she spoke again…

"Eddie I know that in the past I have had a lot of insecurities that I have had to face and deal with but when I was gone all those months in Hope I came to terms with a lot of things. I don't have those same insecurities now. When I said yes to marrying you and then "I do" there were no more insecurities Eddie there was me and you. I know that it has been very difficult with Aiden and his colick and all the struggles we have faced but the problem was not me being insecure about myself the problem was we stopped working together and talking to each other. What hurt the most for me Eddie was that when I walked into the shop that night you were willing to defend her being there and this hug you were obviously enjoying but you weren't willing to defend me and our relationship. You were willing to stay and talk to Rory about our relationship and what you were unhappy about but you weren't willing to stop me from leaving and talk to me about our relationship…that isn't my insecurity Eddie that is your choices and the fact that once again you put her first before me, your wife…that is why I was angry and that is why when I saw her number I got angry…when are you going to stop putting Rory before me? When is that going to happen Eddie? Is it ever going to happen?" she said more calmly than he had ever heard her say anything.

Eddie sat there as tears began to form in his eyes. She was right…in that moment he knew every word she said she was right. He didn't have an answer for her though because he didn't know why he did that or that he was doing that until right then. He thought, "what a fool you are Latekka!"

Eddie got up and he went to kneel in front of Janet. He placed his head in her lap and Janet was a little taken a back. There was something on his face that Janet had not seen before…a vulnerability or a feeling of remorse maybe that he was so overcome with that he was having a hard time speaking in that moment. She could feel a slight silent sob come from him and she knew that he heard her.

Eddie looked up at Janet with tears in his eyes and his face and spoke so softly, " Janet I get what you are trying to say and I am so very sorry for how you felt that night. You are right I did ask you to confront me if ever needed to and you did this time. You could have walked away not knowing the situation but you didn't and I just completely blew you off. I don't have a reason for why it is that I do this but I am going to tell you right now that it will NEVER happen again. You are right Janet you are my wife and my family is the most important thing to me…I should have had that conversation with you not Rory…I should have asked Rory to leave and talked with you…I am so sorry Janet for not seeing what was right in front of my face. Never again…." He drifted off and once again layed his head in her lap wrapping his arms around her waist so tightly as if he was hanging on for dear life.

Janet now had tears in her eyes because she knew he heard her and finally understood her feeling about Rory. He finally understood why she left and felt so hurt by his actions. It wasn't what he said to her it was what he didn't say. She knew that no matter what happened now that Eddie would be there for her and with her regardless of the circumstances because he finally got what it was to be a husband and a father but a partner and a friend. She felt this overwhelming sense of calm come over her. It had been a long road for these two but she finally felt like they were one and would now be able to make it work in their relationship and their family. She lifted his head and he had a somewhat terrified look on his face. She simply smiled slightly and opened her arms to wrap the blanket around them both. A small gesture but one that told Eddie with no words that she understood what he said and she was opening herself to him once again except this time it came with a whole different outlook of the future. He smiled slightly as well and once again placed his head in her lap but this time when he put his arms around her waist it was under the blanket and she wrapped her arms around him covering them both with the blanket and that is where they stayed once again reaffirming their bond that now that they truly understood one another would never be broken by anyone especially Rory.

The next day Eddie and Janet spent the day walking around the town and Janet was showing Eddie all the places that Aiden and her found the first day they were there. They spent the day together holding hands while they walked and took turns pushing the stroller that Aiden was clearly having a ball being in. He giggled and cooed the whole day and they took him from place to place. They decided to spend that night going out to dinner so they got as dressed up as they could with what they had. Janet wore an outfit that she had bought earlier that week that looked amazing on her. Eddie was just in awe of Janet when she emerged from the bathroom in this beautiful simple black shirt with a subtle scarf with a slight sparkle wrapped loosely around her neck. She had a tan pair of Capri pants on with the cutest black strappy wedges she had ever owned. She typically didn't wear these kinds of clothes but she had seen it on a mannekin at the little shop and decided to try it on. It looked so amazing with her free flowing curls and long dark hair that she had to splurge and buy it. Eddie immediately got up and walked over to her and said, "you look absolutely beautiful Janet" and he kissed her so passionately placing his hands on either side of her face.

Janet knew she looked good in the outfit but had no idea Eddie would react that way. They headed out for dinner and enjoyed the evening immensely. Aiden was an excellent baby and was so cute in his high chair. Many of the patrons at the little restaurant would stop and tell them what a beautiful little boy he was. Eddie and Janet spent most of the meal enjoying the conversation and tending to Aiden. Eddie grabbed Janet's hand frequently from across the table and there was so much love and affection between the two anyone in that restaurant could see it. They finished and headed back to the bed and breakfast for their last night. They got Aiden down for the night and spent some time on the patio just holding hands and staring out at the water. Eddie spoke, "I know that this trip was neither planned or always had great moments but it was needed…we need to remember this trip always because it forced us both to see things that we didn't see or maybe we didn't want to see…we should definitely make this a once a year or maybe twice a year trip…however maybe Hannah can watch Aiden next time" he said as he raised his eyebrows.

Janet looked over at him and smiled, "most definitely…I love you Eddie."

"I love you too Janet." With that they went back to watching the water.


End file.
